I'm nervous.

My stomach is acting up, that's the amount of nervous I am. But mom made me a relaxing tea for me to get better.

Or at least get trough the day.

As promised, I took Ashley on a wolf date on Saturday right after lunch. We drove to the far edge of the city, near the open fields of grass and vegetation.

I knew we'd be alone there. Not that wolves in this town are a menace. At this point, not even the animals fear us much. Though there can be an occasional rogue or two, but our borders are well defended by the warriors. So, it's not a concern of mine.

We ran for quite some time in our wolf forms, free and wild. I forgot how much fun it is to be in my wolf form.

It's weird in the first few times after we first shift at puberty. Though my 12 years old self was too excited at the prospect. I loved running as a young boy. I still do.

But now with Ashley is a new height of pleasure. It's a true delight. We stopped when we reached the edge of the river, just like Simon, who's putting me to shame with his multiple dates with the omega.

We shifted back into human form and I gazed upon my future mate's beautiful body. She smiled bashfully at me, blushing at my piercing gaze.

But I couldn't look away.

My eyes glowed with desire for her. It can't be helped. I'd love to take her right now and make her mine. But I take a cold bath instead.

And by cold, I mean freezing. It's winter, so the water is gelid. That calmed me right away. She went in with me, so that's nice.

"I know you're nervous about tomorrow." - She started, grabbing my attention.

We're sitting on the grass, admiring each other's physical form. There's such peace here, it's lovely to be one with nature.

"But I need you to know: whatever happens, I had a blast. Honestly, I couldn't have asked for a better boyfriend. A better partner trough high school. And I will always love you." - She declared, making my heart swell with joy.

A radiant smile took over me as I gazed upon her.

"Thank you for saying that. I feel the same. I know I put too much pressure on us because of my mating. And that's precisely why I'm so nervous about it. But I need you to know whoever it is, she won't hold a candle to you. And though I can't reject her, I'll always love you." - I replied in a sincere tone.

She smiled wide at me. Tears come to my eyes. I'm overwhelmed with emotions that I've been bottling up and now I can't anymore.

There's a dreadful fear in me she won't be the one. No matter how hard I want her to be. It's hell that I can't pick my own mate. My own Luna. But it's NOT gonna be me that will change thousands of years old tradition.

Ash holds me close for the longest time while my tears flowed continuously. My body shakes in fear of the unknown. And I'm just relieved no one else is here to witness me crashing like this.

"Even if you weren't Alpha, I'd never want you to reject your mate. Not ever. I can't ask you to be miserable for the rest of your life. And making me guilty for it. As I can't reject my mate either." - Ash told me with a comforting tone, while still holding me.

Funny thing about mates. You can reject them. We all know that by now. You shouldn't, but you can. Anyone, really. No one can force you to accept a mate. And I mean no one on Earth.

Except for me.

I can't reject my mate. No. Nada. Under any circumstances, I simply cannot reject my own mate. No matter what she looks like - not that I'm that shallow to reject someone for her appearance.

And the reason for that is very simple.

Even if the pack could get on board with me running it alone, which never happened before. Not in the last 150 years of our existence.

Even so, we are a dynasty. All werewolf packs are. The biggest, most traditional ones at least.

That means that when I become Alpha, I'm expected to produce an heir. At least one. Someone needs to continue our line. My bloodline. The Hollingsworth Alphas.

That's what was expected of my dad. And what he expects of me. It's tradition and archaic, but it's the way that it is.

So yeah, I do need a Luna. Not that I'd reject my mate if I weren't Alpha either. But that option certainly isn't available to me.

And the pack would NEVER accept a child produced outside of the mate bond. Specially not from their own Alpha. It would be almost unholy to even suggest it.

After I stopped crying, Ash and I shifted into wolves and ran back to my car. It also gave me time to enjoy my run with her. Seeing her in the purest form, as wolf, was exhilarating.

I hope to Goddess she's the one. And I can't wait to start my life with her.

After I dropped Ash off at her house, I got back home for a hot shower and dinner. My parents are thrilled for tomorrow. They know how big of a deal it is for me, for the pack.

Like they say, it's a werewolf's biggest milestone.

I had a lot of trouble sleeping. I couldn't rest my brain wondering a million different scenarios for tomorrow. There are so many possible combinations of girls within mating age to me that is mind boggling.

And I'm just talking about girls in my school. College girls are coming too. Literally, all girls within my range are. It's a good thing it's winter break for most schools.

And thank Goddess we don't have school for two weeks. I'm gonna spend them...

"Morning, Alpha! Are you ready for your dream to come true?" - Simon snapped me out of my thoughts on Sunday morning after breakfast. Inside my room, he entered without knocking, as usual.

"Yes, I'm so ready! I was just thinking about what I'm gonna do with Ash once we find out." - I replied enthusiastically.

"Yeah, I can smell that. Gross!" - He said with a disgusted look on his face. I glared at him.

When aroused, individuals emanate certain pheromones and scents that are unnoticeable by humans. But our powerful noses catch it easily. Though sometimes, I'd prefer if we didn't.

It's also why we can scent when someone is afraid. The stench is distinguishable.

"Hypocrite! You spend half your time with the omega talking about Tuesday!" - I accused him in an irritated voice.

"That's because he's so hot. I never thought I'd bottom for anyone. But for him, I did it gladly." - He admitted, though I didn't ask.

"Well, better you than him. At least you can't get pregnant." - I mumbled, slightly uncomfortable but very relieved. I can't have my Beta blocked.

"Tell me about it! Dad said that if he got a call about me for the same reason you called him about Blackburn, he'd die." - He spoke in a grim tone.

"Okay, I don't know what prompted this line of conversation. But no sad themes on my birthday. Today is all about happiness and my mate." - I redirected the conversation. I can't be brooding on my special day.

"It's not your birthday yet, my friend. But I agree with you. Did you take Ash on a wolf date yesterday?" - He asked in a good mood.

We talked for an hour inside my room. I love this. Talking to him alone, unfiltered and unbothered. Granted, some topics make me a little uncomfortable. Specially when he keeps referencing his time with the omega.

Nevertheless, I try to empathize and be happy for him. I can't be unsupportive now. Plus, he hears about my time with Ash, so it's only fair that I do the same for him.

We have lunch together with my family like we do every other Sunday. It's the best.

"In two months it's gonna be you, Beta. Are you excited?" - Dad asked Simon, who grinned.

"I am, Alpha. But also very nervous about being mated away from Elliott, I can't lie." - He replied in a concerned tone.

"I'm sure it'll be fine. But the Goddess has double the options with you than she has for my son. So, there're a lot of options." - Dad snickered, referencing his bisexuality.

We all laughed at this, including Simon.

"It's true, Alpha. But I do hope I don't get mated to any guy except for Elliott. I want a family too." - He said after a minute.

I notice the fear in his eyes. If he gets mated to a guy who isn't an omega he can't have children. And though he can adopt, it's very rare for wolf children to become available. And humans are out of the question.

"I understand, Beta. I'm rooting for you." - Dad said in a sympathetic tone.

Silence fell afterwards. We finished lunch, my siblings and I clear the table. Then, we go to the living room.

"What if your mate is already in college? Are you gonna ask her to drop out?" - Zach inquired me and I gasp at the insinuation.

"Of course not, Zach! This isn't the 1950's. I'll wait for her for as long as I have to. Jesus!" - I replied in an annoyed tone.

I could never ask someone to give up their education. My parents got mated in high school. But there're no limits for whom I can be paired with. Except for the 2 years age rule.

And no blood relatives. But that's a given. So, even if she's a sophomore in college I'll wait for her. I don't care what it takes.

"What if she's ugly?" - Jessica snickered.

I glared at her.

"Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Simon thinks the omega is handsome." - I teased, making him wince at the mention of his name.

"He is handsome!" - Jessica agreed too emphatically for my taste.

"Thanks, Jess. He really is." - Simon concurred, grinning wide. The mere mention of Elliott has him swooning. It's amazing how smitten he is. And shocking still.

Some time later, Simon returns home to get ready and we get to showering ourselves. It's gonna be a long night.

The entire pack house is beautifully decorated with various ornaments. There're also various pictures of me from the time when I was a baby till now, which is very embarrassing.

Because of the amount of guests tonight, several rooms were made available in the guest wing for the people who's visiting.

Though they were made aware that no one is allowed inside with you unless it's your mate. It's not a hotel, it's a family place.

Because of the huge volume of people, outside the pack house was decorated as well for the countdown to my birthday. At this point, I need to be in the same place with all the guests so I can scent my mate.

But they can't all fit into one single space, so it'll happen outside. But it's fine. I already expected it. Traditions, am I right?

My family is well dressed, the waiters are ready, the music is ambient. And I'm good to go.

Soon enough, students start flooding our house with gifts in hand for their future Alpha. I greet everyone, as I must.

But my smile is reserved for a dazzling gorgeous girl in a red strapless dress that had me spinning.

"My Goddess, Luna. You're gorgeous!" - I greeted her with a radiant smile. My mom frowns at this. Not because she doesn't like her, it's that my mom IS the Luna.

Ash greeted my parents and siblings, bowing her head to my dad. It's customary to bow your head to the Alpha of the pack when you meet him. Of any pack everywhere.

Traditions, am I right?

Simon arrives with his omega. He hugged me and Elliott bowed his head to my dad as well, greeting my family and me.

"Wow! This place is packed!" - Simon commented as he saw students crawling from everywhere inside the pack house.

"Yeah, even Ben is here. Not that I'd disinvite him." - I replied in an awkward tone.

Simon and Elliot laughed uncomfortably. They go roam the place, greeting their friends.

Most of the omegas from the club are here too, anyone within mating age to me. Stupid rule, but I don't mind their presence. The house is so packed that I can't even smell them here. Ash greets our friends as well. We're the 'it' couple.

It's the noisiest this house has ever gotten. Food is served. Non alcoholic beverages are poured. Music is somewhat loud. And the hours are going by fast.

I got so many presents it'll take an entire week for me to unwrap them.

"Hey, Liv. Can you imagine the gag if you got mated to the Alpha? I'd pay to see his face if it happens." - Elliot suggested to her friend, making both Ash and I grimace.

"If your friend is not gonna respect me at my own house, I'll have him escorted out of here by the warriors." - I told Simon with a menacing tone. Warriors guard the pack house at all hours of the day, but tonight there're extra bodies.

Simon's facing me, the omegas are circled to our backs but near us enough to hear me even with all the chatter.

Liv and the omegas scowled at my words. But I'm not kidding. I won't be disrespected in my own house. Specially on my birthday.

"I was joking, Hollingsworth!" - Elliott turned to me when he said that, looking guilty.

"Well, I'm not. If you're not gonna respect me in my own house, you can leave. I'm sorry, Simon. There's only so much I can take!" - I replied in an irritated tone, turning to gaze at a worried Simon.

"I'm sorry, Hollingsworth. I meant no offense. It really was just a joke. It's nauseatingly obvious your mate is Ashley." - Elliott told me, shocking all of us. I don't remember him ever apologizing to anyone, much less me. I'm gobsmacked.

"Thank you for saying that. I know it doesn't come easy to you." - I appreciated the gesture. I'm not so conceited that I can't recognize an olive branch.

"You're welcome. You should enjoy that. Because it'll be the last time I'll apologize to you." - He smirked, to no one's surprise.

My dad stopped the music.

"Guests, it's 11:30 p.m. Please direct yourselves outside for the birthday countdown."

Hundreds of boys and girls start walking outside the house. I grab Ashley's arm to accompany her. The front of the house is crowded with teenagers and college students, eagerly awaiting for my birthday.

Though most of the college students got mated already at my party. Those who weren't till tonight, of course. Those who are weren't even invited. Too many people.

It's the thing with mates: as soon as you're legal to scent them, your eyes turn bright.

"Please join me and my mate in raising your glasses to my son, the future Alpha of the Regency Falls pack. May his mating be fruitful and blessed." - Dad toasted, raising his champagne glass high to commemorate the occasion.

All the guests raised their glasses, as sparkling cider was being distributed around the place.

"10... 9... 8..."

"I love you, Ashley Williams! I have always loved and always will." - I said, gazing upon her with loving eyes.

"7... 6... 5..."

"I love you too, Felix Hollingsworth. I'll always love you." - She replied with a smile so infectious, I had to kiss her.

"4... 3... 2... 1..."

We parted lips. But even before that, I could feel it wouldn't be her. Tears come to our eyes.

"Happy Birthday, Felix!" - Dad yelled from his place at the front of the house. Mom was with him cheering me on.

Simon came to hug me and wish me a happy birthday. He saw that my eyes aren't glowing. So he comforted me as well.

"I'm sorry, my friend. I'm so sorry!" - He looked devastated for me. Though not nearly as I was.

But I don't have time for that. I have to make my rounds. I'm greeted by everyone. Hoards of students shaking my hand, hugging, kissing me. Some feeling disappointed they're not my mate, others relieved. But no glowing eyes whatsoever.

I'm at the end of the street and still nothing.

How is this possible? I've invited everyone who could be my mate. And I do mean everybody.

"Where's your mate?" - Andersen joked as I walked towards my parents.

I quietly glared at him. He's uncomfortable at my death stare.

"Mom, who didn't come? Was anybody sick or something?" - I asked her once I got to where my parents were. My siblings were mingling with their friends in the crowd.

"No, honey. No one would miss your birthday." - She replied in a worried tone. Dad's concerned too.

"Maybe she's from a different --"

"No!" - A loud scream was heard from the crowd. It startled everyone and interrupted my dad.

I recognize the voice. I've heard it all my life. I sprinted towards Simon, who seemed very distraught.

I got so distracted pursuing him, that I didn't even realize my eyes are glowing the brightest they've ever shone. I got confused, but persisted on my way to him.

When I got to where he was, I could see why. He's staring at Elliot's glowing eyes. He's in tears. My world has stood still. I'm beyond gobsmacked. Everyone is.

"MATE!" - I said with a deep husky voice.

"MATE!" - Elliott repeated back to me.