- Saturday, February 7th, 2015-

– One year ago –

‘Would you consider coming to my birthday party?’ I watch as Finnley puts away a couple of books, putting them in his backpack for Monday. ‘I miss hanging out with you.’

‘I’m busy, you know I have to study.’ Finnley looks at me, laying on his bed, while he just finished his homework. ‘And I don’t like to go to parties.’

‘For once?’

‘We’ll hang out tomorrow,’ he tells me with a small smile. ‘I kept my schedule clear to hang out with you. We’ll do whatever you want.’

‘I want you to come to my party.’

He simply shakes his head and his smile fades in a matter of seconds. ‘I’m not going to a party Cris.’

‘Okay,’ I admit my defeat. I know I have no leverage to talk him into coming, so I’ll let this pass, again. ‘We’ll hang out tomorrow. But after the weekend, we need to start working on your social life. This is becoming a little depressing.’

‘What is?’ He frowns at me, crossing his arms. ‘I’m perfectly fine with the way my life is right now.’

‘We’ve had this conversation a thousand times already. But you don’t know any better.’ I sit up straight and grin. ‘You need to stop reading stories in books, start writing your own.’

‘Sounds like those words didn’t originally come from you.’

‘I might have stolen them from internet,’ I admit with a smirk. ‘But it’s true. You’re not really living. I get it it’s important to secure your future. But what’s life without friends? Without a wife and kids? Because if you go on like this, you’ll end up alone.’

‘I’ll always have you, right?’ He frowns, I groan in annoyance.

‘Finn, I’m serious. Are you really happy with your life? For real?’

‘Well, no.’ He shrugs, looking down. ‘I’d love to be more like you, but I made a choice in school and I can’t just back out because it’s less fun.’

‘But you could combine them. You don’t haveto study every night.’ I get up from the bed a little hopeful. ‘One free night a week. One night hanging out with me, Emma, our friends.’

‘You know I don’t like drinking.’ The doubt is evident in his voice, in his posture.

‘So, we don’t drink.’ I put my hands on his shoulder and shake him slightly, before letting go again. He’s looking right at me, while I’m looking hopeful. ‘Just have a little fun for once. You’re way too stressed for a fifteen-year-old.’

He groans and lolls his head backwards, sighs exasperatingly. ‘Okay, fine, but just this once.’

‘Awesome! That’s the only gift I could ask for!’

‘So, I can return my birthday gift for you?’

My eyes widen in shock. ‘Did you buy me a gift?’

‘Off course I did, but I was planning on giving it you tomorrow.’ He simply shrugs. ‘And since the only gift you could wish for is my presence at your party, I’ll just return it to the store.’

‘No!’ I’m way to curious as to what Finnley got me. ‘I’d like another gift.’

‘Don’t get greedy Cris.’ He winks at me and starts rummaging through his drawers. For a second I think he’s grabbing my gift, but then he just pulls out clean clothes. ‘You can only have one gift.’

‘But you’re my best friend!’ I follow him around the room with my eyes, flopping back down on the bed. ‘You’re supposed to give me two gifts.’

‘You never got me two gifts.’

‘You never throw a party that I can attend to as a gift.’

‘Oh please,’ he snorts. ‘If I were to throw a party you’d love to be there. Especially if Julia would be there.’

‘Oh!’ I bounce up and down on the bed. ‘Maybe you could invite her!’

‘She’s away for the weekend, sorry.’

‘Oh, well. In that case you’ll have to entertain me and make sure I won’t go around and hit on other girls.’

‘What?’ Finnley chokes in his own breath by surprise. ‘You’re not going to hit on someone?’

‘Well, first of all, I just said we won’t be drinking. You’re my best friend and you’re finally coming to a party, myparty, and I feel obligated to make sure you have a nice evening. Second of all, I decided to solely focus on Julia.’

‘Well, that’s…’ – Finnley cocks a brow – ‘so not you.’

‘I’m full of surprises.’

He rolls his eyes at that remark, before heading over to the bathroom. ‘I’m taking a shower and then we can go to your house to set up for the party.’

‘You’re coming to help me?’

‘I wouldn’t be your best friend if I didn’t.’

‘Right, you’re the best.’

* * * * *

Okay, so I broke my promise to Finn not to drink. But without him knowing, I’ve been slipping Bacardi into his cola the whole evening. It’s not that much, but since Emma made him take two shots of Tequila too, it’s enough to notice for a sober person. But there’s something bugging me ever since Finnley got out of the shower a couple of hours ago. He dressed up for the party. Finnley is a kind of guy that wears regular jeans, a little lose but not baggy, with a simple tshirt and some hoodie when it’s cold. Tonight, he decided to wear some fancy looking jeans I’ve never seen before, and a nice shirt on top, which isn’t in his regular color or style; white or black. It’s with a print on it and he even styled his hair. Finnley looks… hot. Not that I think he is, but the girls are all over him.

Finnley is tipsy, but not drunk enough to enjoy to attention, so he’s been shielding himself with me for a while now; annoyed by being touched by girls he doesn’t even know. Emma is drunk out of her mind, and disappeared along with Jacob about half an hour ago.

To be honest, the party is starting to get out of control, with pretty much everybody drunk, some even using bedrooms. The music is blasting and I wonder when the first noise complaints will come in. Our pool is eagerly used by topless girls and horny guys and I have to restrain myself from jumping in with those hot girls.

It’s Finnley who’s subconsciously preventing me from doing so, constantly asking me not to leave him alone since Janet has been eyeing him for a while now, constantly approaching him with inappropriate comments.

Maybe asking Finnley to come wasn’t such a good idea. He’s obviously out of place, although appearance-wise he looks like he’s been doing this every week. I didn’t even know Finnley could look this good and I’ve known him for years.

‘Round of shots!’ Emma is back in the kitchen I’m currently in with Jaimie, Finnley, Raymond and Jasper. She holds up a bottle of Tequila and much to my surprise it’s Finnley who grabs the bottle and pours in a couple of glasses.

All I do is cock a brow in surprise, watching him closely until our eyes meet.

‘What?’ He continues pouring the liquor into small glasses.

I simply gesture to him, holding a bottle of tequila in one hand, shoving shots in our hands with the other.

‘I think I need something to survive.’ He shrugs while offering me a shot, which I take. Not that I’m the best of friends with Tequila, but if Finnley is drinking this, I’m drinking it.

We hold up our glasses, clink them together and down the burning liquor in one swig, before biting down on lime.

I’m way too drunk to consider it weird for Finnley to drink Tequila like it’s water after that. The fact he never drank alcohol in his life should have gotten me a little worried about this, but I just let him, joining in on his rampage-drinking.

I’m swaying on my feet, watching as Finnley is close with Janet, Emma and Jacob only have eyes for each other and Jaimie is currently my partner in a game of beer-pong, although we are losing badly because we’re both not that good at aiming anymore. Besides, Finnley seems way too close to Janet and I somehow feel like I should protect him. Janet’s the school’s slut and I feel like someone as innocent as Finnley shouldn’t be taken advantage off in a drunk state of mind. It’s my responsibility for him being here in the first place. He would blame me if he did something stupid; and right now, he’s obviously following Janet towards the stairs.

‘Hold up a minute,’ I slur at Jaimie. ‘Be right back.’

‘Dude! No! I need you…’ He tries to stop me from walking away by grabbing my wrist, but it’s not that much effort to pull out of his hold. ‘I can’t drink all of these on my own!’

‘Jasper will take my place.’ I push an already hammered Jasper towards the game, before I quickly make my way through the crowd, avoiding collisions with dancing people, before climbing the stairs as fast as I can. I reached top, just in time to see them go into a bedroom.

I groan in frustration for Janet trying to lure him into this. She always takes advantage of people when drunk.

I barge through the door, tumbling over on my way in, simple too drunk to stay up right. I pay no attention to the fact I’m on the floor; shouting at Finnley. ‘Don’t!’ I scramble up right, locking eyes with Finnley, who’s down on the bed while Janet is straddling his waist. ‘Get off of him.’ I feel enough adrenaline to be sober enough to pull her away. ‘Not going to happen.’

‘Cris!’ Finnley is obviously drunk out of his mind, annoyance is noticeable in his voice, but that’s right before he’s in a fit of laughter. ‘Get out.’

‘No,’ I deadpan. ‘Janet, get lost.’ I push her towards the door.

‘Someone’s jealous Finnley gets a little attention.’

‘It’s Finn,’ I snap, before pushing her out, closing the door behind her.

‘Cris, why did you send her away?’ Finnley is still hiccupping in laughter. ‘You’re a cockblocker.’

‘I just saved your virginity from being taken by an STD-machine.’ I help Finnley upwards, but he’s not cooperating.

‘Why do you always do this?’ He mumbles, closing his eyes. I’m not in the right state to lift some dead weight, so eventually I just let him lay on the bed, flopping down next to him.

‘Do what Finny? Save you from making a mistake?’

‘You never let anyone get close to me.’ The sadness in his voice is evident and it confuses me, since he was laughing a minute ago.

‘You don’t like people close to you.’

‘I like having you close to me.’ He leans on his elbows and turns his head to look at me. ‘And who said I’m a virgin?’

Both his statements are in the least a little surprising, since he’s been keeping his sweet distance for weeks now, and the fact he claims not to be a virgin anymore. I’m too drunk for a serious conversation about both the subjects.

‘You’re drunk,’ I tell him with a grin. ‘You’re just saying stuff.’

‘You’re hammered,’ he snaps back, before sighing deeply. ‘But I’m serious. I like to have you around.’

‘Then why don’t we hang out that much anymore? And don’t go telling me it’s because you’re busy with studying. I could study with you but you won’t let me.’

‘You’re distracting me from the studying.’ Finnley rolls over to his side, watching me closely. I feel his eyes burning holes in the side of my head. ‘That’s why I never ask you to join me for studying.’

‘I distract you? When you tutor me, I’m all serious and shit. I’m never serious, except when I’m with you. I could study quietly.’

‘That’s not what I meant.’ He chuckles. ‘I really like you.’ The last part of his words is barely above a whisper and along with the music blasting through the house, I nearly didn’t catch the words. But I did, and now I wonder what he means by that.

‘How drunk are you?’ Finnley chuckles again, pushing me when I just lay there with my eyes closed. ‘Don’t pass out now.’

I’m trying to keep in the contents of my stomach, but ever since I decided to lay down, the world spins, nauseating me in the process. I sit up straight, hoping the spinning will decrease in an upwards position, scrambling upwards so that if I need to throw up, I’m already on my feet and in to the bathroom sooner. ‘I’m going to be sick.’ I manage to mumble, to which Finnley shoots upwards and towards me, just in time to prevent me from falling over.

‘Bathroom?’ Finnley’s voice sounds amused.

‘As long as I’m standing, I’m fine.’ I tell him while leaning backwards against the wall, closing my eyes again. ‘What are we doing here anyway?’ I look around the bedroom, while Finnley cocks his head to the side, taking me in with a weird, contemplating look on his face.

‘Really Cris?’ Finnley steps closer, preventing me yet again from falling, this time to the side.

‘I’m so drunk…’ I admit, before chuckling.

‘I’m sorry Cris…’ Finnley drawls in a whisper.

‘What for?’

He steps in closer, his hands holding my wrists, pushing them against the wall beside my head. My eyes widen in surprise when his lips lock onto mine, kissing me carefully. It’s a couple of seconds in which neither of us moves, before he pulls back. We stare at each other with wide eyes, his breath tickling my face in the close proximity we are in. He’s still holding my hands, preventing me from doing anything. And for some reason I want him to kiss me again. My drunk mind screams for him to touch me again.

‘I’m sorry…’ He let’s go, stepping backwards with his eyes looking to the ground. ‘I hope you won’t…’ I cut his sentence short, by pushing him backwards on the bed. His eyes widen in shock and his first reaction is to cover his face with his arms. ‘Don’t hit me!’

‘Finn.’ My voice is deep while I crawl on top of him, pulling away his arms to look at him. ‘Why’d you do it?’

‘I was curious?’ He tries, avoiding eye contact. His eyes dart all over my face, probably looking for clues about my thoughts. Instead of saying anything, I lean in and lock our lips back together. I feel his body freeze underneath me. He stops struggling to get out of my hold and I take the opportunity of his shocked state to grab a fist full of hair, pulling his head a little to the right to deepen the kiss. That’s when he answers me, by grabbing hold of my neck, playing with the strains of hair, moaning softly. I lay down on top of him gently, rubbing my hips against his, creating friction and jolts of pleasure. My best friend is hard for me, and it’s turning me on.

‘Cris!?’ It’s Emma’s voice coming from outside of the room. I jolt upwards, stumbling around trying to gain some balance while twirling around just in time to see her barging into the room. ‘Did you see Finn…’ She looks at Finnley, who’s seated on the edge of the bed, looking innocent as fuck. ‘Oh, thank god. I heard you went upstairs with Janet.’

‘Cris came in to save the day.’ Finnley shrugs. ‘I’m way too drunk. I should go home.’ He’s up and out of the room before I can process his words, or the events of the last couple of minutes. Did I just kiss Finnley?