《Ace of all Trades》Volume 1: Chapter 1: Nothing but Time
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Chapter 1: Nothing but Time
‘And Done.’ I put my pencil down and crack each of my fingers. Even though only twenty minutes have passed, I was writing for the entirely of those twenty minutes.
I get up, pick up my papers and walk up to the front podium to hand in my final exam.
Professor: “Already done?” The professor asks. As I am usually among the first ones done when it comes to exams, he is no longer surprised.
“That's right.” I say as I hand him my test papers. He flips through all the pages to make sure I answered everything.
Professor: “Everything looks good, have a great summer.” He says as he places my exam papers on the podium in front of him.
“Thanks, you have a good one as well." I say politely and return to my seat. I gather my stuff and depart from the room, silently closing the door behind me.
As I walk through the halls like a man without a mission, I encounter one of the few people who actually approaches me when I give off my 'loner' vibe.
???: “Hey, finished with your exams already?" He asks me.
'What was his name again? I don't remember... Wait! Ah that's right. I never knew his name in the first place!'
"Yes I'm done, what about you?" I ask politely.
???: "Lucky~ Mine are starting today." He sighs.
'Really? What is so lucky about having less time to prepare for a test than you would like?' I mentally sigh.
"Are you ready for your exams?" I ask politely still.
???: "Nope~" He exclaims while shrugging.
“Going to wing it again?” I ask while sighing.
???: “You know it!” He gives me a thumbs up.
"Why do I even bother." I sigh in exasperation.
'Why pay to go to school if you aren't going to take it seriously?' I mentally sigh as well.
???: "Have you heard about that new virtual reality game?" He asks me suddenly.
"New virtual reality game..." I muse. "Doesn't ring any bells. I've heard of the legendary ones but they aren't 'new' so I have no clue what your going on about."
???: "Ah that's right. When all those games were just coming out, you were the only one who wasn't able to play as you couldn't afford them right?" He asks nonchalantly.
'While there is no malice in his words they still irritate me...'
"If you already know, then why ask?" I ask him. I took great pains to keep my voice irritation free, but it was really more trouble that it's worth.
???: "To irritate you why else?" He says offhandedly.
'Ah that's right. I take great pains keeping my voice calm because if I show any hint of irritation, he will continue to annoy me until he gets bored, and that can be a really long time.' I mentally sigh.
"Are you done yet?" I ask him patiently.
???: According to my sources." He begins but I cruelly interrupt him.
“Since when have you had sources?” I inject a serious amount of disbelief in my question.
???: "As I was saying," he completely disregards my interruption. "According to my sources, Methodius Online will be having it's first ever open beta test where everyone is invited to join." He says solemnly.
"Wait, what?!?" I exclaimed, surprised that this "Methodius Online" could be generous at to give away free copies of the game. But the surprise only lasted a few seconds before reason reasserted itself. "What's the catch?" Nothing that good is ever free."
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???: "So wise for someone so young." He says nodding in approval.
I grit my teeth and bear it as this was yet another one of his attempts to annoy me. I may have mellowed out during my stay at college, but I'm not infallible. Seeing that I didn't bite, he continues on.
???: "The 'catch' as you put it is that you have to buy the 'dive equipment' yourself." He says in his mater-of-fact tone that just annoys me to no end. And he knows it irritates me, and that is why he uses it when ever he says something worth listening to. It's rather vexing.
"Figures. No way I can afford it then." I shrug as it has nothing to do with me.
'With that he should be done and leave me alone.' Unfortunately, my hopes are dashed as he continues speaking in his matter-of-fact voice.
???: "Apparently when you purchase the dive equipment not only do you get the right to participate in the upcoming beta test, you also get a free year's subscription to Methodius Online."
"So not only are they trying to push us to buy their equipment, they are also trying to create future sales by providing a year to full experience the game and get addicted? Their marketing team must be doing serious work if this motive isn't discovered." I sigh. I would be impressed if the world at large didn't come to this conclusion, but then again, I am just a tad more cynical than the average person.
???: "Who knows," He shrugs. "According to my sources, Methodius Online is said to have reached the level similar to that of its legendary predecessors."
"You don't say." I put so much disbelief in my voice that you could even feel it in the air.
???: "That's the rumor anyway." He shrugs again. "Who knows if it is true or not, but the general public is lapping it up, because a flood of people have already ordered their dive equipment."
'It is official. The general public as a whole are complete idiots.' I mentally sigh at their stupidity.
"Are you finished yet?" I ask him patently. If i wait long enough, he will eventually get bored and go away.
???: "Almost." He sighs. Since he wasn't getting a rise out of me, he was starting to grow bored. So he started making his parting shots. "Maybe someone will take pity on you and buy the said dive equipment so you can actually play?"
"Who knows?" Maybe it will happen just as you said." I say while shrugging.
A smile creeps onto my face as I know full well that nothing in this world is truly free. Even if someone does buy me the dive equipment, the price that I would have to pay would most likely be more than what I was willing to part with.
???: "I guess only time will tell." He sighs. I bet he was sad that he still couldn't get a rise out of me. "Well, while it has been fun talking with you, I best be off so I can find a good spot to sit. Have a nice summer, and don't be too bored." With that he waves me goodbye and continues walking don the hall and turns out of fight.
'Annoying to the end. What did I do to deserve this?' I mentally sigh.
'Maybe he took pity on your lonesome self and decided to talk to you?'
'You are not helping .' I mentally sigh again. 'Why must I be besieged on all sides by annoyances?'
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'Did you hear that? I'm pretty sure he called you an annoyance.'
'Really? I thought he was calling you the annoyance.'
'Videogames? I want to play moar video games!'
Ignoring the three way argument going inside my head I let out a long sigh and continue towards the food court, which was my original destination before i was abruptly stopped.
'Are those three arguing again?'
'Do you even need to ask? Their argument was stupid to begin with so I stopped listening once the third one joined in.' I mentally sigh.
Their argument had long ago devolved into a childish fish over who was right and who was wrong, and a is a complete waste of my mental energy.
'Lately they have been more annoying than usual, but at least I can still ignore them.'
'At least "He" hasn't shown himself lately. But I assume he must be plotting something again. You best be on your guard.'
'No rest for the weary it seems.' I mentally sigh once more.
I finally reach the school's food court, so I buy myself a sandwich and a cup of coffee. After paying for them with the funds from my student loans, I go in search for an empty table which I could camp for a while. The search was shorter than I expected as I managed to snipe a table that just became vacant moments before. As I slowly eat my sandwich and enjoy my coffee, I start thinking on how to spend my summer.
'Now that I've been given the key to the shackles called Academia, what am I going to do with my new found freedom?' I wonder to my self.
'You could play more videogames!'
'But I've already completed all the games I own three times over and to 100% each time, save for one. And when that one is done, unless I get the motivation to start a fourth set of 100% playthroughs, I won't have a solid way to kill time.'
I let out a long sigh between bites and take a sip of my coffee.
'If nothing else, I guess I could clean my apartment.' I mused, as I remembered that due to studying, I wasn't able to devote time to cleaning my apartment so its quite dirty.
'There is only so much time you can spend on cleaning. There will come a point where any more cleaning will be a complete waste of time. Then again wasting time is what you want is it not?'
'Whenever you say something smart, must you always follow it up with something stupid? There is a difference between wasting time and killing time.' I retort to the voice in my head exasperatedly.
'Because if I only say something smart, it would make you feel stupid.'
'So after I finish cleaning my apartment, what then?' I pondered as I continued eating my sandwich.
'You should play more vidoegames!'
'As I before, unless I get the motivation to start another set of playthroughs or a new game, no more videogames.' I mentally sigh. 'Maybe I should just get a job so I can earn some spending cash.'
'You're kidding right? You wouldn't last a week.'
'Gah' The three voices all going at once cause my head to start hurting.
'That is not true. He will last three months before getting let go due to lack of the level of skill required.'
After a few moments the pain receded and I could think clearly again.
'Thanks for the vote of confidence guys. Since you are part of my mind, I would have hoped you would have been more supportive.' The amount of sarcasm I put in my thoughts was quite a bit but unfortunately for me they don't understand sarcasm so it was wasted on them.
'To be fair, you don't seem like the type to be able to thrive as a corporate slave. In fact, I doubt you would even survive as a corporate slave.'
'When you put it that way, I can't really retort.' I mentally sigh. 'Just because I can't survive as a corporate slave doesn't mean I can't find employment.'
'True, but to a person who is unable to drive, and is unable to find a stable method of transportation, finding permanent employment does pose its own unique challenges.'
'I have complete faith in my ability to problem solve.' I think with false bravado.
'Then let's solve the most pressing problem, a stable means of transportation. How do you suggest we resolve that?'
'Normally I would say public transportation but as it happens this city has little in the way of public transportation, so that is unfortunately out. Next is to get a family member to drive me, but since I no longer live at home, it becomes a little unfeasible to rely on them so that is also out...'
'It just occurred to me, but wouldn't it be a lot easier to get a job if you learned how to drive first? So instead of trying to find employment this summer, you should instead spend it on learning how to drive?'
'Now that is a solid argument if I ever heard one, just one problem with it though.'
'What is that?'
'Dippy here, is a highly unmotivated piece of shit that only does things he finds enjoyable or is forced into doing in some way shape or fashion.'
'So we should put him in a situation where he is forced to how to drive?'
'Another excellent idea, only problem is that Dippy here, despite being a highly unmotivated piece of shit, is a highly intelligent, unmotivated piece of shit that is some how or another able to weasel his way out of even the most simplest of tasks.'
'Thank you very much.' I thanking him.
'That wasn't a compliment! See what I have to deal with?'
'Oh so now *I'm* the bad guy. I see how it is' I act as if I was falsely accused.
'So you are telling me that he hasn't learned how to drive because he hasn't felt like it?'
'Correct.'
'That settles it then doesn't it? He should spend his summer learning how to drive, that way he can at least drive him self places.'
'So your deciding things for me now? You may be part of my mind, but I'm the one in charge of this body, So begone!' I bellow at them inside my head. A few seconds later their presences were gone and I was finally left to my own devices.
'Alone at least, at least for the mean time.' I mentally sigh.
I don't recall when exactly my mind shatter into multiple pieces but I do know that I should be the main personality, and the other four are merely shells, annoying but not a threat to my claim over his body we share. "He" on the other hand, "He" poses a threat. So much so that I rallied the other four and manged to seal him deep within my subconscious. Hopefully the weight of all the depravity that I keep sealed deep inside my subconscious will keep him locked inside there, but I know its only a matter of time before he breaks free.
I take a sip of my coffee only to find it empty. I refocus on the world around me only to find that my lunch as well as my remaining coffee had already disappeared. Scrunching up the wrapper, I put it and my empty cup at the edge of my table for later disposal. I contorted my neck a little and after a series of satisfying pops, I retrieve my laptop bag that I stowed under the table.
I quickly remove and set up my laptop bag in a practiced manner as I have done it countless times during the semester. As I wait for it to turn on, I let my attention drift for a bit while I think about what I should do while I wait for my ride home.
As I mentioned before since I no longer live at home, it become exceedingly difficult to sway family members to go out of their way to pick me up for non school reasons at least, but I digress.
My attention is drawn to the conversation of two females, both were solid 7s but not my type, thus they were of no interest to me. What did interest me was their conversation. They were talking about the game the Annoyance was talking about earlier: Methodius Online. Since I practically live under a rock, my forays were limited to places where I must go to prolong my existence.
If I recall correctly, accord to Annoyance's sources, Methodius Online will be holding an open beta test soon that is open to everyone. While I might be interested in the game itself, and have plenty of free time right now, I'm pretty sure that the required dive equipment will be outside my nonexistent pay-grade. I simply couldn't afford such an expenditure.
Shrugging at the futility of this line of thought, I open up my preferred web browser and type "Methodius Online" in my search engine. I press enter and immediately a long list of sites appear that at least mention the game.
'I guess reading through everything here should kill enough time for my ride home to arrive?' I muse as I click on the first link which so happens to be the main website.
[3 hours later]
I take my hand off my laptop's mouse and crack my fingers again.
'I really shouldn't have forced my hand to do that so shortly after forcing it to write that long. Oh well.' As I flex my fingers waiting for the numbness to retreat I sigh in amazement. 'If just a quarter of what I've read about Methodius Online is true, then it will be quite amazing. I can almost pity myself for not being able to purchase the dive equipment, but self pity gets me nowhere.'
When the numbness finally retreats I open up a manga reader I frequent. Even though I just spent three hours reading everything remotely related to Methodius Online. I still haven't satisfied my reading craving.
Not only do I hear voices in my head, but I'm a reading addict. sometimes I spend entire days reading, even if it is the text of a game I'm currently playing. It's even caused me to learned how to read additional languages in pursuit of finding new reading materials. I think I'm up to five or six languages now? I can't speak a word of them but if it is in writing I can understand it clear as day. I know something is clearly wrong with me, but as I've been like this for a long time, I've gotten use to my quirks but I digress.
So I browse through the newly updated list to see if there is anything new. To date I've read hundreds of thousands of manga chapters of upwards of thousands of different series. Seeing some new chapters, I quickly 'consume', spelled consume but read as read, all the new chapters and with that the craving subsides enough that I can do other things.
'Good reading material is so hard to find now-a-days.' I mentally sigh. 'Oh that reminds me, maybe the public library has some new books available, and who knows, some of them might actually be a half decent read.'
Even though the craving just subsided, if I don't have some on hand, when it comes back, things will get ugly. The one time I tried to resit feeding the craving turned out pretty horrible for me, so I don't want a repeat of that.
I open up the home page of my local library branch as it is only a 30 minute walk from my apartment, it is well within walking distance, and start browsing through their new releases, looking for something that catches my eye.
A few minutes pass and only a few book catch my eye, I memorize their titles so I can could check them out later. After scanning the list twice more for anything else that drew my attention hen my smartphone began to vibrate.
I look at the caller ID and let out a sigh.
'What could be so important that he calls me instead of using Skype?' I wondered.
While I may live under a rock, thanks to the internet and the various online games I play, I do know quite a few people. Most of they stay at the acquaintance level while few the few that stay in contact with me throughout the years are people I consider 'friends' and most of them have similar interests as I do, but I digress.
This particular caller is someone who I've now for a long time and is a self proclaimed Asshole. But despite being an asshole, or maybe because of it, he is the second best player of the 'game' I've met since I've been alive. As he enjoys pushing other people's buttons in order to control them I need to be careful.
Steeling myself for the storm that is coming, I take a deep breath and slowly let it out. before answering my smartphone.
“Moshi moshi.” (Hello) I say with a Japanese accent.
Okay I lied when I said i couldn't speak a word of other languages. I know only enough to get me by if I'm traveling, but not enough to hold a serious conversation.
???: “Hello…?” A male voice comes through the speaker my smartphone.
"I'm sorry but I don't want to sigh any petitions, and I don't care about your religion." I continue in my Japanese accent.
"I don't have any money to give to your charity and none to afford escort services." I switch to a Chinese accent.
"I already voted, and I doubt I won the lottery." I switch to my Russian accent.
"Good day sir." I finish with my British accent. With that I hang up the phone and place it on the table.
'Ah that felt good, but knowing him he will be calling back shortly and sure enough not even five seconds pass when the smart phone started vibrating again.
“…” I remain silent as I answer the phone the second time.
???: “Hello?” The male voice says again over the phone.
“…” I remain silent, waiting for him to make the first move.
???: “Can you hear me?” Slight irritation can be heard in his voice.
“…” I remain silent for a while longer.
???: “I know you’re there.” His irritation is at its peak and now it is time to strike.
“What do you want Kyle?” I ask suspicion colored my voice.
Kyle: “What? Can’t I call a friend because I just wanted to talk?” He says suddenly taken back.
“If you wanted to talk you would have called me on Skype or text me to get on TeamSpeak. What are you planning?” I ask him out right because I know is acting suspicious.
Kyle: “Nope~ I’m not planning anything. Nope, not a thing, I just wanted to talk to my good ol’ buddy ‘Marth.'”
As 'Marth' is my internet handle, I am often referred as that by people who only know me through the internet, but I know from his voice that he is hiding something.
“Bullshit. We both know you are lying.” I call him out on his bullshit.
Kyle: “You don’t know that~, you can’t prove anything~” He says in a sing-song voice.
“Good bye Kyle.” I say softly and indifferently.
Kyle: “Wai…” He tries to stop me but I still hang up.
*click*
'I don't want any part in what he is planning, but unfortunately looking at past history, I'm probably gonna get swept up in it anyway.' I mentally sigh.
Continue Reading?No
Author's Note: I have completed my rewrite of this chapter, As I go through volume 2, I will be rewriting each of chapter of 24 to make it more in line with the new changes and hopefully they will be better written to show instead of tell you the story. To show that the rewrite is done, I'll be putting the volume in the title name: Volume 1: Chapter X [Title]
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