New Year, new me. That's a popular phrase uttered by everyone, but that doesn't mean that I can't live up to it.

I couldn't take it. I was losing sleep over the fact that you owed me so much money and were getting away with it. I had to take action. With my lawyer's advice and the knowledge he provided me, I went called the District Court. $200 and change later, the complaint was filed, and the court notice was sent your way. Did you know I was having the same reoccurring nightmare every week for moths at that point?

We were always in a different house, but the story line was always the same. We would end up in your bedroom, breaking up over and over again no matter how much I fought to keep us together. Then, I would be forced out while watching the baby tearfully watch, not knowing why I was abandoning him with his shitty family.

The thought of having to see you for the first time in months sickens me, and brings back horrible memories. You yelled at me constantly. You pressured me into smoking weed every night to put me to sleep because I'm a 'restless sleeper'. You just didn't like that I'm a cuddle bug, admit it. You let me lay on the shit and piss covered hardwood floor because you were mad at me the night before move in. Every night I stayed there you made me sleep on your absolutely filthy bed, covered in your dog's period blood, your semen, your blood, your sweat, your sister's sweat, whatever the baby dropped on the bed, cigarette ash, burn marks, and I don't even know what else. I still don't know why you never purchased sheets or washed the ones I gave you.

I hope after you received the notice in the mail that you had nightmares. I hope I am your worst nightmare, which is why 'Nightmare' by Halsey was my attitude for the entirety of January.