Do you know the feeling. The feeling where you feel like everything's crumbling?

I've known that feeling. It was 8 years ago. 8 years ago I crumbled.

Flashback

"Mommy what's happening?" I asked my mother, terrified. Someone had broken in downstairs and was walking around.

"Stay quiet Riah, please." I nodded tears streaming down my cheeks. I had always been an emotional person.

Tears came easily to me. Just then the thumping of heavy footsteps came closer. Involuntary I whimpered.

I felt my mother's hands on my face, pulling me to look at her.

"Riah baby, I want you to be strong. Never let your tears fall for those who want them. I love you so much. Always remember that."

I was to confused to answer. She kissed my forehead and wiped my fallen tears. Then she got up and grabbed a shiny metal thing.

I stood frozen. After about a minute my eyes widened. I jumped out of the closet and ran downstairs.

I forgot to tell my mom I loved her back. I rushed down the stairs. I rushed to turn the corner but heard a gunshot ring out.

I ran around the corner and screamed.

End of flashback

I jolted upright instantly. My skin slick with sweat. Breathing heavily I felt the familiar burning sensation behind my eyes.

That was the worst night of my life. I went to check the clock but was interrupted.

"BITCH GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE!" My so called 'father' screamed at the bottom of the stairs.

My eyes widened in fright. He's been like this ever since my mother. He hates me. Quickly checking my alarm I saw it read 5am.

I pulled the old, disgusting covers from my damp skin and jumped in the shower. Taking 5 minutes in a boiling hot shower I got out.

My tan skin glinted with the water droplets slowly slipping down my exposed body.

The brown tangle of curls on my head wrapped around each other. They fell down to the middle of my back.

My hazel-gold eyes stared back at me. I looked like an identical match of my beautiful mother.

My body was slightly skinny, in an unhealthy matter but nothing noticable. The last were the bruises.

They littered my ribs and legs. My arms, thighs, pretty much every place on my small body you couldn't see with clothes on.

I was about 5'1, extremely short. Everyone always towered over me. I quickly dressed in an oversized hoodie and leggings.

Then, braiding my hair to the side I took a breath.

Dan, my 'father' disowned me as a daughter so I disowned him as a dad. I call him Dan now.

Dan remarried a women who had blonde hair and an ugly sneer always plastered on her face.

Melissa had big, fake breats that were always on display and two evil daughters.

Dan loves them more than me. Their names were Sara and Sophie. They were twins. Totally beautiful but wore to much makeup. With perfect bodies and big blue eyes, along with popular statice they made my life at school hell.

Not that it was any better here. Dan decided to move 6 hours away from the house we lived at, in New York.

I was beyond sad. I had found all my hiding places that I would take shelter in when all the devils were out for me.

My two best friends always helped me with the pain and meals. What was I going to do without them?!

I was 18 but Dan refused i leave. Apparently he liked beating me. I worked 2 jobs to be able to pay rent for living in the attic and my own food.

"YOU HOE GET YOUR SLUTTY ASS DOWN HERE!" That was Melissa. I grabbed my backpack that had everything of mine in it and scampered down the stairs.

Not even bothering to look at the food that covered the dining table I headed straight to the door to load all of the bags in the car.

After a good 20 minutes I had everything thoroughly in the vehicle so I went back in.

"Oh look. It's the whore. She's back." Sara spat while the rest of them laughed. I just stood with my head down.

I felt something hit me and I looked at my sweater. A big grease stain was now present and a sausage fell to the floor.

"That's the closest thing you can get to a dick in the next 6 hours. Better use it slut." Sophie told me. I held back tears.

My mother's voice flashed through my head, reminding me.

Never let your tears fall for those who want them.

These demons definitely wanted my tears so I held them back and swallowed the ball in my throat.

I heard the chairs screeching back and noticed everyone was getting up. All our normal plates were packed in boxes so they threw the paper ones out.

How my tongue longed to taste the spice of the sausage and creaminess of cheese eggs. I haven't had that in so long.

We all piled out and I sat in the back of the car by myself. Slipping my bent, half-broken headphones in my ears and turning on my ancient iPhone I couldn't held but feel the gnawing jealousy as Sophie and Sara pulled out the airpod pro's and iPhone 11 Pro Max's.

Looking out the window I watched as the sunrise lit up the New York streets. Scene blurred from landscape to landscape before my gaze.

Here we go Mariah.