《bound together | todoroki x reader [ soulmate! au ] [female pronouns]》18: "It's Okay."
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"Our universe grants every soul a twin -- a reflection of themselves -- the kindred spirit -- And no matter where they are or how far away they are from each other -- even if they are in different dimensions, they will always find one another. This is destiny; this is love."
- Julie Dillon
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
When you two arrived in the infirmary, Recovery Girl made sure to give you guys beds to rest on. There had been barely anyone in that day, so there was no one else in the room. She claimed that she was going to a staff meeting and told you both to behave before leaving and shutting the door.
You and Todoroki's bed had been rolled closer to each other so it wouldn't cause any strain on your wrists while you both laid down. You were silent for the first five minutes or so, just listening to the air conditioning that came from the ceiling. After that, you had decided to roll over to look at Todoroki, deciding that you needed to have a long-overdue conversation.
Once you flipped over to look at him, you were surprised to find him looking at you already. It looked like he had been staring for a while, but he didn't back down. Your mouth opened and closed as you tried to find the right words to initiate the conversation. Thankfully, Todoroki spoke up first. "Is there something you wanted to talk about?"
You knew he was already one step ahead of you. You were too tired to sit up, so you laid your arm out and rested your head on it, the chains of the handcuffs jingling at the movement. "Uhm, yeah. I think we need to talk about everything. Without arguing this time."
He nodded his head, sitting up a little bit further before saying, "Yeah, I think that's ideal."
You didn't know what came over you, but you just jumped straight to apologising. "I'm so sorry for everything I've caused. Aizawa-sensei was right. The only one causing problems here is me. I'm sorry I didn't try to understand your end of the issue. All I was focusing on was my own feelings, and the only thing I did to consider yours was assume, not ask. It's caused so many arguments and problems between us, so I really am sorry."
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Todoroki shuffled himself closer to the side of his bed, swinging his legs so they were now hanging over the edge of it. He propped himself up with his hands before saying, "I understand. But just understand that I don't think you should completely blame yourself. I've heard a couple of times that you've been insecure about your mark, so if you're comfortable with it, I'd like to hear about it."
You hesitated before deciding that it was the best thing. You both needed to get your feelings out in the open – especially you.
"I, uh, ever since I learnt what the words on my arm meant, it never seemed like a positive thing to me. It did cause me to have a lot of insecurities growing up, and I always had issues not just with the way I looked, but with my personality. I never liked who I was as a whole due to that mark.
"I guess when you had spoken those words to me as your first words during Miss Midnight's activity, it hurt a lot and brought up a lot of still current insecurities. To me, hearing those words just proved that I was right; that my soulmate didn't in fact want to be stuck with me. It didn't matter how much Midoriya or Uraraka or Iida or anyone would tell me that wasn't the case, I wouldn't believe them.
"That obviously carried on to every time we hung out. I would overthink everything and always assumed you didn't like me, or would rather have someone else as your soulmate. It isn't your fault. My brain just absolutely hates me."
Todoroki stayed silent, looking down at you as you picked at the pillow case. Sighing, he got up from his bed, making his way over to yours. Sitting down on the edge of it, he gazed down at you, you now looking back up at him. "I have something to admit."
Unsurprisingly, you assumed the worst, and you mentally cringed, waiting for your rejection. But it never came. "I do want to be your soulmate. Very much."
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You almost choked on your saliva, and you looked at him with a look filled with astonishment. "You what?"
He smiled gently at your reaction before saying again, "I have absolutely no issue with you being my soulmate."
Suddenly the words on your arm weren't burning. They were warm. They were tingling. It wasn't a constant a reminder of hate. It was a constant reminder of warmth and, dare you say it, love.
You nodded your head awkwardly, trying to remain as chill as possible, "Cool, coolcoolcoolcoolcoolcool, cool. So what did you mean by these words then?"
You showed him your forearm, and his cheeks went red as he stared at the shimmery gold lettering. "Uhm, we-well, I would have elaborated if we hadn't received our groundbreaking news afterward."
You waited as patiently as possible, realising he needed some time to get his words out. He was now picking at some loose threading on the blanket, and he just barely managed to say in a loud-enough voice, "I-I meant that I didn't think someone as beaut-beautiful as you could be my, uh. . . Be my soulmate. . ."
You felt your heart soar and clench at the same time. On one hand, you were super glad your soulmate didn't hate you, and even found you pretty. On the other hand, however, you felt extremely guilty.
You felt tears brim your eyes as your throat tightened up, and Todoroki noticed. He frowned, dipping his head down so you would look at him. "What's wrong?"
You sniffed, wiping your eyes obsessively as you tried to get rid of the tears. "It-It's just. . ." You sat up, completely ignoring the pain in your legs as your crossed them. "This could have gone so differently if I hadn't brought in my own personal problems and insecurities into it. I ruined so many things between us, and for what? For nothing. We went through so many arguments and pain for no goddamn reason, and I–"
"(L/N)-san, listen to me," Todoroki said, gripping onto your hands to stop you from wiping your face, moving to sit cross-legged opposite you. "Even if you did ruin things, which you didn't, it's been resolved now. If we didn't have these issues, we probably wouldn't know these things. I probably would have gone all this time not knowing about your suffering, maybe even longer. And that's not something I want."
You sniffed unattractively, nodding as you looked down at your lap. You felt his gaze on you, and he whispered softly, "Look at me."
You shook your head, feeling your lip quiver. He gently gripped onto your chin with two fingers, slowly bringing your head up to look at him. You almost felt yourself break again when he said his next words, them having a completely different meaning to you know:
"I'm going to look after you. It's my job as your soulmate. I'm doing this not because I have to, but because I want to."
You burst into tears again, finally shattering. He brought you into his arms, burying his face into your hair and rubbing your back soothingly. You released all your inner turmoil onto his white shirt, apologising once you had calmed down and taken a look at it. He chuckled while smiling at you softly.
"It's okay. I'm your soulmate, I'm supposed to be here for you."
You smiled up at him, wiping away your tears before leaning your head against his chest, hugging him back. You felt his arms wrap tighter around you, and you felt warmth and comfort from it.
When Recovery Girl came in half an hour later, you had both fallen asleep next to each other, Todoroki holding you, his head on top of yours as yours rested against his chest.
She smiled at the sight before mumbling to herself, "Aizawa's gonna be glad."
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