I guess I'm lucky enough to say that I come from a great family unit. I mean okay I have a few issues with my parents (Mostly my mother) but they've always been there you know. And I know how horrible my mom can be, and I know how much my father keeps silent when she does treat people nasty.

That said at the end of the day they are my parents, it was hard growing up with them as my mom and dad, also being a Vaughan.

This is why I'm glad I wasn't an only child; I have a great big brother. Ollie has always been there, I mean okay fair enough growing up we had the odd fights, I mean what siblings don't. But the one thing I can and could always count on my brother for is that he doesn't lie to me, he never has, and I don't think he ever would.

Not like our parents have, he's always called me out when I've been a Jackass, and he's always been honest about everything, for that I'm grateful.

Snapping out my thoughts and walked into my brother's house, without knocking like I always do. And made my way into the living room, just as my eyes land on my brother dressed like he's ready to go out.

"Are you going out?" I ask him, Ollie looks up at me and sighs in a guilty kind of tone.

"We had plans to watch the game tonight, didn't we?" Nodding my head and laughed a little.

"We did, but it looks like you got a better offer. Date night with Amanda?" I asked him, he looks at me sadly for a moment.

"Yeah sort of, we're having dinner with an old friend. Rain-check?" He said sounding guilty now, which I don't understand so he has to bail on our plans, it's not a big deal at all. I don't know why he looks so guilt, we were only watching a game? He's acting like he's committing a crime or something.

"No worries Bro! I will see you at the weekend for mom's posh dinner thing" I say and begin heading back towards the front door.

"Hi, can I ask you something?" I heard him say from behind me, turning back around to face my brother, and nodded.

"Go for it?" I replied, Ollie looks at me for a moment a little unsure of what to say next. Locking my eyes on him, something is off with him I can tell by the way he is acting; the thing is I just don't know what.

"Do you ever regret leaving Ella?" Oliver asked me suddenly, stopping dead in my tracks, and looked away from him for a split moment. And then I let my gaze travel back to my brother, keeping my stare on him.

Oliver and I haven't talked about Ella in five years, the last time we talked about her or should I say fought about her. Was when he found out about me leaving her and never looking back.

I mean he was angry.... pissed even and that was something you rarely saw in Oliver. Because he's always been quiet and mellow, a calm human being some would say.

But he cared for Ella like a brother to a sister, and he was very pissed-off when he learned that I walked out on her, because my could-be agent told me too. And for a while things weren't good between us, I have never seen disappointment in my brother's eyes towards me until that day.

"Why are you asking me that Ollie?" I hissed out at my brother; he looks at me sadly.

"Can you just answer the question?" He sighs to me, shaking my head.

"I don't want to talk about Ella. Why are you bringing all this up after what? Nearly five years?" I yelled at him.

I haven't mentioned Ella's name to anyone in years, I think of her all the time and almost every day, but I don't share that information with anyone else.

I don't like to talk about Ella, because I feel ashamed that I did what I did back then. That I walked away from her, for selfish reasons because I wanted something more, something better and I couldn't have that with Ella.

And after a few years, I realized what I did was wrong, and it was the biggest mistake of my life. But it's a mistake I can't fix and it's too late to fix it, no matter how much I want to, it's no longer possible and it wouldn't be fair to Ella now, she deserved an apology back then, not now.

I just hope she's happy because if anyone deserved to be happy it's Ella Snow.

"I'm sorry okay. I found a picture a few days ago from your eighteenth birthday, and it was a picture of you and Ella. And you just looked so happy and I guess I just haven't seen that for a while, and I just wondered if you wish it was different with her, that if you got a second chance would you take it?" He explained, shaking my head and rubbed my hands over my eyes for a second, before looking back at him.

"I wish it was different every day Ollie...I really do" I started to say, as my thoughts go back to her "And I wish I could say that I hurt her for her own good, that I did it to protect her, or I did it-;"

" so she could have a normal life. But I can't because I didn't, I did it for me, I did it because my dreams and what I wanted in life, mattered more. After all, I'm a selfish ass-;" I broke off for a moment and shook my head.

"I regret it Oliver, but it doesn't matter anymore because she's gone and there are no second chances for me and Ella. And I don't have the right to miss her or go looking for her to fix it either" I added sadly,

"You still love her, don't you?" My brother asked me, shaking my head and took a breath, before looking back at him.

"I will always love her, but what does it matter now. Look enjoy your dinner; I'll talk to you tomorrow" I snorted and then walked out of the house as fast as I could before Ollie could reply. Ignoring the thunder above me, and the rain coming down on me as I climb into my car.

Speeding off down the road and got lost in my own thoughts for a second or two.

Thinking about Ella always brings it all back and I hate it because she's the one that I let get away. She's the one that I walked away from and I hate myself for it every day.

I'm really pissed off that Ollie brought it all back to the surface again for me. And I feel like I can't handle this again, I just need to go for a long drive and clear my head and get my thoughts of Ella.

Finishing setting the dining room table and took a moment to gather my thoughts. My head is still telling me that this is a bad idea, letting anyone with the last name Vaughan near my daughter is a terrible move.

But my heart is telling me that Oliver can be trusted, and he's taking a big chance with his relationship with his brother, to keep my secret which he doesn't have to do. Which I think counts for a lot and I should trust him.

I'm scared and what mother wouldn't be? Especially with someone like Valerie she never liked me no matter how hard I tried.

And after a while, I honestly didn't care anymore, because if she wanted to look down her nose at me then fine, I still slept like a baby next to her son, so I was fine it didn't bother me.

But Remi she's innocent, she's just a little girl who doesn't understand how mean people can be. And as her mother, her parent all I want to do is protect her from anyone and anything.

"Mommy, who is coming for tea?" I snapped out of my thoughts as I heard Remi's voice ask me, turning around to smile at my daughter.

Walking over to her and nudged her to come and sit down on the sofa with me.

"You know like you always ask me, why it's only you, me, and Grandma. Why we don't have a big family?" I asked her, ever since Remi got older and started school. And she saw all the other kids with their moms and dads, also siblings. She always asked me why it was just the three of us, I used to tell her that,

"Us Snow girls are a small circle and that we've only ever needed each other"

But sometimes she still has more questions that I can't answer right now. Moving my eyes back towards her, just as she nods her head.

"Well you see you have two different families; you have me and Grandma from my side. But you always have family from your daddy's side, an uncle and a soon to be an auntie and they would really like to meet you, and that's who's coming to dinner tonight, they are called Oliver and Amanda" I try to explain to my daughter, hoping she understands what I'm trying to tell her, even though my own words don't make sense to me, so how is she supposed to understand them.

"Is my daddy coming too?" I heard my daughter whisper to me, for a moment my heart broke a little. I hate that she doesn't know Scott and I know that's my fault, but I'm just trying to protect her the best way I can do.

"No lady-bug, I'm sorry he's not" I mumbled sadly to my kid, who just wants to know her dad. Right now, I feel like the worst mom ever.

"Can I still meet my aunt and uncle?" Remi asked me still, pushing a string of hair out of her beautiful face, and smiled at the greatest thing in my world.

"Of course, you can" I replied to her with a smile. Remi looks at me and smiles back.

"I love you, mommy," She says before hugging her pink teddy unicorn to her chest, the same pink unicorn she had since the day, my mom gave it to her in the hospital, on the day she was born.

"I love you too now go and wash up before dinner" I replied and watched as she went off towards the bathroom.

It breaks my heart that she asks about her dad, and for a long time, I wish things were different for us. But Scott wanted his dream more than he wanted a future with me, and I doubt that would have changed if he knew about Remi back then.

At the time I did what I thought was right for my daughter and I don't regret it, but now years later I just don't know how to handle all the questions, that she has about her father. I don't have the answers for her either.

Pulling out of my thoughts as I hear the doorbell. Standing up from the sofa and smoothed down my dress and took a deep breath in and out, before making my way over to the door.

I'm putting all my faith in Oliver that he will keep my secret about Remi because I can't lose my daughter to the Vaughan's.

Especially to their mother, she would make it her life's mission to make me out to be a terrible parent and try to take her from me, and after keeping Remi a secret I don't think Scott wouldn't be on my side.

But I keep reminding myself that Ollie has done nothing to shake my confidence in him, and I owe it to Remi in some way that she can at least know where she comes from, other than just my side.

Pulling out of my own head and took another deep breath in and out, before opening the door with a forced smile.

Here we go...