《Gratuitous Item Crafting and Descriptions (and shoddy economics)》The Fork of Esurient Cooking

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"Huh, it feels like time has passed, but it hasn't really. Weird" Jimmy mused to himself, briefly distracted from his crafting. He grabbed a broom and swept the floors, thinking about life and what he wanted to make and do. There were a great many options, but he settled upon making a fork, as he was getting a little hungry and could smell sausages cooking.

"Dad doesn't have very nice cutlery, and he always grabs the only decent utensils, so I guess I gotta make my own one! it's gonna be special."

Grabbing a copper ingot and some tin, he heated up the forge to a comfortable degree, and began to cut a smaller piece off, as he didn't need a giant fork, just a normal sized one. Careful use of chisel, hammer and tongs quickly pried the needed metals from the bigger ingot, and with a content smile Jimmy got to hammering and tapping and folding. Three forks quite narrow and evenly spaced, and held carefully parallel to each other.

The handle was exceptionally smooth and tapered like a grass leaf, smaller at the neck, and the tines were slightly adjusted to be completely safe to lick. With a very skillful addition of the tin to the points and exceptional concentration, an alloy was made; a different colour than the two metals that couldn't be explained for they were different to the expected alloy.

Allowing the mostly completed fork to cool, Jimmy shoved it all into the blaze again, until it was red hot. Struck by inspiration and the knowledge that his dad might pretend to have always had this special fork, he grabbed his finest chisel and engraved his name in cursive, a feat he'd never been taught.

With a few minor adjustments and the addition of a slight indentation to each of the tines to make them grip the food better whilst not being coarse to the touch, he plunged it into the ice-cold dousing barrel, nodded and grinned as the Fork took on a sheen.

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"DINNER'S READY" his 'dad' hollered.

"Awesome! just finished my fork!"

Jimmy adjusted his grip and was struck by a deep hunger at the delicious scent and morsels, and raced inside. He stuffed himself full of multiple courses until his 'dad' informed him there was no more. With a cry of horror at the absense of more food, Jimmy decided to take matters into his own hands and started fixing himself another meal.

Bacon, veges and somehow rice and lentils was quickly all cooking, boiling and frying based on their perfect requirements. Jimmy was banging on the sink demanding the food to hurry up.

At last it was all ready and he devoured it all. He was like an over-ripe water-melon. He passed out still hungry, and his 'dad' removed the Fork of Esurient Cooking, and quickly raced off to hide it before another disaster occurred.

The FEC to this day remains hidden in the bottomest drawers. It is carefully placed inside a lock-box of Jimmy's own future design that has successfully kept the world safe from such a cursed object. Such was the worry by both Jimmy - after he'd been explained what had happened - and his 'dad' that it was beyond whatever whimsical object Jimmy could and had made, regardless of the actual severity.

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