《THOSE SUMMER NIGHTS》[15]
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You know the feeling of dread that you get when you know something is about to go terribly wrong? That's exactly the feeling I got when I woke up in Atlas's arms the following morning. I guess he felt it too because as soon as my eyes opened, we pushed each other away, not sparing each other any glances or words.
I didn't know what it was or why it happened, but my agitation towards Atlas shot up tenfold. I know it may seem like I'm bipolar or some shit, but that wasn't it. My feelings felt natural towards him... Like this was normal for us.
Well, I don't know about him, but for me, that was definitely the case.
That morning, I quickly got changed and hid in Leah and Julia's room. They were changed and ready to go downstairs for some breakfast, so that's what the three of us did.
When we arrived downstairs and had received our orders, we took a seat on the tables in the lobby. The morning bustle of the hotel played mindlessly in the background while Julia and Leah talked and ate.
I quietly chewed on my food.
"Eden?" Julia asked, snapping me out of my daze. I locked eyes with her and a look of worry passed over her face. I offered her a smile.
"Are you okay?" She asked.
Leah piped in, "Yeah, you've been incredibly quiet since... I don't even know when. Are you really okay?"
I nodded, letting out a small laugh, "Yeah, yeah. I'm fine. I promise."
Leah smiled, but Julia didn't seem convinced. I placed my fork down on the side of my plate, "So, how are you and Dawson, Leah?"
Her cheeks tinted red, "What?"
Julia giggled, "You think we haven't noticed?"
Leah focused back on her food, "There's nothing going on. Plus, he's moody and bipolar as fuck. Definitely not my type."
"Sure," I nodded along with her.
She rolled her eyes, fanning her face, "Enough about me. What about you, Eden?"
I gave her a confused look, "What about me?"
Julia snorted, "You and Atlas. You guys spent the whole day together yesterday and I didn't hear a peep, a complain, or a text from you."
Leah's eyebrows rose, "You too? Oh, my God, I was going to text, but I thought you guys were... busy."
My cheeks tinted red, "Oh, my God, no." I hid my face in my hands, "No, you guys, we were just hanging out, it's not like that, I swear."
Leah nodded her head, a smug smile on her face, "Sure,"
I rolled my eyes, "Atlas and I don't click. We- We're barely friends."
Julia frowned, "Fine, maybe it'll take some time. You never know."
Leah rolled her eyes, "Well, what about Hamza?"
My cheeks flamed red and Leah pointed a finger at me, "Aha! You're blushing!"
I rolled my eyes, Julia laughing beside Leah, "There's nothing going on with Hamza. We're just neighbors."
Leah raised her eyebrows as if she was saying Yeah, right. She stuffed some more food in her mouth, "Yeah, sure. He totally likes you and you're so crushing on him back."
I sighed, "I mean, yeah, he's sweet and funny, but like... No."
Julia smirked, "We'll see what happens."
I gave her a look, "I hate when you say vague things like that."
She laughed and Leah nodded, "It creeps me out, Mama Jules."
After a few minutes, the boys joined us for breakfast and we laughed and talked. Jude sat on my right while Atlas sat on my left. Dawson, Julia, and Leah sat across. I tried not to pay attention to the way Atlas's stare was burning a hole into the side of my head. I instead focused on eating like a normal human being and not dropping eggs onto my lap.
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"Oh, my God!" Leah squealed, "Atlas, has that tattoo always been there?"
I looked to my left and glanced at Atlas properly for the first time. He was dressed in a pair of black jeans and a short-sleeved, striped, black and white button-up. His hair was damp from his shower and his blue eyes were icy and light and rimmed with a thin sliver of dark blue. It looked so different.
I glanced down at his forearm and noticed the tattoo that wasn't there two nights ago. Along his forearm was a knife that looked to be about five inches long. The hilt was dark and looked to be leather and the blade was traced and jagged. I shivered at the sight of it. Engraved into the blade was a date: 04.21.21.
The tattoo was still red around the sides.
I looked up and my eyes locked with Atlas's. His eyes were devoid of any emotions other than bitterness and pain. I wondered what had happened in the last few hours that changed him and prompted him to get a tattoo.
He looked at Leah, "Yeah, I got it last night."
She glanced at him, "Can I see it?" Before he could tell her his answer, she grabbed his arm and jerked it towards her. She looked at it closely, "Wow, this is so nice. It's so pretty and scary."
Atlas's lips pulled into a frown and tucked his arm under the table when Leah finally let go. I looked up at Jude and frowned when I noticed that his eyebrows were furrowed and he was watching Atlas with a sort of caution.
Dawson spoke up, "Hey, I mean at least you didn't get something stupid like a Teletubby."
Julia laughed and Leah rolled her eyes, "Teletubbies are cool, Dawson."
He frowned, his upper lip curling in disgust, "They are creepy as fuck."
At that, Leah laughed, "Why did something traumatic happen to you when you were five including some Teletubbies?"
I zoned out of the conversation and glanced at Atlas who was silently picking at his food. I wanted to let him know that whatever it was he was going through was okay. That he'd be okay. But I felt that if I even let him know I was thinking about him, he'd get angry. So, I left it alone.
When we finished eating breakfast, we walked out of the double doors of the hotel. I called my Mom while we walked and let her know about what we were doing and what we did yesterday. She was happy to hear that I was having fun. Even Lydia said hello which made me kinda happy. I made a mental note to call my Dad later.
We were going to get on one of those big red tour buses and tour the city. On the list were Big Ben, Kensington Palace, Birmingham Palace, the Arch, and a bunch of other places I didn't remember the name of.
By the time the tour was all over and my legs were aching from the amount of walking I did, we decided to go back home and order some food. I was exhausted and didn't even know if I was able to go to the party tonight.
I sped up and walked next to Leah who was talking to Dawson and Atlas who were on her left. I, naturally, took her right.
I sighed, "Do we still have to go to that party tonight?"
Leah laughed for a long time, "There is no way you're convincing me otherwise."
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I groaned, "But Leah, my legs are in so much pain."
She patted my back, "You'll be okay."
With a groan, I realized that there was no saying her.
After we reached the hotel and had lunch, I plopped down on the ground in front of my open suitcase. Atlas was on the bed, staring at his laptop. He had his headphone plugged in and lights flickered across his face. He was probably watching something, I surmised.
I, on the other hand, was looking for a dress to wear to the party. What did British people even wear to house parties? Large coats and short dresses?
I pulled out every party dress I had packed and spread it out on the bed. Atlas glanced at me briefly but then turned back to his laptop. I rolled my eyes, glancing at all my dresses.
I could go simple with a short black dress or I could go crazy with the silver one. Then I had the red one and the navy one that choked my boobs half to death. With a huff, I grabbed the red one, deciding to play it classic, but eye-catching.
I threw all my dresses back on my suitcases and grabbed a new underwear set and a pair of heels. I walked into the bathroom and locked the door behind me. I quickly slipped out of my clothes and slipped into the clothes I had picked out. I stared at myself in the mirror and smiled. The dress looked nice.
It was silky and red and stopped right before my knees. The zipper went up halfway, but I couldn't get it past that. I groaned and decided to ignore it, for now, hoping that I wouldn't forget about it and be embarrassed by it later.
I decided to work on my hair and wanted to try a new look. I took my hair out of my bun and let it fall around me. I wet it with some water and ran a comb through my tangled hair. I glanced in the mirror and grimaced. I looked like a wet dog getting ready to go clubbing. I continued.
I brought out my bag of hair products from under the sink and unzipped it. I applied product after product and curled my hair with the hair-curler-thing until it came out the way I wanted. I smiled.
My hair now fell down in damp curls that made it look like I belonged at a beach party. With a smile, I got working on my makeup. Deciding to keep it as simple as possible, I applied some foundation, concealer, mascara, and some red lipstick. I glanced at my makeup bag again. What if I...
Without thinking about it again, I grabbed the pen and dotted some freckles on the bridge of my nose. I nodded proudly in the mirror. I looked good.
But with the shake of my head, I realized that I didn't want to wear the red dress anymore. I looked weird. I turned towards the door.
"Atlas?" I called out.
No response.
I called out his name louder and this time he responded, "What?"
"Can you get me the black dress that's on top of my suitcase?" I asked, pouting slightly, "Please!"
I pressed my ear to the door and heard some shuffling and smiled. I waited for him to knock. When he did, I opened the door open a peek, and grabbed the dress from his hand, "Thanks!"
I shut the door and shimmied out of my dress and crawled into the black one. I glanced at the mirror and nodded.
"Damn, you look good!" I told myself, but just like the last dress, the zipper wouldn't close. I cleaned up in the bathroom and unlocked the door again, walking out.
Atlas was by the bed, buttoning up a white button-up, but he stopped when he saw me. I watched as his lips parted and a loose curl falls in front of his face. His blue eyes ran down my body and legs and trailed back up to my face. I felt my body burn up under his eyes.
I got closer to him, dropping my heels on the floor, "Uh, can you zip me up?"
I brushed the loose curl from his face, he nodded and I turned around. I shivered as I felt his cool fingers touch the base of my back and finger the zipper. My eyes shut on their own.
A small gasp left my lips as I felt his fingers trail down my shoulder blades, his silver rings stinging my skin. I bit my lip and waited for him to hurry and zip the stupid dress up. I didn't think my legs would be able to keep me up any longer.
I felt his hands hold onto my shoulders, his grip strong and heavenly. With a sudden movement, his other hand pulled up the zipper to the edge of my dress. It got quiet for a moment and he let go. I turned around.
"Thank you," I breathed out, unable to fully use my voice. He nodded, his eyes stopping at my chest and running down my legs. I grabbed my heels and turned around before he could see how red my cheeks were.
I sat on the edge of the bed and slipped my heels on, not sparing a glance at Atlas. When I was done, I quickly got up almost toppling over and cracking my head on the TV stand. I took a breath and grabbed my purse, walking out of the hotel room.
-
When we finally arrived at the party, it was in full swing. People were dancing in the backyard to the loud music pounding from inside the house. Others were drinking on the roof, some were making out with strangers, and others were passed out by the door.
I shuffled closer to Jude who was standing to my right. He looked down at me and smiled, slinging his arm over my shoulder.
"So are you getting blackout drunk tonight?" He asked and I laughed.
"Hell, no. I'm just gonna get a little buzzed."
He nodded, "Well, I'm the designated driver for tonight so if you want to let loose..."
I nodded, smiling widely, "If I do decide to get drunk, make sure to watch out for me. I tend to forget where I am and end up talking to random people about the meaning of life."
He laughed, "Will do,"
We walked through the doors of the house and I let out a low whistle. The house was huge and beautiful. I mean, aside from the drunk teenagers all over the place and the pungent smell of body weed, it was nice.
I smiled as Leah took my hand and pulled me to the kitchen, Julia not far behind. The boys followed us, but Atlas, I noticed walked the other way. I pushed him out of my head.
Leah shoved a drink in my hand and I sniffed it, "Tequila?"
She nodded and I downed the whole cup, letting the liquid scorch the back of my throat. I coughed a little and let out a laugh. Leah smiled, proudly as Julia threw back a matching cup.
Julia and I watched as Leah threw back her head as she downed a cup, too. After that, she grabbed the bottle and filled her cup to the brim, sipping from it every few seconds. Dawson smirked and walked behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist.
"I didn't know you drank like a maniac." He laughed.
She smirked and turned her head to look at him, "Well, I am."
Leah turned to us, "Now, go away. Go find someone to dance with but don't stray too far."
Julia saluted Leah and hooked her arm with mine and dragged me to the makeshift dance floor. We started to dance amidst the sweaty bodies. Julia laughed as she watched me shake my arms and hips to the beat of the song. She mimicked me and I laughed at how stupid she looked.
We danced next to each other for a long time. New drinks were in our hands and we were distracted by the loud hum of the music in the background Sweat was dripping down my back and chest and my legs ached from the constant movement. I told Julia I needed to go to the bathroom. She gave me two thumbs up.
I stumbled my way upstairs and walked into the bathroom a few feet down the hall. Thank God nobody was in there. Brushing my hair from my face, I walked in and was about to shut the door, but was stopped by a hand holding it open.
I looked at the guy in front of me and blinked once then twice. I didn't know whether it was the alcohol talking, but the guy was handsome. He was tall and had broad shoulders to match. His blonde hair was sweaty and matted to his face, probably just like mine. His brown eyes looked ghostly under the bathroom's fluorescent lights.
I downed the rest of my drink and catapulted it behind him. He smirked at me and lifted my chin to meet his eyes. I smiled sheepishly.
"You know, the term the eyes are the window to the soul. I think I finally get it. It makes so much sense, you know? Like if you look into someone's eyes you can almost see how much pain and suffering they've experienced. And sometimes when you look into someone's eyes you can see nothing but innocence and purity. What I would do to go back to being innocent, but I can't. Like why can't your eyes just be visible to someone who'll look into your pained eyes and try and fix it? Not to any random who'll just look and-"
"Hey," The guy in front of me snapped me out of my word spill. I smiled. He didn't have a British accent, I found myself thinking through my drunken haze.
"Hi, I'm Eden,"I said to which he smiled.
"I'm... Aaron. And, my God, Eden, I want to fuck you too good." He smirked, moving his face closer to mine. My cheeks flushed red, but I pushed him back.
"I'm..." My lip trembled, but I held back the tears. I smiled instead, "I'm a virgin."
Aaron frowned, "Well, we can change that if you'd like."
His hand found my hips and he roughly pulled me closer to him, grinding his hard-on into me. I tried not to gag and, once again, pushed him away. He stumbled a little and he looked at me in disgust. I stuck my tongue out at him and he rolled his eyes, adjusting his pants as he walked back downstairs.
A tear slipped from my eye, but I quickly brushed it off. And in the next second, my legs shook ad I fell onto my knees, a sharp pain piercing each of them.
"Fuck," I cried out, sitting back and staring at my knees. Each of them was red and the one on the right was dripping blood. I winced. What did I land on?
I looked at where I had fallen and winced. The little metal strip that held the door had two screws coming out of it. I banged one knee on the left screw and cut skin with the one on the right. I huffed.
I moved to get up but faltered as someone stopped in front of me. I looked up to see Atlas and I smiled sheepishly at him. He rolled his eyes and crouched down to my level.
He snaked his arms around my waist and the other under my knees and lifted me up. He walked into the bathroom and placed me on the counter, shutting the door behind him.
I looked at him. His eyes were dim and his eyebags looked deeper than mine. His hair was a disheveled mess and he moved around sluggishly.
"Are you drunk?" I whispered, slurring slightly, "Cause if you are there's no shame in that. I'm drunk too and if you hadn't noticed I talk a lot when I'm drunk. I can talk about anything and everything, believe me-"
"Fuck, shut up." He said, "I believe you, goddammit."
I giggled and watched as he examined my knees. He opened the cabinet under the sink and pulled out a first aid kit. I giggled.
"Fix me, Dr. Atlas."
He glared at me and that was enough to shut me up. I watched as he opened the first aid box and grabbed the bottle of Hydrogen Peroxide and cotton balls. He opened the bottle and set it aside.
He moved my thigh outwards a little, but I wouldn't open them more. I hope he understood and/or wasn't a pervert.
His eyes locked with mine, "Spread your legs. You cut the sides."
With my cheeks burning hotter than the sun, I pulled my dress down a little and spread my legs for him. I tried not to think about how weird this was.
I watched him wet the cotton balls with Hydrogen Peroxide and set them aside. His hand gripped my thigh causing me to let out a gasp. My hand grabbed onto his shoulder. He frowned at me in question.
"Your rings are cold." I bit out.
He nodded and picked up the cotton balls and started to dab the cut with them. I took in a sharp breath, gripping his shoulder even tighter. I squeezed my eyes shut from the sting.
Atlas continued to clean up my knees and I tried not to curse at him every time he'd grip my thigh. Was there really a need for that?
When he was done disinfecting the cut, he placed a bandage on each knee that looked really stupid. I let out a laugh.
"I look stupid," I giggled which bubbled into an even longer laugh until my stomach started to hurt. Atlas looked at me like I was crazy. When he packed up the First Aid box and cleaned up the mess, I got up but stumbled into Atlas. I winced as he held me up against him. I looked up at him.
His eyes were dull and emotionless, but I wondered where the twinkle in his eyes that I had seen yesterday went. It was gone. Like they never existed in the first place.
His breath fanned against my face and it smelt like lemons and coke. His lips were barely two inches away from mine and I wondered what they tasted like.
"I bet your lips taste like coke." I blurted out.
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