Peyton forced herself to talk to the Dexters' when they got home because she knew that she was a bitch to them the night before and she felt that she had to make it up to them. What she did not force herself to do though was eat. She just could not. She apologised for it and tried not to feel too guilty for wasting the food.

She made a quick excuse that she was tired and had to prepare herself for her session with the psychiatrist in the morning so she would go to bed early. Everyone seemed to buy her story. That, or they realised that she just wanted to be alone and so let her. Either way, she was grateful to them for their understanding.

Just as she was mounting the stairs, Mrs Dexter called her back.

"Yes?" She questioned from the doorway to the dining room.

"There was a bottle of cough syrup in the medicine cabinet and it's not there anymore. Do you know anything about that?"

"Oh, yeah, sorry, I forgot to mention, I thought I was coming down with something so I went to take some but it slipped out of my hand and spilled in the sink."

"That's okay sweetie. We were just wondering."

"Okay. G'night." Lying is way too easy for me.

As she lay in bed trying not to think about certain things and a certain person in particular, her phone rang. She groaned as she began to reach across to her night stand to get it. Who the fuck is calling me? The only person who ever calls me in right here. Must be a wrong number then.

She satisfied herself with the thought that it was a wrong number and pulled her hand back waiting for the phone to stop ringing. It did but a minute later it began to ring again. What the fuck! You have the wrong number! Stop calling.

Eventually it stopped ringing only to begin again a minute after.

In frustration she reached across and answered, "stop calling! You have the wrong number!"

The person answered calmly, "no I don't."

"Casey?"

"Hi Peyton."

"Hey... sorry about that I thought it was a wrong number..."

Casey chuckled, "I realise. I told Kimberly I'd call you tonight."

"She told me. Sorry, but I did not believe you."

"That's okay. People lie a lot. Anyhow, how are you feeling?"

"Fine."

"Really? You don't sound fine to me."

Peyton gave no response.

"I missed you at school today."

"I can't understand why."

"You're my friend. I like hanging out with you."

"You've only known me for three days."

"Yeah, but that doesn't stop me from liking you and missing you."

"Okay."

There was a long moment of silence. Peyton had no idea what to say in addition to the fact that she had no desire to say anything. She just wanted to lie down and wallow in her self pity.

Casey spoke up then and asked what she really wanted to ask, "you're in love with her aren't you?"

"What? Who?"

"Sadie. You're in love with Sadie aren't you?"

Peyton was genuinely shocked by Casey's direct question. "What? No. How did you even come up with that absurd thought?"

"You are. Don't try to lie about it. You are in love with her."

"Well if you're so convinced of this fact why did you ask me?"

"I just want you to confirm my suspicions. So, are you?"

"Am I what?"

"Peyton! Stop being such a difficult baby!"

Peyton sighed. Casey was right. She was being an idiot about this. "Sorry. Yes. And I hate myself for it. I am such an idiot. I had to choose the straightest, most homophobic girl to fall for."

"I'm sorry Peyton. That must be very hard for you to come to terms with."

"Yeah..." Peyton thought for a moment on whether or not she should tell Casey what she was thinking since the incident ensued the day before. She decided it was the right thing to tell Casey. "Um... Casey?"

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry."

"For what? You didn't do anything wrong." Casey was honestly confused by Peyton's apology.

"Actually, yes I did. I highly suspected that Sadie is a homophobe and I pushed her and made a big scene of the whole thing and I know how much it hurts you. I know how hard it is when people who are close to you and who's opinion you value hate who you are. I know you've been working yourself up to tell Sadie and I know your heart is crushed. So, for that I am sorry. Truly, I am."

There was a pause and Peyton was positive she heard a sniffle or two before Casey spoke, "you have no need to apologise. It's not your fault that Sadie is the way she is. And yes, it hurts like a fucking bitch! I honestly cannot believe how much it hurts. I swear I could not even look at her today. And what hurts even more is trying to pretend that nothing is wrong. I really don't want anyone suspecting anything. Especially now." Casey sniffled a couple more time before she continued, "I wanted to thank you though."

Peyton interrupted, "thank me? For what?!"

"Because of you I got to find out what Sadie's reaction would be if I told her that I'm a lesbian. So, now I know without having to tell her and she's still my best friend... for whatever that's worth..."

Peyton felt her heart ache for Casey. "Casey... I... well I guess it is better this way for you. But you never know, you are her best friend. She doesn't know me. Maybe she would be willing to accept you because she loves you."

"You really think so?" Casey had a small shred of hope in her voice.

Peyton sighed, "no. I'm sorry. Honestly, I don't think she will accept you. Not with the way she behaved yesterday. I'm really sorry Casey."

After a few sniffles Casey replied, "it's okay. I have two choices, I could continue hiding it and leave things the way they are although already feel myself pulling away from her. I cannot still be her friend after finding that out; at least not the way we used to be friends. Or, I could be true to myself and tell her and deal with the consequences. Either one will be hard as fuck though..."

"Yeah, that's true." Peyton thought for a couple seconds before continuing. "To tell you the truth, a lot of the time I hate myself for being this way. I mean, why couldn't I just be normal and be attracted to guys like I'm supposed to be? I sometimes think that it would be easier to just force myself to be with a guy and hope I learn to love him than suffer the life of being a lesbian. But then again, I was with a guy for two years and I just resented him more and more each day... Sometimes I wonder if everyone is right and homosexualtiy is wrong. I really don't know what the answer is and I wish I did."

"Oh my god... I go through exactly the same thing constantly. It's like this battle I have inside myself and it's one of the main reasons why I never came out. Another reason is that I am scared as fuck of people's reactions. I think I'd rather be miserable and lonely and not find love and have people continue liking me for what they think I am than to have them hate me for the truth and then I most likely would still be miserable and lonely and not find love."

"I totally understand your reasoning. But I refused to deny myself and live a lie. I am who I am and I really do not give a fuck about what other people think of me. I just sometimes wonder now if it was worth it. And well, like I said, I really hate myself for being this way."

"I honestly admire you Peyton. You are so strong and brave to be who you are no matter what. I don't know how you do it. I wish I was more like you."

The two continued talking for a long time and by the end of the conversation Peyton realised that she was feeling much better. So, as they were ending the conversation, she thanked Casey, "Casey, thanks for calling and forcing me to talk. I feel much better. Thanks!"

"I am glad I could have helped you out. You also helped me out. I myself was in a foul mood but talking to you helped me a lot and I am really glad to finally have someone I can confide in about all of this."

"Well I'm glad you're feeling better too and it really is nice to have someone to talk to about these matters. Someone who shares the hurts and experiences. I'm really glad I met you Casey."

"Me too! And try not to worry about Sadie too much. Maybe one day she'll come around. I won't venture to say she'll accept you but maybe she'll be able to be a friend to you again."

"Yeah, maybe. But I really don't think it's a good idea for me to be around her. It will hurt me for too many reasons."

"Yeah... that's true."

They said their goodbyes and hung up. Only then did Peyton realise how long she was on the phone with Casey. It was almost a two and a half hour long conversation. She smiled to herself and her mind ran on Kimberly. Damn, I've been such a bitch to you Kimmy.

It was after eleven and she knew Kimberly would be asleep but she did not let that be a deterrent. She had a mission and she was going to fulfill it.

She left her room and knocked lightly on Kimberly's door when she did not get an answer, she did not expect one, she opened the door and went to Kimberly's bed. She stood there for a couple seconds just looking at her sleeping. She couldn't help but smile.

She climbed into the bed and lay on her side to face Kimberly, who was lying on her back. She began poking lightly Kimberly in her cheek. "Kimmy, you up? Kimmy... you awake?"

She got no response so she stopped and a minute later she began poking her in the cheek again. "Kimmy... are you up?"

She could feel Kimberly beginning to stir so she continued poking her in the cheek.

"Oww!!! Kimmy!!" Peyton exclaimed as she pulled her hand back and looked at her finger which Kimberly bit.

"That's what you get for poking a sleeping person in the cheek!" Kimberly mumbled with a victorious smile. She had been planning that attack for the next time Peyton woke her up that way and she just got her chance and took it.

"I'm sorry, you want to go back to sleep? I'll leave."

"Peyton! Really?"

Peyton smiled sheepishly, "okay, I'm not going I need to talk to you but I really am sorry for waking you."

"It's okay. What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I just felt like we need some KPT."

Kimberly turned on her side to face Peyton, "I was thinking the same thing actually. I was just giving you some space."

"Thanks. And I really am very sorry for everything recently. I have been a bitch to you and your parents and you all do not deserve that. And I have been so caught up in myself and feeling sorry for myself that I never took the time to see how you are doing."

"I'm fine. Really. And it's okay, we understand. You've been through a very stressful period of time and you have a lot to deal with. I cannot imagine how you must feel and what it must be like inside your head. I mean, your parents beat the shit out of you and then kicked you out without even letting you pack a bag!" Kimberly's anger began to rise. It happened every time she thought of any of this.

"Hey hey, Kimmy, calm down. It's okay. I'm safe now. I just have to get accustomed to this new life. And I wanted to apologise for something else... I lied to you... I was trying to kill myself that day. But I realise that that was very weak and selfish of me. I did not think about you and how you would feel." By now Peyton was crying as she continued her confession, "I'm really sorry Kimmy... I don't deserve you as a friend. You... I..." She couldn't continue, the tears were consuming her now.

Kimberly scooted closer to her and wrapped her in a warm embrace. "It's okay boo. Honestly. I love you no matter what and I understand why you did what you did. The important thing is that you are here with me right now and you're safe now. I love you, my parents love you and you deserve nothing but the best. Don't you ever forget that."

Peyton took several minutes to compose herself. When she pulled away from Kimberly, she dried her eyes in her t-shirt and thanked Kimberly for being the best friend anybody could ever have.

"So... I never asked you, how are you liking this new town?" She asked Kimberly.

After a heavy sigh Kimberly responded, "it's nice, really, it is. I like it here. I like the people but I miss home."

Peyton felt guilty. It is her fault that they moved. Kimberly had a good life going back home. She had her boyfriend and a couple other friends. She got along well with the teachers, she was doing well in school. Things were great for her. Peyton felt that her drama caused everything to be uprooted and now her best friend is miserable.

"I'm sorry Kimmy... I wish none of this had happened. I wish I didn't go ballistic on Adam. I wish I never saw him with Sadie. I wish I never met Sadie. I wish I was a stronger person. I wish I could have just done what my parents wanted. I wish I was not gay. I wish the doctor's didn't save me. I wish I was not born. I wish..."

Kimberly cut her off, "now you've gone too far! Look boo, none of this is your fault. You are who you are. Never apologise for it and never try to change yourself because of some jackass people. Okay?" When Peyton did not answer she repeated, "okay?!"

Peyton nodded, "yeah... okay..."

There was a moment of silence as Peyton fought back oncoming tears. Once she had pushed them back she spoke again, "so... what about Tim? How's things with you guys?"

There was no answer. Peyton looked at Kimberly to see she was crying. "Oh fuck..." She pulled Kimberly into a tight hug and rocked her gently.

It's not often she was the one to hold Kimberly when she cried. Kimberly rarely got into a crying state but when she did Peyton made certain that she comforted her the same way Kimberly has always done for her.

When Kimberly was done crying she pulled away, "you know what the strangest part is?"

"What?" For some reason they were both whispering.

"I don't feel as badly about it as I thought I would. I mean, I was able to forget about it and get through my days without anyone suspecting anything for an entire week. I thought I would have been a complete wreck if this day ever came."

"Wait, you didn't tell your parents?"

Kimberly shook her head, "I wanted you to be the first one to know."

"Aww... Kimmy! You should have told me as soon as it happened. No matter what I am going through I will always put myself aside to listen to your troubles."

Peyton hugged Kimberly briefly before she let her go and made her speculation, "you know what I think? I think the reason you're not as hurt as you thought is because one, maybe you weren't really in love with Tim and two, maybe you're crushing on someone else right now."

"Maybe you're right about me not really being in love with Timmy. Because after seeing the way you look at Sadie I realise that neither Timmy nor I have ever looked at each other that way. But crushing on someone else? No! There's no one else! Trust me!"

Peyton refrained from answering the first part because just the thought of Sadie made her tear up and hearing her name out loud, well that's worse than thinking of her. "Aren't you a little defensive about that last part there?"

"What? No!"

Peyton chuckled, "there you go again, getting all defensive."

"Well if you're so convinced that I like someone I would like to hear who it is that I like."

"Kirk."

"What?! Kirk?! No way! You're off your rockers Peyton!"

Peyton just laughed, "you are in such denial my friend."