Rosalie's POV

"And what happened after you drunk the soda?" Martha asked so invested in the story.

"I don't remember" I shrugged 

"What do you mean you don't remember"

"I don't remember anything else that happened on that night." I sighed "But I do remember waking up naked in another man's bed while my boyfriend looked at me with his eyes full of hurt, he looked so crushed."

"I'm sorry" 

"Martin, he said I came onto him, he called me a slut, a whore and Dash believed him, hell everyone believed him" Tears rolled down my cheeks. "And you know what Dash did, he dragged me to his house, I tried to apologize but he didn't listen, he hit me" I cried even more at the painful memories "He called me names and raped me."

"No" Martha looked at me with sympathy before hugging me.

"He raped me and left."

"Did you report him or something?"

"No" I shook my head "He raped me, everyone heard and knew it but no one, no one cared enough to do anything about it, others said I deserved it for being a whore" 

"Is that why you left?" Martha asked in barely a whisper and I nodded. 

"I couldn't stay there anymore, I don't even know why I went back in the first place" I smacked my head "I'm so stupid, I'm an idiot" I cried uncontrollably. 

"Did he take Cage away from you?" she asked and I nodded.

"He doesn't want me in his life anymore" I broke down.

"Rosalie" 

"He doesn't want me, he hates me, everyone hates me!"

"Rosalie you need to calm down." Martha tried to calm me down but I couldn't 

"You are going to have a panic attack if you don't stop crying"

"My son hates me, Dash hates me, everyone hates me" I kept crying.

My life was a mess and no one could fix it not even the moon goddess, I was cursed to be alone for the rest of my miserable pathetic life.

Dash's POV

"You decided to come back" I stared at Shaun who just walked into my office. "What do you want, to punch me again" 

"I'm sorry for that alpha." He sighed making me scoff

"You sound so pathetic Shaun but away from that, you need to check the borders and make sure they are secure after the breach"

"There was a breach?" 

"Yeah, of course you would know if you were here doing your job." I taunted 

"I'll get on it" He gave a curt nod.

"And I didn't tell her to leave she left on her own regardless of the fact that you asked her not to, she's selfish thinks about no fucking one but herself, I know you don't see it now hell, I didn't see it either but after everything she did I changed my mind." I chuckled at how pathetic I was. "And yes I do acknowledge the fact that I did abuse her, I've never sugar coated it or denied doing it and you know what I don't regret it, not even a little bit and if I could do it all over again I would."

"This isn't you Dash-" Shaun started but I stopped him.

"Everyone thinks they know me, they think they understand what I go through every single fucking day but non of you have any idea."

"Then try making us understand"

"Says the guy whose has a perfect relationship with his mate" I mocked "Tell her to chat on you with the one person you hate the most"

"We all make mistakes Dash and the sooner you accept that the better." Shaun sighed and left my office.

Nobody knew how I felt, they couldn't even if they wanted to. I tried so many times to get over Rosalie, I drunk myself to sleep, I took drugs, I broke things and slept with different women but it didn't work, it just made me resent myself even more. 

Why was I not enough for her, what did I do wrong when all I did was love and protect her, was she always pretending to love me the entire time we were together.

"Fuck" I growled pouring myself some bourbon and downing it in a go.

'You were a good for nothing broken boy to her' the voice in my head begun taunting like it did every single time I thought about her.

'Who can ever love you' it laughed at me.

"Shut up!" I exclaimed putting the whole bottle of alcohol to my lips and chugging it down.

'Just look at yourself, you are pathetic' 

"I said shut the fuck up!"

'She was going to leave eventually, just like your mother did.' it tsked 'And Cage will leave you too'

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" I screamed 

'You are going to be alone, all fucking alone, everyone will leave you!' the voce kept becoming louder and louder.

"Leave me alone!" I pulled at my hair ripping some of it off my sculp. 

'Look at you, you don't even deserve to be an alpha, you are too weak and pathetic, everyone tramples all over you like some filthy rug.' 

'No wonder your father prefers Eric and Penelope to you, you are a bastard.'

Not wanting to hear the voice anymore I took the one thing that could knock me out. Wolf bane. Getting the liquid substance from my drawer, I injected it into my system. Wolf bane was one of a wolfs weaknesses but if taken in small doses it couldn't do much harm plus I was an alpha so it didn't affect my body as much as it did to others. 

Feeling light headed I put my head on my desk and let the drug take effect even though it only lasted in my system for a few hours. Wolf bane had been my way to cope with life ever since I was 7, after my father sent me to stay with my mother and her awful mate for 3 years. He didn't want his bastard child to be there when him and his mate got crowed as leaders of this pack and my mother, she didn't really want me with her either and her mate William made it crystal clear. 

I still remember how he would starve me, I ate twice in a week only and my mother saw nothing wrong with that, even when he would beat me till I fainted she did nothing, not even help me tend to my wounds all she ever did was tell me how much of an inconvenience I was and that I needed to leave, I was only 5 at the time and since my father said no to me going back, I had no choice but to endure all the pain. I remember after hearing a friend of William's explained how wolf bane could weaken wolves, I stole some and every single time William finished hitting me I would inject myself with it and pass out on the cold floor I called a bed. 

After undergoing 3 years of abuse my father decided to come and take me away, I thought he did it because he loved me but boy was I wrong, he only did it because my grandparents forced him to, I was the heir and next alpha in line according to birth right but my father didn't like that so tried to change the law but my grandfather rejected his plea, he wanted to make Eric alpha instead of me, I remember standing by the door and listening to him say I was a bastard and unfit to be a leader or better yet his son. 

"Daddy" A small voice called but I didn't want to wake up.

"Daddy" the small voice was accompanied by a slight shake on my leg.

"Hmm" I hummed getting my head up to look at my soon who was looking at me with a frown. 

"Are you Ok?" he asked worry filled in his voice. 

"Yeah buddy, I'm perfectly fine just sleepy" 

"You wanna take a nap with me?" 

"That would be really nice" I smiled 

"Come, lets go to my room" He took my big hand and lead me out of the office to his bedroom.

"I heard you screaming at someone, who was it?" Cage asked while we were laying on his bed.

"Just one of the guards" I lied. 

"Is being alpha difficult?"

"Not if you are smart" I chuckled.

"I'm smart, so I'll be a great alpha right?"

"Yeah, you'll be the greatest." I chuckled.

"Hm, alpha Cage Kingston, it has a ring to it" He smiled at me and I laughed.

"Indeed it does" I smiled and hugged him.