Matthew

By now days had once more turned into weeks, and life had become as normal as it could be. Though there was an aching feeling of tension between the three of us, more so himself and I.

The lifeless stares I would receive, even though he told me time and time again he had accepted my apology. He would never look me in the eye for longer than a few moments, constantly moving his gaze to the person next to me. Or rather not moving his gaze from the floor.

Sometimes he's avoiding contact with me as a whole, preferring to go to the bathroom the very moment after Faye left. Even after uttering the words "I'm not mad at you, why would I be."

He knew very well he had every right to be upset, but it would make him seem quite childish. And the question would arise as to why he was so bothered, him being in a relationship with me would've been 'wrong'. At least in the eyes of some.

Why risk it for a feeble apology, an apology that would only satisfy momentarily. So he rather pretend as though the harsh words I spouted never bothered him in the first place.

I stood in my bathroom looking at my bed head and the slight bag I had on my right eye, wondering how it came about. After a warm shower, I clothed myself and grabbed a bowl of cereal that I chomped down.

The same tunes that I had grown accustomed to hearing on the radio rang threw my ears, as the familiar turbulence shifted my body in the passenger seat. By the time I had arrived at school, I saw his car parked.

As if with an unperturbed attitude, I waved adieu to my mother. Though deep down a feverish churn turned my stomach out of itself, it had ever since the weird tension was brought about.

Soon after walking in, I was gifted with the site of the duo themselves. The slightly shorter one waving me down as the other stared at the floor.

Faye smiled, "Hey, dumb ass, I'm gonna go to some of my friends -"

Before she had the chance to finish I grasped my chest theatrically and gasping " I thought was your only friend. "

Her eyes rolled half back into their sockets before a middle finger graced my vision " Says the one who stopped playing football because the sheer amount of rancid smelling, hormonal teenage boys gave you a 'migraine'."

She stared at me as though I were stupid " I'm pretty sure I'm the more social out of the two of us."

"That doesn't prove anything, it just means that the changing rooms were and most likely are still disgusting. And the guys there were idiots."

"Bye Matthew," she said turning her head.

"Wait I'm not done," I called for her getting yet another middle finger in return as her oversized t-shirt swayed.

A small chuckle came from beside me, causing me to turn and see him with his left hand covering his mouth. To somewhat muffle his childish giggles.

"I don't what you're laughing at," sarcasm eminent in my teasing gaze and my smirk.

"Well, it's obviously the fool standing two metres away from me." To be a petty dumb ass I walked closer until I could feel his heavy breathing upon on my hoodie.

"What fool standing to metres away from you ?" I began staring down at him feeling heat grow at either ear " Because I'm closer than that."

He looked at me, with semi composure ; his eyes were freaking out whilst he maintained a nonchalant grin. I felt the alluring touch of him as he rested his hands just under both collar bones, albeit it brief moment as he then pushed me so that I was around where I was earlier.

"This one" he pointed at me.

"At least I'm not short."

He kissed his teeth, " be original. Also, I'm not short, just shorter than you. And at least I can commit to something for longer than a month."

My mouth opened to attempt a reason as to why he was entirely wrong, but I couldn't. I often got bored of my hobbies after a month or so, having only two things that had stuck.

"Wait, you're wrong," he looked up at me cheekily as though he knew my brain was seeking an answer through the disarray " I have been doing photography since I was 12 and clarinet since I was 6. So not to brag but I can commit if I want to."

He smiled up at me, forcing me a greater disorder of the mind. As my heart pulsed through my throat, I attempted to bring myself into somewhat of a composure.

"Well, I'm gonna go" his eyes once more directed to the floor.

"Yeah same, the bell is gonna go soon." I looked at the side, to see Faye with two girls as she smiled and laughed.

"Bye."

"Bye," he teased me another platonic simper.

Soon Saturday came, then left and Sunday morning, as usual, consisted of my mom dragging me out of bed, me being greeted by my father and brother Adam.

My brother Adam was like, no is still like, my weird soulmate whom I wouldn't date nor be overly affectionate with however I love him and know him in a way in which no one else does.

He's three years older and at the time was on his skip year between college and high school where he was working for the funds and enjoying his young freedom.

He wasn't home all that often, however, he always made time to go on a bro trip or play COD with me. Sometimes taunt me about not yet having had a girlfriend, but immediately after saying it's fine to wait a while.

"Hey apple pie," he smiled at me before giving me a bro hug - you know the one where it's a handshake into a hug so as to maintain your masculinity and embrace a male you care about.

"Didn't I tell you to stop calling me that."

He made a confused expression before saying, "But that time when you were 6 and you tried to prove you were a 'big boy' by carrying the apple pie to the table. Then you tripped over your laces and landed face-first into the pie, in front of everyone in the congregation was iconic."

"It'd be a crime if I didn't call you that," he smiled as though the memories were flashing before his very eyes. As though a chuckle was speedily rising at the back of his throat.

So I pushed him getting a confused face then an overly masculine "are you trying to fight"

An eye roll was the only answer he needed before I was pushed.

So I pushed him back again, but before my hands could leave his reach I was pulled back. I was pulled into the most smelly and uncomfortable chokehold, it was as though years worth of sweat, bad hygiene and 'manly' musks enveloped my nostrils in moments.

"Hey you two stop"

He didn't listen rather tightening his grip then giving me a wet Willy making me squeal I'm disgust and discomfort.

"Adam Roberts, stop now or else you're out the house !" my mom screamed an ear-piercing scream making the both of our eyes widen and his strong grip disappear within moments.

He made the, it was just a joke grunt before looking down at the floor in defeat. Which gave me a false sense of gusto, enough that I stuck my tongue out at him.

Then he stuck his at me before we knew it we were competing to see who could make the most stupid faces. I pulled down my bottom eyelids and he scrunched his nose, so I rolled my eyes back until I couldn't see

"Grow up," my dad said fighting back a grin.

We arrived at church, my hair slightly dishevelled as Adam repeatedly grabbed it as a 'brotherly gesture' despite my clear disapproval.

As soon as we arrived I was greeted by Alex and his wife, soon after some of the older women of the church complimenting me on how much I had grown and what a 'mature man' I was growing into.

Then I looked to the side, a spot in which was so often occupied by the likes of James and his mother. To my surprise, and quite frankly malady, he wasn't there same with his mother.

So I travelled slightly threw one vacant hall to the next until the edge of the cafe was now in my view; and he was there baring the same lackadaisical gaze, one in which always bordered melancholy, as he rested his disarray of curls upon the shoulder of his mom and her dirty blonde pixie cut.

He gazed briefly at me never once changing his expression, before turning his attention back to the wall. A ping of annoyance hit before I was called over by his mother

"Hi Matthew," she said as though she hadn't seen me in months, her South African accent only just daring its way through " I bet you and James must thrilled."

A confuse expression donned James' face, along with mine.

"Why are you two looking so oblivious all of a sudden." My mother pitched in looking onward the two of us.

"You haven't forgotten, have you ?"

We didn't need to reply as she knew by the way we looked at the floor.

"Wow, all those months of begging and doing extra chores and you've already forgotten ?"

She smiled.

"Well I shall remind you two"

"You're going on a boys getaway during the midterm break, for two weeks just as you planned only a few months ago."

My mouth went slack and my mind empty. My mind was so empty that the crevices were filled with the washed away memories from a decade ago.

"So as you arranged your fathers' shall be with you for a week and the other you two get to bro it out, or whatever you guys want to call it." His mother smiled, resting her hand upon his curls which seemed to have tightened in agitation.

"I" he paused briefly, in a confused daze " think I need to used the bathroom."

So off he went walking or rather running as though he had forgotten how to use his legs. Leaving me a mess of emotions and thoughts (thoughts of how I didn't want to go however I didn't want to seem rude).

So I just stood there thinking

Oh shit