Summary: When Hvitserk returns from a raid, he brings back more than his usual treasures. His wife faces a dilemma, a huge choice that could shape their future forever.

Characters: Hvitserk Ragnarsson x Reader, mentions of Ubbe, Ivar and Harald

Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name

Warnings: Angst, cheating, swearing, jealousy, mention of polygamy

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Standing at the docks had become somewhat of a yearly routine for me. Hvitserk always took the opportunity to go raiding, being the true Viking man he was; he would never turn down the opportunity, and I always encouraged these actions, knowing that it was in his nature to venture off and explore the world. Of course it got lonely, how could it not when almost everyone you knew sailed away to foreign lands no one knew about? I often worried before and during these raids about him, praying to all the Gods that everyone returned safe, especially my Hvitserk. He was a wild man, loving the thrill of adrenaline, which sometimes made me sick with worry. But I knew my husband, and I could see how much he loved exploring.

The ships were finally here, all who had remained in Kattegat gathered along the shore and docks, waiting for what seemed like a whole day. Men and women piled off the vessels, some immediately running to their loved ones whilst others hauled off the treasures they had found. Peering over everyone's heads, I was somehow caught off guard by Hvitserk, who launched himself at me out of no where, his arms tightly gripping onto my body. I had no chance to get my words out as he started kissing me, deeply at first before peppering my entire face with smaller, shorter kisses as I laughed.

"I don't know why I keep leaving you, it's too much to bear." Hvitserk breathed out, pulling our faces closer together.

My hands held onto his."I'll remind you that you said that before the next raid."

"Were you lonely?"

"Always." I teased, though he seemed to think I was serious. I smiled."Come on, we need to get home, I need to see how much you really missed me."

After our blissful reunion, we laid in our bed holding onto each other as Hvitserk began reciting his tales from the raid. I watched in admiration, loving the way he spoke with such passion. We had only raided twice together, but after thinking I was pregnant I stopped, unfortunately being wrong multiple times. The seer prophesied that Hvitserk and I would indeed have children, confusing us with riddles about the right time and place; we practically had sex everywhere in Kattegat at almost any time. Were we just being impatient?

Like all raids, a huge feast was held in honour of the men and women who raided, celebrating their safe return along with the riches they brought back with them. Dressed as a prince and his princess should, I playfully scolded Hvitserk as he kept grabbing at me, not afraid to show affection in public. I was in the middle of teasing him by denying his kisses when we were suddenly interrupted by a shield maiden.

"Excuse me prince Hvitserk, princess (Y/N)," she bowed her head in respect,"I do not mean to intrude."

I smirked at Hvitserk before looking at her."No, don't worry. What can we do for you?"

"I was just going to congratulate the prince on this successful raid. He was very brave throughout it."

"Thank you Siv. I too saw how you fought, no one could miss it."

My smirk fell, turning into a frown."Oh, you two know each other?"

Yes, you could say we became good friends during the journey before exploring the land together, she had my back, and I hers."

They were staring at each other, lust filling their eyes. The pair seemed to forget that I was there. I saw how his eyes raked over her well built body, her toned arms making the dress fit tighter around her, she had a tall stance that made her seem more regal than she actually was.

I cleared my throat."Well Siv, thank you for protecting my husband, I am thankful he had someone to keep his head on straight whilst I wasn't there."

"It was a pleasure princess. I'd do anything for Hvitserk."

I didn't like it when she said his name."He is your prince, I would expect you, as well as everyone else, to do that."

"(Y/N), relax, we are here to celebrate. Here, have a drink with us Siv."

"I will join you in just a minute my prince. I promised a friend a dance."

She sauntered away, I could see that she was swaying her hips on purpose, drawing Hvitserk in. He didn't even look away when she started dancing. My grip tightened around my cup, feeling myself becoming angrier as he became distracted by her. My hand covered his, leaning in to whisper close to his ear.

"Are you ready to go? I think I need another reminder of how much you missed me."

"Not yet (Y/N), we haven't even finished eating yet." he dismissed me, not even making eye contact.

I huffed, shoving his hand away as I slumped back in my seat. That caught his attention for a slight second, looking confused before watching his new whore. Hvitserk was very much a lover, everyone knew that he hadn't had long lasting relationships before me; but seeing the way he changed around her, it made me question his loyalty. It wasn't odd for viking men to sleep with other women, but that didn't mean it hurt any less. When Hvitserk first tried to court me, I had told him of my doubts, though he had promised that he would never lay eyes on any other woman but me; and he had been true to his word, throughout our courtship right up to our marriage and so on. This was the first time I had questioned him. I still didn't know if he had fucked her, though they seemed awfully lustful to be just 'friends'.

The rest of my night was spent drinking and dancing with my friends. I couldn't help but be upset, especially since I hadn't seen Hvitserk for months. Now he was suddenly all over another woman; was he bored of me?!

The night dragged on, more and more thoughts of Hvitserk's secret love affair distracting me from the celebration. He wouldn't, would he? Was I not enough for him anymore? Was it because I couldn't bare him a child?

"Hvitserk, I want to go home." I demanded, not caring that I was interrupting his conversation.

"Soon (Y/N), soon." he slurred, pulling me onto his lap.

Although I wanted to leave, I stayed in his embrace, wanting to remember the way it felt to be held by him. Right now it seemed like this was the most affection I would get throughout the night; if he didn't even want a quick fuck when we got home, then there was definitely something wrong. I let him speak to his friends for another half hour, tiring of their boasting after just five minutes. Hvitserk was being handsy with me, as usual not caring about what others around us saw. Ever so subtlety, I began to move my arse around on his crotch, pretending to find a better position. His hand tightened on my hip, setting down his cup as I felt him become aroused beneath me.

"You're asking for it when we get home." he hissed in my ear.

"Then why don't we get it over with?" I quickly remarked, looking at him over my shoulder.

He snarled slightly, almost knocking me to the ground as he abruptly stood up. Without saying goodbye to anyone, he took my hand and dragged me out the hall, thinking that he was getting lucky tonight. My enthusiasm disappeared as we burst through the door of our home, immediately pushing him off me as he tried to undress me.

"Hvitserk, why were you staring at Siv all night?!" I snapped, wanting to find out the truth before I could get hurt anymore.

"What do you mean? Why are you talking about her now?" he joked, trying to lean in for a kiss, but I quickly shoved him away.

"I saw the way you looked at her, I know that look!"

He sighed, realising that I wasn't going to let it go."Siv and I became close on the raid."

"What do you mean by 'close'?" I crossed my arms over one another, wondering if I was about to know everything I had been dreading.

"(Y/N) you always say how lonely you are when I raid, that you wish you had something to look after." he approached me slowly, gently placing his hands on my stomach.

"What's your point?" my voice was quieter, though still stern.

"Siv wants a family too! She no longer wants to raid, says that she feels like the gods have destined her for motherhood instead. What if, we extended our family?"

He was smiling, thinking that he had worded it beautifully, that I would fall for his charm and let that....woman into our home. I glared at him, my mouth turning up in disgust at the thought of sharing my husband.

"Do you honestly think I would share me husband with anyone? That I would let myself roll over as he fucked his newest bride? Forget about me and let me rot in the corner whilst he bedded all the women in Kattegat?"

Hvitserk looked scared, and he had every right to be.

"Am I not enough for you anymore? Scared that you won't like what you see once I'm with child? That you won't be able to get a good fuck every week."

"Why do you think that's all I want to do?" he sighed, gripping onto the roots of his hair in frustration.

"What do you see in her?"

"What?" his hands flopped to his sides.

"What do you see in her? What is it that she has that I don't?"

"(Y/N) I could never compare you-"

"You're such a hypocrite! If you want to be with someone else then there is obviously something differently interesting about them compared to the one you're with now; which by the way, if you had forgotten, it's me!"

"Many men do this."

"That doesn't make it right! Plus, you vowed that you would never do such a thing to me, nor I to you when I agreed to marry you, remember that?"

"But I want this for us! I believe that we could be happy with her."

"You could be happy with her." I sighed."Tell me the truth Hvitserk, when we were newly married, did you ever think about bringing another woman into the relationship?"

His hesitation was all I needed. Tilting my head back to stop the tears, I took a deep breath in as I turned away, ashamed and embarrassed. I was starting to question my marriage, something I never thought or wanted to be doing.

"Do you love her?" I quietly asked, afraid of the answer.

"What?"

"Do you love-"

"I heard what you said!" he snapped."No, I don't. Are you happy now?"

"Hvitserk, that just makes it worse!" I yelled, appalled by his behaviour.

"What do you want me to say?! It's the truth!"

"That just proves you want to fuck someone else rather than me! How can you not hear what you're saying?"

"(Y/N), it's not like that-"

"By the gods, what has happened to you? Just leave."

"It's my house-"

I picked up my skirts, shoving past him."Then I'll leave-"

"(Y/N), you will not leave this house." Hvitserk demanded, blocking me from the front door.

"Fine." I spun on my heel, walking towards our room. I was fuming at him."But don't come near me or even look at me."

"(Y/N), you're overeating."

I halted in my steps, turning around to shout, but abruptly stopped myself; I didn't want to get into it anymore, knowing that I would cause myself more misery. Forcing myself to ignore him, I slammed the door behind me, hoping he would leave me alone.

The entire night Hvitserk tried to hold me, or at least lay nearer to me. And although it pained me to reject his love (despite desperately wanting affirmation that it was still there), I pushed him away, gripping to the furs as I pretended not to cry. I had never looked at another man ever since falling for him, yet here he was, casually asking if he could marry another just for a difference in his sex life. Fury, jealousy, pain and insecurity filled my entire being, my mind spinning so fast that I thought I would throw up. Neither of us gained any sleep that night, dreading the thought of waking up beside each other.

As soon as light broke through the night sky, I got dressed as quickly as I could, thankful that Hvitserk was exhausted after the raid. I wasn't one tor un away from an argument, however I couldn't face the thought of having my self esteem lowered any more than it already was. As I reached further into the town, I was stared at by the tradesmen setting up their stalls for the day, awaiting many customers, though not expecting a princess to speedily walk by.

"Princess!" I heard Siv call, making my hands turn into tight fists.

"Yes?" I answered with a foul face.

She wasn't stupid, she knew that I was angry and why."Oh, I was just wondering...well, that is, if you and the prince-"

"You're wondering whether he asked me to sit aside whilst he took you as his second wife, hm? You're wondering whether I'll have you killed for even thinking about bedding my husband."

Her eyes widened."P-princess-"

"Hvitserk told me how you got close. I don't know how you could even think about sleeping with another woman's husband."

"Th-they're my feelings, I can't help it."

"And somehow you forgot that I too have feelings! My husband has been away from me for months, doing gods know what, but when I finally get him back, he now seems to think that I would be content with him having another wife. Do you now how it feels to have this pain, like a part of your body has been ripped away and you don't know whether that piece will ever return?!"

I was panting after my rant, watching as Siv lowered her head."No, I don't-"

"Exactly. Obviously I cannot make the decision fully, but know this; if he makes you his new bride, I will not make life easy for you."

I hadn't threatened many people, and it was only in dire situations that I did so, but it had felt so good. Siv was a shield maiden, unafraid of anything, until I came along; nothing is scarier than a pissed off wife.

Leaving her swiftly, I didn't plan a specific route, finding myself weaving a very confusing path through Kattegat. A group of children rushed by me, full of energy as they started their day by playing together. How I wished to be that age again, not having to care about anything.

Suddenly my mind flashed back to what the Seer had told us. We would have children at the right time and place; did he mean that Siv would bare the children for us? Were the gods giving Hvitserk another woman because I couldn't perform such a common task like most women?! It was mortifying, having to get another woman to provide children was the lowest things I had heard of. I would be no part of the child's life, it wouldn't even be mine.

"(Y/N), what are you doing out here so early?" Ubbe broke me out of my thoughts, causing more embarrassment as he saw me crying.

"Ubbe, you shared Margrethe with Hvitserk."

"(Y/N), what's wrong?"

"Why did you do that?"

His brow furrowed in deep confusion, approaching me slowly as if I were a mad woman. Perhaps I was now.

"It didn't seem fair that I claimed her when she obviously loved us both. I wasn't going to be selfish."

"Do you think I'm being selfish?"

"You are not making sense right now."

"Hvitserk wants Siv as a second wife. But after confronting him about it, I believe he only wants a change of woman to bed. It seems that I am too boring now."

"Have you two spoke of this? Properly?"

I shook my head."Only argued. There was a lot of shouting."

"(Y/N), my brother still loves you."

"It surely doesn't feel that way. I feel stupid, ugly even. It's making me second guess everything he's ever done."

"You need to speak with him."

"I feel like I'm not getting through to him though. He doesn't understand how I feel about it. And I worry that maybe this is the fate I'm destined for."

"You think too much into these things."

"The Seer, he prophesied-"

"No one ever figured those things out until it is too late."

"That didn't make it any better."

"And why can't Hvitserk have another woman? Perhaps it will be good for you, both of you."

"Ubbe, if Margrethe were to bring back a man and ask for him to be her second husband, would you let her?"

He remained quiet, wanting to speak back but he had no good argument.

"You only allowed your brother to fuck her because you knew him, you knew he wouldn't push any boundaries and you had control of the situation. The terms are always different for women."

"What do you want me to suggest (Y/N), hm?"

"I...." I sighed."I don't know."

"Speak to my brother. This is your problem."

"Wow, thank you for such a good talk Ubbe."

Stomping away from him, I felt slightly bad for snapping at him, it really wasn't his fault, but I had to let my rage out somehow. There was no way I could speak to Hvitserk now, I was too angry and it would take a while for me to calm down. Not sure what to do next, I took to wandering around Kattegat, thinking of my arguments against Hvitserk and how we were going to face each other later.

"(Y/N)!" someone called me for the third time that day.

"Ivar, don't you know it's rude to shout at a lady?" I said as I walked towards him. He was on his crutches, leaving the Great Hall with king Harold.

"Of course I do. But there aren't any ladies around to shout at."

I crossed my arms over my chest, not really knowing why I had been beckoned over so easily; Ivar and Hvitserk were drifting apart nowadays, so were the rest of the brothers, but anyone could see why. Ivar was becoming malicious, cruel and infuriating.

"What do you want Ivar? I'm sorry king Harold but I cannot be arsed with my brother-in-law's antics today."

"King Harold and I were just speaking of another raid."

"One so soon?"

"There is still so much of the world we can conquer, places to see and fortunes to be found. I want to find them all before I go to Valhalla." Harold beamed.

Ivar spoke,"And I think you should come. It has been a while since you raided."

"And why's that?"

"The only reason you stopped was so that you could bare the child you thought you were having. Since that hasn't happened after all this time, you might as well join us."

I pretended that his words didn't sting, though he had a point. I stopped all of this for Hvitserk and I, for our possible child. Time after time we were wrong, we were always disappointed. Why should I hold back from something I loved, especially since Hvitserk was having all the fun?! He was gallivanting off to these new worlds, bringing back all the glory. Although I desperately wanted a child, and to have the pregnancy as well as give birth in the safety of my own home, I had a feeling that the Gods had other plans for me. Was I supposed to go back to raiding whilst Siv provided the children? What a horrible twist of fate.

"(Y/N)," Ivar brought me out of me thoughts,"I know you and Hvitserk have not seen eye to eye recently. Especially since his little toy came back with him."

I scowled at him, hating that he was right about most of this.