"Dead people revive more flowers than living ones because regret is stronger than gratitude"

-Anne Frank

Song-Buzzcut season; lorde

"Why are we here?" Serena asks me as I pull her farther into the woods. She has her phone in one hand and I'm holding the other one. She wearing designer shoes, a shirt that cost at least $150 and a fancy brand of jeans I can't pronounce.

Her hair is perfectly curled and her face is full of makeup not that I mind. She's pretty either way. When we were 13 Marlee lectured me on the reasons girls where makeup.

She made Theo and I sit down while she went on a whole rant about how girls don't wear makeup for boys but to make themselves feel pretty.

"You'll see" I reply with a smile. I hold a blanket in my other hand as I navigate around the different trees.

It's the night of our weekly date night. Usually we go out to dinner or to a movie to make out in. Sometimes when her parents aren't home we just go to her house.

I wanted to do something special tonight though. She has a grossed out look on her face as she gingerly steps over branches and mud. Once we reach the edge of the woods where there's a large patch of grass I stop.

Taking in the beauty of the setting sun over the large lake I drop Serena's hand and lay down the blanket. I sit down and pat the blanket for her to do the same.

"Isn't it beautiful?" I look to her but see her tapping on her phone.

"Mhm" she mumbles. "Ugh! There's no connection at this stupid place!"

"Well we are in the middle of the woods" I reply sarcastically. Grabbing her phone from her hands I click it off and kiss her cheek. "I was thinking we could just enjoy the view"

"Or" a devilish smirk forms on her face. "We could find another way to pass time" her hand trails up my shirt.

"We always do this, why don't we just spend time together?"

It's not that I don't enjoy it because trust me I do it's just becomes a little redundant.

"That's boring" she groans trying to peel my shirt off again.

"Serena" I stay sternly. She stops and pulls pack, annoyance prominent on her face. "How was your day?"

"Fine" she mumbles.

Great now she's mad.

"What dress are you thinking about for homecoming?"

Homecomings a couple months away but she always has her dress picked out weeks in advance. A smile forms on her face as she dives into detail about her dress and the amount of cleavage it shows.

She then talks about the latest drama that I could care less about. I nod and say mhm randomly pretending I'm actually hearing what she was saying (although either way I don't think she would care).

Instead I'm thinking about the lake this past summer. Most weekends I would either come here with my friends or family, and my family I mean my family and the Gardners of course.

I think about water fights with Connor, Grayson, Theo and Marlee or Theo and I throwing Marlee off the dock while she was "tanning" (she was really just sleeping).

We head back to my truck soon later after Serena got annoyed with the mosquitos. You think she would be used to it by now since she's lived in Georgia for years.

We end up at her house in her extremely large room with a canopy bed and a bunch of shopping bags all around. I'm laying in her bed as she drones on about every detail of her new car.

I get a text from mom saying I need to head home. She never really cares about curfews unless I'm with Serena, she isn't the biggest fan or her and Serena is completely oblivious.

"I got to go" I sit up grabbing my shirt from the floor and put my clothes on.

"One more round?" She pouts sticking out her bottom lip.

"Sorry no can do, I'll see you tomorrow" kissing her lips quickly I leave her room.

Once I get home I notice most of the lights are off. Tonight's Tuesday meaning mom has to work and dad has to wake up earlier tomorrow to do paperwork at the factory so he's already asleep.

I walk in and see Connor in the living room playing video games and on FaceTime with Grayson who's presumingly playing the same game.

"How was Serena's?" Connor asks not looking away from the screen. He's hunched over with his phone propped on the coffee table so Gray can see him.

"Ew the she-devil" Grayson grimaces. I sit down on the couch with a grunt.

"I'm going to kill Marlee" I mutter annoyed with the nick name she made up.

"She'd probably kill you before you could kill her" Connor comments. Grayson laughs and I slap my brothers head.

"Is Ella sleeping?"

"Like a baby" Connor tells me killing another person on the game.

"She is a baby idiot" I mumble just as I hear yelling from Graysons phone. My heart drops and I grab the phone. Connor pauses his game and scoots closing with the same worried look. "What's going on?"

"Theo! I could kill you! That was my last cookie! You are so dead!" I hear Marlee screaming calming me down knowing it wasn't serious. Connor and I chuckle and I feel kinda stupid for overreacting.

Bad things had happened to the Gardners over the part few years, it was as if it followed them around.

"Grayson!" I can hear Marlee scream and a door open. "I need to borrow your bat" she tells him. I she her in the screen with a angry look, her hair in a bun and a hoodie on.

"Why?"

"Theo took my other one and I need to kill him" she explains as if it was casual. I chuckle and her head shoots to the phone. "What are you laughing at?! This is serious! My last cookie!"

I laugh even harder and she just flips me off before leaving the screen. I see her a few seconds later with a bat in hand.

"You're not actually going to kill him right?"

She wouldn't, maybe she would. You never know with Marlee. The girls got issues but that's why she's my best friend... sometimes.

"I feel like you guys aren't understanding me" she huffs. "I have no more cookies."

"So you're gonna go to jail for a couple cookies?" Grayson asks his sister with a dumbfounded look.

"Of course not" she waves him off. "I know how to get away with murder. It's easy"

"It's easy" Connor echos.

I think we're all questioning Mars sanity right now.

"Yeah, I've had it all planned out for years. Besides even if I do get caught I look hot in orange"

"Mar, I'm sorry. Please don't murder me. I'm too sexy to die" Theo pleads walking into Grays room she ignores him holding up the bat. "I brought you sweet tea"

She freezes bring it down to her side slowly and grabs the sweet tea. "I guess I'll save my murder plan for another time"

"Remind me not to cross you" Connor shakes his head laughing.

"Try living with her" Grayson shakes his head.

I chuckle while Grayson kicks the twins out of his room so him and Connor can play their game. I tell him goodnight before heading to my room.

After taking a shower I plop onto my bed pulling out my phone. I go onto snap where Serena sent me a goodnight snap with a pretty filter on. Theo has snapped me a video from earlier that night.

He was eating Mars cookies and she walked in as he finished the last one. There was fear in his eyes and the video shuts off. I laugh again opening a couple snaps from Miles about school and Asher about some girl he thinks it hot.

Just as I'm about to click off my phone Mar snaps me 3 times. I open them and see 3 pictures of her with hideous filters on. One making her look like an old man, one making her face stretch and the last one was where her nose grew 3 times bigger.

I screenshot them and not even 20 seconds later she's face timing me. I answer and see her in bed, the only light coming from her laptop. He long lashes flutter a few times letting me know she's tired.

Freckles scatter across her cheeks. Her lips are pink and plump. Her blonde wavy hair falls into her face but she quickly brushes it back and glares at me.

"Why did you screenshot those pictures?"

"Blackmail" I reply with a evil smirk.

"Delete them"

"I don't think I will"

"Now"

"No way Lee"

"I hate you"

"I love you too" I tease her enjoying the more annoyed she gets. "Sweet dreams"

"They'll only be sweet if I get to push you off a cliff in them" she retorts yawning again.

"At least you'd be dreaming about me"

She hangs up and my screen goes to my home screen. I shut my phone off and place it on the charger before flicking my lights off and getting comfortable in bed before sleep soon overtakes me.

"Cameron honey, wake up. It's time for school." Ma shakes me lightly. I run my eyes opening them. Moms brown hair was tied up in a neat bun. She was wearing a black pencil skirt with a white blouse and a pair of heels.

"Morning Ma" I say, my voice raspy from sleep. She kisses my cheek before standing up off my bed.

"Good morning sweetie, I got to head out. Will you wake up Connor?"

"Yeah, see you in a bit"

She waved before leaving my room. I sit up stretching out my arms. Standing up I throw a pillow that fell onto the floor back on my bed and leave my room. I go across the hall to Connors room.

"Wake up doofus" I shout flicking his light on. He shoves the blanket over his face and flips me off. I grab a pillow off of his bed and whack him with it. "Come on, we got school"

"Screw school"

"Don't let Ma hear you say that"

Once I make sure he's awake I go back to my room getting dressed and grabbing my phone. Walking down stairs I reply to Serena's text about meeting under the stairwell during lunch.

I quickly pop some toast into the toaster and drink some apple juice out of the carton when I hear Connor stumble down the stairs. He walks into the kitchen with a hood over his head.

"You look like shit" I chuckle hitting the back of his head.

"Thanks" he mutters grabbing a pop tart from the cabinet. My toast pops up and I quickly grab it wrapping it in a paper towel.

"What time did you go to bed?"

"Like 4" he replies. "Gray and I we're playing. Then Mar came and yelled at us to go to sleep."

"Sounds like her" I chuckle taking a large bite of my toast.

When we pull up at the Gardner residence Theo and Grayson come running out of the door. Grayson looks just as tired as Connor and Theo is his usual hyper self.

"Morning" Theo chirps swinging into the truck bed. Connor moves to the back to the trunk with Grayson and Theo. I honk twice and soon after Marlee comes walking out of the door. The scowl on her face let's me know she's not in a good mood.

Her hair is in a ponytail. She's wearing Jean shorts to go with the hot Georgia September weather. She has a old band shirt tucked into it. She has her backpack hanging off of one shoulder.

I spot the light makeup on her face consisting of mascara and lipstick. She stalks over to the truck and opens the door sliding in next to me.

"Mornin' sunshine" I give her a charming smile but unlike most girls she just looks at me with a straight face.

"Shut up"

But then again, Marlee is nothing like all the other girls in this town.

"What's got your panties in a twist today?" I ask starting the car and pulling into the road passing some kids riding their bikes.

"Those dumbasses back there woke me up at 4 freaking am playing their stupid games and I couldn't go back to sleep" she complains propping her feet up on the dashboard.

"Awe, poor baby" I coos pinching her cheek but keeping my eyes on the road.

"You know what, I don't think I'll give you your picture now" she protest and that's when I notice the painting in her hand just as I pull into school.

"'No! I'm sorry, I'll punch the idiots for you if you want" I offer turning off the car. She seems to be deep in thought for a minute before sighing and handing it to me.

I flip it over and my jaw practically drops to the ground. It was breath taking, it looked so real as if it was the actual picture.

"You like it?" She questions her crystal blue eyes meeting mine, I see a hint of nerves behind them.

"Are you kidding? I love it!" I exclaim opening the glove compartment and placing it into there.

"Good because you weren't getting another one" she says before hoping out of the car and walking into the school. The boys were all already long gone.

I jog to catch up to her ignoring the weird glances. "Lee wait!" I huff out of breath when I reach her.

"Aren't you on the baseball team! Shouldn't you be in shape?" She teases, her mood slowly starting to brighten.

"We're not in season right now, I get to be lazy." I scoff shoving her arm. "Anyways I was trying to say thank you"

"Whatever" she shrugs punching my arm and laughing lightly. A group of football guys walk past us laughing and pointing Mar out. I tense up and her face drops.

"Hey Marlee!" One of them calls, she looks at them with a blank expression. "How much for a bj, 20 bucks?" He holds up a 20 dollar Bill and his friends snicker behind him. I step forward to defend her but she grabs my bicep.

"Only if you bring the microscope so I could actually see it" she replies. The guys jaw drops and all his friends stop laughing. She spins around and starts to walk down the hall. I go up to them, towering over the guy.

"Say anything about her again and no one will be able to recognize you, not that that's a bad thing" I shove his shoulder and follow after Mar who's walking down the hall. "You okay?" I ask wrapping an arm around her shoulder.

"Why wouldn't I be?" She asks getting to her locker. She grabs a binder out of it and placed her lunch and diabetic bag inside of it.

"You know why"

Marlees always been too stubborn for her own good. She never lets anyone know when something gets to her but I can see it in her eyes that it does.

Every little dumb comment from a kid who doesn't know the story. Every note thrown at her. Every whisper or laugh when she walks by.

The people in this town labeled her something that she was far from. Rumors spread so fast before I could stop them. I want more than anything to protect her from all of it.

To shield her. Keep her the hopeful, happy girl she was 2 years ago. If I did do that she would punch me in the face... again.

That's how she is, it's how she's always been. She always wants to face all her problems herself, no help from anyone.

It's extremely annoying.

A couple hours later I walk into art class. Our teacher stands at her desk typing on her computer. Walking straight towards the desk where Marlee sits leaned over, her blonde locks in her face as she scribbles onto a paper I sling my backpack down.

"Hey" I say sitting down next to her. She mumbles a reply not looking up. After a minute the teacher starts talking so she sets her pencil down and brushes a piece of hair out of her face.

That's when I notice the slight shake in her hand. I quickly grab her chin making her face me. I spot the paleness in her face and dilated pupils. Cursing under my breath I grab her hand and pull her up.

"What are you doing?" She asks with a harsh tone.

"You're low, come on" I tell her pulling her to the front of the class. I talk to the teacher who understands and lets us both leave.

"Cameron, I am perfectly fine. I can check it after class." She protest but I just wrap an arm around her when I feel her stumble and take her to the lockers.

"No you're not" I argue opening her locker and grabbing her bag. I prick her finger reading the extremely low number. "Shit"

"How low?"

"Low" I realize I don't have any juice and when I check her lunchbox and realize nothing has enough sugar to get her numbers up fast enough. I try to think of an option when Mars voice snaps me out of it.

"Cam" her voice is low and raspy. She tilts and I quickly catch her. Her eyes flutter close and then back open.

"Let's go" I urge basically carrying her to Ma's room. Knocking on the door with one hand my other arm is wrapped firmly around her waist. "It'll be okay" I mutter kissing her forehead.

A random freshman opens the door and glances at me with fear. I push past him into the room spotting Connor and Grayson sitting at a table. Moms eyes widen and she stands up.

"Everyone, go ahead and start on your homework" mom instructs motioning us to her desk. I sit Mar down in the desk chair kneeling next to her and tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.

Grayson and Connor rush over both looking worried. Grayson grabs his sisters hand and Connor stands next to me.

"What happened?" Ma questions opening a desk drawer full of snacks for Mar when she's low. She hands her a juice box that she immediately starts drinking.

"She just got super low" I reply as she continues to drink her juice, the color slowly going back to her face.

"Did she eat breakfast?" Connor asks Grayson who shakes his head.

"I don't know, I overslept." He mutters. Marlee sits up a little and seems to snap out of her trance.

"Did you eat breakfast?" Connor asks her this time. She shakes her head no, her fingers go to the sunflower necklace I gave her when we were little.

She plays with the charms, a nervous habit.

"Why not?" Mom takes the empty juice from her hands and throws it in the trash placing a sympathetic hand on her cheek. "Darling is this because of Ev-"

"No" her entire body stiffens. "I just didn't have time"

"Did you at least check your sugar today?" I question feeling my frustration grow. Her face gives me the answer. I pace slightly running my hand through my hair.

"It's not that big of a deal, I just forgot" she stands up quickly after me but stumbles slightly. I catch her lowering her back into the chair.

"We got to get to class" Connor tells us. Him and Grayson both hug Marlee before heading out of the class. Ma stands in the hall like she always does during class change.

My worry for her bubbles into frustration. "Forgot?! You just forgot?!"

The entire classroom is empty besides me and a very angry Marlee.

"Yeah!" She rolls her eyes.

"You can't keep doing this to yourself Marlee" I run a hand down my face.

"I'm not doing anything!"

"You don't care! You don't care about your health at all!" I don't mean to yell at her but all the anger and frustration from the past few months can't help but come out.

"I do care" she tries stand up again. I step forward trying to help her but she puts her hands in front of her.

"That's not true and we both know it" I look her straight in the eye. "Ever since last year you've been different and I get why. I do but why won't you let anyone help you"

"I don't need help"

"You do and I'm sick of everyone pretending everything's fine. I miss my best friend, I miss the old you" my voice lightens and I grab her hand. Her eyes meet mine before looking away.

"I do too" she says softly pulling her hand back. "But she's not coming back"

And with that she leaves the room letting my immediately fill with guilt as I watch her was down the hall.