It's Tuesday afternoon and I'm packing up my things. After Keegan proposed Saturday night apart of me felt like it was a dream. Waking up the past couple of mornings has felt like a dream. Getting to call him my fiancé makes me so happy! I decide to grab a couple photos of us that are framed on our bed side table and I put those in with my other things. Tomorrow me and Keegan leave for Los Angeles. We will be staying in a condo for four weeks while I shoot my movie Feed. My mom is going to be staying at our house and watching the dogs. I still hadn't told her about the proposal yet. She is coming over in a few hours to have dinner with us and she's bringing her things to temporarily move in.

I sent Keegan to get a few things we needed and I told him to stop by Walgreens. All of a sudden I hear my iPhone buzz as I'm folding a tshirt. I grab it from the back pocket of my jeans. I see the text on the screen. I blush and smile really wide when I see what he wrote along with the picture he attached to the message.

Underneath the message is a picture of Keegan holding a box of condoms.

I put my phone down on the bed and resume my packing after having a good laugh. After I'm done packing I'm heading to Starbucks to meet Lucy and now Ashley for a coffee. I decide to quickly text Keegan to remind him I'm doing that. In case I'm not home when he arrives.

When I arrive home Troian is walking to her car. I get out of mine and walk over to her.

She turns to hug and kiss me.

"I'll be back in an hour." She says. "I love you."

I wrap my arms around her and rest my head on her shoulder. I kiss her before she gets in her car. Before she drives off I wave to her before making my way in the house.

When I pull up to the Starbucks I see Lucy and Ashley already sitting outside at a table. They both wave to me. After I park the car I get out and join them at the table. They both get up and give me a hug before I sit down.

"Did Saturday night really happen?" Lucy asks as we all sit down.

I notice there are several wedding magazines on the table by Ashley.

"Ok don't freak out." Ashley says.

"What would you like? T, I'll go and get it." Lucy offers. I tell her what I would like and hand her some cash which she doesn't take. "My treat."

Ashley takes a sip of her coffee.

"I'm obsessed with wedding magazines." Ashley continues.

"We were talking when we got home last night. I think the wedding date needs to be set for sometime when we're done filming. I told Keegan we could take a nice long honeymoon."

"That sounds perfect! Here let me see the ring. I didn't get a good look at it last night." I hold out my left hand so she can see my engagement ring. Since it's a sunny day it gleams in the sun. "Its beautiful! I'm so happy for you two!"

"Thank you!"

I notice Lucy come back with two coffees and a chocolate chip cookie.

"So I thought I was just meeting Lucy..." I say.

"She was in the area. So I waved her over, told her she could join us." Lucy replies as she puts the coffees and cookie down on the table.

"That's fine." I say looking at both of them and smiling.

I take a sip of my coffee and Lucy breaks the cookie in half giving me the other half. We both start to eat the warm cookie.

"Mmmm." I say.

"Have you told your mom yet? About the engagement?" Lucy asks once she's finished chewing.

I shake my head.

"She's coming over tonight. I hope she doesn't think I'm rushing into it. I'm so happy. It feels right to me."

"I can't see why she wouldn't be happy. Keegan adores you." Ashley says smiling.

I change the subject.

"How are you Lucy?" I ask her. I can tell she's trying to hold it together. Even though she was the one who broke up with her boyfriend.

She puts her coffee down and takes a deep breath.

"I'm fine. I'd rather talk about something else though. I want to focus on happy things. Like the fact that one of my best friends is getting married!"

I look at my friends for a moment. I haven't told them something yet. I take a deep breath before talking.

"There's something I haven't told you two." Ashley and Lucy look at each other and shrug.

I explain to them about finding out I was pregnant and having the abortion. Only my mom, Lulu and my friend Rebecca knew. I hadn't told everyone yet.

"Are you alright?" Ashley asks me looking concerned. I turn to Lucy who looks a little more shocked but concerned as well.

"How's Keegan?" Lucy asks.

"He's fine. We're both fine. He's been absolutely amazing. Saturday night when we went home was the first time we were inta...together again. I wasn't ready for a few days afterwards. Keegan didn't even bring it up. When we tried I pushed him away a couple times. Although last night it was perfect. I missed him."

For a couple minutes none of us say anything. Ashley and Lucy reach their hands across the table touching mine, their faces full of understanding.

"Who wants to look at these bridal magazines I brought with me?" Ashley says holding up four different bridal magazines. Me and Lucy both squeal and then we all begin looking at them after Ashley hands us one.

"Hey why do you get two?" I ask noticing me and Lucy only have one.

"I'm looking at one for your wedding. The other one has ideas in it I like."

"Has Tyler proposed?" At my question Lucy looks up from her magazine.

Ashley shakes her head. "Not yet. But you never know. It's never too early to start thinking about what you want for your wedding."

Me and Lucy both roll our eyes and laugh.

I'm outside with the dogs. They're running around in the backyard and I'm sitting on the edge of the pool letting my feet cool off in the cold water. It feels very refreshing on this hot day. A little over a week ago just before Troian found out she was pregnant, I had gone over to ask her mom and dad for their permission in me asking Troian to marry me. They had both fully supported me in doing this. When Troian found out she was pregnant, it only made me want to be with her even more. Even though we wouldn't be seeing this pregnancy through, it made me think just how much I wanted to spend my future with her and one day be the father of our child or children.

I pick up my phone which is sitting down beside me. I pick it up and scroll through my contacts. When I find Deborah's number I press dial. It rings a couple times before she answers.

"Hello?" I say.

"Keegan?"

"Yes it's me."

"Sorry I'm just getting into my car. I can hear you better now. How are you?"

"I'm good. Great actually. I have some really good news!"

"Did she say yes?" I can tell by the tone in her voice she is anxiously awaiting my answer and hoping for a yes.

"Yes! Yes she said yes!"

"That is wonderful! I'm so happy for you two!"

We talk for a few more minutes before saying our byes and hanging up the phone.

An hour later I arrive home to find Keegan sitting on the couch. His back towards me watching Game of Thrones. I walk over to him and wrap my arms around him kissing him on the neck. At this he turns around and kisses me.

"I love you." He says. I walk over to him and sit down beside him on the couch cuddling up next to him. "How was your coffee date with Lucy?"

I laugh as I think about us looking at bridal magazines with Ashley.

"Ashley was there too actually. She was out and Lucy invited her to sit with us. It was more fun. Ashley brought bridal magazines. We were looking at them."

"Get any ideas?" He asks me.

Keegan turns down the tv and I make myself comfortable so I can look at him.

"I know exactly what I want. If you want the same thing. Right now though I just want to enjoy being engaged." I tell him.

Keegan nods his head. "I agree. Whenever you're ready to start planning tell me."

"How about this. We get through the movie shoot and Christmas. Then in the new year we start planning." I tell him. I take my hands in his looking into his gentle eyes.

Keegan moves closer to me and pulls me closer to him. He wraps his arms around me and I lay my head on his chest closing my eyes for a couple minutes.

"I guess we should get ready." I tell Keegan. I sit up on the couch and my dogs come running over to me.

I finished watching an episode of Game of Thrones with Troian and now we're in our bedroom freshening up before we have dinner with Troian's mom. I put on a white tshirt with dark jeans.

"Is that new?" I ask admiring a navy sundress that Troian is wearing. She turns around and nods her head.

"There's this new vintage boutique I came across when I was on my way home." She replies with a smile.

I walk over to her and put my arms around her. We stand back and I take her hand looking at the engagement ring.

"Remember when you said you wanted to be my special guy? Last year on my birthday?" I look up into her eyes and think about that night.

"I do." She strokes my cheek with the side of her soft hand.

"Come on let's go downstairs." As Troian says this Dan jumps off our bed just having woken up from a nap.

As soon as we our downstairs we hear a knock at the door. We go to answer it and find my mom standing there with a suitcase. She opens her arms and I hug her.

"Hi honey." She says as she hugs me. We pull apart and I notice her smiling as she sees Keegan coming up from behind me. He hugs her and then we all head inside. Keegan takes her luggage up to the guest bedroom and it leaves me and my mom to talk in the kitchen.

I grab two wine glasses from a cabinet and put them down on the island. I pour some white wine into them. My mom is sitting down on a stool across from me on the other side of the island.

"I have something to sho..." I start but my mom stops me.

"Keegan asked me and your dad for his permission to marry you. We saw him a little over a week ago."

"Oh." Is all I manage to say. "And?"

"We're happy for you."

"You don't think it's too fast?" I reply.

My mom shakes her head smiling.

"Every time I'm around you two I can tell he really adores you. I'm so happy for you sweetie."

"Aww mom." The tears start to spring from my eyes and I walk over to my mom to give her a hug. "Thank you. I love him so much."

When we pull apart from our hug we both notice Keegan walk into the kitchen. I can tell by the look on his face that he knows what we were just talking about moments ago. I begin drinking my wine and then I realize I forgot to show my mom my engagement ring.

"I almost forgot. I didn't show you my ring!" I hold my hand out and my mom leans over to admire it.

"It's gorgeous!" My mom says beaming.

"I have to text Nick!" I think of my younger brother who I haven't seen for a little while.

Half an hour later

We're all sitting outside having dinner. We chat mostly about the party and the proposal.

It's Tuesday night and I'm back in my condo relaxing after a long day of filming Suits. I'm sitting on my couch with Meghan who is resting. I turn the tv off and the next thing I know I'm picking my phone up from the table in front of me. I open my contacts and I stare at Troian's number. I briefly look at Meghan fast asleep beside me and then back at my phone again. All of a sudden I click on my photos and I see one that catches my eye. It's a photo of me and Troian spending a weekend in Canada last July. I stare at it for a couple minutes as I smile and remember it. Just us being together. We look so in love this photo. What the hell did I do? I guess I deserve how I'm feeling right now. I have to live with the fact that I'm not good enough for her. The problem with that is that isn't acceptable to me.

I decide to get up and call my best guy friend Babar. I make my way to my room and sit down on the bed and I dial his number. It only takes a couple rings before he answers.

"Pat, what's up?" He says.

"I miss Troian."

"Dude you have to move on."

"I'm having a hard time with that. I wan..." Before I can continue Babar cuts me off.

"You should see popsugar.com. There's a picture of Troian out with some friends on Saturday night. She looks pretty cozy with Keegan."

I open my laptop and type in the website address. First I see a picture of her holding up a piece of birthday cake and looking really happy. Then I scroll further down the page and see the pictures of her with her friends. The last picture is the one that burns in my mind. Troian with her arms wrapped around Keegan and kissing him on the cheek.

"Patrick are you there?"

"Uh I have to go." I say before ending the call.

I make my way out into the living room and sit down beside Meghan on the couch again. She is still asleep. I pull a blanket over her. After I sit back on the couch and let myself relax I can't help but feel how being with her is starting to feel like a huge mistake. At the time when we were first hooking up, I hadn't seen Troian in weeks. It was starting to take a huge toll. Meghan was there and helped me through some hard days. After we hooked up once I never meant for it to happen again. Although it did. That's why Troian ended things. I might not be fully ready to face that but eventually I would have to. Although it wouldn't be easy. Even though it's been a few months missing her still hurt. At times it was worse. I decide to find the picture on my phone and delete it. Once I have I breathe a sigh of relief. Deleting the picture was a start to moving on. Moving on and moving forward.

"She was in tears. It was a beautiful moment." I'm sitting outside with Troian and her mom. We just finished dinner and I'm telling her mom about the proposal.

"I remember you crying a little as well." Troian replies with a smile and light tap on my shoulder.

A few minutes later we all head inside. The dogs follow behind us.

We make ourselves all comfortable in the living room and chat for a bit.

"Who wants leftover birthday cake?" Troian asks looking at me and her mother.

"Great idea!" We both announce happily.

I sit down with my cake beside Keegan who is sitting on the couch. My mom is sitting on a couch to the right of us. "This cake is delicious!" She says in between bites.

"It's red velvet! The same type I want for the wedding." I reply.

"I agree." Keegan says.

When we finish eating our cake we say good night to my mom and head up to our bedroom. My mom decides to stay downstairs and watch a movie. I smile when I see Dan has curled up on her lap. I poke Keegan in the arm and gesture for him to look. When he does he beams.

"That's adorable." He replies.

When we're in our room tucked under the covers I decide to check my phone. I'm on Instagram and come across a picture on the home page. It's a picture of me with my arms wrapped around Keegan from Saturday night. My mouth drops open. I click on the picture which was posted by popsugar.com.

Troian celebrates her 30th birthday Saturday night in Los Angeles with Pretty Little Liars costars.

I keep scrolling on Pop Sugars Instagram account and the next picture I see is one of me kissing Keegan on the cheek. I put my phone down and set an alarm for early the next morning.

For a few minutes I lie awake thinking. No one paid much attention to me being in a relationship with Patrick. People still stopped us on the streets. Although it was mostly because they were a huge fan of me and Pretty Little Liars. My life was slightly a bit more simpler and quiet. I remember I still have a picture of me with Patrick on my phone. It was taken last summer when I was in Canada with him. I reach for my phone and delete it. I won't change for a minute my life with Keegan now and what it will become in the future. No matter how crazy it might become. It will be a beautiful life and I'll get to spend it being his wife.