She must’ve fallen asleep because she felt someone gently stroking her cheek and they were calling her name. She woke up and Elliot was looking down at her.

“Oh hey,” she whispered.

“You fell asleep,” he whispered back.

“For how long?”

“Just about an hour.”

She groaned and raised up stretching, trying to wake herself, she hated napping during the day, it always messed her head up.

“I made you some coffee, I’m not good at it but I figured you’d want some when you woke up,” he said.

“Thank you… so did you find anything?” she asked, getting out of bed and going to the counter to get her coffee. Elliot had put some sort of milk or something in it already and she filled the cup with coffee not knowing what to expect when she drank it. She took a sip, “Is this pumpkin spice?”

“Oh, yea I ran down the gas station and got a few of those little free cups of the flavored stuff,” he said. She raised her eyebrows, impressed, as she sipped on it some more. He sat down on the couch, so she joined him.

“So?” she urged.

“Nothing too bad, he’s clearly a douchebag but that was obvious before, just little things but nothing too… alarming.

“Well, that’s good right?”

“It’s not bad, he doesn’t seem to have any dangerous connections,” Elliot said, she knew he was probably referring to the dark army. It must have been horrible for them both to have to live in fear every day back then.

“Good, so you good?”

“Yea… umm I did want to ask you something, but you can say no.”

“Sure, you can ask me anything,” she said, though she was a little apprehensive.

“Mr. Robot wants to meet you and talk.”

“Oh…”

“Is that… okay?”

“Of course, umm like right now?”

“Yea,” he said. She waited patiently for him to switch, she looked away and drank her coffee casually to make them both more comfortable.

“Well, look at you,” he said, getting a cigarette and lighting it.

“Hello, I guess you know I’m Raine,” she said, extending a hand.

He shook it, “yes, but I have to say you are much more beautiful up close like this.”

She blushed but didn’t return his gaze, “thank you.”

“So, you’re the famous Raine.”

“So, I am.”

He chuckled, “this is a little awkward.”

“Yea a little but I think it’s good, I am glad to meet you.”

“Likewise… listen umm this is not my idea at all, although in some ways it would be a pleasure… Elliot wanted me to kiss you.”

“WHAT?”

“I know, I told him it was a bad idea, but he said since I’m here for the stuff he can’t handle…”

“Isn’t that like… cheating?” she asked.

He lifted his arms and shrugged, “it was his idea, he wants to make you happy and he thought this was the solution.”

“Well it’s not,” she was a little angry, but she knew it was coming from a good place, so she tried to calm herself down, “sorry, this is all new to me.”

“Yea me too… I mean how I look and how I feel is like…”

“Elliot’s father?”

“Yea, well in looks alone, but as far as our relationship he is like a son to me, so you can imagine how awkward this is for me.”

“So, you look like that,” she nodded at a picture of Elliot’s family on one of his shelves, “to yourself? Like in the inner world?”

He eyed her curiously, “how do you know about that?”

“I was a psych major and I did some research on my own, because of Elliot… well because of Darlene, when she first told me her brother had DID, I figured I could give her better advice if I knew what I was talking about.”

“Hmm,” was all the noise he made, then after a pause, “so that’s common? With other people?”

“Yea, did Krista not tell you?”

“Well she focuses on us, and she did say to join a Facebook support group but…”

“Elliot hates social media,” she finished for him, “… but it could help, it doesn’t need to be Facebook, just you know, research helps.”

“He doesn’t like talking about this stuff much… but I could and just let him know what’s common and what isn’t.”

“Yea,” she was happy about this conversation so far.

“You have any questions for me?” he asked.

“Well… did Elliot hack me?”

“Define hack.”

“You know what I mean.”

“Well we looked you up and checked out everything about you online but he stopped himself from looking at anything private.”

“Really?” she said, pleased.

“Yea but you gotta do something about that guy.”

“Right, I do, myself… not Elliot,” she said.

“Maybe I could…”

“No… just wait it out, he might stop.”

“What’s his name?”

“Nope, no I’m not telling you either.”

“So, you don’t want to kiss me?”

“No.”

“I mean it would just be physical and Elliot is really pushing for this, and I told him if you agreed, as weird as it is, I would do it.”

“It’s not gonna happen, I know he means well and logically I guess I can see where he’s coming from but nothing either of you says would ever change my mind, even if it wasn’t like cheating on him, even if it happened down the road, which I don’t want, but even if… it’s certainly not happening now or for this reason.”

“Why not?”

“Because I want my first kiss with Elliot to be, with Elliot.”

He just stared at her for a while.

“I’m sorry, it’s nothing personal against you, but he means a lot to me,” she said.

“You mean a lot to him too, and because of that you mean a lot to me… not in the same way, more like… I don’t know.”

She laughed lightly.

“What’s funny?” he asked.

“Well it’s weird and even though you look like that to me, I still picture you as looking like that,” she pointed to Elliot’s dad, “and knowing what I know about you from what Elliot and Darlene have told me it’s like… you’re very much like the ‘cool uncle’ type in my head.”

“Well… that’s not the worst thing I’ve been called by a long shot… you know I’m just here to make sure he’s okay and I know you’re very young and this is all fun, but Elliot is really serious about you.”

“I know, I am too, about him.”

“You sure?”

“You’re getting protective now? After agreeing to kiss his girlfriend?”

“Again, his idea.”

She laughed, “look, I know what you want to hear, that I will never hurt him, but I don’t make vague promises just because they sound good… I can’t promise that we won’t fight, that I won’t say things that hurt his feelings, I’m a mess from my past and I put my foot in my mouth a lot… but I can promise that I have the best intentions and I am completely serious here, I’ve never felt this way about anyone before and I am loyal to a fault.”

“Well, we know that last part is true, not many people would refuse to cheat on their boyfriend… with their boyfriend.”

“You’re not him though,” she said.

“And how many people would even understand that?”

“Fair enough,” she said.

“Something else I want to tell you, but Elliot probably wouldn’t like it,” he said.

“Then you probably shouldn’t tell me,” she said.

“No, it’s fine, he’s just shy,” he said, then he continued even though she hadn’t agreed to hear it, “when Elliot was looking you up he found some modeling pictures.”

“So? We talked about that, I needed some extra money before the hack because of Papi’s mortgage so I modeled, fully dressed, for some rock magazines, apparently, I have the ‘rocker chick’ look”

“And you had blonde and black hair then.”

“Don’t like the pink?”

“It’s fine, but those pictures… well especially the one in the short shorts leaning over the hood of a car… Elliot really liked those,” he said.

“Well… that’s good?” she said, not knowing what he was getting at.

“You know what I mean, he really liked it, like five or six times.”

“Oh my gosh, don’t tell me that!” she shouted.

“It’s natural,” he said.

“No, I mean that’s his business,” she said.

“It’s yours too, I mean it was your picture… so what do you think?”

“I think Elliot is going to be pissed that you told me that.”

“Some part of him wanted me to, so now that it’s out there what do you think? I mean I can’t unsay it, you might as well be honest,” he said.

“Well… since it’s already out there,” she sighed, “I mean I think it’s really… hot.”

“Does it turn you on, thinking about it?”

“Why would you even ask me that?”

“Come on, does it? Just picture it,” he said.

She didn’t want to, but the image wouldn’t get out of her mind, she bit her lip and accidentally breathed, “yea.”

“Now will you kiss me?” he said.

“What? NO!” she said.

“Okay I tried,” he said.

“Was that a test? Really? You’re such a jerk,” she said, shaking her head.

“I didn’t know how else to turn you on without touching you or making him jealous,” he said.

She crossed her arms and huffed, “so he didn’t really…” she started.

“Oh no he definitely did,” he laughed. She rolled her eyes, so he said, “don’t hate me, I’m just me, I know I’m chaotic, but I only had good intentions, he said to try anyway I could to convince you.”

“Why does he want this so bad?”

“For you, he would hate it but wants you to have everything you want and doesn’t want you to miss out on the physical side of a relationship.”

“Well I’m not happy with either of you right now… but I don’t hate you, you’re infuriating, but I don’t hate you,” she said.

“Don’t tell him I told you about that, please?” he said.

“And embarrass him like that? Oh, I won’t, but you should,” she said.

“Why? If it would only embarrass him?”

“Because I don’t like keeping things from him.”

“Oh, like your ex messaging you?”

She scowled at him, “you know why I can’t tell him that.”

He nodded, “I’m really sorry about the kissing thing, it really wasn’t my idea.”

“I know,” she sighed, “I know it’s just really… I understand but he’s not thinking it through on so many levels, which is why I can’t tell him about Luke…” she stopped, damn it.

“Luke? Oh the ex,” he said.

“Here we go…” she said.

“For Elliot, I won’t say anything.”

“Really?”

“Yea, you’re right, he would do something impulsive and reckless, but I want you to promise me you won’t just ignore it, he won’t go away until you find a way to make him.”

“I- it’s just really hard when you don’t want to acknowledge someone even exists, and when you do think about it you get so scared that you go into a panic attack and can’t function…”

“We should just have Leon kill the son of a bitch.”

She laughed then said, “I hope you’re joking?”

“Eh, about half.”

She eyed him for a moment and decided he probably wouldn’t do that. Even though part of her almost hoped he would.

“Well this has been… interesting,” he said.

“To say the least,” she agreed.

“Maybe next time we can talk about our favorite movies and not about adultery and murder,” he teased.

“Hopefully, either way, I’m glad we did meet, honestly, I want to get to know you and maybe we can be friends,” she said.

He looked at her like she was the first person to ask to be his friend, “I’d like that.”

She got up to clean her cup because she knew Elliot was about to switch and she wanted to give him some privacy.

“Hey,” Elliot said.

She wanted to be cool and understanding but she couldn’t help turning around and shouting, “Elliot, you told him to kiss me? Really?”

“I… I thought,” he started.

She went over and sat beside him, “you thought I would be okay kissing someone I just met? After I told you I have my own reasons for wanting to take things slow? After knowing I’ve never had sex without it feeling like rape?” she started to cry and Elliot looked like he was dying inside, she hated it, but she couldn’t help how it made her feel.

“I didn’t think about that part…” he whispered.

“Yea you didn’t think about it at all, or anyone else, how he would feel, how I would feel just…”

“I was doing it for you, you think I want you kissing him and not me?”

“Just stop talking,” she said, tears running down her face.

He tried to wipe them away and said, “baby,” but she moved away from him and crossed her arms and said, “just let me be mad for a while.”

She sat there for a minute before she heard it, he was crying so she looked over at him. He had his head in his hands and he was sniffling and making all these heartbreaking little noises and she hated herself. Luke had done this lots of times, cried to get his way but she had to remind herself that this wasn’t Luke and she knew the difference in fake crying, and this was anything but fake.

“Elliot, oh my gosh, I’m so sorry,” she said going over to him.

He raised up, “you don’t have anything to be sorry about, I shouldn’t have done that.”

She sighed, “But logically, I can kind of see why you thought of it, you just didn’t think it through… all the way.”

“I told you I’m really bad at this,” he said, tears still running down his face.

“Please stop crying, it’s killing me,” she sobbed, “I didn’t mean to go off on you like that, I understood where you were coming from, I just… it’s that PTSD and shit I was talking about,” she said.

“I’m not crying because you got mad, I just realized how insensitive it was to try and push that on you after knowing… as you said,” he could bring himself to repeat what she had said, “and then the weight of what you said hit me and that’s mainly what upset me.”

“What? That I’ve never had sex without…”

“Yea,” he interrupted like he couldn’t take hearing it again. Some part of her realized if he found out anytime soon who Luke was and that he was still bothering her, he wouldn’t hack him or hire Leon, Elliot would probably kill him himself with his bare hands.

She cradled his face with her hands, “look at me, I’m fine… you’re the best thing that’s happened to me… in a long time.”

“I doubt that,” he said.

“No really… even before we met, you saved Papi’s house from the bank, got us out of debt and did all that stuff, you told Darlene to work at the shop, literally every good thing that’s happened to me since after Papi took me in, can be traced back to you somehow… and that’s honestly the truth.”

He sighed, “well a part of me.”

“A part of you is still a part of you… and don’t say that means I can kiss Mr. Robot because it’s not the same,” she laughed.

“I wasn’t going to,” he said.

“Well he would have,” she said.

“Mr. Robot? Yea that does sound like him,” he paused, “how do you know people so well so soon?”

“I don’t know it’s just something I’m good at… it’s a gift,” she shrugged, feigning cockiness, this made him smile, then she added, “aside from all the… drama, I do like him by the way, like as a person.”

“He’s letting me remember,” he paused, “this will sound weird probably but he has been letting me remember parts of you guys’ conversation.”

“Oh?”

“I’m sorry about… the pictures,” he blushed.

“Ohh… well did he let you remember what I said?”

“That is was hot?”

“Yep, now I’m embarrassed.”

“So, you don’t think that’s gross? Or intrusive?”

“I knew it would probably happen with random people when I took them. So, you, someone I like and know and… stuff, doing that is the least intrusive thing related to those pictures,” she laughed. But Elliot’s eyes clouded with a look she hadn’t seen on him yet, so she said, “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t like that, other guys looking at you like that,” he said, candidly.

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” he said.

“Well if you like them you should save them or print them out before you take them off the internet,” she said knowingly, before getting up to get more coffee.

He scoffed, “How did you… never mind.”

She laughed, and looked back at him from the kitchen counter, “you know it’s kind of sexy that you’re jealous.” She came back and sat sideways on the couch facing him.

“I don’t want to be controlling, I just don’t like the thoughts of…”

She touched his arm, “I know, I honestly don’t either… well unless it’s you.”

He looked at her intensely and the image came back to her, of him, looking at her on his computer, she knew the exact picture Mr. Robot had mentioned, the idea that Elliot couldn’t keep from… she shook her head like the thoughts would fly out somehow.

“What?” he asked.

“Trying not to think about it,” she said.

He lit a cigarette and blew the smoke in the air, something about him doing that made her think of the old movies when characters would smoke to look cool or sexy, she always thought it was ridiculous that people would find that sexy. Then she saw the way Elliot did it, everything he did made her feel like she was watching how people moved and behaved for the first time. He had his own way of doing everything like he somehow knew that he could improve anything because he did.

He watched her and took another hit, “think about what?” he said blowing the smoke out as he said it.

“You,” was her only answer.

He squinted his eyes, “you don’t want to think about me?”

“Doing… that? No, it’s too much,” she laughed.

“Oh,” he said. She watched him smoke in silence for a while, and he looked at her out of the corner of his eye, “what?”

“You know, you could be less sexy if you wanted to,” she said pretending to be mad.

“I’m just setting here,” he said defensively.

“Smoking,” she said.

“Smoking is sexy?” he asked.

“It is the way you do it,” she laughed.

“See this is why I did what I did, you clearly need some di…” he stopped himself but laughed.

“Say it,” she pressed.

“I’m trying to be polite,” he said.

“I don’t want you to be polite, I want you to be yourself,” she said.

“Well I was gonna say dick,” he said.

“I know,” she laughed, “thank you though.”

“For saying dick?” he asked, confused.

She laughed, “No, no… for trying, you know to come up with a way, a solution… it may have had some flaws, but you tried, for me, so thank you.”

“I’ll fix it,” he said.

“No, we will fix it, I don’t want you pushing yourself like that, just talk to Krista…”

“What about you, how will I know when you’re ready?”

“I want to take things slowly but I could do it now,” she said.

“I don’t want you to do it because I’m ready, I want you to want to,” he said.

“You smoking turns me on, pretty sure I want to,” she laughed, “I only got so mad because it was about doing it with someone that’s not you.”

“I’m sorry still, that I didn’t think of that, it’s… complicated because he is a part of me,” he said.

“I know, it’s not like you offered my body to some other… external person, it is a different situation so I totally get your logic in… the plan,” she said.

“What about our thing? A special thing for now?” he asked.

“Well you’ve kissed me on the head, so it’s not like you can’t kiss me, somewhat.”

“Wouldn’t it be weird for you to kiss me on the head?” he asked.

“Sometimes, and impossible if we are standing because you’re taller than me, hmm,” she said, getting an idea. She took his hand, “you know when you take things slowly like this, every touch feels amazing,” she started stroking his hand with her fingertips, making shapes lightly.

He looked up at her and licked his lips, “Mmm, yea it does,” he breathed.

She raised his hand to her face and lightly grazed each of his fingertips with her lips, he moaned. She lightly kissed his palm in several places as he fidgeted beside her. Then she turned his hand over and kissed it on the back, she kept it close to her lips as she said, “this will be our thing, when we get that super affectionate feeling, we take the other by the hand and kiss the back of it.” Then she kissed the back of his hand lightly again before giving it back to him. He just stared at her and blinked a few times.

“You okay?” she chuckled.

He bit his lip, “that was… how?”

“How what?”

“How did you make that better than any sex I’ve ever had?” he asked almost in a whisper.

“Oh, come on,” she said.

“No, I’m being serious,” he said. She looked at him and he had that look, he was being completely serious.

She shrugged, a little shy about it, “maybe it’s because of how we feel about each other, and as I said, when you take things slow, every little touch is special, and it really helps with trust.”

He moved the hair away from her face, then rested his hand on her shoulder, and began stroking her cheek with his thumb. Her body tingled all over. All of a sudden there was a knock at the door.

“Fuck,” Elliot said lightly.

“Ay, it’s Leon, you home?” a voice came muffled through the door.

Elliot just sat there, so Raine said, “are you going to answer?”

“Are you okay with that? I mean it’s our date night?” he said.

“It is?” she asked.

“Well yea we were going to be alone and watch movies, I thought it was a date,” he said.

“Oh, okay,” she said.

“What did you think it was?”

“I don’t know, I thought we were just like having… a relationship?” she said.

He smiled and Leon knocked again, “Yo Darlene said you weren’t feeling good, so I wanted to check and see if you’re good?”

Raine looked at Elliot, “if you want to let him in, it’s fine.”

Elliot got up and Raine stood and straightened out her dress walked over to the kitchen to greet their guest.

Elliot opened the door and said, “What’s up?”

“Hey, you doing okay cuz?” Leon said.

“Yea just hanging out getting ready to smoke,” he said.

“Who’s this?” Leon said, spotting Raine behind Elliot.

“Oh, this is my uhh… my girlfriend,” Elliot said.

“Girlfriend? That’s what’s up,” he said.

Raine walked around Elliot and shook Leon’s hand, he was cute and somehow looked like he would be a nice person. She knew from what she’d heard that he was, but also just something about his eyes were kind.

“Not to sound misogynistic or like I’m hitting on your girl, but she is very a very lovely lady,” Leon said.

“Thank you,” she blushed, Elliot just grinned with one side of his mouth, not even a little jealous. It was probably the first time she’d ever been called ‘lovely’ or a ‘lady’.

“Well I can leave you kids alone if I’m interrupting,” Leon said.

“No, you can smoke with us if you want,” Raine said, looking at Elliot to make sure he was okay with it. He nodded once so lightly that it was almost unnoticeable.

Elliot sat on the edge of the couch and Raine sat beside him but left some space between them because she didn’t want to be all over him in front of his friend. Leon grabbed a kitchen chair and sat it sideways of the couch nearest Elliot, facing the side of the coffee table. He leaned back in the chair and brought out some of his own weed and started telling them how good it was and that they should smoke his to try it out.

“So Raine, you like Seinfeld?” was one of the first questions he asked her and Elliot stifled a laugh.

“Actually, I do, it’s really special to me because my dad loved it and he’s gone now so if I ever miss him too much, I watch it and it makes me feel better.”

“See that’s what I’m talking about, it’s not just trivial shit man, tv can change your life,” Leon started. Elliot smiled and made a ‘here we go’ face at Raine but he looked happy. They smoked and talked and laughed and ordered take-out. Leon told her a few things about prison that Elliot had left out, out of sheer humility.

“Your boy is tough, let me tell you, he stood up for me against a gang of ignorant ass racists, wouldn’t leave my side, he was loyal to an actual fault because they were mad cuz, man they hated us,” Leon said. Raine smiled at Elliot proudly. The more they smoked the less Elliot talked but the more Leon made up for it. At one point she felt Elliot start tracing the back of her hand lightly with his fingertips as his hand rested on her wrist. She looked at him, but he was talking to Leon almost as though he was unaware he was even doing it. She slowly turned her hand over to lace her fingers with his and he lifted her hand and kissed the back of it lightly without even looking away from Leon. Leon quickly glanced at her and smiled then returned to what he was saying to Elliot.

Before he left, Leon told Elliot, “you hold on to her cuz, she’s hot, smart and most importantly you got a light in you that I’ve never seen before.” Elliot smiled and they said their goodbyes with a fist bump which Raine thought was way out of character for Elliot, so she knew he must really like Leon. Leon tipped his hat at her to which she nodded and smiled and he left. Elliot closed the door behind him and walked back over to the couch and sat. He let out a deep breath.

“He is… something,” Raine said.

“Yea he’s a lot,” Elliot said.

“I really liked him,” she said.

“Yea, he’s had my back for a long time… more than almost anyone else would have, well I told you.”

“Yea you told me how loyal he was, but you didn’t tell me how brave you were standing up for your friend.”

“I didn’t want to sound like a douchbag, I don’t like bragging or talking about fighting, even when it is necessary to do, telling people… it all sounds like tough guy bullshit when you talk about yourself like that.”

“Am I ever going to learn something about you that doesn’t make me like you more than I already did?” she teased.

“I hope not, but probably,” he said. Darlene had told her that Elliot could have a really bad temper, but he would never hurt someone who didn’t deserve it. But with her PTSD she didn’t know how she would handle Elliot yelling and breaking things. As Darlene said he’d done before, but only on rare occasions and she wasn’t even sure it had been Mr. Robot or Elliot because that was before they knew about the disorder. He had grabbed Darlene too hard once but besides that Mr. Robot had never hurt anyone intentionally either, aside from Elliot. Unlike the movie tropes, people with Elliot’s disorder were almost never dangerous to external people, even the most violent alters were more likely to self-harm, than even think about hurting anyone else. But still, even if she knew he was safe, loud noises from car doors and someone cheering had triggered her PTSD before so she hoped they could both keep it together. They started watching ‘the iron giant’ because Elliot insisted, and he put his arm around her and let her cuddle up next to him. The movie made her cry and Elliot pulled her close when he heard her sniffling. He touched her chin and turned her head to face him, he wiped her tears with his thumb and pulled her head to his chest kissing her forehead lightly. After a while, he said, “I have an appointment with Krista on Wednesday, but I think I’m gonna call and see if I can get in sooner.”

“Whatever you want babe,” she mumbled, nearly dozing off because she was so comfortable and relaxed.

“Sleepy?” he asked.

“Yea, I don’t know why,” she said.

“Probably all that pot you smoked,” he chuckled.

“I smoke all the time,” she said, cuddling over on him even more.

“Not with Leon,” he said.

She lay there half-awake as he ran his fingers lazily through her hair and smoked a cigarette with the other hand. “I think it’s you,” she said.

“What?”

“Making me sleepy, you’re so comfy and you’re petting me, it’s so relaxing.”

He laughed, “petting?”

“What else do you call it?” she asked, “stroking sounds dirty.”

“I’m just playing with your hair; do you want me to stop?”

“Never,” she teased. The movie had long been over, but they stayed like that for a long time just being together in silence.

After a while, Raine got up and stretched, trying to wake up, she offered to take flipper out while Elliot called Krista. It was around nine at night and she thought it was a little out of the ordinary to call your psychologist this late. But what did she know, she hadn’t ever been to one even though she had wanted to be one herself. Being on the other side of being figured out didn’t seem too appealing. She looked up to Elliot’s window and he was looking down at her holding the phone to his ear. He had been nervous about her going out alone this late because he lived in a bad neighborhood. When flipper was finally done, she went back upstairs, he had left the door unlocked so they went in.

“Hey,” he said. He had changed into a pair of sweatpants and didn’t have a shirt on.

“Hi,” she said, she unlatched flipper and watched her run to Elliot, who picked her up and rubbed her head.

“Where you a good girl?” he asked her, she licked his chin in response.

“She was good, but she really wanted to take her time,” Raine laughed.

“She always does that,” he said, setting her down on his bed. “What about you?” he asked grabbing her wrists and pulling her to him, she tilted her head in mock confusion, so he continued, “were you a good girl?”

She giggled and pressed up against him as he pulled her arms around his waist then put his own over her shoulders. He gave her a quick hug and kiss on the top of her head.

She looked up at him, “What did Krista say?”

“I had to leave a voicemail,” he said.

“Oh, well it’s late.”

“I should have called earlier,” he said.

“Well it’s the weekend, so Monday would be the earliest appointment anyway.”

He nodded, “Maybe.”

She wasn’t sure what that meant but she reluctantly pried herself away from him and went over and started unpacking her bag, “I brought something to sleep in, but I don’t think wearing it would be a good idea.”

“Why not?” he asked, and she laid it out on his bed, he looked at it, “damn.”

“Yea I will probably just wear your shirt again.”

“That’s just as bad,” he laughed.

“Oh, I brought your clothes back, but I can wash them for you if you want, we have a washroom in the back of the shop,” she said.

“We have laundry downstairs,” he said.

“But do you have to pay for it?”

“Yea like quarters,” he said.

“You should bring your laundry to the shop, it’s free, Darlene does it all the time.”

“Will it get you in trouble?”

“With who?” she laughed.

“Oh, I keep forgetting you own the place.”

“Technically Papi owns it still, oh before I forget, I always spend all of Sunday with him, I drive out to his place and make sure everything is going good, make sure his meds are good, I make him dinner and things like that and then take him to church,” she said.

He was smiling at her, “that’s really sweet.”

“Well he’s family, anyway I just wanted you to know ahead of time to make sure it’s okay,” she said.

“Yea… that’s fine?” he said.

“Good,” she said.

“You know… you don’t need my permission to do anything, right?” he said.

“Oh, right, I just… that’s not something normal people do in relationships is it?”

“I don’t think so, I’m not sure, but thanks for telling me,” he said.

“So, letting you know what I’m doing is normal but asking if I can, isn’t,” said clarified to herself.

“I want you to feel free to do whatever, if you don’t let me know what you’re doing that’s okay, if you’re just telling me cause you want to, that’s cool, if you forget to tell me, that’s cool too,” he said setting on the bed and taking her arm, pulling her towards him. She stood in front of him and put her hands on the back of his head and began running her fingers through the short hair on the back of his head. He put his hands on her hips and looked up at her, “I want to be the opposite of everything bad that’s happened to you,” he said.

“Aww,” came out of her mouth before she could stop it, but he didn’t seem to mind. She hugged his head to her stomach and kissed the top of his head. His hair was soft on her face and it smelled like coconut shampoo. She took his shirt she’d worn the night before to the bathroom and changed into it. When she came out he was already in the bed, covered up with his laptop on his lap. She got the lights and crawled in next to him and laid her head on his shoulder and watched him type stuff she didn’t understand.

“Whatcha doin?” she asked. She was trying to be cute to hide that she was a little concerned about what he was doing.

“Making something… it’s a secret,” he said, grinning at her. She hugged his bicep with her arms and lay there watching words and symbols appear on his screen.

“I’ll work on this later,” he said, closing the window and pulling up a different screen where he had a list of movies. She made him watch ‘Benny and Joon’, one of her favorites.

“Why did you download this if you haven’t seen it?” she asked before it started.

“Darlene was talking about how you liked it one time,” he said. She was amazed at his ability to remember such mundane details. Later, as it went off she said, “this song is either really annoying or super awesome,” referring to ‘I’m gonna be’ which played at the end of the movie.

“I liked it, the movie,” he said.

“Really? I’m kind of surprised.”

“They kind of remind me of us… in a way.”

“Joon and Sam?” she paused thinking it over, “yea they are like… different than everyone else but they get each other and are good for each other.”

“Now I want grilled cheese,” he said.

“Me too, made with an iron?” she laughed.

“It’s not a bad idea, really.”

“No, no it’s kind of clever.”

“I don’t have any bread,” he said, “I’m sorry.”

She laughed, “maybe some other time, I’m too sleepy to eat anyway.”

Unlike last night, as he was putting his laptop away, she rolled over facing his closet, when he got back in bed, she felt that he was unsure what to do so she whispered, “Elliot?”

“Yea.”

“Can you come hold me?” she asked. She felt him get as close to her as possible and he put his arm over her lacing his fingers through hers and pulling her even closer until her back was tight against his chest. He rested his head on hers and she felt his lips and breath on her ear, sending a shiver through her body.

“Goodnight baby,” he whispered in her ear and she moaned softly, he was trying to kill her, death by temptation.

“Goodnight,” she whispered back.