There they were standing outside their dorm in the cold. They were able to slip on some sweatpants before making their way down. Emily standing in Lindsey's arms trying to stay warm. The three other girls walk up to them,

"Did the alarm interrupt your fun?" Rose asked

"No actually we were done thanks for asking" Emily smiled as Lindsey dug her head into her shoulder

"Please tell me you stayed on your side of the room"

"Actuall-" she got cut off by the loud speaker

"All clear, false alarm. All clear, false alarm"

"And that's out queue" Emily pulled Lindsey inside leaving Rose out there shocked

The next morning Lindsey woke up with Emily still in her arms. She admired her sleep, her mouth was slightly open, her hair was messed us, and small light breath sounds there. Lindsey kissed her jaw, making Emily stir. Her eyes opened a bit and then closed again,

"Good morning beautiful"

"Hi" her voice was groggy

"We should go meet the girls for breakfast" She whispered into her hair

"No, too soon. Don't want to go"

"But we skipped over the movie, I think we own them breakfast" Lindsey sat up and sat on the edge of the bed

"No Rose will get mad since I left"

"Well you shouldn't have told her we did it on her side of the room" She grabbed Emily's hand and dragged her up

Emily sat up and gave Lindsey a mad look

"Listen tomorrow is our last game until break..you then have me for only two more day. That is four days in total, then I leave to go back to Colorado for a few days. Let's spend today with them and the me and you until I leave" Lindsey told her

"Fine"

"We still have date night tonight" Lindsey added

"Yeah" She walked over and kissed Emily

"Last night was good" Emily smiled into the kiss

"It really was, let's do it again soon yea?"

"Of course, we'll do so much more" Lindsey smiled back at her and then took her back into the kiss

Pulling away she said "I lov-..like you, a lot" just barley catching herself before actually saying it

She knows she loves Lindsey because for the first time in a while she has been happy, all day everyday. She hasn't had an episode since they started, and she's just felt truly happy. She knows it's Lindsey because that is the only thing that has changed drastically in the past months. Emily has recently been feeling very strong about wanting to tell Lindsey she loves her. The only thing holding her back is the fear of Lindsey not saying it back or feeling the same, which is stupid because she knows Lindsey is at the same point.

"I like you too Em" she said shyly, knowing what Emily was about to let slip, "we should get dressed"

They met up with the other girls at breakfast.

"So what did you girls do last night" Sam asked as if she was clueless

"Sam.."

"You guys ready to play today?"

"Yes Rose. Are you? How was sleeping on the floor?" Emily asked

"Very comfortable actually" she smiled back trying not to show that the pain was intense in her back

"Mhm sure"

"Yea says the one who took Advil the minute they woke up" Mal added, with Rose throwing a grape at her

"Lindsey?" Sam snapped her fingers in front of her face because she spaced out and wasn't paying attention.

"Yea" she blinked back into reality

"You good there? Was last night too intense?" Rose smirked

"Rose seriously stop" Emily told her

"Last night was very wonderful, thanks for asking Rose. I was thinking about what I'm going to do when I go back to Colorado" they hummed to her anwser

"You better not go visit that ex boyfriend" Emily joked

"And what would you do about it?"

"I would have to make a trip up there and sort things out myself" she raised her eyebrows. Rose adding in a fake gagging noise

They finished eating and Lindsey and Emily had to part ways due to class. Emily and Sam had the same class that only occurred once a week in person.

"So Em..."

"Yea Sammy?" She turned her head

"This...thing...with you and Lindsey. I need to you to confirm this is an actual thing and not that now you got sex you're going to break up with her"

Emily was a little taken back that Sam would think that of her.

"No Sam I wouldn't do that to her ever. She...different. You aren't in my mind so you have no idea the impact she has had on it. You know me before I would use meds when I could to make me feel better. Majority of the time I was with you guys it was just a fake smile. But with her, it's real. She makes me feel good. Wanted. Needed. Like I'm the most important person. I'm happy, like actually happy, not fake meds happy. Like want to run in a field of sunflowers at sunset with her and kiss her like my life depended on it"

"That's sweet son"

"...I love her" she whispered as they entered the room

Sam stopped in the doorway, "have you told her?"

"No, almost, but no"

"Okay why not?"

"Afraid she won't say it back...she has commitment issues has for a while. I'm just afraid that I'm going to say it and all the happy will go away and I'll be sucked back into the darkness." She said sitting down

"I don't think that will happen, but take your time. Know you really mean it and want to love her like she deserves to be loved"

"I will Sammy" Class started

~~

Later that night Emily showed up to Lindsey's door and knocked softly

"Hey" she kissed her as soon as she opened the door

"Hi" Lindsey said biting her lip

"You ready?"

"Yea" Lindsey said by to Sarah and then took Emily's hand and walked with her out to the car

She pulled on Emily's hand, "Where are we going?"

"Mini-golfing"

Lindsey's eyes widened, "Really?"

"No, we're going to watch a movie" Said in a more serious voice than before

"Which one" she asked

"It just came out, it's called, just kidding" Lindsey let go of her hand and stood still

Emily turned around, "Come on Em just tell me where" she walked back to her

"You'll see, be patient" Emily wrapped her arms around Lindsey's waist

"I'm not very good at that" she pouted

"Yes I know" she kissed her forehead and continued to walk to the car

Emily pulled over after driving for 20 minutes and picking up food along the way. It confused Lindsey because she was told to dress nice just to get fast food. Once they pulled off the road it confused her ten times more.

"Is everything okay?" Lindsey asked curiously

"No it's time for you to go" Emily joked

"Why did you tell me to dress nice if we were just going to sit out here"

"I don't know just felt like messing with you but know you're beautiful in anything" she reached across and kissed her cheek

"This is quite the date you have going on Mr. Sonnett" she said as they climbed into the back of the car

"I know it was really hard to plan" She smirked as she passed Lindsey her food

They sat in the back of car looking out at the pitch black sky with speckles dotted all throughout it. They made small talk while eating, some about soccer, some about their family and how they think break will go. As they finished up, Lindsey lays the blanket on the floor and Emily joins her on the ground. They laid there and stared at the stars while holding hand, the picture perfect date.

"How did you manage to put in little effort and still make it the best date ever?" Lindsey whispered into the darkness

"I don't know.."

"Are you okay?" She turned her head and Emily sat up

"I.." she paused and Lindsey rose up "I know you might not be ready to hear this but...I love you Lindsey and it's fine if you can't say it back but I need you to know I love you" Lindsey sat there and shock, with lead Emily to freeze

"Emily-"

"I just wanted you to know, because I can't stop thinking about you. Every second of every day you sit in my head. Rent free you stay up there and I can't get you out. If you don't-"

"Stop" Lindsey covered her mouth "I do, I..love you too" she breathed out taking her hand off of Emily's mouth, "I've never been in love before so I don't know what it feels like, but what ever I feel when I'm with you is like a rush and I want more of it. If that's what love is then I am definitely in it"

Emily smiled and it felt as if weights have been lifted off her shoulder now that she got this out. She leaned into Lindsey kissed her passionately, mire seconds later pulling away whispering, "let's go back yea?"

"We can't both our rooms are busy" She frowned. Emily looked back at the car and then back at Lindsey. "No" Emily dragged her back to the car laughing

30 minutes later they were laying in the back of the car breathless.

"I can't believe I just let you do that" Lindsey whispered into her hair

"It was just as good, if not better" she smiled at Lindsey

"We should go back we have a game tomorrow" They got dressed and headed back to the campus. Kissing goodbye and going their separate ways.

~~

The following day was the soccer game. The two of them met up from breakfast with the other girls along, they did all the normal pregame things that they do every week. Lindsey found out she would be starting this game while Emily sat out with Rose. Both Sam and Mal started beside her.

The game started out strong Mal getting a goal within the first 10 minutes. Lindsey was being told things to do from Rose on the side line. She got a ball sent to her with an opening between the last two defenders. She was able to beat both rocketing the ball into the top corner of the goal.

Emily and Rose jumped off the bench with the other girls. Lindsey did a quick jog to the side lines hugging both girls, getting words of encouragement shouted at her. She was able to pick out Emily's voice when she heard,

"That's my girl"

Her smile grew as she made her way back to her position. Once half time rolled around she caught up to where Emily was standing there waiting for her. Emily slapped her butt as she keep walking

"That was great" she said

"Thanks" Lindsey got out as she chugged the water that was in her hand

The team was able to hold onto the lead finishing with a 2-0 win. Rose got to Lindsey before Emily could make her way,

"You did great Linds. Made me proud"

"Thanks Rosie"

"It was the sex huh?" She whispered and Lindsey punched her arm, "sorry last joke I promise"

~~

It was now Sunday, the day Emily and Lindsey parted ways for a week. There they stood at the airport saying their last goodbyes.

"You promise to call me every day" Lindsey asked as she got out of the car

"I promise" Emily said walking to the back

Emily now lifting the trunk, "And if you're feeling down you promise to tell me so we can talk?"

"Yes ma'am" she pulled out the suitcase

Lindsey felt nervous leaving Emily. It would be the first time they've been apart since they first met. Emily's happiness is an important thing to Lindsey and ever since Emily told Lindsey she was the reason for her happiness, the thought of leaving her has been scary. She didn't want Emily to fall back down and she wouldn't be there to pick her up, really no one would. Rose left the day before them.

Putting her hand on Emily's that was located on the suitcase, "You swear"

"Lindsey I'll be fine, but if I do feel bad I will make sure to call you" She hugged her

"I'm going to miss you" Lindsey whispered into her hair

"I'll miss you more goof" She turned her head into Lindsey's neck leaving a kiss there.

Raising her head to then give one final kiss before parting.

"I love you" Emily said pulling away

Lindsey's hear soared, "I love you too" she smiled, backing out of the hug walking through the airport doors.

Lindsey sat on the plane waiting for it to finally take off. She got a text from her mom.

Mom-We're having dinner with the Keller family tonight, just wanted to let you know!

"Great" she said under her breath.

Her ex-boyfriend's family.

Their families were always really close. That's why he was over so much. He had no idea that she never actually liked him and she only dated him for her parents sake. In the end she was fucked.

~~

The plane landed and she found her bag, while waiting for her dad she went through her text.

Em- finally got home, already hate it :)

3:25 My mom won't stop pressing me on getting a bf HELP

4:32 My sister got here, I'm saved

4:40 I miss you, I want to cuddle, come to Georgia

5:56 being dragged to dinner, wish me luck

7:32 dinner sucked as normal

Lindsey smiled down at her phone, when she heard a honk that then caught her attention. Her dad waved from his seat. She put her bag in the back and climbed into the car.

"Hey kiddo" He said, "I missed you"

"Missed you too dad" she went back to her phone to respond to Emily

Linds- Sorry baby sounds like it sucked. I wish I could be there to cuddle, miss you <3

"Already on your phone and you just got home"

"Sorry I had to answer Emily"

"How is she?"

"Good, I think"

"You ready for dinner?"

"Sure" she smiled

When she arrived home she greeted her mom and brother. Soon after that they arrived at the Keller's house. Lindsey anxiously walked inside.

"Hey guys" Mrs. Keller called out from the kitchen

All the family's said their "hi's" and hugged. Lindsey and her ex, Lucas, haven't talked since the day they broke up. Saying hello wasn't that fun. Her and Mike sat in the living room with Lucas while their parents talked in the kitchen

"So Lucas how's life?" Mike asked

"Good, me and my girlfriend just got our own apartment. I know we're young but we didn't want to live with either of our parents anymore, don't tell them" He smiled at the end

"Oh that...cool"

"What about you?" He asked Mike

"Same as the last years, working"

"Oh and Lindsey?" He looked at her

"I go to school in Virginia and play for them" she said

"I heard, your boyfriend must have been sad when you left" Lindsey was already over this, it was as if he wanted to prove he was a good boyfriend and she made a mistake, little does he know.

"Um..I don't have a boyfriend"

"No, she actually-" Lindsey covered Mikes mouth before another word came out

"Is single and good with it" she finished

"Oh was the break up hard for you too"

She didn't know how to answer, "yea, sure"

They ate dinner, conversation flowing smoothly until college came up

"Lindsey I heard you're playing for Virginia?" Mr. Keller asked

"Yes I am"

"How is it?"

"Good, really good there. I met some Juniors and they all became my really good friends on and off the field" she smiled

"Some of them too good" Mike joked with Lindsey kicking him

"What was that?"

"Nothing" she said

"Lindsey could've picked a better school in my opinion. She doesn't get much playing time" her mom said

"Oh no that's too bad, where else did you get an offer?"

"Stanford" her mom answered

"She felt like Virginia was the best and I agree" Mike said backing her up

After dinner Lindsey texted Emily filling her in on her awesome dinner, then saying goodnight because of time difference.

"Hey Lindsey can we go for a walk" Lucas asked her

"Uh...sure"

They exited the house walking the trail they would go on when they were kids.

"Wow, feels like I haven't been her in forever" Lindsey said hopping over a tree trunk

"Well you did everything you could to avoid me" He said

"I'm sorry"

They continued to walk in deafening silence until they reached the end when Lucas spoke up,

"I miss my best friend" Lindsey took in a deep breath, "why did you avoid me for so long, we could have worked it out"

"No.." She whispered

"Why not" she couldn't respond, she couldn't tell him why

"Lindsey just tell me something I don't care if it's a lie just tell me"

"I'm gay" She said looking up as tears welled up

"What-"

"I'm gay. I broke up with you because I've always been gay, I just had to make my parents happy. I hate that I chose you because I lost my best friend. I could tell you, I couldn't tell anyone. My parents just found out, my brother too. I moved to Virginia to get away from all of this" she motioned around her.

She heard a noise next to and as she looked over she saw Lucas get up and walk away.

The tears that were once welled up have now fallen as she fell apart with them. She cried into the darkness just like she would as a teen, under the same reasons. She finally called Mike asking for him to come get her. About 5 minutes later he showed up hugging her with out even know why she was like this.

"Let's go home yea?" She shook her head

She never told Emily what happened that night because she didn't want her to worry. Lindsey was fine it was normal, she's been doing this her entire life. Letting people down. No matter what her parents say she knows deep down she let them down.

The rest of the week went by the same, some text and FaceTimes with Emily and watching movies with Mike. Thanksgiving was normal her family was over and she decided to not tell any of them. She didn't need anymore drama.

~~

Emily's side was a bit different. After the first rocky night with her mom. The rest of the week went smoothly. Her birthday was nice to say the least, they sat around all day. The best part was when Lindsey facetimed her and they talked for hours, later telling her mom it was Rose on the phone talking about Wilma.

Thanksgiving she saw some relatives she rarely sees. Texting Lindsey throughout the day, not knowing what happened days earlier.

On Saturday she got in the car and started making her drive back to UVA thinking about one person.

Lindsey sat on the plane thinking that in hours she'll be back in her favorite persons arms.