{13 Fansign in Busan

Yoongi POV

She was leaving, she was actually leaving. This is what you wanted! I told myself but still my heart hurt by the thought of her leaving. The thought of never seeing her again crossed my mind, and just thinking about it hurt me so much that I couldn't take it.

''Wait!'' I said and grabbed her wrist.

She looked back at me, surprised, her eyes were glistening like she was about to cry. It hurt me thinking that I had hurt her, all I could think about was hugging her and comforting her. Telling her that everything was going to be fine. That as long as we had each other we would be fine, but that just wasn't the truth. Her life would completely change by being with me. Everything had to be kept secret and even then it was just a matter of time before fans would find out. I knew by experience fans could me merciless, she would be flooded with hate comments and I couldn't do that to her. I couldn't risk taking her into my life and destroying hers with my selfish decision. No, it was better if she would just go on living her own life, despite how much it would hurt me.

I wasn't telling the truth when I told her it was not going to affect us, though it was not particularly a lie either. The moment soulmates were apart from each other an evolutionary trait made it possible for soulmates to be aware of each other's well-being and emotions. So, when I got sad she would get sad, when I am happy, she will be happy, when I was tired she would be tired, etc etc. It wouldn't physically hurt you, though you feel each other's pain. Still, for some soulmates, knowing these things made it difficult to be apart from each other. It was mentally very challenging.

''Wait'' I repeated, ''Give me your phone.''

''What?'' She asked confused.

''Your phone? Can I use it for a moment?'' I asked.

''Why?'' She asked still confused.

''I'm giving you my number,'' I replied.

''I thought you didn't want to be with me,'' She sneered.

Her words hurt me, even though it had been actually what I had said to her, it still hurt hearing it coming from her mouth. Had it hurt her just as much?

''Just in case something unexpected happens, I want you to be able to contact me,'' I explained.

''I don't care, '' She spat back and then turned around and started leaving. I ran after her and grabbed her arm forcing her to face me.

''Please!'' I desperately said and felt tears welling up in my eyes. I quickly blinked them away but looked at her, pleading her with my eyes.

''Just in case, you don't have to do anything with it,'' I said.

I needed her, I needed to be able to contact her. I couldn't bear the thought of just letting her walk out with nothing. With no way of contacting her ever again. I wouldn't know how to find her, I knew nothing about her.

''Fine.'' She finally replied and sighed when she grabbed her phone from her pocket and handed it to me.

I quickly enter my number in her and saved it under my name, before handing it back to her I called my number so I had her number as well.

''Thanks,'' I said and held out her phone for her.

''Goodbye Yoongi,'' She said and snatched the phone from my hand and walked away. The moment she started walking away I slowly felt her heartbeat leave my chest too. I put a hand on my chest trying to savor the little moments of her heartbeat I had left. When she was gone I sank onto the ground, devasted. The moment I had locked eyes on her during the fansign event, it had felt incredible. She was perfect and so incredibly beautiful. If I weren't an idol I would have never left her side again.

''Yoongi? Are you alright?''

I looked up, Namjoon was looking at me worried.

''Yeah, yeah I'm fine, just tired,'' I replied and got back up. ''Let's go back to the hotel.''

Namjoon and I walked back to the dressing room where I changed into some more comfortable clothes and grabbed my stuff. We walked back to the van parked at the back entrance, fans had gathered at the back entrance and waved is off when we were escorted to the van by security. Everyone was happily waving at me and the other members, occasionally yelling a member's name and telling them they loved us. I waved back, but couldn't help scanning the crowd wondering if she might be here too. She wasn't of course. When I entered the van I unlocked my phone and scrolled past the dozens of unimportant notifications, most were from people you didn't even know. It had always puzzled me how random people were able to get my number, but I had gotten used to it now and ignored them. Then I opened the little call icon, I just had one missed call, of course, I knew who had called, it had been myself on her phone. I clicked on the number and then on save contact. Then I just stared at the screen, she never had told me her name. I couldn't believe I didn't even ask for her name. Everything I had done and said to her had felt so wrong. so wrong... but it was better this way, wasn't it?

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So, now you know why Yoongi did what he did. Do you guys agree with? Or think it is being stupid?

Currently, I am sitting on a bus on my way to Paris! Tomorrow I will be attending BTS their concert. And I am sooo Excited! ! I have been a fan since 2013, but unfortunately never had the chance or money to go. But tomorrow my dream is finally coming true!!!

I have been trying to upload this since Thursday, but for some reason, it didn't want to upload on my phone. I finally found the time to go onto my laptop. I went to the concert yesterday! And it was sooooo amazing!!! They were sooooo beautiful and energetic and amazing. It was everything I hoped for and much more!!! My emotions are all over the place and I don't know what to do with my life now.