《Salty Book Review》Review #7
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This was long overdue but thank you for being patient. asked for a brutally honest review so this will be as raw as I can make it while also being constructive.
Your title is attention-grabbing which is rare for a Wattpad story. It reminds me of a Netflix horror movie - kinda like the Haunting of Hill House; very original and curiosity-inducing, so kudos for that.
10/10
Fantasy doesn't seem to fit this story. It feels more like a horror story or a general fiction because when I hear fantasy, I think of fairies and magic. Then again I couldn't get past the first page because of how ridiculously boring it was so for all I know, you probably have elves roaming the halls.
4/10
Your blurb is too wordy. It's almost as if you tried your hardest to find college-level synonyms for every word possible which can easily cause someone to glaze over your book. Keep it simple: Two polar opposite friends decide to find an ancient silent soul. In doing so, they find themselves caught in the whirlpool of unfortunate events.
4/10
I didn't even understand what was happening so if characters were introduced, I missed it.
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Nothing new to add since the same thing applies to here.
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I felt like I was in a silent film – like everyone was speaking but I couldn't understand it. Some people use very little descriptive qualities in their books and some are so poetic that you feel trapped in the pages. This one was overboard. Again, it feels like you're trying too hard. I mean, at times it was perfectly written but for the most part, the page is smothered in Shakespearean level writing. Writing should flow easily like pouring water with a steady hand. Passage by passage, read over it and edit it so it's as simple as possible. Otherwise, you'll have readers falling off before they enter Chapter 2.
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5/10
(Connection to the book) At times, it felt as if I was a prisoner locked in a dungeon. It was a good, medieval reading experience. Aside from those good qualities, I also felt tired after three paragraphs. I already explained my thoughts so I won't press any further on that.
Thank you for sending me your book! I look forward to reading another one of your works and recommend me to your friends if you're pleased with this review.
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