Chapter 22: A Gift

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Letter clasped firmly in one hand, I held up my skirts with the other as I darted down the stairs. My footsteps echoed loudly and I nearly bumped into a scowling Owen at the bottom.

"My pardon," I rasped out, moving around him before darting for the door that was thankfully wide open, letting in a breeze of fresh glen air.

Leigh was mounting his horse, satchels attached to the saddle. I'd gotten there just in time. I ran across the cobbled courtyard, avoiding soldiers and stable hands, waving my letter. He smiled and bowed his head when he saw me, reaching down to take it from me and tuck it safely into his jacket.

"I will see it safely into the Duchess' hands, my lady," he vowed. "And I will do all I can to have her well again."

Nodding, I stepped back and watched Leigh and the two warriors going with him ride out the gates. I prayed he'd be able to help my friend, hoping there was a god listening as I whispered under my breath. As soon as Lord Lyall deemed me stable, I would go and see her. Margaret would have the chance to be a mother.

Lifting my head to the sun, I soaked in the rays, taking deep breaths of the gentle breeze. I didn't know what to do with myself now. Torian had gone with his father and uncle to check in with a few farms and said he might not be back in time for the evening meal. Lady Lyall was checking food stocks in the kitchen and preferred to do so alone. I had no friends or acquaintances nearby to visit.

I looked longingly towards the stable. Breò-chlach was out in the field today, grazing happily amongst the other horses but his tack was in need of cleaning. Servants normally took up that task but I found it relaxing. It made me feel useful. Torian had been right, being the wife of a lord at court might have genuinely driven me to insanity.

"It's a braw day," Aileen sang from behind me.

I turned to smile at her but ended up staring in shock at what she was wearing. Dressed like a man, as sometimes I did, she stood in tight breeches and a loose blouse. Her long blonde hair was tied back in a series of coiled braids and she held a sword in front of her.

"What are you doing?" I asked, intrigued.

She grinned at me. "I'm going to train. Do you want to join me? I can wait until you've changed."

I frowned down at my dress and eyed what Aileen was wearing. Another grin and she put her sword by the door and grabbed my arm. "Come. I have an idea that will help you with my brother."

"Why do I need help with your brother?"

My question was ignored, leaving me befuddled. She dragged me up the stairs and more than a few times, I almost tripped over my skirts. Making sure I was okay, she led me into my rooms and had no hesitancy about entering the bedchamber. Spinning me around, she made quick work of unlacing me from my dress that pooled at my feet. I stumbled forward with a yelp when she went to lift my shift.

"Forgive me." She laughed at my expression, despite doing her best to keep a straight face. "I forget you were brought up amongst humans. So modest unless it's a servant."

I felt a little insulted by that but I turned to find the riding trousers I kept hidden beneath my capes. Tying them in place, I turned to see Aileen holding out one of Torian's shirts. I frowned.

"I'm sure I can find a blouse somewhere. . ." I trailed off, unsure of the strange feeling that caused butterflies in my stomach at the idea of wearing my husband's clothes.

"He won't mind," she insisted, placing it in my hands. "I steal Artair's all the time."

That was why the blouse she worse was so big on her slight frame. Still unsure, I took it and turned my back to her. I slipped the shirt on before allowing my corset to drop to the ground. It was most likely highly unflattering but there was an exhilaration in it too. Aileen nodded in approval as I reached for my sword and her eyes lit up as she saw it.

"That's beautiful," she gushed, running her hand over the simply decorated hilt.

"My mother gifted it to me," I told her, smiling.

Father had been so furious but he'd never managed to deny my mother anything. With a shared grin, Aileen lead me back downstairs. She swung her sword up just as Artair ambled past. He stopped when he saw us, eyes so much like his brother's flicking over me.

"Are you taking her to the field?" he asked his sister.

"I am."

Aileen gave my arm an encouraging squeeze. He didn't look too surprised in what we were wearing. I kept having to remind myself things were different here. A place nudity was the norm; so of course a woman wearing men's clothes would be the least of these creatures' concern. I also had to remind myself I was one of them too. I'd left my simple, human life behind.

Taking a bite of the apple he held, Artair munched for a moment before chuckling. "I must see this."

Now I was nervous. That grin on his face looked mischievous and I didn't trust it. He offered me a bite of his apple and laughed when I shook my head. We left the gates and took a long winding path around the back of the stables. My hand on Artair's elbow, he only seemed to get more excited as we climbed the small hill. When we reached the crest, a vast field sprawled out before us. It wasn't like anything I'd ever seen before.

Various weapons were set in wooden racks. Targets for archery, something I'd never really excelled at, dummies for spears, contraptions I didn't recognise. There weren't many others here. A young boy of maybe thirteen was stood with an older woman who was collecting arrows from the ground a few feet before the target. The boy looked closed to tears with the bow held limply in his hand as he stared glumly at each shot he'd missed.

A few men and women even fought with weapons. Much like wrestling, they rolled and grappled on the ground, trading punches and kicks when on their feet. This was the first time I'd seen other pack members that weren't the servants or soldiers that spent most of their time at the house.

Suddenly I felt almost shy. What would they think of me? The half wolf amongst their midst, married and mated to their heir. What if I made a fool of myself? I'd never trained like this. I'd had lessons from the man who worked with my father's guard but nothing compared to this scale.

Looking at Aileen again, I began to doubt myself. She was shorter than me, and while she was slim, there was muscle to her. When wearing her dresses she was a perfect lady, graceful and poised, but I could see the excitement in her eyes as she looked around. Just how good was she with that sword? I wanted to find out.

Maybe it was the wolf in me urging me to prove I was better than Aileen. Above her in rank. She'd seemed to sure the night before that I wouldn't compare. Even if she beat me, perhaps I could gain favour amongst the pack by showing I would at least give a good fight.

Aileen walked over to an empty area and gave me a challenging grin. "Shall we see what you can do, new wolf?"

I didn't like being called that. It made something deep inside bristle and growl out. Aileen's grin turned into a smirk. She was goading me, I realised. Giving her a grin, I unsheathed my sword. It had been far too long since I'd picked up a weapon. Pointing my sword at Torian the day I'd found out the truth of their world didn't count.

Stepping close to Aileen, I tapped my blade to hers. She allowed me time to find my footing and secure my grip on the hilt. Artair was still noisily eating the last of his apple, sat in the grass with hazel eyes on us. Nervous energy buzzed through my veins.

"Do not worry, I won't harm you too badly. Torian would have my head, you," Aileen teased.

I laughed and lunged forward. Aileen got a bit of a shock when she realised I could in fact wield a sword quite well. Her surprise then turned to excitement again and she stopped holding back. The sound of our swords hitting clashed through the air and I found myself relaxing, forgetting all my doubts and fears. Aileen was good too, better than me in fact, but she kept her word and gave me no more than a cut to my hand that healed before my eyes and bruises that would be gone before Torian could see them. Hopefully.

My new healing abilities were like magic to my eyes and Artair teased me as I stopped our practice to watch the cut seal together and fade to a pale pink line.

"You heal faster than most wolves," Artair noted, looking intrigued as he twisted my hand about to see the wound.

I wasn't sure what to make of that. Lounging on the grass under the bright sun, my hair was stuck to my skin from sweat. I didn't care. I was relishing in the feeling of properly exercised muscles. A few other wolves came to watch and introduce themselves to me. The servant, Ealasaid, had spread word about me, and her brother, Iain, had the same happy preposition as his younger sister.

He was a scout when he wasn't working alongside the blacksmith. His hands told that. Burns in various stages of healing littered his fingers and lower arms. A clumsy blacksmith at that.

"Do you not fight?" I asked Artair as he watched Iain and another male take over from Aileen while she caught her breath.

Artair shrugged, nose scrunching in distaste. "I can fight. I don't like to. I leave that to my brother and cousin. And my sister when she finds the motivation."

It did strike me as odd that she'd turned her nose up at helping me in the garden but was happy to do this. It was like she became a completely different person out here. While she was currently giving the mud on her breeches a murderous look.

Switching my attention back to Artair, watched him curiously. I chewed on my lip as I tried to muster up the courage to ask him what I'd avoided asking Torian out of fear of causing offence. Artair was a kind soul, I couldn't see him getting angry at me.

"Should you not sit where Owen sits? Won't you be Beta when Torian becomes Alpha?" I inquired, searching his expression.

There was no anger in his eyes at my perhaps personal question. If anything, he looked a little sad. Ashamed? Aileen straightened up with a frown, her hand resting on her brother's shoulder.

"I'm not strong enough to be Beta. Owen took my place a few years back and I didn't feel the need to challenge him for it. I'm happy to have the title of brother to the Alpha, I don't need anything else," Artair explained. He was staring at the ground, picking at a blade of grass.

"There's no shame in that, you know this brother. The pack love you." Aileen bumped her shoulder against his, managing to gain a small smile from him.

I didn't understand completely. Proof that I was still naive and unknowing when it came to these wolves. I agreed with Aileen though. In my short time here, we'd built up a relationship. I could see he and I being great friends.

We sat together for a while, every now and again Aileen and I would get back up and she'd teach me some new trick or move. Wolves circled round but Aileen told me to ignore them. They just wanted a glimpse of their future Alpha Female.

Picking up her sword again, she faced me. "One more time before we go home?"

I nodded, determined. Even though my shoulder ached and my sword hand was sure to have a few bruises by tomorrow, I had greatly enjoyed the day. I was almost glad my father had sold me like a broodmare. Almost.

"What in the name of the gods were you thinking bringing Màili here!"

The voice that roared across the field had everyone freezing. Torian was marching toward us with Owen stoney faced by his side. Artair stumbled to his feet. I was stuck unable to so much as move my tongue under the force of a furious and protective Alpha male.

"She has only fought against Aileen who has been very gentle with her," Artair excused, motioning toward me. "She's perfectly fine as you can see."

"I thought she'd enjoy the fresh air and exercise. She's a flourishing swordswoman." Aileen smiled brightly at me and I blushed at the compliment. But none of their words had soothed my husband.

I had to remind myself not to step back in fear as he slowly stalked towards me. He took the sword from my hand and passed it to Owen. I glared up at him.

"I'm unharmed. It was nice to have distraction," I stated.

Hazel eyes were almost gold as the flicked from my face to my hand. Those eyes didn't miss the fading bruises and I latched onto his shirt when he spun to his sister. Gone was the confident Aileen now. I hated seeing her with her shoulders hunched and head bowed in submission.

"I enjoy learning to use a sword. Such practice doesn't come without injury, husband." I tugged on his arm again and once more he started checking me over. Despite finding no other injury, a frown marred his features and he took a step back. Eyes wandered over me.

"Are you wearing my shirt?"

The question had my skin burning but Aileen looked smug. I nodded slowly, tugging at the laces around the neck to cover more of my skin. His frown disappeared to leave an almost hungry look in its place. Fingers played along the neckline, dipping in to brush against my clavicle and then over to the mark on my shoulder. My breathing hitched at the flurry of sparks it ignited, my hand on his wrist to stop him exploring further.

He smirked at me and leaned in. His breath fanned over goosebump covered flesh as he whispered, "Are you scared of finishing the game my sister had you start?"

Game? I was aware of no game.

"I don't know what you mean." My voice trembled, eyelids fluttering shut as lips brushed against the shell of my ear.

"You really don't do you, my innocent wife."

A heavy sigh and he pulled back. Forehead resting against mine, I finally managed to peel my eyes open to look at him. There was sympathy in his gaze, his thumb stroking my cheek. I wanted to tell him I hardly believed I was entirely innocent but something told me that would be me continuing the game and I didn't want to play something I didn't know the rules of.

Leaving me confused and overly warm, Torian turned to face his siblings. Artair didn't look at all bothered that he seemed to be in for a scolding but Aileen was still slumped.

"Next time please let me know before you come here so I am not led to believe my wife has run away again," he ordered.

My mouth fell open. I didn't know how it was impossible to fill with so much embarrassment in such a short time. Artair smirked and bowed his head while Aileen stared wide eyed at me. She hadn't known. Apparently neither had Owen as his eyes trailed up the length of me.

"I came back," I whispered, more to myself but of course these wolves hear.

"You did come back, with a little help." Artair grinned.

I had the feeling that him finding me and convincing me to return would keep him in Torian's good books for a while. An arm slipped around my waist and I leaned into Torian's side almost instinctually. He was warm and smelt like fresh hay. That made me smile.

"Let's make sure you return home now," Torian teased quietly, squeezing my hip. "You don't mind carrying that do you, Owen."

I eyed my sword that looked so small in Owen's grip. His jaw ticked but he bowed his head and slid the blade back in its scabbard. As we walked past him, I reached out to touch his arm, offering him thanks. He stared at me a moment before giving me a strained smile.

As we walked back, Torian spoke about the farm he'd been visiting. The man who owned it had lost a farmhand and needed help with the animals and feeding. He was part of the pack, and no member of the pack was left to struggle. If they couldn't pay rent, needed help with children, food, building, anything, there was someone there to help.

"Perhaps I could find some use for my talents within the pack." I looked up at my husband, pleading with my eyes for him to say yes.

Maybe most ladies were fine spending their days reading poetry, learning languages and dances and perfecting needlework, but I couldn't. I needed a focus, a real purpose.

"When Leigh returns, I'd like to learn more about healing from him," I continued. "I can help on the farms with you too. You know I'm good with horses."

Torian's expression was unreadable as he considered me. I thought my hopes would disappear until he smiled and nodded. "Whatever you wish, Màili, you shall have. Leigh would be lucky to have another study under him. It brings great honour to a pack to have Healers."

That made me sure I'd be alright here. I feared so much I'd bring dishonour to the pack because of what I was. Even though it didn't matter in Torian's eyes, or his families. . .most of them, at least. His encouragement eased those fears greatly.

He was still smiling at me and I couldn't help but return a bright one of my own. This man was a gift. A gentle kiss was pressed to the top of my head but I craved more and he knew it.

"You told me not to kiss you where others could see again," he murmured, my whole body jerking when his hand slid inappropriately low. "You'll just have to wait until we have some privacy."

Stuck between further embarrassment as Artair looked at us then whispered something to Aileen that made her giggle, and exhilaration at having those lips against mine again, I didn't move his hand back to my hip.