The four of us, now awake and rested, meet at an impromptu campground the next day. Elder Bones did his best to make benches out of rolled logs that he spent all morning carving into something slightly more comfortable. He had Dagger’s help in that endeavor which was surprisingly useful with a little instruction.

It was my and Spoon’s job to gather what we could for a fire. Spoon was NOT useful for this task, and I spent most of the time making multiple trips to carry anything flammable. She didn’t know what sticks to grab, why I insisted on grabbing more than we needed, or why I needed rocks. It was very irritating, but eventually, between a place to sit and a low fire, we started the hallmarks of goblin civilization.

Now we sit in silence, looking at each other with various expressions. I’m apprehensive, not knowing which question I want to ask first and dreading the answers. Spoon and Dagger seem happy to be here, and Elder Bones is deep in thought.

Here is the basic problem, I don’t know how to be a thief. Do I start stealing from humans? Other goblins? What do I steal? Something valuable to humans? Or to Goblins? Well, if it’s Goblins, I’d like food. Chickens, crunchy carrots, even the occasional apple. My mouth waters at the image of an apple, slightly watered, left in a barrel with other apples. Or those times the humans cover their apples in that sweet smelling brown substance that—

“ROCK!” Elder Bones shouts, interrupting me from my daydream.

“Yes Elder! Hmmm…. Ummm what were we talking about?”

Elder Bones shakes his head, his face saying he regretted every decision that led him to this moment before a new expression, a firmer, more resolved one takes over. “We weren’t talking about anything yet! Unlike like these two”—he points at Spoon and Dagger—“you can’t afford to daydream.”

Spoon huffs, Dagger continues to daydream.

“Well, I don’t know what you want me to do!”

Elder smiles. “Have a plan, young Goblin!”

“I-” My mouth goes before I shut my mouth.

A plan? Me? Plans are for Chiefs! Plans are for Squad Leaders! Plans are for—

My mind makes a random count of the 4 goblins, including myself.

Dagger is a Level 1 Raider.

Spoon is probably a Level 1 Shaman.

And Elder Bones is Level 4, but Elders never leave the mountain. That would make me a…

No. No. NO. NO. NO. NO!!

“A Squad Leader,” my lizard brain whispers. The part of the Goblin that just knows. Who the Chief is. Who the Elders are. And who I am. I want to run back to Chieftain Chief and beg for forgiveness. I want to cry on his feet in slobbering repentance, begging to be accepted back as a Raider. Begging to-

Begging to do something I hated.

I stand tall and straight, loincloth flapping in the wind as it blows in from the mountain. Spoon shies her eyes away from my visage, and Elder Bones’ eyes light up, seeing my newfound purpose. I am a Goblin Thief. I hit Dagger with a Rock to get here (going to apologize for that later). I hit Chief with his own staff to get here. And now I’m a Goblin Squad LEADER!

“We ROB HUMANS!”

Elder Bones smiles.

“WE ROB MANY HUMANS!”

Dagger laughs!

“And we spread GOBLIN SUPREMACY!”

Spoon cheers before Elder Bones interrupts with a timely ahem before speaking in a low yet clear voice, “And how exactly are you going to do that?”

Full of my own superiority, I march toward the edge of the plateau that separates what I’m now calling Rock’s Thieves Ground from the sparse trees and thickets that dot the mountain below and point to a single dot in the horizon that blazes with the telltale light of a human settlement.

“We rob them first!”

******************

Elder Bones doesn’t want to tell Rock he is heading toward a human city. He doesn’t want to discourage the making of a real leader. But he wishes Rock would look at a map first! There is easier prey for a young thief than a human city with trained guards and worse, Thieves Guilds. But he is proud of the youngling.

Besides, there are lessons, hard lessons Rock has to learn on his own. This wasn’t like raiding, where a bunch of Goblins gather together and decide on a general direction to rob and kill. This requires finesse, timing, and a sense for danger he can’t teach.

And with Rock gone, the Elder can focus on repairing the grounds around the former “Thief” area. Since before the current Chief was a Chieftain, it has always been a tradition to house the various goblin classes in different parts of the village. It is only unfortunate that the lack of young Goblins picking Thief had decreased to such a level that much of the grounds were reclaimed by the surrounding wilderness. Which makes them vulnerable to opportunistic Giant Rats and other less friendly monsters that hide in the surrounding wilderness.

So Elder Bones relishes the time alone doing manual labor and exercising old bones accustomed to directing others. He at least enjoys doing most of these tasks before Dagger volunteers to help…. Elder shudders, thinking about the effort it takes to direct the eager Goblin…