《Nandemonogatari: A New Story of Something Else》Chapter 28: Irregular Maintenance

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The air was heavy. The Science Club dorm had transformed into something of a makeshift hospital waiting room. For whatever reason, the nurse saw fit to transfer Suzaka into their care. Levity had been sucked out of the Paranormal Club members, and any animosities had reached a temporary truce. For what seemed like hours, no one dared say a word. Eyes were cast at the ground. Eventually, Miku wanders out of the room from where Suzaka had been carted unconsciously into.

Yuuri looks around, hesitant, but then stands up. “How is she?”

Miku looks a bit confused at first, but then smiles as she waves her hand, “No need to worry! Miss Yuuma will be totally fine! Tsukasa is merely finishing her observations to determine if her hypotheses are correct! They normally are!”

Rina shudders, “‘Hy...poth...theses’? Why did that sound super creepy? Like you’re experimenting on her or something...”

“Normally hypotheses lead to experiments.” Hotaru corrects her.

Katsuki’s eyes light up, “Is Tsukasa one of those mad scientists?”

“No!” comes a voice from the other room, followed by Tsukasa marching out, a rather conspicuous ‘#2’ emblazoned across a headband she had put on. “We are not a mad scientist, and your friend is in good hands!”

Katsuki tilts her head, “We?”

Before she can answer, another Tsukasa, this one labeled ‘#6’,walks out and taps the first Tsukasa’s shoulder. Two-kasa returns to the dark room.

“Yes! I, or we, are Tsukasa,” the sixth one states matter of factly, “But I am here to answer your questions.”

“How about answering what’s going on with Suzaka?!” Rina demands.

Tsuka-Six tilts her head, “You could at least ask me politely.” She shakes her head quickly, “No matter. Suzaka is a rather special girl, you know?””

Rina groans, “We’re all special!”

Yuudai slowly raises his hand. “Well...”

Mari grabs his arm and lowers it, shaking her head.

Miku smiles, “It’s not all natural, silly!”

“Then what is it then?” Rina snaps, “Is she some sort of robot or something?”

Miku laughs, “She can’t be a robot!”

Tsuka-Six sighs, “Miku’s right, she’s not a robot but she’s not entirely human either.”

Kirika raises her hand, “Is she perhaps a beast?”

“No. Your friend was almost right. She’s cybernetically enhanced.”

Kirika raises her hand a second time, “Being cybernetically enhanced is not the same as not being entirely human. To say as much is to claim, for instance, that a person who requires a prosthetic leg, or a pacemaker, has lost some of their ‘humanity’. While you might argue tha-”

“A cyborg, then.” Akina cuts in.

Tsuka-Six, ignoring the elf, gives a double thumbs up, “Correct!”

“A cyborg? Is that why Miss Okitsu gave her over to you?” Yuuri asks, half in confusion and half out of a desire for an explanation.

“Yep! To put it simply, she has a rare wasting disease, as confirmed by Miss Okitsu. As I suspected, she has some enhancements in her body, fitted to counter the damage the disease does to her.” Tsuka-Six answers.

Yuudai scratches his head, “As suspected? How’d you suspect she was all cybernautical? We didn’t know anything and we live with her!”

Tsuka-Six motions to Miku who runs down a hallway, returning a few seconds later with a dry erase board containing a doodle of Suzaka.

“Well, when you visited a few weeks ago, I took notice of the absurd amount of metal in Suzaka’s body.”

“How’d ya do that when yew were undah tha table?” Mari asks.

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Tsuka-Six spreads her arms wide, “This entire dorm is one big research lab! We have sensors everywhere! That explains it enough?

There’s a brief pause, some of the crew look nervously around the room, suddenly self-conscious.

“Good! After you left, I had Miku get more scans of Suzaka during the trial.”

“I don’t remembah seein’ her takin’ no pichas or anythang.” Mari says.

“You didn’t see the scanners in this room, either!” Tsuka-Six says. She takes a deep breath, “If there are no further interruptions, keeping this as simple as possible, her limbs are all robotic. Probably because she lost the ability to use her actual limbs. Once Miss Okitsu explained her disease to me, the metal in her body all made sense.”

“Then why did she stutter and collapse earlier?” Rina asks, “Did I short circuit her or something?”

Before Tsuka-Six can answer, Three-kasa comes out and seamlessly takes her place, “Yes and no.” She points to the midsection on the Suzaka doodle, “Suzaka’s cybernetics are connected to a… let’s call it a ‘command center’ where her stomach would be. It serves three purposes; the first is to work with her brain to properly relay commands to the limbs and overclock them if needed, secondly to convert any food she eats into energy to distribute through her body like how, you know, a stomach does, and finally to prevent the spread of her disease into her lungs, heart, and brain.”

Rina scratches her head, “So I overloaded that system?”

Two-kasa joins Three-kasa.

“Yes.” says Two-kasa.

“No.” Three-kasa says at the same time.

The two ‘kasas share a look before Two-kasa continues, “You did overload her system, but only because her limbs haven’t undergone any maintenance in, what looks like, over a year. I would estimate that they were only operating at about 50% of maximum capacity. Her fight with Eriri and whatever it was that you did to her were merely the straws that broke the robo-camel’s cybernetically enhanced spine, so to speak.”

“Uh, can you fix her?” Yuudai asks.

Akina snorts, “Might as well take her to a professional at this point.”

Two-kasa and Three-kasa scoff in unison, “What, a doctor? Good luck finding a doctor who knows how to work on robot legs! If a doctor could fix this, you’d still be at the nurse’s office!” Two-kasa begins.

“Or a mechanic, perhaps?” Three-kasa continues, “She’s not a car!”

“We’re repairing her limbs now, that’s easy stuff!” Two-kasa follows on.

“But, we would also like to increase the output of her command center.” says Three-kasa, “It appears that it was designed to support add-ons, so it would be a waste to just fix her up and ship her out. There’s something I’d like to try. It would need a little more juice, but you can’t make an omelette without propane.”

Rina jumps up excitedly, “You mean she’ll get a midseason upgrade!?”

Both Tsukasas looked confused.

“Sure! If that’s what makes sense to you, sure!” Three-kasa says.

The door to the dark room opens and out comes Tsukasa Prime, wearing a ‘#1’ headband, wheeling Suzaka out on a table, “She’s ready!”

The Paranormal Club gathers around the table.

Tsukasa Prime removes her headband and suddenly all clones vanish.

“The new and improved Suzaka should be waking up...NOW!” Tsukasa claps her hands.

Suzaka groans and sits up, “Ah….W-Where?”

“Go ahead and move for me!” Tsukasa says.

Suzaka nods, sliding off the table without a second thought.

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“Funny lookin’ hospital...” Suzaka murmurs.

“It’s the...” Yuuri hesitates, figuring out the best way to break the news, “It’s the Science Club dorm.”

Suzaka becomes fully alert, “E-Eh!?”

Miku spins Suzaka around to Tsukasa.

“We can explain that later! Tell me how you feel right now!” The redhead demands.

Suzaka stutters a bit, “Er... bit groggy, but I’m movin’ around just fine, I guess.”

Tsukasa takes notes, “Good! Now I did take a look at how your cybernetics tick and it appears you should be able to handle a few augmentations. I’m still working on a big one that I’d like to test with you, but I did make one modification, just to test the energy consumption.”

Suzaka tilts her head, “Augmen- You mean like this thing?” She grabs her left forearm and twists it off, revealing a baton that starts to crackle with electricity.

Rina stares in wonder, “Cool...”

Tsukasa scribbles faster, “Quite! Now we can test two augments on your power supply! Lift your left leg please!”

Suzaka does as instructed, a look of confusion on her face. The bottom of her shoe has a hole cut out in the heel.

“Was that always there?” Yuudai asks.

“Eh?” Suzaka takes her shoe off to inspect, “Hey! Wha’dya do!?”

Tsukasa sighs, “We’re getting there. Now lift up your leg and squeeze your thigh.”

Suzaka follows the instructions again. A jet of air fires out her heel, causing the Paranormal Club to jump.

“Mweh!?” Mari reacts.

“I added a BB gun and a small air compression chamber to your leg.” Tsukasa explains, “I didn’t load it obviously, but I’ll give you the ammunition once you leave. You should be able to find where to load it no problem.”

Suzaka’s eyes sparkle, “So cool... Thanks Tsukasa!”

The small scientist smiles in return, “I should thank you! It’s exciting to have an actual cyborg here to test things like this on! Oh yeah! If you want any of your augmentations swapped out, come visit me!”

“Of course! I wanna try out different things!”

“Wait, why not test on Miku?” Rina asks.

Miku blinks, “I am not a cyborg like Miss Yuuma!”

“You are a robot though.” Akina says, walking up.

Tsukasa deadpans, “I went over this with your clubmates before. Miku is not a robot, she’s just a bit strange. Like most scientists.”

Akina ignores Tsukasa’s protests, “Miku, this statement is false.”

Miku blinks for a second before she leans over slightly, arms falling limp at her sides.

“Ugh! You idiot! I hadn’t even begun to test out the Self Awareness Denial System! Who knows what that could do to her sense of self?! Six years of work getting her close to human and you could ruin it all! Have you never read a Sci-Fi novel?”

Tsukasa continues complaining to herself as she slaps Miku on the back. “Alright, nap time is over.”

Miku stands back up, “Good morning Tsukasa!”

“It’s past 6pm Miku.” Tsukasa responds.

“Adjusting!” Miku salutes.

Tsukasa turns back to the group, covering one side of her mouth as she whispers, “Her AI evolves based on observing her surroundings and watching how people act. So please, nothing vulgar!”

“I think it’s the least we can do.” Yuuri says, as Miku tilts her head.

“In that case, you’re all free to go.” Tsukasa waves, “I’ve got Suzaka’s number, so I’ll let her know when the upgrades are finished.”

***

Cerys nods as Yuuri and Suzaka recaps the afternoon’s events to her. The club lazes about in the main room, as their worries dissipate about Suzaka’s condition.

Cerys leans back, “Surprised daddy’s little girl stayed in the lab. She’s gotten really advanced.”

“Wait, yew know ‘er?” Mari asks.

Cerys nods, “Well, her dad and my dad worked in the same cybernetics lab. I remember seeing her running around all the time. Guess she really took to it.”

Yuuri is shocked, “Wow, you’ve never mentioned this before.”

“I don’t have to tell you guys everything.” Cerys motions to Suzaka, “Put your arm on the table.”

Suzaka grabs her arm and begins to twist it off. Cerys slaps her hand away, “Like a normal person!”

The cyborg shrugs and sets her arm on the table.

Cerys hovers over it, getting close to inspect it, “Seamless design.” She pokes it, “Lifelike and cool to the touch, hidden joints, silent actuators. Whoever made this had access to some super premium stuff. Like the shit my father would experiment with.” Cerys stares down Suzaka, “Who did this? There’s no logo.”

Suzaka tilts her head, “Logos? I’m not sponsored ‘r anything.”

Cerys pulls the sleeve on her arm up, revealing a rather intricate logo, “All cybernetics are branded, yet yours aren’t. Do you not know anything about who made it!?”

Yuuri and Mari stare in shock at Cerys.

“Wait, why are you guys looking at me like that?” the redhead asks. She looks at her arm, “Oh this? It’s fake.” She pulls her arm off and sets it on the table.”

“Hey! Ya’ just said I couldn’t do that!” Suzaka protests.

Both third years recoil in fear.

“Has...it always been like that?” Yuuri finally says.

Cerys reattaches her arm, “Yes! Why do you think I wear this sleeve!? You know, I thought we were close enough friends for you to notice this! You guys are weird.”

Mari stands up and pulls Yuuri up with her, “We’re done here.”

Suzaka puts an arm around Cerys as the third years leave, “Don’t worry Cerys, we can be cyborg buddies now!”

Cerys’ face contorts in disgust. She ducks from under her arm and walks away, “I’m going to bed.”

***

Suzaka slides open the door in front of her, doubts racing through her mind,.

“Excuse me, Susumu Yuuma, second year student, here for Ms. Parker.”

“Please, come in.” A voice from inside the office answers.

Suzaka steps in quietly; classes are over for the day and many of the teachers have already taken their leave. A few teachers, mainly department heads, are still buzzing around, and there are a couple of students who are also there to discuss various matters with their students. One of those teachers still remaining, a foreign woman with deep brown hair flowing past her shoulders, is tidying up some papers as Suzaka approaches..

“Ah! Ms. Yuuma! Please take a seat.” She says with a gentle smile, gesturing to a vacant chair opposite her desk.

Suzaka nods, “Sorry for springin’ this on ya so late, Ms. Parker.”

Ms. Parker waves her off, “I am your club supervisor, silly. There’s no need to be so nervous about any problems you’re having! How can I help?”

Suzaka fidgets in place, “Well…I need some advice from…someone who knows things and you were the first person I thought of!”

“Are you struggling with math? You don’t need to be shy, you wouldn’t be the first! There is a tutoring program here at the school. We actually have sessions today, if you’d like to join.”

“I-It’s not math!” Suzaka looks at the floor, “It’s more…personal.”

Ms. Parker tightens her grip on her bag straps. She collects herself and smiles at Suzaka, “Are you… Sure that I’m the right teacher to be asking this?”

Suzaka nods furiously, then vomits out her fears of having robot parts in a breathless run-on sentence.

Her loud and sudden outburst draws some glances from some teachers around the office, but they pay it no heed. Ms. Parker blinks, “Could you repeat that a bit slower this time?”

Suzaka takes a deep breath, “I’m scared all my friends will think I’m weird because I have robot parts…”

Ms. Parker’s face has gone blank from processing the information.

“I know you don’t got robot parts but you were the only person I could think of to go to!” the young girl frets “I don’t want them to look at me like I’m some dyin’ kid like my old friends did!” She begins to pace around as she speaks. “These parts make me normal as everyone else now! I just want people to stop worryin’ over me and treat me like I’m fine!” She stomps her foot to emphasize her point, drawing more glances from across the office. She stares at her supervisor, anger, shame and sadness in her eyes.

Ms. Parker’s eyes dart nervously at the onlookers. She takes a deep breath and holds her hands up to try and calm her student, “Ms. Yuuma, let us take a moment to calm down and go through this together. First…You have ‘robot parts’?”

Suzaka’s head drops. “Now you think I’m useless ‘n dyin’ too…” Suzaka grumbles in frustration

“Not at all!” Ms. Parker says, her voice jumping half an octave. “The fact that you had to tell me you had these ‘robot parts’ just means that they’re well hidden. And you seem as healthy as can be, so I wouldn’t be quick to assume like that… Medical science is so advanced these days after all.”

“That’s not the important part!” she responds. “How do I handle my friends bein’ all afraid that I might not be around at any moment?”

Ms. Parker’s face lights up, “Maybe I might be able to actually help you with this.”

“R-Really!?” Suzaka thinks about it, “Didjya think ya were outta place, too?”

Ms. Parker raises an eyebrow, then laughs it off, “Well, I am just a regular human teacher in a school full of superpowered students. There are things I see you guys do that I would never even attempt to try!”

“Because you’re not as strong as us!”

Ms. Parker frets, “W-Well yes, but that’s not my point! Some of my students can fly, some can cut things with their hands, but we’re all still human and we all still have the same type of issues.” Ms. Parker puts her hands on Suzaka’s sunken shoulders, “The way you feel right now is the way I feel watching you guys compete...” Parker trails off, realizing she has gotten far from the point as Suzuka watches her with rapt attention. She panics and retracts her hand, “Y-You’re friends are your friends. They’ve been with you this far so why would they change now?”

Suzaka is caught off guard by the topic change, “H-Huh?”

“For example, take Ms. Warren. She seems to be the one to speak her mind. Has she treated you differently?”

Suzaka thinks about it, “Well…no…She kinda thinks I’m cool but Yuuri does worry!”

“She’s the club president. It’s her job to worry about you guys. You are the biggest club on campus, so it might be overwhelming for her at times.”

“Oh…” Suzaka thinks it over.

Ms. Parker is quick to follow up, “She’s worried about you as a friend, you know. It’s only natural to get a bit concerned for any matter involving health.”

“But then they’re worried ‘bout me dyin’ again!” Suzaka cries, slumping out of her chair and to the floor.

“W-Well, outside of Yuuri, have you noticed them worrying about you dying?”

Suzaka shakes her head.

“Then they’re not worried! You’re more worried about them being worried about you than they actually are.”

Suzaka looks up and frowns, “That don’t make no sense…”

“Think about how they’ve acted around you this week. If you think they’re treating you differently, then talk to them about it!”

“But that’s hard.” Suzaka whines.

“No one said it would be easy Ms. Yuuma,” Ms. Parker says. “You worked up the courage to come talk to me, so talking to them will be just like this.”

“I don’t want them to think I’m weak though!” Suzaka yells.

Ms. Parker sighs, “I want you to think about what you said because it sounds silly.”

Suzaka pouts, “Now you’re makin’ fun of me!”

“It takes a lot of strength to do what you’ve done today, Ms. Yuuma,” Ms. Parker says, shaking her head, “Give what I said a try and things will turn out just fine, trust me.”

Suzaka sniffles, “Y’mean it?”

“Of course! Now go back to your clubroom, I still need to prepare for tonight's tutoring session.”

Suzaka nods and stands up, “I’ll try it. Thanks Ms. Parker! I knew I could count on you!”

Ms. Parker watches Suzaka jog out of the office, trying not to cringe inwardly. Once she’s sure Suzaka’s out of earshot, she sighs and looks at the ground.

“Well, that could have gone better.”

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