*WARNING: This chapter is PG-13 due to some violence and disturbing scenes. Readers strongly cautioned.

**Please read the author's note at the end to understand the context of the story, Islam and muslim women. I will be talking about Hijab and Niqab (face covering veil).

Dedicated to my sister from the land down under for always listening to me and her encouragement.

Babe, thanks for having iman in me like I have iman in you. I love you for the sake of Allah

Chapter Ten: Compromised (Part Two)

"Aren't you coming to bed?" At the tone of her husband, Aminah lifted her gaze from the book she was holding and searched for him, finding him standing at the doorway of their bedroom, looking at her.

Instead of answering, she looked to the round clock hanging on the wall and then at the door, Hassan's gaze trailing after hers. It was ten-thirty; the time when their daughter usually comes home from the surau. Except for the occasional passing breeze and the whooshing of the trees, the night was still.

"She will be home soon," he commented, moving closer to her as though having read her mind. "Zainab's walking her home, remember?"

He placed a hand on her shoulder. "You don't have to wait up. You aren't well yourself."

As he said this, she raised one fist to her mouth, coughing into it, pain rippling through her lungs. She rubbed a hand over her chest when her cough had subsided. She set the book down just as his hand left her shoulder and watched him move to the door. "I'll just leave the porch lights on," Hassan said, flipping the light switch.

That still didn't manage to tame the unease that resided in her heart.

"We should head to bed," he said, already walking to their bed chamber. "We have another long day tomorrow."

Rising to her feet, Aminah spoke the contents of her heart, "Bang, my heart... doesn't feel good."

Hassan turned to look at his wife. She added, " I have had this feeling since morning. I feel like...I feel like something bad is going to happen."

He studied her face for a moment before saying, "You've probably overworked yourself. Don't be so paranoid. Go rub on some axe oil and perform wudhu before going to sleep. InsyaAllah, it's nothing. "

Protests hung off her tongue, but she let it slide.

Her husband was probably right. She blew out a sigh, relaxing her tense shoulders and rubbing the back of her neck - deciding it best to loosen up a bit. She often worried at the slightest things and would grow anxious if anything was out of place for she was used to routine. If a task was unfinished, she would go to bed late just to finish it even if held little to no importance as she couldn't stand leaving work piling and liked to stay on schedule and be prepared. Her concern had warranted a toll on her health on several occasions, making her husband and children protesting against the stringent rules she lived by. Perhaps that was why she often felt like she was thirteen years older her actual age when she was only thirty seven.

Deciding to heed his advice, she headed inside, leaving Hassan to switch off the remaining lights.

***

"H-Harun," Nadiah stammered, swallowing sharply. Harun is here. Here... with me. Alone. What is he doing here? Questions raced through her mind, her natural instincts sending warning vibes while she could hear her mother's voice echoing in her ears.

"Tak manis seorang perempuan berdua-duaan dengan seorang lelaki yang bukan muhrimnya (It is not fitting for a woman to be alone with a man who is not her husband)"

She could vaguely envision the day when her mother told her that. It was after lunchtime on a warm afternoon and they were cleaning the kitchen together, Aminah was washing the dishes while she wiped them dry.

Tumbling back to reality, Nadiah knew there was one thing she should do: escape. And fast.

She couldn't risk to be seen. If word got out, she was dead. It would be scandalous.

She shouldn't even be there.

Ya Rabb (Dear Lord), I didn't mean to be out here...with a man alone. Please, forgive me and help this servant of Yours. Ameen Ya Rabbal alamin...She supplicated a prayer silently. Calm down, Nadiah. She maintained a straight face and tried to remain collected. Just say a few greetings and get out of here.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, breaking the ice while trying to sound casual. Though the only thing she was interested in was to escape. She wasn't sure whether she wanted to find out his answer.

He drew closer, smiling and baring his full set of teeth which made goose bumps trace up her skin.

"Nothing. I'm just taking a walk. It's such a lovely night, don't you think?" Then he laughed - making her flinch slightly. There was something different about his laughter.

Ya Allah, this man was getting even more weird by the minute.

Joining him, she laughed nervously - even though she did not know what the joke was. The laughter faded to a silence, making her shift a little from the awkwardness. The wind chose that moment to breeze through the forest, rustling the leaves of the trees around them. It was then that the hood of her scarf fell to her shoulders, leaving her hair exposed.

Gasping, Nadiah hastily reached up to pull the scarf around her head once more when he spoke words that made her blood froze.

"You know...you look prettier with your hair. Just like an angel...an angel from heaven."

"Harun...what nonsense are you spewing now?" she said, clutching her scarf tightly together, furious and offended by his remark. Instead of answering, his gaze left her face and trailed down, roaming her body and though she was fully dressed, she felt violated.

"Why are you looking at me like that! It's not proper for you to do so."

Her heart stopped when she saw the darkened look in his eyes. Just like a lion's preying on its prey: cold and ravenous.

"You're very pretty, Nadiah..." he slurred, sauntering forward into her personal space.

Startled, she stumbled backward, nearly tripping over the vines that crawled on the ground.

"S-s-stop spewing nonsense!" she warned, her voice shaking. "Y-you better get lost or I'll scream for my life. " Ignoring her threats, he continued forward.

"I'm warning you," she threatened, hating how his gaze swept over her body lustfully. It felt as though she was naked. "Don't you know it isn't proper for a man and woman who are not muhrims (spouses) to be together especially in the middle of the night."

"Precisely," he replied, a sneer tugging at his lips. "If you scream, they will discover us and make you marry me."

Her stomach fluttered with a wave of nausea as realisation came dawning upon her to the meaning behind his sentence.

Her mother's words resounded in her ears again, bringing her back to that day in the kitchen.

"In a hadith (recorded narrations)," Aminah had said while passing her a plate. " Prophet Muhammad (saw) said, “If a man and a woman are alone together in an isolated place, then the third is Shaitan. (Satan)"

Her breathing halted when her back hit something hard.

The bark of a tree trunk. She was trapped!

Harun took a step forward, a sheen of moonlight illuminating half of his face. His next words made her stiff. "You should have accepted when I proposed to you nicely..."

Seizing her arms and ripping her scarf off, Harun dragged her towards him. Screaming and resisting with all her might, Nadiah hastily jammed her right foot into his left shin as hard as she could. Releasing her wrists, he grabbed his shin and hobbled on one foot while hurling curses at her.

She bolted into a run, weaving her way around the uneven ground as quickly as her legs could carry her.

"You're going to pay for that!" he hollered after her, his face a fiery red.

With her heart pounding in her ears, Nadiah raced through the woods, not entirely sure which direction was home. She had dropped her flashlight when Harun wrapped his hands on her wrists earlier and didn't stop to pick it up before fleeing.

There was no time to think, just run.

"H-help!" she gasped bewilderedly at the darkness around her with tears already forming, hoping someone would come. "Somebody, help me!"

O Allah, she supplicated earnestly in her heart. Yaa hayuu yaa qayyuum (u), birahmatika astagheeth. Ameen Ya Rabbal alamin. (O You! the Alive, the Eternal! By Your Mercy, I am pleading for rescue.)

Her heart hammered even louder against her ribcage when she heard twigs and branches snapping - an indication that he was hot on her trail. Glancing over her shoulder, she saw him charging. Her foot suddenly caught hold of a vine, causing her to trip and slam onto the hard soil, sticks and stones piercing into her palms as her head throbbed against the hard impact.

"I have you now." She heard him say, his tone so sinister that she was sure that there was a wicked smile attached to his lips.

Pulling her body backwards, she caught the dangerous look in his eyes as he drew closer. She pushed herself back with her hands and feet, uncaring of the sticks that cut into her skin, in an attempt to force a space between them.

"H-harun," she begged as her whole body trembled, tears rolling down her cheeks. "P-please, don't do this. "

"You made me do this," He replied, coming to a stop such that he now hovered above her."If I can't have you, no one else can," he added, eyeing her hungrily from head to toe, his gaze lingering on her chest. Looking down, she realised that the button of her top was missing, exposing her neck and a little of her collar bone. She clutched it, instantly feeling dirty. Her limbs seemed to be paralysed when he stooped down, leaning in. She squeezed her eyes, another tear escaping and waited for his weight to press on her while wishing for death.

"Do not touch her!" A familiar voice shattered the air.

Nadiah's eyes flew open and saw someone ripping Harun off and delivering a punch to his jaw. She sat up and blinked twice, clearing her blurred vision. Her heart constricted when she saw that the man was Maa'rof.

Harun stumbled, regained his stance and charged at Maa'rof with a snarl, thrusting him onto the grass and tackled him, swinging a left hook at his jaw.

"Abang!" Nadiah cried, a scream emancipating from her throat upon seeing the heated brawl.

"This is what you get for messing around!" Harun yelled, gearing up for another punch but this time Maa'rof blocked his attack with an arm, pushing him such that they both rolled over and that he was now on top. They continued wrestling on the ground and it warranted Nadiah's concern for she feared for Maa'rof's safety.

"Stop! Harun stop! Stop hitting him!" Nadiah pleaded, desperate to have them stop. The thought of bruises lining Maa'rof's face pained her.

Gathering his strength, Harun pushed Maa'rof off. He scrambled to his feet at the same time Maa'rof did. Maa'rof wiped the trickle of blood from his lips while staring firmly at Harun. They both bundled their hands into fists while encircling each other, keeping their stares intent.

Nadiah's breath caught in her throat as she watched them. Harun swung right but Maa'rof successfully dodged the hit and the subsequent ones after.

"Why you..." Harun said, swinging his fist again but this time Maa'rof swiftly took hold of his arms and threw him back on the ground.

With sweat dripping from his face and breathing heavily, Harun spat at the grass. He pushed himself up, his limbs whining in pain from the punches. He wondered how Maa'rof could still remain energetic and stand tall despite the continuous strikes when he felt like collapsing.

"I can fight all night," Maa'rof said as though having read his mind. "Bring it on, if that's what you insist!"

Knowing that he could not defeat him, Harun leapt to his feet and scampered as quickly as he could, dragging his limp body along.

Lowering his fists, Maa'rof went back to the grass and lifted his sarong which had fallen off when Harun jumped on him earlier. He patted the dirt from it and draped it around his neck once more.

Meanwhile, Nadiah had managed to rise to a stand though her knees shook uncontrollably while still clutching her collars. Even though Maa'rof had saved her from being raped and she remained chaste, she felt dirty especially when she thought of how he had laid his hands on her wrists and stood so closely to her such that she could smell him. The way he was so close to kissing her...Dear God, she loathed that feeling.

And how he had seen her hair...She instantly felt her head, feeling hair instead. She had momentarily forgotten that Harun had pulled her scarf off and was left without a scarf, and still without one now...in the presence of another non-mahram (blood relative) male.

Twice that night, a wave of nausea washed over her. It was painful enough for her to be out here with a man alone and even more painful to have her awrah (intimate body parts) exposed.

Maa'rof turned to face her at the same time she looked towards him. Their eyes met briefly before he quickly turned his body completely, refusing her another glance. Silence engulfed them once again and Nadiah felt as though she had been slapped.

Tears began welling in her eyes again. She knew what he was thinking: she was no longer chaste or she was dirty in his eyes. What woman would be out without a scarf?

In her mind, she recalled the day when her mother first told her to start putting a scarf on three years ago, at the age of twelve just a few months after Maa'rof left for Malacca. Even though she had not reached puberty yet at that point of time - and therefore was not yet a woman - she complied and had never allowed any man to see her without it ever since.

Nadiah began to lose it, her voice breaking in sobs. She felt ashamed. Every fibre in her body felt sinful. She repeated the istighfar in her head continuously - begging God to forgive her for sinning - even though it was unintentional.

Maa'rof stayed silent for a few minutes, letting her cry while still keeping his body turned.

"I'll walk you home," he finally spoke when she had ceased crying, his voice distant. "Here." She looked down and saw his sarong in his outstretched hand.

***

Kamal pulled back a branch, taking extra care to be as noiseless as possible as he peered at the couple approaching the house and strained his ears to listen to the ongoing conversation. But all he could hear were murmurs. Earlier he had been walking along the dark woods on his way home when he overheard voices. Curious, he followed the source and made out two people in the distance. Creeping closer, his eyes widened when he saw it was Maa'rof - the son of the respectable Haji Ali. But that was not all, he was with a female - Hassan's daughter at that. Nadiah was crying and clutching the collars of her top tightly.

"Here. You don't have to worry, " Maa'rof had said to Nadiah, shrugging off the sarong from his neck and offering it to her. "No one will know. I will make sure of it."

Kamal then saw Nadiah nodding her head bitterly as she accepted the garment and covered herself with it. He could not believe his eyes and ears upon what he had seen and heard. He went to trail after them, taking caution not to let himself be discovered. The longer he looked at them, the more sure he was of what he believed had happened. Satisfied with the evidence, he released the branch and turned on his heel, leaving the premises discreetly just as he had came.

***

Aminah blinked, suddenly finding herself by a pristine lake. She had no prior recollection of how she had gotten there in the first place but when she glanced to the right, she saw her husband casting a line into the waters and moving on to lay out the other fishing nets. Metres away in front of her, her young daughters: Normah, Nadrah and Nadiah sat together at the edge of the lake, giggling as they splashed water at each other, each of their clothing were thoroughly soaked. It felt right for her then but she had an inquisitive voice nagging at her at the back of her mind. She had no answer as to what it was. She studied her youngest daughter, Nadiah. Her smile so bright and her laughter so carefree as she played with her sisters that it brought warmth to Aminah's womb. Aminah smiled to herself.

Nadiah was frail and sickly as a child among her children that it warranted her concern. Even now at the tender age of five, Aminah still worried for her due to her small frame and sometimes wondered if she had been getting enough to eat. Giving birth to Nadiah was the most difficult childbirth she had ever went through. Her water bag broke resulting her to go into immediate labour at about two in the morning, the mid wife only arriving at three am. After four gruelling hours of pushing and withstanding the pain, the long awaited child was born. When Zubaidah, the mid wife, realised that the skin and sclera of the new born were yellow, she was alarmed and quickly cleansed the infant's body with warm water.

A weary and physically weak Aminah had inquired what was the child's gender just as a worried Hassan stepped into the room. He cradled the infant, thanked Allah for His blessings and began to recite the Azan in her ears. Aminah was surprised to see Zubaidah retrieving her child back once he was finished, saying that her child had contracted jaundice and therefore needed to be sunbathed.

A loud splash interrupted her daydream. She looked up, her blood went cold at what she saw. The once happy atmosphere was shattered, replaced by her daughters' ear-splitting screams.

Aminah cried, "Astagfirullah! Nadiah! "

Her little girl had fallen into the deep waters.

"Assalamualaikum!" The repeated knocks and greetings shook Aminah out of her slumber, her eyes snapping open. She was no longer at the lake but in the toasty comfort of her bed chamber except, the space next to her was empty, the room door ajar.

She heard the greetings again - only more persistent and louder this time. "Assalamualaikum!" Detecting the urgency, Aminah sprang to her feet, pulling on a scarf. She saw a burst of the living room lights through the ajar door at the same time. Hassan was already standing in front of the door when she came out, his hand on the lock.

"Walaikumsalam..." He answered as he began to unlock the door. She inched closer, wondering who could it be and why she'd suddenly dreamt of the past. Her gaze fell on Nadiah's bed chambers. There was no candle glow or source of light coming from inside.

The front door burst open and Aminah's maternal instincts kicked at the horrific sight before her. Now she knew why she'd dreamt of that incident.

The villager chief's son, Maa'rof was standing right in front of them, his face grim. Nadiah was next to him. But that wasn't what that made her stomach lurch.

Nadiah's clothes were stained, the collar was missing its button, her face tear-streaked and her hair tousled.

Nadiah choked, tears began pooling in her eyes. "M-mak..."

Aminah knew then her nightmare had only started.

***

Author's note: Let me know what you thought! Votes and comments are appreciated!

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