Xie Yi-jun

2004 years after The Long Night

Wúmeng

In the hopes of finding something familiar, something that might remind him of his old life, Xie Yi-jun wandered through Wúmeng in the early hours of the morning after being unable to sleep. Something was weighing on him. And it wasn't just loneliness or despair. He wasn't sure what it was. That feeling of wrongness stayed with him most of the day, torturing him.

Following the sound of running water, he ended up in a part of the forest east of town. Seven centuries ago Wúmeng stretched out even further than this, now all that was left of the old pathways, buildings and houses, were a few decrepit ruins and stone archways.

Songcai had loved coming to the outskirts, since all the children and families would rush out of their homes, waving and smiling at him, inviting him in or offering tea. Yi-jun had seen it happen countless times. It wasn't just because Songcai had been a skilled and well-known healer, but also because he was kind to everyone he met.

Yi-jun placed his hand over the side of what used to be a wall, feeling the cold stone and wet moss that now grew there, marking the passing of years. Beneath his feet, roots and vines tangled together, the old town having become part of the forest again. The young King couldn't bear to remember the faces of those that had lived here, how they died, completely innocent to a war that he'd lost after using their help. What right did he have to be here now? It may have been Songcai's home, but Yi-jun was the one who had let it fall into ruin...

He stayed there for several minutes, listening to the nearby stream and the sound of the birds in the trees. There were no calls to come see the famous healers from the city, no laughter, no crying babies or crackling fires. No one left for Songcai to heal, and no one for Xie Yi-jun to attempt to save.

Recalling the way his lover used to mend wounds, physical and spiritual alike, Xie Yi-jun suddenly thought of the other day. The day he saw Wen Reian do the same...

From what he understood, the boy was not trained in such magic. It was plausible Wen Reian healed his friend's injury spontaneously due to the adrenaline and danger of the situation, but the innate ability to heal was something so rare it was almost unheard of.

Yi-jun remembered Songcai telling him about it...

"We're mostly born blank-slates,"

"Then how are all of your ancestors healers?"

Jin-cai shrugged, "It's what we know. The knowledge has been passed down to each generation, and that's how it was passed down to me."

Xie Yi-jun blinked at him.

"What about those that are born with special talents?"

Songcai smiled, his eyes shining; "Maybe one in a thousand will have such a gift, I myself do not. What you see is centuries of wisdom, years of practice and failure and studying. We don't all become Kings in a day..."

Then how did Wen Reian?

Mindlessly walking through the ruins of an old building, stumbling over roots and catching the branches overhead, Xie Yi-jun continued toward the sound of the water. Without realising, he'd come upon the remains of an altar, the structure around him the skeleton of a church. He vaguely remembered one at the edge of town, used for ceremonies and offerings. Where one might have stood to receive a blessing, now a river ran through the ground, dividing the church in half.

Despite the fact that the world he'd once known had been reduced to such bones, Yi-jun saw life flourishing all around him. Everywhere; green and blooming, creatures hunting or hiding or just existing in the silent graves of the people that once lived here.

What a beautiful place to lay to rest. If Yi-jun was even half-lucky he'd end up in a place like this. The thought was only a happy one, since death was now his last chance of seeing Jin-cai again. Perhaps they'd be together in the afterlife, or just exist as trees in the same forest. Such a fate was much more than he knew he deserved, yet he still hoped.

Leaving the church, the King walked down the bank, following the stream. Ahead he saw more stone walls covered in vines, the river running by them. Yi-jun only realised someone was sitting beside the wall when he caught sight of the boy's violet robes...

Wen Reian was alone, crouched by the water, stirring a stick through it and watching the ripples it made. Yi-jun found his daydream-expression quite sweet, deciding to stand there and watch for a little while...

The boy's dark hair fell over one shoulder, nearly touching the river. He'd rolled his sleeves up and Yi-jun felt something stir in his heart when he heard Reian humming to himself.

He wouldn't want me to be here, surely-

Yi-jun knew he hadn't been all that kind to the boy since they'd met. But the strangeness of their first encounter had felt like such a huge thing to him as he tried to sort through where he was.

The fact that Wen Reian was not Jin-cai could not be helped. Yi-jun wasn't sure how he knew the boy wasn't him, it was the same as how he knew the exact color and feeling of Songcai's aura even before he entered a room. Reian's was different. Jin-cai's soul wasn't here on this earth anymore. That was as clear to Yi-jun as the ache in his heart when he thought of his lover.

Nevertheless, Reian had been the one to wake him up. The boy had a sense of something oddly comforting, something familiar. The way his energy had eased Yi-jun's hurt that first night, how quickly it did... the boy was a mystery, and yet in that brief moment, Yi-jun stopped feeling everything with his heartbreak and used his heart instead. Even though Yi-jun's aura was sealed and he was from a time before Reian's grandparents were born, it felt like Reian understood.

Thinking about how he'd played in the spring with the boy, a sense of ease settled in Yi-jun's heart, recalling Reian's laughter and radiant eyes, his screams as he'd thrashed away and splashed water at him... the King hadn't been so carefree in years, not even with Songcai, as they'd met after the war had already begun. Yi-jun wished to see Reian's smile again, his real one when he wasn't being polite or glaring playfully at his friends.

Perhaps if the King was able to separate his confusion and pain over losing Songcai from the rest of himself, he and Reian could have a chance at being friends. The boy was definitely mature for his age, and even if he was still a boy, that was okay. Yi-jun was immature-

As he began to back away slowly, deciding it was time to leave Wen Reian to himself, Yi-jun's heel suddenly caught on a tree root. Arms flailing out to grab onto anything, the King thanked his lucky stars on his way down that Jin-cai hadn't been here to see his sudden clumsiness...

Ah hell, who am I kidding? Songcai has seen me do much worse-

With handfuls of leaves he'd pulled off of the trees above him, Yi-jun sat up and shook his head. The whole thing had been relatively silent, he thought, but when he glanced over at the bank Wen Reian was staring at him, blinking in surprise.

Xie Yi-jun sighed, standing up and brushing his hands on his clothes before he carefully approached the boy.

"I was hoping to sneak away before you noticed me, but clearly stealth is not one of my strong suits," Yi-jun sat down beside Reian and realised the boy was still staring.

It's just because my aura is sealed. It's inhibiting my powers and draining my energy-

"What?" Yi-jun looked at the boy, "Do you want to be alone?"

Wen Reian's wide eyes blinked again and he shook his head.

"No, but... what are you doing here?"

The King grabbed a twig off the ground and dipped it in the stream, mimicking Reian. He swirled it around a few times but it just muddied the water so he stopped.

"Touring my memories. And you?"

Beside him he thought he saw the boy swallow, almost nervously, so Yi-jun let the stick he was holding go, moving away slightly and putting some distance between them.

Reian answered; "Just taking a moment to think. Back home there's never a spare second, never any peace. I'm never alone. I'm practicing,"

"Practicing being alone?"

Reian nodded, "Yes. It's so quiet..."

He said this with a shy smile, and suddenly words were spilling from Yi-jun's lips, things from his past he'd nearly forgotten.

"Growing up I was always alone..."

"How can that be?"

The man shrugged, "I don't mean in terms of people. Yes, there was always someone close by; an instructor, or a guard or a servant. I was never alone, but often lonely. It's the difference between being surrounded by people that love and know you, versus those that only see you for your title. I wasn't allowed to have friends, only those my mother approved of."

Reian huffed, "Well that sounds terrible! Why?"

Xie Yi-jun smiled thinly, looking at the boy with his wide dark eyes...

"How much would you say you know about the era in which I'm from?"

Reian just shook his head, "Not very much."

The young King leaned back on his hands, tilting his face up to the sky and closing his eyes. It had been a long time since he'd thought of any of this. For some reason he wished to tell it to Reian.

"Do you want to know-"

"Yes."

The boy answered before he'd even finished his sentence. Yi-jun wasn't used to people interrupting him, but from Wen Reian it seemed sweet and innocent so he just smiled.

"Alright... What you must know first is that my mother's claim to power was highly disputed. She was a villager from Zuótiãn, a small town outside Hêi'àn City, and not of royal blood. After my father died many people demanded that she step down and turn over power to my father's younger brother. She did not. I remember her saying that the only reason she wasn't killed during those months after my father died, was because she was pregnant with me. No one could defend killing a Prince. The fact that I was half-blood came up every now and then, but it was a topic tiptoed around very carefully. My mother ruled under constant threat from allies and enemies alike, never wavering in her belief that I would someday become King.

"Once, dissidents in Hêi'àn City hired assassins from Nañbu Daoyu. Not to kill her but to kill me. Over the years I've been attacked in my sleep, kidnapped, stabbed just walking down the street, talked about and laughed about more times than I'd care to admit. But because of my mother, I had no other choice but to live the life she wanted.

"I do love my city, and it wasn't all terrible. I think I was probably better than nothing to the common-man. Not pure-blood but also not incompitant. Over the years as I began coming into power, less and less I'd hear my name whispered through the halls. Unfortunately I was terrible when it came to trusting too easily, so I was guarded 24/7... my mother's orders. She died from a heart disease when I was nineteen and I was crowned on my twentieth birthday. Ten months later, the war began and I had no choice but to fight in it. Meng Bai and his ever-growing army was a threat to our very existence. The problem was I kept trusting the wrong folks, first him and then an endless amount of people that finally had an excuse to remove the half-blood King from the throne.

"I think I lost more of my people to the other side, fighting against our way of life, than I ever did to any battle. I don't know if it was all bad timing, an excess of terrible souls, or just the fact that I really am a bad leader, but after a dramatic year full of losses I couldn't afford, my world turned on its axis. Hêi'àn City has always been peaceful, only defending itself. Meng Bai was not just a threat to us, but to life everywhere. Leaders from other clans were taking notice, and Xuêshan and Wúmeng eventually offered soldiers and aid. That was when... when I met him. Anyway, you probably know the rest. I won a lot, and failed a lot more. Xuêshan were in the middle of a crisis themselves and returned home shortly after. Those from Wúmeng stayed 'till the bitter end. A choice that would seal their fate...

"At the end of it all, I was truly watching the world crash and burn around me. One last chance to turn Meng Bai's army of several thousand around, yet I had three hundred men and no supplies. The plan was to catch them off guard at the road between Darkling Pond and the foot of Hêi'àn City. We camped there for months and waited for them to pass, constantly sending out scouts. It was on one of these missions I was attacked and taken to Xi Qiáng forest. I guess after I'd been cursed, Meng Bai was able to attack Hêi'àn City from both sides, sealing them in. Master Hao told me how he exploded Hong Zuí, but I doubt such a small volcano could completely destroy everything. My guess is he used the underground lava tubes as well. The entire city must have caved in on itself when the ground fell away, and after it was defenseless, Meng Bai went straight to Wúmeng and destroyed that too. He was a cruel coward and blinded by jealousy.

"There are rules in a war, he broke all of them. My people, his people, everyone paid for it. I didn't pay enough. I slept through the death of my city and now here I am, alive and breathing in fresh air while their bodies lay trapped hundreds of meters deep in the earth. Sometimes I do wonder what would have happened if I had been killed as a child, or even before I was born. Maybe my uncle or someone else could have led better, and my home would still be there. I can't go back and try again. Even if I could, I'm not sure I am capable of making better choices. I did all I could and it wasn't enough. It wasn't all my fault, I know, but if I was one of the ones that died that day, I would probably blame me an awful lot-"

Xie Yi-jun stopped when he heard Reian make a soft sound, like a sigh. Looking over at the boy, the King realised with a panic that he was crying!

I suppose it is a sad story...

Without thinking, the King took his sleeve between his fingers and carefully held it to Reian's cheek as the boy stared at the ground.

"That's..." Reian whispered.

Wen Reian glanced up, his eyes wet and overflowing with tears. His shaky voice made Yi-jun frown. Slowly, he let go of his sleeve and touched the boy's face with the back of his hand.

"I didn't mean to make you cry,"

Reian stayed still. Yi-jun felt the softness and warmth of his skin. He dried every tear, and then realised he had been doing so for far longer than seemed appropriate. When he went to pull away, Reian suddenly caught his hand. Holding it in both of his, the boy stared into Yi-jun's eyes and said with utmost sincerity;

"I wish that hadn't happened to you."

No I'm sorry, no I hope you can move on, just... I wish you didn't have to endure that.

Having said so much and seen so much honesty from both himself and Wen Reian, Yi-jun felt his heart ache. His aura was alive and beating within him, desperate to be free so it could feel the entirety of his emotions, but Yi-jun feared if that happened, he truly might collapse and be lost forever to the pain.

He took a few deep breaths, focused on steadying his heart, and released Reian's hands with a grateful smile. He didn't regret sharing that with him, only that the story had made him so upset. Yi-jun had hated seeing Reian cry. He wished only to see him laugh...

Taking a bright blue feather from the ground and twirling it between his fingers a few times, Xie Yi-jun was struck with a memory of following Jin Songcai around this very forest, whistling and causing all sorts of problems for the young healer. Jin-cai put up with everything, only getting frustrated with Yi-jun when he got hurt or sick...

Taking the feather in his hand, the King placed it behind his ear, something he hadn't done in nearly seven hundred years. When he did, he saw Reian smile.

The light in the boy's eyes was so comforting, Yi-jun ended up smiling too, leaning back with his arms behind his head and closing his eyes. He could remember a time when he still hoped for more. When Songcai would find him sleeping like this in the forest and take the feather out from behind his ear, only for Yi-jun to find another.

I did anything back then to get his attention, he recalled shyly.

For the first time in a long time, Xie Yi-jun felt content. With the sound of the stream and the animals in the forest, Wen Reian's gentle breathing and the familiarity of the boy's presence warming him, Yi-jun fell asleep, his last thought being that perhaps he did find something of home afterall.