《Demonology For Morons》The Great Light
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Chapter 7
I make my way to the front of the cave wondering what I’ll find on the outside. I mean what do I do if I get to the exit and find a pack of wolves eating a horde of scared idiots. Worse what do I do if I find a pack of wolves not eating a horde of scared idiots? What do you call a group of imps anyway? A pack, a horde, or maybe an infestation? Well it doesn’t matter, what really matters is what to do if I find myself in danger of getting eaten. I should have kept a few of the idiots so I could throw them at whatever problems I have and escape. Maybe I could still catch a few if I catch up.
Now I’m moving a lot quicker towards the exit wondering what the look on the face of the first idiot I find will be, or better yet the second one when he sees I’m dragging around an unwilling idiot. Should I give them names? No I heard that if you give pets names it becomes that much harder to let them go when the time comes or in this case throw into a pack of predators. Though I don’t really remember where I heard that from…
Speaking of hearing things I’m starting to hear a bunch of noise further ahead. Being the smart imp that I am I move a bit more cautiously trying not to be seen by the possible things that want to eat me. Then as I get closer I realize that it’s pointless because it’s just the idiots all clustered around the cave exit while doing idiot things. Why haven’t they left? Is there something out there they think is scarier than me? Only one way to find out, so I reveal myself to the idiots. A few notice me and look at me with while starting to shake again, and then they move to the sides of the cave and try to make themselves look smaller. Soon more notice and do the same until all of them are cowering against the walls of the cave. I feel like a bully. Well let’s not sweat the small stuff.
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Still, if there this scared, why haven’t any of them run out of the cave? Well there’s only one way to find out. So I slowly and confidently walk past the idiots and move to the exit that’s getting brighter and brighter. It’s getting more and more painful as I walk forward but I won’t stop after all I’m not like those idiots I’m the Hero who destroyed the light! I just barley manage to get outside due to the pain, look up and run back inside screaming and blind.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
End +1
I start rolling on the cave floor yelling and crying until the pain starts to leave and my sight starts to come back. When I look around I can see something blurry coming at me slowly, carrying something bigger than it. I can’t think of what it is until it gets closer. It’s an idiot carrying a pick. When he realizes I can see him he drops the pick and starts backing up quickly backing up.
THIS ASSHOLE! He was gonna kill me while I was down and in pain! Who does that shit! What a jerk! Naturally I can’t let that slide so I rush forward and punch him in the face; I grab him by the back of the neck and drag him to the cave opening. Then I toss his ass out and listen to the screams while rubbing my eyes.
THE FUCK! I destroyed the circle why is there a bright ass light out there! That things way brighter than the light that showed up in the darkness. Did someone make a better circle to make that thing? Wait! If Master drew that summoning circle does that mean anyone can make them? DAMNIT!
Okay I need to think. First thing I need to figure out is how to get out of this cave. Next I need to look into summoning circles somehow. Then I need to destroy whatever circle that makes that bright ass light in the sky.
Scratch that, the moment I find out what makes that fucking light I need to drop whatever I’m doing and destroy it. Yeah gotta have priorities. I still need to figure out how to get out of this cave first. This might take some time…
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