《Being Human》25. The Test
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Rain water drips from a hole in the ceiling, crudely mended with a few planks nailed into it, into a pot. Lion is napping nearby while Y/n stroked his mane. He was with Steven and the Crystal Gems are playing a board game.
"Ooh hoo! You've got freezer burn, Pearl! Looks like you lose all your fish sticks." Steven laughs.
"What? I needed those for my bachelor meal combo. Now I can't ring the dinner bell." Pearl complains and pulls out a very long list of game rules and reads it. "These rules make no sense." She says to herself.
"The game of "Citchen Calamity" may be played for fun, but the hunger is real!" Steven says seriously.
Amethyst starts laughing. "Tough break, Pearl." She picks up a game card and reads it. "The sponge in your sink is covered in mold." But I can still eat it, right?"
"No, no, that means that you lose two turns." Steven tells her.
"That's baloney!" Amethyst cries.
Pearl who was still reading the rules list, looks at Amethyst in surprise. "What? You have a "bologna" card?"
"You're turn Y/n!" Steven cheers and Y/n removes his hand form Lion's mane to pick up a card.
"You're staff have rebelled in the kitchen, lose a turn." Y/n says reading the card and he sighs. "Never should have hired cheap." He chuckles and jokes to himself.
"Garnet, your move." Steven says.
Garnet picks up a different game card and reads it. "I'm now the owner of the "Golden Can Opener... Yesssss." Garnet says.
"Now you can check your soups for the alphabet bonus." Steven tells her.
"Who wrote this game?" Pearl asks still confused.
"My turn!" Steven cheers as he reads another game card and gasps. "I've gotta roll the dice to escape the eggquake!" H presses the game blender which rolls game dices. "C'mon, papa needs a new skillet! "
The dices emerge from underneath the blender, both displaying an "egg" face.
"Yeah! Double sunnies! I did it!" Stevenm cheers and he moves his player piece across the game board. "I win! Yeah! This Citchen Calamity has been cleaned up! Woohoo!" He laughs.
"I don't get it, but nice job." Amethyst starts clapping.
"Yes, well done." Pearl starts to clap as well. "That was very, very complicated."
"Nice game little man." Y/n says.
"Well played." Garnet pets Steven.
Steven giggles and blushes. "So, what do you want to play next?" Steven asks as he walks to a closet.
"There are more?" Pearl asks surprised.
"Steven looks through the closet. "Oh sure. I got "Polly Polly", "Toppler", "Conquerors of Eldermore", "Not That Sorry", "Don't Wake Father Figure", and "Non-Invasive Operation". I think that one's missing a couple organs. I also have checkers, if you want to take tur.." The Moon Goddess Statue rolls out of the closet. "The Sea Spire statue..."
"Oh wow, now that's a throwback..." Y/n says surprised to see it.
Amethyst scoffs and laughs. "Oh, so that's where you left it." Pearl looks at her annoyed.
"I... forgot I still had this." Steven picks it up and looks at it in guilt. "I... I'm really sorry I forgot it on our mission that time."
"Oh, Steven." Pearl says.
"If I had just remembered to pack it, then maybe the Sea Spire would still be around. But now it's gone forever, 'cause of me." Steven says feeling guilty.
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"Well yeah, but... Don't worry about it, 'kay?" Amethyst says to him
"You did your best on that mission, and that's what counts." Garnet adds.
"But the Sea Spire. It was a special, important, Gem... place!" Steven starts to say.
Pearl walks to Steven and kneels down. "Oh, Steven, no, no, no. If the Spire had been crucial, we wouldn't have used it as a test for you. It's fine, really."
"Test?" Steven repeats sceptical. "What do you mean, "test"?"
Garnet and Amethyst glance at each other, and Pearl gets worried. Thunder is heard outside.
" Uhh... Well it wasn't really a "test", per se. Not in the traditional sense. We just wanted to see if you were ready to go on missions and you brought Y/n along without asking if I may remind you." Pearl says
"Um...That's exactly what a test is..." Y/n points out.
Pearl gets nervous. "Euuuugghhhhh..."
"Steven, it wasn't something we planned behind your back." Garnet says now. "We just saw an opportunity and..."
Steven gasps. "And I failed it... I failed the test."
"No way, you got at least a 50%."
"Oh, and you had that raft so we didn't have to swim home, that's a solid 75, not failing at all! Besides, that Spire was in much worse shape than we thought. It should have been even easier." Pearl comments.
"I failed an easy test?!" Steven cries.
Amethyst glares at Pearl, unimpressed. "Nice one."
Garnet gets up and groans at Pearl. "Hmmm!"
"That's not what I meant! I..." Pearl stammers.
"No. We need another test! A hard one! One Y/n can properly be included in this time." Steven says getting excited.
Pearl exchanges glares with Amethyst. "But Steven you and Y/n. You've come so far..."
"Let us prove it." Steven says as he gets hyped. "Test us! Test us!"
Pearl and Amethyst look at Garnet.
The Crystal Gems stand before the Temple Gate.
"Alright, Y/n, Steven." Pearl says getting their attentions. "We've adjusted the metaphysical properties of the temple to create a customized dungeon for you." She projects a hologram of the dungeon. "Now, just beyond here are three chambers designed by each of us to simulate the challenges of a mission. Should you succeed, you will unlock the final door, where we will be waiting for you."
"Alright! That's more like it!" Steven says determined
Garnet places her hand on Steven and Y/n's shoulders. "This won't be easy you two. Be careful in there."
Y/n just nods.
"I won't let you down this time." Steven says.
"That's the spirit!" Pearl encourages.
"Yeaaah! Get amped!" Amethyst cheers.
"You ready?" Y/n asks Steven.
Steven nods. "I'm ready."
The Gems open the Temple Gate and both Y/n and Steven walk into a dark hallway.
"Good luck!" Amethyst calls out to the two. "You're gonna need ittttt!"
The Temple Gate closes, separating Y/n and Steven from the Gems and leaving them in the darkness.
Purple torches then lit up, dispelling the darkness, and reveals a long stone ramp with deep pits on both sides before the pair.
"Num-ero uno. I wonder if Amethyst made this one." Steven says to Y/n.
Bars suddenly raise and block the entrance behind Y/n and Steven, and the two look up and see an Amethyst statue at the top of the ramp.
"Yeah, Definitely Amethyst..." Y/n comments.
Steven goes first as he walks across the ramp, when a giant boulder emerges from the mouth of the Amethyst statue and rolls towards Y/n and Steven.
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"Time to run!" Y/n says as he and Steven start running away from the approaching boulder, and sees a door on a ledge across a gaping pit.
"The door!" Steven cries.
"There's a rope over the gap." Y/n notices.
Steven leaps off the ramp first with Y/n following and the two grab onto a vine hanging above the pit. The giant boulder barely misses them as he swings across the pit and over to the ledge, and touches the door. The door then starts to foam out towards Y/n and Steven.
"Whoa?" Steven backs off a bit into Y/n, but Y/n remembers the pit behind them
"Dead end." Y/n says.
"Uh-oh! Uhh..." Steven stammers
The door however pops, releasing star-shaped balloons and confetti, as a fanfare plays.
"Oh." Steven chuckles as Y/n lets out a sigh of relief. "Yeah!" Steven laughs.
Steven and Y/n walk through the door into the second chamber. As they walk through the door bars block the entrance behind the two again, Steven sees a door high up on the wall across the room.
"How do we get up there?" Steven wonders.
A short music score starts to play, and certain tiles on the floor glow to each note.
"Huh?" Steven hums.
The music score plays again, and another series of tiles glows this time.
"It looks like a music puzzle." Y/n comments.
"Must be Pearl's room. Only she would make us think." Steven says and Y/n nods in agreement. "Okay, let's see. Ummm..." He steps on a tile. "Bing." He jumps to another with Y/n following in his footsteps. "Bing." Steven jumps to the last two. "Bing, bing. ...Did that do it?" He asks Y/n.
A chime is heard and the tiles in front of Steven and Y/n raise, forming stairs to the door.
Steven laughs and climbs the stairs with Y/n following behind.
"Huh that was easier than I expected..." Y/n hums.
A pendulum blade suddenly swings past behind Steven. "Not easy! Aaaaah!" Steven cries.
Steven quickly runs up the stairs, avoiding several pendulum blades.
Y/n darts through the swinging blades himself and only barely dodges the last pendulum blade as he reaches the door. The door then bursts into star-shaped balloons and confetti while the fanfare plays again.
"Woo-hoooo! That was close." Steven says panting.
"That was... really close." Y/n says rubbing his neck. "You want to keep going, Or do you want to take a break?" Y/n asks.
Steven shakes his head. "I'm okay."
The two step into the final chamber and bars once again block the entrance. Smoke emanates from Steven's flip-flops and Y/n's trainers as they sizzle on the hot floor.
"Alright, let's see what we've got."
Steven can see a door straight ahead, separated by a lava pit, connected by a narrow bridge between them. A wall of fire then shoots up from one of the cracks in the bridge.
"Looks like Garnet... turned up the heat." Steven says to Y/n and he chuckles at his own pun. "Nice one, Steven."
Steven starts to advance, when another fire wall shoots through another crack. He then avoid several other fire walls on the bridge, quickly reaching the other side. He starts walking confidently towards the door, when spikes suddenly fall from the ceiling above Steven.
"Steven look out!" Y/n shouts.
Steven looks up at the spikes. "Ah!" He cowers closing his eyes,
"What the..." Steven hears Y/n says and he opens his eyes to see the spikes stop short just above his head, before retracting back to the ceiling. Steven steps away from the spikes and they repeatedly pound hit the ground. Steven then sticks his arm out, the spikes stop just above his arm and retract again.
"What?" Steven asks baffled
Steven backs a bit more over a crack on the bridge, when it starts to glow. A fire wall then shoots up from the crack, but it goes around Steven. He then sticks his arm into the fire wall and finds that it is missing him on purpose.
"Oh no. It can't be true!" Steven looks at the door that leads out of the chamber, and at the door from the previous chamber, now opened, and ponders. "Come on Y/n, we're getting to the bottom of this."
Y/n and Steven had returned back to Pearl's room and Steven sticks his whole body at a pendulum blade. It swings by and Steven finds that it completely phases through him. "Whaaattt!?"
Y/n starts tapping two floor tiles together, finding it plays the same music score and activates the stairs. He then taps on just one tile, and the stairs still activate.
"It didn't even matter!?" Steven asks frustrated.
Y/n and Steven return back to Amethyst's chamber, Steven enters first forgetting about the pit in the room, but quickly finds himself standing on invisible ground over the pit. "This too!?"
Steven walks back to the ramp and the giant boulder starts rolling towards him again. He stands his ground as the boulder approaches, and it stops just in front him.
"Everything's riiiiigged!" Steven starts yelling as he walks up the ramp, pushing the ball back into the mouth of the Amethyst statue.
Y/n and Steven then finds him outside the test dungeon, standing atop a big rectangular prism over a black void. He sees all the fake traps as he walks around, examining the setup.
"I don't understand... Why would they set up these fake traps?" Y/n asks.
"I... can't believe it. Ugghhh! "It won't be easy. Good luck, you're gonna need it." How am I supposed to prove myself if you guys kee..."
Steven and Y/n suddenly hear the Gems talking and walks to the edge of the prism. He then see them standing at a platform, with a large bouquet of star-shaped balloons and a banner reading "Congratulations".
"What's taking them so long?" Amethyst asks.
"I didn't think mine was very difficult. Do you think Steven hurt himself?" Pearl asks.
"There's no way. It's impossible for them to fail." Garnet tells her.
"Ugggh. So what's the point?" Amethyst asks.
"The point is that they both have come so far. Y/n has been training in sword fighting with me and let's not forget how valuable in the trials. Steven can make Rose's bubble! And he's pulled out Rose's shield twice. But he's lost his healing powers. We have to give him another "success". He can't lose his confidence like that again." Pearl explains.
There is a brief silence between the Gems.
"...We're bad at this." Amethyst says.
"What?!" Pearl cries.
"Yeah! You can't control them, and they shouldn't be taking advice from me, and we don't have Rose to tell us what to do!" Amethyst says now.
"But Steven needs us to show him how to be a Gem! As for Y/n he is still a human who needs protecting." Pearl says.
"Steven is not just a Gem. There's never been anything or anyone like Steven. We don't know what he needs." Garnet interrupts. "Y/n may be a human, but he doesn't behave any we've encountered."
Steven looks at Y/n surprised by what the Gems said about the two of them.
"Oh man." Steven says.
"I guess, they really care about us." Y/n says fondly.
"Yeah..." Steven says.
"Come on, we'd better not keep them waiting." Y/n says with a smile.
The two then decide to reenter the test dungeon. They walk confidently through the three chambers, unfazed by the fake obstacles, towards the final door. They push it open to a dark doorway. A pathway lights up, and the Gems start clapping as fireworks set up upon Steven and Y/n's arrival.
"Congratulations." Garnet comments.
"Congratulations, Y/n and Steven!" Pearl joins in.
"Yeaaah, congrats dudes! Woop, woop, woop! Woop." Amethyst cheers
Steven, looking down, walks up to the Gems and kneel down before them.
"Thank goodness you made it!" Pearl cries. "How did it... go?" She asks the two.
Steven looks down seemingly angry. "I can't believe you guys. That was so..." He looks up happily. "...insane!"
The Gems look at each other in relief.
"Where do I even begin? Man, you should have seen us. That boulder was coming at us and we just jumped for it. And then the tiles were going like "Bing, bong, bing" and I was like "I see what's going on here". And I thought there's no way we could have been ready for all that fire and lava and spikes but we did it! We really... did it. I... You guys are the best. Thank you so much for doing this for me. This was just what I needed."
"Oh, Steven." Pearl says happily.
"Aw, shucks, guy." Amethyst
"Mmmm." Garnet nods.
The Gems all step forth one by one to hug Steven together.
"I'm so proud of you both." Pearl says.
"Yeah, you da men!" Amethyst adds.
"I knew you could do it." Garnet comments.
Steven and Y/n just smile at one another and embraces the Gems tightly.
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