"Archer! Archer, wake up! Archer!"

I bolted upright with a gasp, my heart pounding wildly against my chest, my hair matted to my face with sweat.

Hadley was leaning over me, looking beyond frightened, her eyes wide.

"Archer?" she whispered, reaching out to touch my face. "Are you alright?"

I dragged my hands through my hair and took a deep breath, forcing myself to speak.

"I'm...okay. Yeah. I'm fine."

Hadley scoffed and squirmed closer to me.

"Archer, you were thrashing around on the bed and talking in your sleep."

I had no recollection of that.

I just remember I'd been having this dream where I'd been walking down this hallway. I could barely see my hands in front of my face, but I knew that whatever that was at the end of this hallway was something...important. Something very important.

And then I'd woken up.

"What was I saying?" I asked Hadley.

"Something about you finding someone or something," she said, frowning. "I'm not really sure. I couldn't really understand you."

I laced my fingers through hers tightly and kissed her hand.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you," I said.

Hadley gave another scoff, rolling her eyes. "You didn't scare me."

"Uh-huh. Right."

"Look, Archer." She grabbed my face in her hands, locking eyes with me. "If you were having dreams...you know, dreams about...that - "

"Hadley, it's nothing. They're just bad dreams," I said. "Bad dreams happen to everyone."

"I know that," she said exasperatedly. "But dreams...sometimes they can mean something else."

"Like what?" I snorted. "Premonitions, you mean?"

"I wouldn't put it pass Havoc to mess with you in your dreams, is what I mean, Archer."

Oh.

Well, I hadn't thought of that. Hadley would know how this guy operated better than I would.

"Maybe you're right," I finally said. "Maybe. But can we talk about this some other time? It's Christmas Eve, for God's sake."

Hadley sighed exasperatedly and dropped her hands.

"We're going to have to talk about this sooner or later, Archer. It's been almost a month. Have you even thought about any of the fears you need to conquer?"

"Yes."

Yes was my automatic response, but in reality, that was probably a big fat lie. Technically, I had been thinking of things that didn't exactly trip my trigger, but those moments didn't happen very often. It was something I didn't like to think about. And what had I always done? Avoided things I didn't care for like hell.

"Oh, really?" Hadley said dryly, raising an eyebrow. "Like what?"

When I didn't answer for several moments, Hadley sighed again and pulled herself out of bed, heading for the door.

I could hear plenty of voices downstairs, people already up and about for coffee and breakfast. If I knew my family as well as I thought I did, Hadley would be pulled into conversation for the rest of the day with all of the women and I wouldn't see her again until tonight at Christmas Eve mass.

"Hadley."

She stopped, her hand on the door.

"Yes, Archer?"

Her voice was clipped and tight, clearly annoyed with me. And she had every right to be. I just had no idea how to convey to her that this might literally be impossible for me.

"I'm sorry," I blurted out. "It's just...this isn't easy for me."

Hadley turned around and gave me this look somewhere between concern and aggravation.

"Look, Archer, I know this isn't easy for you," she said. "You think it was easy for me back in high school? Not a chance in hell. But it can be done."

Right. Of course it could be done.

I dragged myself out of bed and pulled Hadley into my arms, tucking her up under my chin.

"I will do this," I told her quietly, hardly able to believe the words were coming out of my mouth. "I know I can. Just...give me some time. I need time."

Hadley pulled back and stared up at me, her eyes bright with unshed tears.

"That's the thing, Archer. We don't have time."

Looking down at her pregnant stomach, I realized she was entirely right about that one.

"Pancakes are ready!"

"Coffee, anybody?"

"William, knock it off! You're supposed to eat your food, not play with it!"

The kitchen and dining room were a cacophony of noise as I joined the family, showered and dressed, my stomach growling with hunger.

"Hey, moroso," Mom greeted me as I grabbed a plate of steaming pancakes. "Sleep well?"

"Oh, yeah. Fantastically."

I took a seat beside Carlo at the dining room table and dug into my pancakes, listening to the conversation around the table.

Mia was close to finishing classes in order to take her nursing exams in the spring. Carlo was still bouncing around from job to job, girlfriend to girlfriend, and I think we were all wondering when he was finally going to get his act together.

Acacia was close to finishing her senior year of high school. William was in fourth grade. Georgiana was enjoying sixth grade so far. Maria had apparently gotten suspended from school for throwing her lunch in some girl's face.

All in all, life was going fairly well for the entire family. No injuries, no sickness, no debt - everything was going was fine. And really, what more could we ask for?

The doorbell rang as aunts Karin and Sophia and Mom were finishing scrubbing clean the breakfast dishes.

Someone ran to answer the door and then a moment later I heard loud chattering and laughter, a definite sign that more family members had just arrived.

Emmett Incitti came skipping into the kitchen and was immediately pulled into hugs by his aunts, had his cheeks kissed, his hair ruffled.

Uncle Vito joined us a moment later, followed by his pretty wife Anna and their eldest son, Isaac.

"Alright there, Vito?" Sophia called to him. "You look frazzled!"

"You could say we had a little problem getting out the door this morning," Vito said darkly, shooting a look at his sons.

They both gave identical, impish grins, like boys who get in trouble normally do.

Not for the first time I found myself wondering if Hadley and I were going to be welcoming a son or daughter into the world in April. I didn't know if I'd be able to handle a boy who got into trouble as much as Emmett and Isaac did.

"Hey, Archer," Anna said, sitting down into a chair beside me. "How have you been?"

"Just fine," I answered. "Same as usual."

Anna grinned. "You don't seem too happy about that."

"I'm perfectly happy," I disagreed, wondering if that was a lie.

"Ah, auntie, Archer's being modest," Carlo said, reaching over to clap me on the shoulder. "He forgot to mention Hadley's pregnant."

Anna gasped and clapped a hand to her mouth, her eyes widening.

"Oh, my goodness!" she exclaimed. "Really?"

And then with the arrival of Hadley in the kitchen, dressed and showered, it was a repeat of last night all over again.

I leaned back in my chair and waited for all of the exclaiming to be over and done with. I was going to be relieved when all of the excitement ebbed a way a bit, and I was sure, judging by the tired look on her face, Hadley was going to be relieved, as well.

Christmas Eve was a day full of laughter and conversation. The adults caught up with each other while the kids still in middle school and younger watched old re-runs of A Charlie Brown Christmas and How the Grinch Stole Christmas.

Hadley and I joined the younger kids in watching the cartoons.

I didn't really care for "adult talk" sometimes, and this was my vacation, so I didn't really mind that I was wasting time watching cartoons.

Sometime during the late afternoon pizza arrived and we all devoured a few slices before Karin, Mom and Sophia all ordered us to go upstairs and change for Christmas Eve mass at six.

"Why are you complaining, Archer?" Hadley asked me as I threw myself onto the bed in the guest room. "I thought you liked church."

"I don't mind church," I corrected her. "I just have trouble paying attention."

"Yeah, well, me too. But it's Christmas Eve. It's the least we can do."

"Right, right."

I pulled on a pair of black slacks and a red dress shirt, but kept on my regular shoes.

Hadley changed into a pretty black dress that admittedly made me wish for a few more minutes alone with her before we had to leave for mass.

I heard loud noises and laughter coming from the living room as Hadley and I made our way downstairs.

"Oh, it's Lauren!" Hadley exclaimed, clutching at my hand. "Look, she - "

But her voice caught in her throat and her words died, and for a moment I was afraid she was going to faint again.

"Hadley, what's wrong?" I asked her. "Are - "

"Hey, Archer!"

I looked over at Lauren and opened my mouth to say hello, but then I caught sight of what made Hadley freeze to the spot.

Standing beside Lauren, an arm around her waist, too close, was Havoc.