It's been about 2 days since Hershel stitched me up. He was in my room removing my stitches. "Now Raven, just because you don't have stitches anymore doesn't mean that you're all healed you still need to take it easy."

"You got it doc." I said as he walked out and Maggie came in and gave me a towel.

"Here, there's a bathroom down the hall."

"Thank you Maggie." I said taking the towel and grabbing my clothes.

"Any time. I'll be downstairs if you need me." She said and left. I walked out of the room and to the shower. Once I got there I turned on the water and watched as the room started to steam up. I peeled off my pants and underwear. I looked in the mirror and my once blonde hair was almost brown from all the mud and dirt. I sighed and got into the shower the warm water felt great against my tired body. I sighed and watched as the dirt and blood flowed down the drain. My fingers went to my dog tags and gently cleaned the blood and dirt off. I was looking at the tags as the tears started to flow from my face.

"Johnny, I miss you." I said to myself before kissing his tag and finished cleaning my body. I got out and pulled on my short sleeved turtle neck followed by my ripped jeans. I ran out of bras so it was a braless day, probably going to be a bra less well forever. All my bras were ripped to shit and basically trash and since they were all custom made I wouldn't find my size ever again. I got out and let my hair air dry.

Once I was out I went to my room to grab my boots and pulled them on. I had been cooped up in that room for so long I decided fresh air would be a good idea. Daryl had been missing for a day and a half now. It bothered me but it was what it was. Daryl was going to do whatever he wanted. I walked out and saw Andrea on top of the RV keeping watch as Dale was getting water.

"What's with the Annie Oakley routine?" Dale asked Andrea and I just leaned against a tree and listened to them with a smile on my face.

"I don't want to wash clothes anymore, dale. I wanna help keep the camp safe. Is that alright with you?" She said down to him.

Dale walked up into the RV and I followed him.

"What no hi?" I asked him. He smiled and gave me a hug.

"Glad to see you on your feet." He said and we walked into the RV and saw Glenn sitting there.

"Raven you're walking around?" I nodded and Glenn sat down with the book he had in his hands.

"Sorry. Just returning your book." Glen told Dale. He set down the water and I leaned against the door of the small RV.

"Oh. No. I'm sorry. If I had known the world was ending, I'd have brought better books." He said and he tossed the book on the driver seat and took the water to the back of the RV. I sat down in front of Glen and we sat in silence for a minute.

"Dale, you think Andrea's on her period?" Glenn asked Dale. I chuckled and Dale gave him a look.

"I'm only asking 'cause it's like all the women are acting really weird. And I read somewhere that when women spend a lot of time together, their cycles line up and they all get super crazy hormonal at the same time." Glenn finished.

"Glenn buddy, you are trending on some thin ice my friend." I said to him holding back the laughter. Dale held up a hand to stop Glenn from saying anymore.

"I'm gonna advise you to keep that theory to yourself." Dale told him.

"Who else is acting weird?" I asked Glenn.

"Maggie." Glenn said with a slight pause.

"Ah, Maggie." I said wiggling my eyebrows and Dale leaned against the counter next to him with a smirk on his face.

"She started off being mean to me. Then she wanted to have sex with me. And now she's being mean to me again. And I don't even want to know what's going on with Lori." I was trying really hard not to laugh my ass off so I let Dale handle this.

"What's going on with Lori?" Dale asked and Glenn paused and looked at both of us with a 'I shouldn't have said that' face.

"Nothing. I don't know." He said as quickly as possible.

"All right, Let's take this back a step. How do you know that Maggie wanted to have sex with you?" Dale asked Glenn. I turned and faced Glenn in the booth and crossed my arms. He got nervous and started to bite his thumb and he looked up at Dale then over to me.

"Glenn, no." I said with a gasp.

"Oh, son, you didn't." Dale told him and Glenn just smirked and gave an airy laugh.

"Did it ever occur to you how her father might feel about this?" Dale asked Glenn.

"Glenn, bud, I'm a thousand percent sure he has a shotgun and your name is written on it." I said laughing my ass off.

"She's 22." He told Dale and I.

''And he is our host." Dale kind of scolded him.

"He doesn't know." Glenn told us in defense.

"Well see that it stays that way." Dale paused and just looked around in pure shock.

"Jesus, Glenn, what were you thinking?" Dale finished.

"I was thinking that I might be dead tomorrow. Thanks for the book. You're right, it sucks." Glenn said before walking out of the RV. Dale looked at me and I just shrugged my shoulders.

"They're kids. What do you expect." I said and walked past Dale and out of the RV. Glenn looked defeated and that was till Andrea started yelling.

"Walker! Walker!" She hollered from the RV.

I was looking across the field and saw what did look like a walker.

"Just the one?" Rick asked her from next to me.

"I bet I can nail it from here." She said to Rick.

"Andrea wait!" I yelled before Glenn came over next to me and handed me my handgun.

"No, Andrea put the gun down." Rick told her. Shane came out of his tent half his shirt buttoned up. I thought by now they would have gotten rid of him. Unless Lori hadn't told anyone yet, which by his presence she hadn't.

"You'd best let us handle this." Shane said with T-dog following close behind him.

"Shane, hold up. Hershel wants to deal with walkers." Rick told Shane.

"Rick, I don't think that's a walker." I said watching how the walker was walking and how it wasn't making any sort of noise. Even at that distance we should have been able to hear it. No one even bothered to listen to me.

"What for, man? We got it covered." Shane said, walking right past me. It was like I was completely invisible. They ran through the field to kill the walker, and I just took my own time walking and jogging over to the walker. Everyone stood around the walker as I saw it come to a full stop. Rick was holding a gun to its head and that's when I noticed it was Daryl.

"Daryl?" I said at the back of the group.

"That's the third time you've pointed that thing at my head. You gonna pull the trigger or what?" Daryl said and everyone relaxed a bit.

"Where the fuck have you been?" I said walking towards him.

"The hell do you care?" He said to me and before I could say anything, a gunshot rang through the field.

"NO!" I screamed as I ran over to Daryl's side with Rick right next to me.

I kept screaming no as the boys helped get him to his feet, I noticed that the bullet had only grazed the side of his head. I sighed in slight relief as we got him to his feet.

"I was kidding." Daryl said to Rick. We turned around and saw Andrea and Dale running towards us.

"Oh my god! Is he dead?" Andrea screamed as she reached us. I felt a fire burn inside me when I saw her.

"Unconscious. You just grazed him." Rick told her and she saw the ears around Daryl's neck.

"Are those ears?" She said and her own voice sent me over.

"What the hell were you thinking!?" I yelled at Andrea.

"I'm sorry, I didn't.." She started to say and I cut her off.

"You didn't, what? Think. Use your fucking brain. I know your a blonde but, I'm blonde too and I'm not as fucking stupid as you." I yelled at her getting in her face.

"Raven." Rick said behind me.

"No one even wants you here. The only reason why you're still here is because you saved Carl." She spat back in my face and that was the last straw. I raised my fist and punched Andrea square in the jaw, she fell to the floor and I leaped onto her and threw another punch at her splitting her lip. I went to throw another punch when T-dog and Glenn pulled me off her.

"Let go of me!" I yelled trying to get to Andrea again. Dale was at her side helping her up.

"Raven, calm down. We will let you go if you calm down." T-dog told me. I took a few deep breaths and found my peace.

"Okay, I'm good." I told T-dog and he let me go. We all walked back to the house and the boys took Daryl to Hershel. When we got to the house I went inside and washed all the blood and dirt off my hands. I was fuming at Andrea. I was trying my best not to rip her head off but I knew Daryl was in pain so instead of hunting her down and killing her for almost killing him. I decided that I was going to sit by his bed for a while. Yes I was still mad at him for what happened but, almost losing him hurt me. Almost as much as losing Johnny. With those thoughts I played with the dog tags around my neck. As I looked into the mirror it was almost as if I could see Johnny standing behind me smiling his stupid grin. Him and Daryl were so similar yet complete opposite I just wasn't sure why I was so drawn to Daryl.

When I walked down the hall to Daryls room Rick and Shane were just leaving. I heard Rick tell Lori that he was going to be okay and gave me some sense of relief.

"Hey, how's he doing." I said as Rick walked by me.

"He's good, Raven. He's a lot tougher than he looks." That made me chuckle and I crossed my arms.

"He's a redneck, Rick. He was born tough." I said and I tried to get to the door but Shane was standing in my way.

"I hate to say it, but I'm with Hershel on this one. Can't keep going out there, not after this." Shane said to mostly Rick.

"You'd quit now?" Rick asked Shane with a ping of anger in his voice.

"Daryl just risked his life to bring back the first hard evidence we've had." Rick finished.

"That is one way to look at it. The way I see it, Daryl almost died today for a doll." Shane said to Rick.

"Yeah, I know how you see it." Rick said to Shane and I could stay quiet.

"Really Shane? Are you fucking kidding me right now. Daryl is the only one going out there day and night to find that little girl and you wanna stop just because your girlfriend is trigger happy?" I said now getting mad because I knew Daryl wants to find Sophia, hell I did too but, I also knew that the possibility of finding her alive was so slim. Still there was a possibility.

"First off, she's not my girlfriend. Second, I'm not out to be a hard case. Just being realistic. Rick's just gotta start making the tough calls. You both know I'm right." Shane said after Rick had walked away and I hadn't noticed that Lori was still here.

"I may not agree with all of his choices, but I respect him. I know your and mine and your way isn't harder. It's the easiest thing in the world to cut our losses and to not help." Lori said, looking over at Shane.

"Shane, you keep telling yourself you're making the tough calls. You're really just trying to justify making the easy choices." I said now standing with Lori.

"The only thing I care about now in this world is you, Raven, and Carl. So I apologize if I appear to be insensitive to the needs of others, but you see I'll do whatever it takes to keep the three of you safe." Shane said and I huffed.

"You know what. Look, you two, I know what happened before Rick and I found you. I'm not stupid so Shane protect Lori, Carl, hell protect the whole fucking camp. But, I want nothing from you. I don't need your protection and whatever happened between you two has to fucking end. I will not be the top of your fucked up love triangle. So leave me out of this." I said walking into Daryl's room.

There was only so much that I could take of those two and I just couldn't anymore. I closed the door and just let out a large sigh.

"Hey doc, how is he?" I said walking over to the chair across the room.

"He'll be fine, honestly didn't realize we would be going through this much antibiotics." Hershel said as he finished gathering his stuff.

"Yeah, well with this redneck we'll probably go through a lot more." I said as a joke but, I don't think Hershel understood. He just nodded and left the room.

"Why are you here?" Daryl said, facing me.

"Because, Daryl I may hate you right now but, that doesn't mean I don't care about your stupid redneck ass." I pulled the chair next to the foot of the bed and sat down placing my feet up on the bed.

"Raven, look." Daryl started to say before a knock on the door cut him off.

"Daryl?" The voice said, opening the door to reveal Carol.

"Oh, Raven. There you are. Dinner is ready if you want to come down." She said kind of giving me a death glare.

"Um I'll just bring up a plate for Daryl and I that way he doesn't have to eat alone." I said getting up and sliding past her. She stayed in the room for a moment after I left. When I got down stairs everyone was sitting at tables. I grabbed two plates and Rick was first to help me with piling on food.

"Thanks Rick." I said in a low voice since everyone was chatting and laughing.

"Will you meet me out behind the barn on the hill." He said handing me the plate he had filled. I nodded in response.

"What time?" I asked him, grabbing two glasses of water and placing them on a try.

"After everyone is asleep." I nodded and walked off. It was odd that he wanted to meet me, but at the same time it wasn't something we're used to doing all the time when he was having issues with Lori. Shane never knew how to just shut up and listen so when something was really bothering Rick he would come to be. Even when I was doing my tours he would video chat me at the station long after everyone had gone home for the night.

I walked into the room and Carol got up and left giving me the same stink eye. Once she was gone I set the tray down and grabbed a plate with a fork and handed it to Daryl.

"What is her issue?" I said looking at the door almost as if I could see her standing out there.

"What you talkin' bout?" Daryl asked, eating his food.

"Carol, she keeps giving me death glares for no reason at all." I said sitting down in my chair with my food.

"You're seein' things." He said with a mouth full of food.

"Okay first gross swallow before you talk and second fuck you." I said and he just laughed and we finished eating and I could hear the sound of running water and dishes clinking.

"Night Daryl." I said as I got up and placed our empty plates and glasses on the tray.

"Wait, can't ya stay here." He asked almost too quietly where he would have thought I couldn't hear him. I sighed and placed the tray back down walking over to his bed. He was half sitting up, his upper body propped up by his elbow. I sat down in front of him and ran my fingers through his sweat soaked hair. Daryl's eyes closed at the feeling and I leaned down and kissed his bandage and then kissed his forehead. He tensed up to the first kiss but then relaxed after the second. I got up and grabbed the tray and for a moment he stayed completely still with his eyes closed in relaxation.

"Goodnight, Dixon." I said leaving the room.

"Goodnight, Little bird." He said as I closed the door and in that moment I heard Johnny's voice come through.

My heart ached and tears started to stream down my face. I quickly wiped them away and took the dishes down stairs. I could hear Hershel call my name in the other room.

"Hey you called." I said as I walked into the living room where he was.

"Yes, it's time to change that bandage." I needed to stand in front of him. I pulled up the shirt and lowered my pants to my hip bones.

"Raven, you're a strong leader, so I have to ask. Why aren't you leading these people." Hershel said as he made sure my wound wasn't infected.

"Honestly Hershel, after losing my whole group and almost dying myself I don't think I want to be a leader anymore. Rick, he's a good man with a good heart. He knows what he's doing. Shane he's reckless and just wants to make the easy choices. I would never have chosen him to lead this group or anyone. I just wish I was on my own again. It was better that way. I only had to look out for me. I didn't have to worry about my own demons hurting anyone. Most of those people have no clue who I am or what I've done." I sighed as Hershel finished up with my bandage.

"Raven, do you believe in god?" I looked at him and shook my head.

"I believe there is something larger than ourselves out there but, if god really existed why would he let this happen. Why would he bring back the dead just to kill the living. This isn't what I thought he meant when they talked about the resurrection." I said fixing my clothes.

"I see. You do believe that everything does happen for a reason. So why don't you take over this group. You're a great leader and you know how to negotiate to get what you want without putting too much of yourself and the people you care about at risk." Hershel said and I sat down on the couch.

"I don't know if I'm ready." I told him with my face buried in my hands.

"Raven, you've grown on me and I like you a lot more than any of these people. You may not be ready now but, there will come a time that you will need to lead these people." Hershel said before heading off to bed. I decided that I was going to go out to that hill a little early. I needed the air especially with the bomb Hershel just dropped on me. I walked outside and the warm night summer air filled my lungs. It didn't smell like death or rot, it smelled like fresh mowed grass and clean air. I made my way to the hill Rick was talking about. The moon was huge that night and it basically lit up the whole farm. Once I got there I sat on the fence that was there staring up at the stars and the moon. It was a nice difference from what we had been seeing for a while.

I was staring off into my own world when I felt a hand on my shoulder. "Fuck Rick you scared me." I said as he took a seat next to me.

"So what did you want to talk about?" I asked Rick as I still started up in the sky.

"I know that Lori was sleeping with Shane. And I don't know what to do." I took a deep breath and looked at him.

"How did you find out?" I asked him.

"Wait did you know." He asked, getting off the fence and standing in front of me.

"I kind of did. I had my suspicions. And they kind of confirmed for me today when you left after seeing Daryl." I could see in his eyes that his heart was breaking. I pulled him into a hug, his head resting on my shoulder

"Rick I'm sorry." He just hugged me tighter when I said that.

"I thought I could trust him." He said his face was buried in my hair.

"To be fair they did think you were dead." He pulled away a bit and sighed.

"I just didn't expect her to move on so fast." I ran my fingers through his hair.

"I know that's never what we want from the people we love." He tensed up when I said that and looked up into my eyes.

"Raven. I don't think I love her anymore." He said and I could tell he was speaking from his heart. He really didn't love her anymore.