My legs twisted and turned beneath the all too large chair that I seemed to sink into. My hands and fingers itched to start playing the game already. The screen had finished with loading and we laughed as we started our videos.

"All right. I am here with some people. Some are new, Smii7y, and Max. We will learn to get to know each other. Anyway, welcome to another Cookie show and here we will be at it. I mean, getting demonatized. Again. For all of you, complaints about one of my first videos being removed. That wasn't me. I had no hand in that. Apparently, I said a bad thing and so it is down. Twitch looks more and more enticing. Anyway, we are here and it is the way the cookie crumbles." I began the video and the game loaded. I wasn't first to go, thankfully.

"I was promised black. Oh shit. I mean blank but all I got was blank." Tyler had begun to shout but at his mistake we chuckled hard. He was one big mess up. Something that was an odd attraction to him. My mind buzzing into action. I inserted a picture of PewDiePie's subs and then also a picture of my subs. One large difference.

When the cards got revealed laughs filled the call. Anthony really enjoyed mine and I was glad. His laugh was so loud. I was first and so it was the first to be revealed.

"Sad thing is that is my actual sub number. So you laugh but it be true." I wasn't as big as Evan but I wasn't some 200 following that wants to get big. I had passed that stage and I was at the next step of growing and spreading the word.

The round carried on until eventually, the very last pair of cards would be seen. Vanoss hovered over it as we mocked 407 for just his life until we silenced. The cards were all pictures but I stopped in silence. Compete and utter silence. The others laughed and the dude, Smii7y, pretended to get offended. The card would have read as 'I was promised but all I got was '.

"Right. I get you have a picture of my special channel but why do you also have a heavily cropped and edited picture of the dude that I live with?" The others laughed until they also kind of believed me.

"That's Smii7y." I was quiet. Nothing said and soon the others followed me. A few odd questions about what was going on were asked and then I spoke up.

"Right. I am going to turn on my camera. It's up to you if you include this in the video but I am going to get the man I live with. Quick warning. I am in my lazy clothes. My booty shorts and a crop top." I turned on the front facing camera and they all joked about the shock of my face. I had no makeup on and I still had my hair in two buns on my head. A faint sound of a groan left Smii7y's mic.

My legs stretched and I left to the other half of the house. Where Jaren stood and my arms folded. The entire time, I had played with his friends and not him, I knew so little about him it was embarrassing.

"Cookiecutter?" I nodded and hung my head in shame. I lived with a fellow YouTuber for months and had no clue. I took his hand and laced his fingers in mine when we walked into my study. The camera still on and far off shouts were heard. Some of the shouts were even of my name but it all stopped when we walked in.

"Wait." It was Kryoz. He knew too much and so I had to butt in. My interruption was on cue.

"Save it John." He shut up and I sighed. After all that time. Nothing could have made me feel smart. Jaren soon walked away, off to his own study to continue on with his content and I went back to mine.

"So, Smii7y. How be you?" I laughed a little, I had waited for him to return to his study. His laugh filled the call and I hit my head on the desk.

"Fuck it. I won't even edit this video. Add my usual 'Sexy Bitch' by Akon and add my face, or cookie to the start and upload. I mean, I have shown my face now. Why not?" My hands covered my face and the camera was turned off. Hopes of disappearing filled my mind but I forgot all about it. The game had to continue.

"5k blank. Fuck you." Anthony was basically shouting but he held back a little. My mind had set back into action and I played my card.

"5K dislikes. Fuck you. Oh, it's a write in. So good." Anthony could relate to it. We all had the ability to relate to the word.

"Seriously. You could have the happiest and kindest video ever. It could be so pure, like some make a wish video and there are dislikes and you think, but why? They are helping a child, a dying child, to be happy and you are like 'no. If I am sad you must be too. Why are they getting the special treatment? They will be dead in a couple days anyway.' and life is slightly less worth it when I see that." My addition was mocking the platform. A whine and also a squeaky voice was used to mock those who disliked the videos. A real anger was felt for those people. "I watched a video the other day. Some kid had cancer. She was so happy and all she had ever wanted was to ride a horse but as she was ill the chance passed her by. Well, after watching her ride a horse. I liked it and then saw that 1k had disliked it. Why? Because she got to be happy? 'you're dying. Die without being all happy. Leave the joy to those of us who will be able to remember it and tell our future kids about it.' Fuck you." I held my mouse firmly on the desk and suddenly a hand rested on my back. It was Jaren. I jumped and he gave me a joking look. I pushed him off and then he headed off.

"Wow. Someone is passionate. I mean, I can only agree but still. I get it and you can have your point and win the fucking game." My smile was wide but not a soul would ever be aware of it as I stayed hidden still. The video was stopped and the editing began. Very little was done. The part where I collected Jaren was placed over the recording of all the cards and a cookie was added. Alongside the song by Akon.

The likes and dislikes piled in as I waited to see what may become of it. Most people had seemed to be surprised by what I looked like and questions sparked because of it. One in particular caught my attention.

In his defence he had told people that I was not as everyone thought. So many pictures of me were made. Almost all of them made me out to be white. I wasn't though.