《There's A Boy in my Bed (BoyxBoy)》There's A Boy in my Bed - 24

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Elliot's hand trickles down my back, ravaging my skin - exploring my body easily; freely. His fingers slip under my shirt , the movie becoming a meagre blur of colour and sound in the background - his hot breath flowing down my neck, tingling my spine.

The onscreen character dialogue becomes insignificant, muffled by the sound of our breath as his hips grind against mine, the ruffling of our clothes overpowering the T.V. My eyes roll backwards, the red LED light fading away as his lips leave trails of kisses down my neck - cascading rapidly; hungrily; leaving no patch untouched.

I push my back against his chest as his hands venture further down my body, exploring lands never before seen by anyone else but me, his lips a ravenous army wanting more; craving more.

A groan escapes my lips as his hand journeys further, my zipper falling victim as his fingers intertwine around it - the zipper sliding down slowly, my underwear the last thin measly line of defence against his roaming hands.

All of a sudden the moment cascades away, my body a dear in headlights. My panting breath halts in my throat, the lust poisoned by an overwhelming sense of unease. My body jolts upwards, Elliot rolling off of me as my lungs grapple for air - fighting a silent war. The scarlet tinged lighting loses its romance, intensified as my eyes dart around the room - looking for something, anything, to comfort me.

"Hey, hey, did I do something wrong?" Elliot's confused words draw me back to reality, his fingers intertwining into mine as he flicks his gaze up to me - piercing through, and fighting away, the aura of fear.

"Um, I- I just-" My stuttered sentenced vocalizes the internal whirlwind of emotions rampaging inside. Our eyes communicate as I speak an eternal book through my stare, his brows furrowing in worry.

"I'm not ready for that." The confession falls out of my mouth like a pin dropping in a silent room, abolishing the sexual chemistry away - his caressing touch turning into smooth, comforting strokes.

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"I'm sorry. I thought I set it all up perfectly: the lighting, the movie, the roses...I'm so sorry." He buries his face in his hands, his shirtless torso rising and falling as he composes himself.

"It's okay...but...let's just watch the movie huh? I wouldn't want you to miss any parts from your favourite film!" I try, unsuccessfully, to inject excitement into my sentence, his eyes offering a silent dismissal as he lays back down - emotions unreadable as he slides his shirt back over his head.

Time passes by awkwardly, the film failing to hold our gazes - our eyes boredly scrolling through our phones; transporting us into online worlds, away from each other.

The final credits rolling down the screen draw us back to each other, our phones disappearing into our pockets as he turns the T.V. off. The absence of a distraction forces us to interact, my throat unable to conjure up conversation - stifled by guilt.

"I'm sorry." I whisper out, his eyes turning to me as he props himself up on one arm.

"Don't be. It's okay. You aren't ready, I can wait." I smile at him, his selfless demeanour undeniably one of his most attractive traits.

"So um, there's this party this weekend. We should go. Well you don't have to if you want. I don't want to pressure you. It's your choice." I ponder his proposition silently in my head, contemplating the decision as I flashback to my last party...that certainly did not go well.

"Yeah. I'll come." His face lights up, re-energised by my answer, an excited giggle leaving his lips. The conversation flows with ease as we navigate our way through our first hiccup.

"So um...since we aren't gonna...ya'know...wanna watch Harry Potter?" He asks the question as he already starts playing the first movie, my eyes rolling as he slides his arm back over my shoulder. How lovely.

**********

"Hurry up! We're gonna be late!" I yell at Harvey as he continues admiring himself in the mirror - honestly, there's no one who's more in love with Harvey than Harvey.

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"Woah woah woah. Pop a chill pill lil bro, no need to be yelling. I never thought my little brother would be yelling at me to go to a party. I never thought my little brother would be going to a party." He teases as he saunters down the staircase, his suffocating aroma of deodorant following after him.

"Remember. You're the sober driver tonight."

"Yes Danté, don't worry. I'll drive you home. Don't worry." I glare at him, his reassurance a direct contrast to the fine art of alcoholism he's perfected over his high school years. "Now hurry up, I got hoes to smash!" I cringe at his sentence as I follow him out the door, his cool, calm, collected demeanour a direct contrast against the anxiety growing inside my stomach.

My phone vibrates as I slide into the passenger seat next to Harvey, stealing my attention away momentarily.

Hey Sunshine. Me and my mates just got here. Still coming?

Yup. Be there soon. Coming now.

Sweet. C u soon.

"You coulda told me you wanted to go early so you could get some action lil bro, didn't need to hide it from me." My eyes shoot towards him, the confused look on my face failing to wipe the cocky grin off of his mouth.

"I don't know what you mean." My bluff fails to masquerade the excitement on my cheeks, a light coating of blush spreading uncontrollably.

"So you just smile at your phone for anyone huh? So...who's the lucky gu...gi....person?" I turn away from him as he poses the question, his inquisitiveness pushing the conversation into silence. "Bro. If there's something you want to tell me, you can tell me."

My heartbeat rises as tears prick at the corners of my eyes, the frontseat of the car now seeming confined; claustrophobic. A tear finally escapes, my turned head unable to hide the internal sorrow.

"Trust me. Anything." He repeats again, the silence filling in the absence of what would be my reply. He doesn't push further, abandoning the question - patting me on the shoulder instead. Both vocal and physical reassurance, what a great brother.

"I...I...like boys." Each word coming out after the fall of a tear, my emotional dam cracking as the tears gush out, years of stress and anxiety released in a single confession.

"That's cool. I don't. But that's cool." He replies chirpily, his bubbly personality compensating for the dampened mood. "Don't cry Danté. I still love you. You'll always be my lil bro." He turns to look at me, the reassuring look in his eyes battling away the internal fear I've held in my heart - his personality outshining the nightmares that've haunted me.

"Thanks Harvey."

"Now stop crying. You look ugly. And no boy will want to kiss an ugly person." I burst into laughter at his dumb humour, using my sleeve to wipe away the tears.

"Well guess no one will wanna kiss you, because you're always ugly." His hearty laugh erupts, filling the car as he plumps up my mood.

There's nothing like family.

A/N

Well that wasn't how the chapter was supposed to end, but I'm glad it did - even though no one asked for it, that chapter made me really happy to write.

The coming out scene was inspired by "Love, Simon" and when his Mum talks about him holding his breath around her, I'll put the quote below:

"I knew you had a secret. When you were little, you were so carefree. But these last few years, more and more, it almost like I can feel you holding your breath. I wanted to ask you about it, but I didn't wan to pry. Maybe I made a mistake." - Love, Simon.

However, I do understand that not everyone will have the same coming-out-story and that we can't always rely on our families: and that's okay! Always be safe and happy, and know that if you're family don't accept you, then I always will! :)

- YOP

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