heyooo...

I really feel like wattpad isn't what it used to be but here I go and I will keep publishing new chapters even through no one reads them haha...

❤❤🙄

Celia grabbed my hand and squeezed it hard.

"You are going to find a better job. I mean look at you. You are pretty, smart, and confident. If they don't want you, it's their loss. Not yours.", she tried to comfort me. "8 rejection letters within 2 weeks and you still think it is them and not me?"

I didn't know if I should cry or laugh. Apparently companies in Pittsburgh weren't really into hiring single mothers with unfinished law degrees.

"It is totally them. I mean these idiots didn't even invite you for an interview. If they had they would have seen that you are perfect for any job.", she complained and pushed me off my chair. Then she deleted all the emails I had just gotten and closed my laptop. Hey! There could have been something important on there!", I shrieked and wanted to open the laptop again, but Celia shook her head.

"Come on. What could have been on there? A coupon for McDonalds?" I laughed.

"Maybe." I stubbornly crossed my arms. "I love McDonalds."

"Too many carbs and fats, honey.", she grinned, and I rolled my eyes.

"Says you? I saw you drinking a large triple chocolate milkshake last week.", I responded with raised eyebrows.

She flushed but then put her hands on her hips. "That was different. Derek got it for me. And you know what they say. Do not look gift horses in the mouth.", she defended herself and sat down on my bed. I chuckled.

Derek was her high school sweetheart and they had been together ever since even though Celia decided to move back to Pittsburgh with me while Derek had stayed in New York for a little longer.

We had all gone to high school together here in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania and then we had all applied to NYU and much to our surprise we had all gotten in.

But after a couple of things had happened that changed my life drastically, I had decided to move back to my hometown so my parents could help me out with everything and Celia, who had been my best friend since middle school, hadn't wanted to leave me alone so she came with me.

We had shared an apartment close to my parents' house while we were still in College but now Derek was back, and they were taking the next step and were moving in together.

It had taken me a while to convince her that I would be fine without her, but she still visited me at least five times a week, if not more. Usually though we didn't meet here because I spent most of the time working as a waitress in a little restaurant downtown or at the hospital.

It wasn't me that was sick though. Hell, I wished it were me, not him. As if Celia had read my thoughts, she asked: "How is Charlie?" I winced.

"Doctor Thomas said he is fine for now. The last days were rough but now he is starting to respond to the new medications again. You know how it goes though. I won't be able to pay the bills for his chemotherapy and he is going to have to have his last surgery again soon so-", I stopped myself and tears were dwelling up in my eyes.

I looked up and saw the pain in Celia's eyes.

She loved him just as much as I did, I knew that, and she and Derek had been trying to help me out but neither of their parents had a lot of money so they still had a lot of student debt to pay off.

I had only gotten through the last couple of months because of Malcolm. When I thought of him, I felt my face turning white and I shook my head as if I could abandon his memories from my head this way.

Malcolm was gone and it was better that way. So much better.

Again, Celia knew exactly what I was thinking.

"You should have really gone to the police. That bastard would have gone to prison for what he did to you. He beat you up, Ally! You had to go to the hospital because of him!", Celia said angry and I knew how upsetting all of this was for her.

"I know, but what difference would it have made? He is gone now and you if it weren't for him, I couldn't have paid any of the hospital bills. Even now I am head over ears in debt. I keep getting mails from the bank."

Celia snorted and I sighed. We had had this conversation too many times already.

Celia took a deep breath. "Have you tried to find him yet?", she asked.

I knew exactly who she meant and for a short moment I thought about lying to her. I could have just told her he didn't want to talk to me, but I couldn't lie to her.

I had always been terrible at lying anyway.

"No.", I said and slowly shook my head. Celia jumped up from my bed.

"You have to tell him! He has the right to know! And you know that too.", she argued and looked at me in disbelief.

This was one of the few things we disagreed on. I couldn't tell him. I was too scared and worried about what he might do.

The morning after Damien and I had slept together, I had been so shocked and terrified that I had just left his apartment and spent the rest of the weekend with Derek. I had told him everything because I had just wanted to talk to someone.

Derek had been pretty surprised when he had opened his door at 9 a.m. on a Saturday morning and his girlfriends' best friend had stood in front of him, in a red, dirty evening gown, with messy hair, red swollen eyes and without shoes.

But he was a great listener and I totally understood why Celia loved him so much.

I hadn't found out I was pregnant from Damien until a month after the party.

At first, I had thought all the throwing up was maybe because I had the flu but then Celia had made me take a pregnancy test.

And it had been positive. It had taken me another 4 pregnancy tests and a doctor's appointment to actually believe it. And all I had been thinking about was: "But we used protection!"

Because we had. I didn't remember everything from that night, but some details were still pretty vivid.

I had been too scared Damien would talk me into an abortion or even worse, would just reject me and his child, that I didn't even try to find and tell him. I had told myself over and over again that I probably wouldn't have found him anyway.

There had to be hundreds of Damiens in New York and there was absolutely no way I would go and ask Connor about him.

I had ignored him for the rest of my time in New York and after a couple of weeks he had stopped texting me and talking to me in College.

"I can't tell him Celia! I just can't.", I cried out and brushed my dark blond hair behind my ears.

"What is the worst thing that could happen? He could reject you and Charlie and won't pay for the chemotherapy. But firstly, from everything you told me about him, he doesn't seem like someone who would do that.", she explained and gave me a punitive look.

"Can I remind you for a second that I only knew him for a couple of hours? And that was almost 5 years ago.", I interrupted her, and she shot me a sharp gaze.

"And secondly, if he would really do that, he is absolutely not worth it anyways.", she finished, and I sighed.

She was right.

"I see your point, I really do, but-"

She interrupted me.

"There is no but. Just tell him."

She rolled her eyes at me and I knew that I didn't have a choice. I had to tell him the truth. For Charlie's sake. With Malcom gone, I wouldn't be able to make past the end of this month.

"And how am I going to just talk to him? I don't even know his full name. And we didn't exactly make it to the part where we exchanged phone numbers.", I said, and Celia gave me a dirty smirk.

"You are right. You kind of skipped that part.", she said, and I flushed.

"But you, Ally, are so lucky to have a best friend like me because I already did all the research for you. I have been dying to tell you! I actually have an entire binder with information on Damien, his friends, family, and his company.

I mean it took me a while to figure out who he is but after what you told me about him I figured out that Connor's dad is the boss of one of the many subsidiaries that that are part of the Black International Inc. company, currently belonging to Ethan Black, father of Carissa, Graham and Damien Black, all living New York City.", she grinned and looked at me triumphantly, as if she was expecting me to applaud. I stared at her for a few seconds, then I grabbed a pillow and through it at her.

"You did not.", I said in disbelief.

How could she do that and then keep that from me?

"Oh, but I did. Come on, how couldn't I? You are my best friend and he is Charlie's father! Also, you know I love a good mystery. He is said to be working together with his dad to take over the company one day.

There are a few pictures of him, mostly at meetings or galas only some from when he was younger and a few pictures of some meetings with other rich people. He is always in the back though. But from what I can tell he is really handsome, and he made it on the Forbes list for the most eligible bachelors, at least he is for now.

Some magazines write that he was or is dating the daughter of a Mafia boss.

Allegedly, of course. No one could ever prove that that guy is actually in the Mafia. His daughter's name is Talia- I forgot her last name. But anyway, the whole family of the Blacks seems to be pretty private, but the gossip magazines love to make up stories about them.", she explained while she hugged the pillow I had thrown at her.

I looked at her. I hadn't even thought of that yet. I mean I had known his family was super rich and influential but...

Gossip magazines? As far as I knew, and considering journalism was my major in college for my bachelor's I knew a lot, those kinds of gossip magazines could ruin someone's life, no matter if what they wrote was true or not.

What would happen if they found out that the son of Ethan Black had an illegitimate child with a woman that hadn't even finished college yet?

I sat down, my hands shaking. I couldn't live with that. I couldn't live with being on the front page of a gossip magazine every other week. And what if they found out about what was going on with Charlie and his sickness?

"Ally? Hello? What is going on?", Celia asked and stood up.

"I can't do this. I mean- Gossip magazines? What kind of life would that be for Charlie?", I responded and suddenly the tears were back. All I wanted was for Charlie to have a normal, happy childhood.

Celia grabbed my hand.

"Charlie needs a father. You cannot keep lying to him and there is a chance no one will ever find out, like I said, the Blacks don't like too much public attention. I know you are scared. But you are not the type to just run away from your problems. And you have been running for way too long. This isn't you, Ally.", she whispered and hugged me tight.

I closed my eyes to hold back the tears.

At this point I wasn't even sure who or what I was.

"You are right.", I said finally and squeezed her harder for a couple of seconds before we both let go. Celia smiled proudly at me.

"You can do this. Everything is going to be just fine."

Half an hour later I wasn't so sure of that anymore. I had called 23 different offices already and my nerves were on the edge.

Nobody had been willing to give me the number for his office, or even the number of his assistant, let alone let me talk to him.

There were only 3 numbers left.

"This is never going to work. I mean he is the boss's son. No one is ever going to just let me talk to him."

Even thinking about how stupid I had been, made me want to punch myself in the stomach. Celia shrugged.

"Maybe, but it is worth a try and if it doesn't work there is always a plan B.", she said, and I raised my eyebrows doubtingly.

"And what would that be?", I asked while dialing the next number.

"Coincidentally I know for a fact that this Tuesday is a very important meeting here in Pittsburgh because one of the subsidiaries is located here.

And because Ethan Black is currently in California to close some deal, someone will have to represent him in the name of the company. And who do you think that will be?", she asked with a self-satisfied smile and I grunted. I really hoped this phone-calling-thing would work.

I could already see myself standing in front of the entrance of the building, screaming Damien's name and something like: "Do you remember me? I am Ally and we had a one night stand about 5 years ago after my boyfriend cheated on me and I got so wasted that I could barely walk and then I left in the morning without saying a word and then I found out that I was pregnant and now I need your money in order to pay the hospital bills for our son because no one will hire me because I haven't finish college yet!"

Yeah. No way.

The security would probably think I was some crazy chick who had just broken out of the psychiatric clinic and would just call the police on me or something.

"You know I really appreciate what you are doing for me but there is no way I-", Celia had grabbed the phone from my hand and pressed the green button, before handing it back to me and whispered: "Then hurry!"

Reluctantly I pressed the phone against my ear, and I felt my heart beating faster, just like I had the last 23 times.

Of course, I knew it wasn't going to be Damien who would answer the phone, but maybe someone who knew him or could at least tell me who did.

The phone rang 5 times and I was already about to hang up when somebody picked up the line.

"This is the customer service department in the main office of Black International Inc. in New York, what can I do for you?", a friendly woman asked.

New York. There were so many memories connected to this place, now that thought about it. Suddenly I had forgotten what I had wanted to say so I just took a deep breath.

"Hello?", the woman asked again, this time a little irritated. I responded without even thinking about it.

"Hello, this is Allison Jacobs. I- I would like to talk to Damien Black, please." Celia looked at me and rolled her eyes like she wanted to say: "Amateur."

For a second the woman didn't say anything, and I was wondering if she had hung up on me but then she laughed.

"Sweety, if it was that easy to talk to the boss's kid who is, I must admit, quite the charmer, I am sure a lot more young girls like you would call here.", she said amused but she didn't sound like she wanted to mock me like the people had done who had picked up the other phones. That was a good sign, right?

"I know. I know, really I do. It is just, I really need to talk to him. It is important, I swear. Call him and tell him Ally wants to speak to him. Please I-", I hadn't even noticed I had started crying until I started sobbing. I knew I was grasping at straws.

There was a good chance he didn't even remember me, let alone know my name but it was probably my only chance. I was doing this for Charlie.

The woman didn't say anything for another few seconds, then she sighed. Long and loud.

"You know I really shouldn't be doing this, but you are very lucky that he is actually in his office upstairs today. I can call him and if he wants to speak to you I will call you back, okay?", she asked, and it took me a while to realize what she had just said.

"Okay.", I said breathlessly, and the woman hung up. I stared at my phone in disbelief. I was in a trance and only woke up from it when Celia grabbed my shoulders and started shaking me.

"What happened?", she asked, and I looked at her blurry image.

"She is going to get back to me.", I said quietly, and Celia smirked. "Told you!", she shrieked, and I wiped the tears off my face.

"Only if he actually remembers me. I mean I was probably just one of a thousand other girls. There is no way he is going to remember my name.", I said bitter and Celia slapped my arm.

"You were not just one in a thousand. And also, you were probably the only girl that left before you two could make it to a second round in the morning. That must have really hurt his ego. No man could ever forget a girl like that. Believe me.", she grinned, and I flushed again.

She had been teasing me with that ever since I first told her what had happened.

We had been waiting for over five minutes when I sighed and dropped the phone next to me onto my sheets.

"He is not going to call. He doesn't remember me.", I said pessimistically and even Celia seemed a little less enthusiastic than usually.

"He is.", she disagreed but I could tell she didn't really believe it either.

"This is stupid I told you that-" The phone started ringing and Celia and I both stared at each other for a few seconds, then she grabbed the phone and handed it to me.

"Go, go!", she yelled in excitement and I pressed the green button. My hands were shaking so bad that it almost fell out of my hand when I pressed it against my right ear.

"Hello?", I asked, and my voice was hoarse and almost cracked.

"Sorry honey, just me.", the woman I had talked to a couple of minutes ago answered. My heart dropped. So, he didn't want to talk to me. I had known it.

"Oh."

I didn't know what else to say.

"But I can put you through to him now if that is alright with you?"

My heart started beating faster again. So, he did remember me?

"Yes. Thank you.", I said with the same hoarse voice.

"No problem. You really must be someone special. He usually has a strict no-private-phone-calls-at-work-policy.", she laughed, and I knitted my eyebrows.

And he still wanted to talk to me?

My heart was pounding so loud against my chest that I was convinced everyone had to have heard it and my mouth dried out. I could hear a little beeping sound and then a happy but slow tune.

Blood was rushing in my ears and I was so nervous that I kept biting my lip until I tasted blood in my mouth.

Even though I probably only waited a couple of seconds, it felt like hours until someone finally picked up the phone.

"Ally?", someone asked and held my breath.

It was him.

His voice seemed to be a little deeper, less boyish than at the party, but there was no doubt that this was really him.