The next day after the huge fight that had Quinn run in tears I decided to bring flowers and chocolates for her. Words can't describe how low I felt watching her cry because of me. I don't think it necessary has to do with Dylan and the rest, it hurt her because she really thought I was using her. And that's not the case, I was in the beginning I have to admit. But I wasn't planning on sleeping with her, it just happened and I wouldn't take it back. It felt nice to have a girl to understand you without any judgment whatsoever. I could be myself around her, she never once got annoyed by me or started anything like Roxy did. She's different. And I knew she would never forgive me after this but I was willing to try.

I had to find her quick, before the principal finds me. I ended up leaving the school looking for her so it didn't give the principal a chance to suspend me. She wasn't at her house; I even waited on her steps for several hours but nothing.

I walked inside the school. I expected a lot of people to be upset with me but everyone acted the same. Some even said there hellos and talked about football tryouts. When I walked over to Quinn's locker, I didn't see her but I did see her brother.

Seeing him made my head hurt. He punched me so many times, my black eye wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. But when I witnessed him take out Quinn's stuff from her locker, I started to panic.

I jogged over there and said my greetings. He didn't even stare back at me. Jackson had a few scratches on his face and one little knot on his forehead. I didn't do that to him. I made sure not to touch him during the fight. "Listen I know you're mad but I swear to you, this is just a whole misunderstanding-

Still not looking at me he responded "misunderstanding? That you made my sister believe that you actually liked her?" He said grabbing her English book from her locker and placing it in the trash bag. "Jackson-okay. If I didn't love her I wouldn't be facing you right now"

He snickered "you're facing me because you feel guilty" then he slammed the locker shut when he was done emptying it "you're a cold hearted bully alright. That's all you are."

I frowned. Alright I deserved that but if you ask me he did a lot worse. I wasn't a bully to Quinn. He was. And the fact that he was her brother made things worse. "I take full responsibility for what I did alright. Why are you emptying out her locker?"

Jackson got close to me. So close that it automatically made me step back. "Why do you think I'm emptying her locker?"

My face fell thinking she decided to move schools. My heart shattered. I gave Jackson the flowers to give Quinn, but he just yanked it from my arms and threw it. He then tried to get ahold of the chocolates but we started playing tug of war with them. When he finally let go I found myself yelling "okay yeah! I fucked up I know that! If you want to beat my ass again you can! I just wanted to apologize and see her that's all!-

He stared laughing "Do you honestly think she really wants to see a weak bully like yourself?"

My heart hurt. But my anger got the best of me "I'm no bully. I may be an asshole sometimes, but the bully is standing right in front of me"

Like I expected he gave me a stunned look. "You were suppose to protect her. But you just joined the school in bullying her. You're no better then Dylan, Zack, Nick or even I. In fact you're way worse."

I was waiting for him to deck me in the face. I refused to show him how I was intimidated. He was a lot bigger then I was. He could have easily been her body guard but he chose not to.

Jackson balled up his fists and whispered "she's not going to see you. Ever-

"Okay then I'll see her. Is she home? I'll come by"

"No she's not!"

I gritted my teeth "fine. Then I'll sit there and wait until someone answers the door, so don't worry" then I turned around.

"You and your friends killed her." He said so low I didn't believe it. I had to ask him to repeat himself and he gladly raised his voice. "She committed suicide Jin, all thanks to you. I hope you burn in Hell with all your friends"

His voice was cracking. And I saw slow tears spill out his eyes. Mines weren't slow, they were uncontrollable. "Jackson, I-are you sure-I didn't mean to kill her, I love her, please Jackson I-

He walked up to me and yanked the chocolates. "Just do my family a favor and stay away from us. Alright? You are dead to all of us" then he walked away with the chocolates. I ran after him wanting more answers. There is no way she died. No, she wouldn't go that far. No, it can't be true.

Suddenly Nick, Zack and Dylan came around the corner laughing; having the time of their lives not even realizing about Quinn's death. Not even feeling guilty about what happened. They just proceeded to make fun of the next fat person that walked past them. I could tell this angered Jackson from the way his shoulders started shaking.

Before anyone could react he slammed the chocolates on the ground and raced to the three boys.

Al three didn't see him coming. He elbowed all three of them to the floor and they all started fighting. My feet wouldn't move. My whole body was shaking and I felt like throwing up.

Quinn

The girl I wanted to marry

Killed herself...

....because of me.

Students started piling around the fight and cheering. Jackson had all three in some kind of head lock using his legs. He was bashing their heads in with his fists. Calling them all killers.

"Hi"

I flinched and spotted the girl in my gym class. I didn't even have time to look at her. I couldn't control how my body was reacting to this horrible news. "I'm Sophia...You okay?" She asked

I didn't say anything. So she took that as a chance to give me a light hug.

"Did you just call me Quinn?" Queen said giving me a look of disgust. It was a mistake. I didn't mean to call her that. She just looks like her. Maybe that explains why I was so hard on her before. But she could never be Quinn.

Quinn is dead.

But every time I look into her eyes, I just see her.

Especially when she did that nervous laugh, like Quinn does. "That's a stupid name, was she like your girlfriend or something?" She joked

I frowned. "It's not a stupid name. And yeah, I dated her in high school" it still hurt even mentioning that.

Queen stop giggling and we just stood there staring into each others eyes. I didn't want to confuse there names again so I said "I'll call you beautiful so we won't have the mix up again. Deal?" I said giving her my pinky. "Beautiful?" She asked

I nodded. "Yeah, you're beautiful" I said trying hard not to see Quinn in her eyes. It felt like I was being haunted right now. I tried so hard for her not to join this camp so I couldn't be haunted by the memories. But I had a feeling she's not going to leave anytime soon.

She smiled "sure you can call me beautiful" then she grabbed my pinky and I kissed both. She watched this action and it truly stunned her, I watched as her lips started to quiver. "You can let go of my pinky now"

She winced away "sorry"

I chuckled forgetting to even ask her why she was crying. I had to get back to make sure Sophia wasn't up. I went over to Dream and gave her one last hug before leaving. I heard her tiny cries crying out for me. Every time I attempted to go back to her, her mother would just shoo me away "she will be fine. She wants a father so bad I believe-

I cut her off with a chuckle "father? Me? No, I could never."

"What? What if Sophia wanted kids?"

I smiled "then I wouldn't be with her. We both agreed Kids aren't on our bucket list. I don't think I ever want to be a father."

She frowned and gave me the most unreadable facial expression. She then quickly walked passed me with her daughter without even saying goodnight.

Dream started waving goodbye "bye bye"

I waved back

She continued on saying goodbye until they were out of sight.

I walked inside my little house only to witness Roxy trying to get Cindy's attention. But my best friend was drowning her voice with putting up the volume of the television. When I arrived they all turned to me. Roxy wobbled to me and started fiddling with her finger "Quinn...is it really you?"

I bit my lip from rolling my eyes. She took my silence and went in for a hug but I walked around her. "Quinn..."

I turned to face her "please, I need to put my daughter to bed. Can you just leave us alone"

I hated seeing her face fall. Her eyes got big indicating how hard she tried to control her emotions. I didn't mean to take my anger out on her but I didn't want to hear her apology. Not now. And not tomorrow.

When I'm ready

For now, she's just a ghost I refuse to acknowledge.

"What happened?" Cindy said standing up.

I couldn't even control my voice "he doesn't want to be a father"

~~

I didn't sleep well. How could I? I knew this was a bad idea. I just fucking knew. Dream would never have her father. He doesn't even want kids. I don't understand why he would have sex if he didn't want them.

Cindy said if I were to leave this camp then she would follow. A part of me was telling myself to stay a little longer. Fight a little harder.

~~~

When morning hit, I left Dream sleeping on the bed. She usually gets up around 9am. It was only 4am and Sophia was waking everyone up with her loud ass voice. I tucked my little girl and followed Cindy and Roxy out. We went to the showers and brushed our teeth. She told us we didn't have to take showers, but she didn't tell us why.

Across from us, the men were all jogging. Jin was the leader.

I rolled my eyes.

I searched for Matt in the group. Didn't find him.

I didn't even see Jackson.

"Maybe date his brother" Cindy said killing my thoughts. We both decided to wear tight leggings and a tank top for today's training. Roxy had on baggy clothes; sweats and a sweatshirt. All the other females stared at this with great disgust. Some even whispered why she even attended boot camp because of her uncontrollable weight.

"You mean Matt?"

Cindy nodded "yeah, Jin is a piece of shit. His brother is way more compatible with you." She added. I couldn't help but consider the fact she hasn't mentioned what happened with Jackson or what he admitted yesterday.

I looked at the group of boys and finally spotted my brother. He and Jin were neck and neck running, while the group tried to catch up with him.

"Ladies pay attention!" Sophia screeched killing my thoughts. We were walking for some time I didn't even realize where we were. We were at the same place Jin took me last night. The waterfall. It looked more beautiful at night then in the daytime. The water wasn't as aggressive at night. Sophia walked over to us with her combat boots and pointed her fingers at us. "Take off your clothes"

"What?" Cindy and I blurted out

"You heard me. I'm going to use you guys as an example for this procedure." Then she eyed Roxy. "You will be the victim and Queen will be saving you. Understand?"

What? I can't even swim.

"How about you be the victim and no one saves you" Cindy hissed. Sophia got in her face and yelled in her face. "Push ups! NOW!"

"What?"

"NOW!" She screeched grabbing onto her hair and pulled her down with one hard pull. Cindy's face was all smothered on the sand and I leaped to help but Sophia warned me not. "You got five seconds to take off your clothes or I'll punish everyone"

The girls literally were begging Roxy and I to take off our clothes and just get in the water.

I was deadly afraid of the water. I couldn't even float. So I don't know how I could save Roxy. But I stripped until I was facing everyone with only my bra and panties. Some girls started praising my body and giving me compliments. I knew it angered Sophia. As for Roxy, she just looked really...bad. All I saw was stretch marks; really deep ones. She did in fact change. She had a tiny head, a really huge body and tiny legs. It didn't fit her. You could already hear the low snickers and whispers.

"Get in the water Roxy" Sophia said pushing her towards the waterfall. She hesitated but did what she was told. She went a little too far. You could only see her head poking out the water. I can tell she wanted to hide her body

Cindy was still doing her push ups; cursing death on Sophia.

I don't even think she knew I couldn't swim.

Sophia started pushing me towards the water. "Get in soldier! That's an order!"

I started shaking in fear. The water looked like it could swallow me within seconds. I couldn't help but whimper.

"Queen you got three seconds to get in, or I will humiliate you in front of all these soldiers"

"How about you shut up!" I found myself screaming. Sophia responded by grabbing me and pulling me closer to the water. My eyes widened and I shoved her off; she tripped over her feet and I knew anger took control of her. With one hard push, she pushed me in the water. I desperately tried to get back to land but she pushed me further. My feet started to float and I started screaming.

"Stop being a pussy! Go save Roxy!" She ordered.

I looked over at my roommate. My eyes almost popped out it's socket when she started flapping her hands. "There is something in the water" she gasped. She tried to swim towards me but soon fell under. I looked back at Sophia and screamed for her to help but no one else saw what I saw.

I was now under the water; screaming for dear life because I couldn't get back up. I spotted Roxy a few inches away from me; covering her face. Her panties was caught on something. My vision started to get blurry and water filled my lungs.

Suddenly an arm pulled me up. I clung to whoever just rescued me. Only to see Jin looking back at me. He gave me an annoyed look "really? 5ft of water and you couldn't just stand up?"

I heard some of the girls giggling. But Sophia laughed the loudest. "You didn't save Roxy. So I will be expecting a mile run from you." She yelled.

Mortified that I embarrassed myself again, I looked over at Roxy and found her literally walking back to us. Only this time her panties had a huge hole on the side.

The girls were dying because of this. And I begged Jin to take me back to land. He shook his head "no you will walk. You will be a solider soon so-

I slapped him as hard as I could "TAKE ME BACK TO LAND!"

The impact of my hit had his head spin back. I didn't care if he was angry. I was afraid of water. I was afraid to die. And here he was making a mockery out of me.

He surprisingly held me and placed me back on the sand. Cindy rushed to me and asked if I was ok. I was still shaking. Sophia had an evil grin on her face and I just wanted to punch it off. I just had it with this stupid camp. I found myself shoving my best friend out the way.

I needed to get Dream and get the hell out.

"Don't tell me you're giving up soldier" Jin said following me.

"Listen I don't care! Just stop following me" I ordered pulling my wet panties back up. I already felt them slipping.

I knew he saw my whole ass crack. But I didn't care.

I felt him yank my arm and pull it close to him "Do you know how many people sacrifice their lives for this country? And you're just going to quit?"

I nodded "yep!"

He gave me a blank facial expression. Then finally let me go. "Then go. We don't need weak people like you here. Especially people that give up. It's pathetic"