She clears her throat, causing me to slip out of whatever trance I was just in.

"Oh um it's um no problem."

No problem, really Cy? That's the best you can do?

"I am really sorry Josie, if there is any way that I can help either of you please do not hesitate to ask."

"Cypress I know you're not the biggest fan of my father, why are you here?"

"If my being here is upsetting you I can leave, I just came to show my support for the both of you and if that is how I can support you right now, I can leave."

"Calm down, you're going to make a great leader Cypress, maybe you should give it a shot the school might need you now."

I don't like this topic.

"Was it Hope?" Josie seems taken back by the abrupt question.

"Yeah maybe if you were there we would have figured it out sooner."

"Josie more than ever I wish that I was in that hospital with you today, but I think you and I both know Hope wouldn't just hurt someone. She saves people, she's the hero."

"Not right now, her humanities off." I stand there with my jaw slacked.

This is a problem, a really really big fucking problem. The most powerful creature in the world, with no emotions.

Not a great combo.

I catch Josie's face falling at the mention of the words, it might be the first time that she has said them out loud, making them more real than they could ever be.

So I do the only thing that I can think of to comfort her.

I pull her into a hug and move my hand to the back of her head and guide it down until she's resting her forehead on my shoulder.

She's a little resistant at first but soon she gives in and although I can barely hear her crying her body is shaking against mine. I start to stroke her hair while shushing and whispering to her.

"It's okay Josie let it out, you're so strong."

I feel her start to stop shaking before she pulls away. When she does I let go of the firm hold I have on her body.

There's a tear sliding down her face and before she can wipe it away I raise my thumb to her cheek and gently wipe it away with a small smile.

"Babe, what are you doing, we're leaving."

"Coming."

Josie mouths the words thank you to me before she turns on her heels to follow Finch.

Jed walks up to me.

"What was that?"

"I'm not sure."

"Well we're leaving, are you coming?"

"No thanks man, I'll walk." He gives a shrug and a wave before he gets in the van. As soon as it's out of sight I start to walk in the direction to go to my parents cabin.

When I get there all the lights are turned off because it is way later than anyone would be entering this house.

It's probably close to two in the morning, so I walk in quietly and sit down at the dining table.

Feeling a headache start to form I bury my head into the protection of my crossed arms, and even though my eyes are closed I can hear the light switch being turned on.

It's mom, I know it is because I can hear the drag of her slippers on the hardwood floor getting louder as she makes her way over to me, but I don't lift my head up from its darkness.

She sits at the chair to my left and raises her right hand to start working through the coils of pain that I have at the base of my neck.

Something that used to be a practical daily routine when I would get overwhelmed with lacrosse and a headache would set in before a game.

"What's going on Ro?"

"I don't know what to do or how to help mom, our headmaster is in a coma and probably won't recover and that's if he's not dead already. Josie and Lizzie aren't ready for that, no one in that school is ready for that, I don't know if we have anyone who is willing to fill in as headmaster or even just as an adult at the school. It was Hope who did that to their father so not only was it someone they trusted it means that Hope doesn't care what she does while her humanity is off and that is scary on its own. Then there's the new wolf who is testing pack dynamics at the worst time possible and it's creating tension in the pack that is not needed and I do not think that I am ready to step up yet. Mom, I just don't know what to do. My head is spinning."

She takes a deep breath preparing herself for what she is going to say to me. I know it's going to be hard for me to hear.

"Cypress Rowan Merrick I am not going to force you into something that you are not ready for but I have to know that you're willing to listen to me when I say this."

I nod showing her that I am all ears.

"People have had faith in your leadership since you were 15, now it's three years later and most of the people who backed you don't know why you haven't taken that step up. You know that your father and I love Jed, he is a great boy with stellar manors and he is always going to be welcomed into this household, but you have been a wolf for two thirds of your life. Yeah we have had hard times but for the most part you have kept your head leveled and have always done what you think is best for that pack. You tried your best to stay out of it yet you are still the second in command for them, that should tell you something."

I feel my eyes welling up at this point. I don't know if it's because of the fact that I'm overwhelmed with all of this or the fact that I know what she's getting at.

"You're the only one who is hesitant about this decision. I think you're doubting yourself sweetheart, and I understand your concerns but your father and I didn't raise you like that. We both have full faith in you and the way you are going to lead. We will be here to support whatever decision you make and you know we will always support the pack with you. You don't have to do this alone."

I am crying at this point, can you blame me, that is all I wanted to hear. I can't even get a word out so she continues.

"So even if you don't take the route of becoming a leader in the literal sense, do it for the school and your friends. They will be looking for a strong personality for someone to lean on and I think that could be you. So be there for the twins, they are going through something unimaginable and they'll probably need someone to hold them up sometimes, so support their decisions. Knowing those decisions will probably have something to do with Hope, I want you to back them, but you have to be careful seeing that her humanity is off. Hope is a sweet girl, she's probably still in there, and I want you to help her because she could have been your alpha, it's only right."

My head is spinning with all the information it received and I love her so much but I want to process it alone.

"Thank you mom." Is all I can spit out with my throat feeling unsteady.

"Of course Ro, but one more thing"

Oh god.

"You know, although me and your father have never tried to manage a school, we have built a business. If the school is just looking for a parental fill, or just people to step in with bills, we are more than happy to help the school and people who have formed you into the amazing person you are today."

"I will talk to the twins and see their opinion on it, but I should probably head back to the school."

"You don't have to go back now, you can stay the night, you know dad and I don't mind."

"I know that, but after everything you just told me and what just happened, it's not right for me to stay here in my comfortable bed while everyone is grieving at the school. I love you mom."

"I love you too Ro, please take your car back."

"I will."

I start to walk towards the door when my mom blocks my direct path.

She pulls me into a tight hug and puts a kiss on my head. That's when I break.

She holds me tighter while I cry for a minute. When I stop taking in shallow uneven gasps she lets go.

"Please be careful, I can't have anything happen to my favorite person."

"I will mom, please do the same, and don't let dad make any decisions."

"I usually don't."

I half-heartedly chuckle at her joke before I walk out of my house.