"I had a really great time tonight, Dyl," I said as I finished laughing and approached my door. "I really mean it. Thank you."

"It was my pleasure." He responded, leaning on the door frame, looking so effortlessly beautiful that I almost died. "I had no idea that you liked jazz."

"Well you can find out a lot more about me when we do this again."

"Again?" He asked with a cocky grin. "Ms. Armstrong, are you asking me out?"

"Only if you want me to."

"Well, in that case," He chuckled quietly as he leant down to whisper in my ear. "Count me in."

And just as our faces were mere inches apart, my door was thrown open, causing me to fall inside, only to be caught by the one and only, Elijah Mikaelson. And with him was who? You guessed it, Klaus.

"Midnight, on the dot. I must say, Daryl, your timing is most, most precise!"

"My name is Dylan―"

"Now, you must be going, Derek, you both have a big day of... magic selling to do."

"Oh, umm... I guess. Night, Ophe―"

"Off you go, Dick, goodnight!"

And with that, the door was slammed in his face and I was left with the two cock-blocks of the millennia.

"He was going to kiss me, I hope you know that." I growled, plopping down unhappily on my couch. "So whatever the hell you guys camped out in my home for, it better be important."

"Has he told you about his criminal record?" Klaus deflected.

"No, and unless he murdered someone with a hammer I, frankly, don't give a shit." I said

"He got expelled from school for fighting! And the fact that he went to prison for not killing someone with a hammer, but for speeding and shoplifting when he was seventeen. A little too old for being 'boys being boys', don't you think so?" The hybrid continued.

"Klaus, you have quite literally killed hundreds of thousands of people, and you're suspicious of him because of parking violations and stealing?"

"Yes. Parking violations have proved themselves to be the number one killer in America, beating out both heart disease and vampires by a wide margin. Not to mention, as a man who dutifully pays his taxes since they were put into place, he is taking my money, and spending it on his little tricks. Which, by the way, are the fourth leading causes of death in America."

"W-Where the fuck are these statistics coming from?!" I sputtered, shocked that they would even try and spin some bullshit like that on me. "Look. I don't even want to get started on this right now. I like him, he likes me. Whatever else you think about us is irrelevant and, frankly, uncalled for. He's hot, I'm hot, he's young, I'm young, he likes magic, I am magic, what isn't there to like about us? We're cute, I'm trying to live my life before psycho takes over, and god dammit, a girl just wants some action every once in a while―"

"Oh, like he could ever please you like I di―"

"I've had quite enough of you two," Elijah rolled his eyes, stopping the fighting between the us. "Brother, Ophelia is inclined, as a grown woman, to see whom she wants."

"Thank you, Shakespeare."

"But, what Niklaus did fail to mention is that Dylan did―"

"Get out of my damn apartment before I kill the both of you."

Smiling in satisfaction, the men headed toward the door, Elijah exiting with a polite farewell and Nik hanging behind.

"I meant what I said, you know."

"About what? My date killing more people with plastic wands and card tricks than heart disease or vampires?"

"No," He chuckled with a smug smile on his face. "That I can please you in ways nor he or you could ever comprehend."

At this, I was taken back. If anybody else had even attempted to make a pass at me like that, I'd have seen them transformed into the pig they personify that instant. But for some reason, when it was Klaus, I couldn't really bring myself to do anything other than blush.

"W-W―"

"I'm the Original Hybrid, darling," He whispered. "I can take care of you in ways that a human like him cannot even grasp... Well, I best be off. Have a nice night, Ophelia."

And with that, the cocky Original Hybrid strolled right out of my apartment, leaving me slack-jawed and turned on.