(Again please imagine her hair longer😊)

*****

“Did you get dropped as a child,” Tyler asks looking in deep thought

“I know I was,” Josh mutters

“No.....okay maybe once possibly twice but that's not important what's important is that my plan will work,” I answer

“Isabella may be fucking her professors to get better grades but that doesn't mean she's stupid, she's going to figure this shit out,” Connor says

“I don't see you coming up with anything,”

“Its weird how you are like one ofthe smartest people in your class but yet you come up with the dumbest ideas I've ever heard,”

I furrow my eyebrows at that and a deep frown takes over my features.

It's not because he blatantly called me stupid which I actually am at these type of things, I won't lie there but how does he know about my marks quite frankly how do they know a lot of things about me without me having told them.

“Hey don't take offense I called you smart too," Tyler says noting my silence

That helps so much

“Its not that, how do yo—actually how do all of you know certain things about me that I've never told you?,” I ask

“Oh um we guessed?”

“Don’t you fucking lie to me,” I say ridiculously calm

This caught Damon's attention because he stopped using his phone and started staring at me

“What did you guys do,” I ask after they seem to have lost their ability to speak

“Okay before I tell you promise to not get angr—,”

“I think we've already passed that,” I say turning my gaze to Connor

“We kinda searched through your personal files,” he mutters but I hear him very well

“Look it's not as bad as it sounds,” Josh says coming up to me

“What did you find out,” I ask after shrugging Josh's hand off my shoulder

“Its not much,” Drew says also looking at me warily

“What did you find out,” I ask again but slower.

“About how much you hate your brother and your dad and that you just tolerate your mom,”

I thought he'd say my birthday, my hair colour—okay that's obvious, my shoe size or even how tall I am. How the fuck did he figure out how I feel through a fucking computer? Oh my shrink....

“And,”

“About your past relationships, friendships but that's all we stopped immediately after we figured something out,”

I just stare at them blankly words seeming to be unable to form

“Fuck you guys," I say turning around and walking out slamming the door

“Vanessa!”

“Wait Van!”

I start running at the sound of my name and I go to the one place no one's going to find me.

The library.

“Oh Vanessa it's been a minute,” the librarian says as she sees me

“Yeah I've been kinda busy, how you been,” one of my many superpowers... the ability to mask how I actually feel. I'll just cry when I get up there.

“Oh the usual,” I nod giving her a small smile

“I'll be up there if you need me,” I say walking away

She knows about my secret spot, actually she's the one who told me about it and said that I could do anything with it. I turned it into a man cave or girl cave—actually no it's the Superlicious— yeah I got nothing. So it's settled it's a woman cave.

I go down the long aisle of books until I get to the end, I then move the bookshelf hiding the door. When I get the key which is hidden in a book I open the door and close it behind me. I'm the one who came up with the hiding spot for the key, it kinda made me feel like Harry Potter.

I go up the stairs until I reach my secret hide out.

Fuck friends, fuck life and fuck me.

I sit on a bean bag and just put my head in hands.

I should've just continued to ignore them.

Did they become my friend because they felt sorry for me. Why did I let them in so easily anyway?

Was it their amazingly handsome faces, or their great personalities or maybe they were the first people who have approached me and we immediately clicked.

This is why I stopped having friends in the first place they just hurt you.

What were they going to do with that information, tell everybody? Embarrass me?

Okay they don't seem like the type to do that then again they didn't seem like the type to go through my stuff.

I know that's not what they only found there's so much more incriminating stuff about me.

That they now know.

I'm like a magnet at these things, of course this will happen to me.

I guess what my old friends did to me back home wasn't enough, life just had to throw this crap at me.

Before I had gone to get my room keys at the start of the semester I came here to restock everything, by that I mean food.

I stand up and walk over to the mini fridge I had put in here and grab a can of soda.

I then get a packet of cheetos and sit back down on the beanbag as I switch on the small tv.

I may have stolen this from my room back home and lied to my mom and said that a thief took it, in actual fact though a thief did take it and that thief was me.

I'll just face this all tomorrow right now I got a date with the Umbrella Academy.

I feel like I'm Vanya in a way, being alone and distancing yourself from everybody else is just a whole vibe on its own. Well maybe she'll be feeling depressed or some shit but I'll be fine , so what if I won't be laughing or just feeling happy I'll be content I guess?

Well my emotions will be safe now that's an upside.

How I look and how I feel are now matching like seriously I guess when I was choosing what to wear today my brain was like ‘Bitch just wear like shit because you're going to be feeling like shit later on’

My brain is very clever, I think I'm soda drunk.

Yep definitely soda drunk, I wouldn't say I'm soda drunk unless I was actually soda drunk.

Let me just sleep all my troubles away, it's worked for me before it will work for me now plus this show is now confusing me so there's really no point in watching.

Fuck boys.

They're are pieces of shit,okay maybe the ones I talked to are the pieces of shit not all of them that'll be unfair to say.

**********

Okay so maybe I've been cooped up in this room for two days, no biggie. I mean sure I smell like shit and look like shit but who cares anyway.

The only problem at the moment is I need to get more food.

But I can't even feel my legs like seriously, I'm fucked.

I actually liked them and they had the audacity to snoop through my personal shit, I think I'm high on something, oh yeah heartbreak.......and drugs.

Okay I may be kidding on the drugs thing but still.

I slowly get up then my body aches for me sit back down so I do.

After about thirty minutes I stand up again but this time I force my body down the stairs and out of my secret hide out.

Not wanting a full blown lecture I quickly exit the library without Mrs Anders, the librarian, noticing me.

I drag my feet back to my dorm praying that none of them are there.

I open the door slowly then peek inside to see all of them.

“Fuck damn it,” I mutter angrily drawing all their attention towards me

So fucking clever Van

“Where the hell were you!” Tyler immediately asks

“Can't you say that more quietly, you're going to fucking give me a headache,”

“Fuck that just answer the question,” Josh says

He actually looks serious

“I need a shower then new friends,”

“Van—,”

“Tyler just leave her alone she's still pissed,” Connor says cutting him off

I sneak a glance at Damon whose awfully quiet, he's already staring at me.

Why hasn't he said anything?

~~~~~~~~~~~

And the heart break is just beginning😢

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Until next time❤️