"If you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be?" Shawn and I were outside on Shawn's rooftop, laying on a red and white checkered picnic blanket as we gazed up at the starry night.

I continued to look at the stars as my hand rested on the soft cotton fabric of his dark blue hoodie. "Hmm. I don't know? Maybe the Philippines? Most of my family is from there and I've heard it's gorgeous over there"

"It definitely is. Especially the beaches during sunset. I should take you one day"

I moved my head up to look at him. "That'd be nice. I'd be able to help you read signs and understand people and stuff"

"You can speak the Philippine language?"

"Tagalog?" I shook my head. "I actually can't speak it but I can understand it fluently"

Shawn gave me a look of confusion. "How does that work?"

"I honestly don't know. I've been exposed to the language since I was a baby but was never forced to speak it"

"Interesting" He nodded his head. "I feel like I learn more about you everyday" He put his index finger under my chin, lifting up my head so he could place a kiss on my lips. I smiled, pulling away.

"So" I said. "What about you? Where in the world would you go?"

"That's a very difficult question since I have been to many places but I would love to visit Amsterdam again"

I snorted at his answer. "What?"He asked, his lips curling at the ends.

"You've already been to Amsterdam, silly goose"

His smile widened at the nickname. "Silly goose, eh?"

I nodded my head then booped his nose. "You are a silly goose" I put my head back on his chest, looking back up at the sky, and felt Shawn place a kiss at the top of my head.

I was going to miss moments like these. Although Shawn and I were back together and everything was back to normal, I have decided that I wanted to finish college early since I ended up becoming ahead thanks to the online classes. In order to finish though, I had to go to the university to do some required labs and whatnot.

Shawn on the other hand, was going on his second summer festival run. Which means that him and I were going to be spending some time apart, two months at most. It was going to be a rough couple of months without each other but I know it's going to be okay, it always is.

————————

A month and a half later..

"Guess what?!" I said, excitedly to the speaker of my phone, jumping around my room.

"What?" Shawn's voice, chuckling, engulfed my room since I had the call on speaker.

"I, Alana Sinclair, have met all of the requirements to join my peers to graduate and receive my degree alongside walking the stage in the full cap and gown ensemble on June 27th"

"Congratulations, honey! I'm so proud of you! When's the graduation again?"

"June 27th"

There was a short pause on the other line. "You have a performance on that day, don't you?"

"I'm sorry honey. You know I'd love to go"

"It's alright" I said, frowning. "On the bright side, I'll be able to see you soon"

I couldn't see him but by the sound of his voice, he was smiling. "I'll make it up to you, I promise"

——————

My face was close to the mirror as I applied a couple of swipes of mascara to my eyelashes. "Are you ready to go, Alana?" Elle asked, leaning against the door of my bathroom in a white and red floral dress and a jean jacket. I, on the other hand, am wearing a blush pink dress that went to my knees and had shades of blue and purple on the part below my waist. I had this dress personally made to look like Shawn's newest album cover to help make me feel as if he were here with me.

I put the wand back into the tube. "Mhm"

A couple of hours later and I was sitting in a chair, wearing my black cap and gown, along with the rest of the graduating class. The row of people I was sitting with got up to go next to the stage so I followed the line, going up the stage steps.

Three people later, I heard my name being called. "Alana Sinclair" I walked across the stage, shaking hands with people who I didn't know. I got to the middle of the stage and received my diploma, smiling towards the cameras that my family had pointed towards me.

The flashes of the camera picked at my eyes and I looked away from them, towards the back of the room before I could turn blind. And that's when I saw him. His tall figure, curly brown hair. Shawn. Another flash hit my eyes and then he was gone. I walked down the stage and back to my seat.

----------

I sat at the dinner table with Elle, my parents, Layla, Elena, and her husband, Josh. I was consuming some steak with potatoes and corn.

"We are so proud of you honey" My mom said, boasting at me. I smiled back at her.

"Thank you, mom. I wouldn't have been able to do it if it weren't for all of you"

"So" Josh spoke up after swallowing his steak. 'Where's that handsome boyfriend of yours?"

Elena looked at him, giving him a face of bewilderment. Josh looked back at her, his eyebrows standing up. "What? You can't lie. The boy's gorgeous"

I chuckled at that as did everyone else at the table. "Sadly, he's on his summer festival run" I said, responding to Josh's question.

We continued to eat and had small conversations here and there until the sound of the doorbell ringing disrupted all the conversations. My dad quickly stood up from his seat. "I'll get that" We all watched as he ran towards the door. About a minute later, he comes back with a large white box that looked like a package. He walked over to me, replacing the plate in front of me with the box.

"Thanks dad?" I said confused, then proceeded to open the box. Inside the box was yet another box but this time, it was a pink box with Shawn's name on the top left corner and the name of his newest song, 'If I Can't Have You' on the bottom right. I smiled warmly at the box, already knowing what was inside due to all the videos that I've seen of people opening the one's they've received.

Elle spoke up as I continued to admire the box. "Are you going to open it or what?"

"Jeez. Patience, young one." I put my hands on the sides of the lid and lifted it up. I took off the layer of paper on the top and looked at the contents. On the right side of the box was a cassette containing the new song and to the left was a huge cassette player.

Everyone looked at the box, admiring it along with me. I took out the stuff from the box, placing the cassette into the player and pressed play. "Alana. Honey" Shawn's voice came out of the speaker and I was shocked to see that it wasn't the song, but a personal message.

"I love you so so much and I know that you know that because I say it to you every single day. I hate that I'm missing your graduation but here's a gift to take the place of me. I'll see you very soon, gorgeous. I love you, I love you, I love youuuu. Oh. The song's on the other side if you were wondering" The tape stopped and I was left with tears building up in my eyes. Everyone looked at me sympathetically.

"Are you alright, Auntie Alana?" Layla said, coming up to me and tugging on my dress.

"Mhm" I smiled at her, then picked her up. "Do you want to listen to Uncle Shawn's new song?"

She nodded her head excitedly and I turned the tape to the other side, pressing play once again. "I can't write one song that's not about you"

Once the song was over and I put Layla down so she could go with her mom to the bathroom, Elle walked up to me. "Hey. You should call Shawn and tell him thanks" She said this in a tone that sounded sort of off.

"Alright" I picked up my phone from the dining room table, dialing Shawn's number. "Hi, love"

"Hi, honey" He said in a way where you could tell that he was smiling.

"Thank you for the package. I love it"

"Yeah, of course! By the way, you look stunning in that dress"

"Awww. Thanks, love" There was a long silence on the other end. "Love?"

"You didn't catch it, did you?" He chuckled quietly to himself.

"Catch what?"

"How could I possibly know what you're wearing right now if I haven't seen you?" I could hear a change in the audio as his voice seemed to get louder.

"You're behind me, aren't you" I said, afraid to look back.

A pair of large hands covered my eyes as I felt the tickle of someone's breathe go close to my ear. "Guess who" He whispered.

I bit my lip. "Hmm. Cole Sprouse?"

He put his hands down, placing them on my stomach, hugging me from behind. "You think you're being funny?"

I chuckled, turning around and placing my hands behind his neck, feeling his soft hair beneath my fingertips. "Hi" I smiled widely, leaning in to peck his lips.

"Hi" He smiled back.

"What happened to your show?"

"I'm glad you didn't remember because it allowed for the plan to work. Time zones. The place where I performed was a day ahead"

"Wow. You're a clever one, Mendes"

He stared into my eyes, bringing a hand to my hair, and tucking it behind my ear. "What's on your mind, love?"

"Everything is nothing if I can't have you" He sung to me.

I grinned. "Who is that song about, by the way?"

He scrunched his eyebrows. "Who do you think?"

"Well, to be honest, I think it's about your girlfriend from kindergarten" I said, sarcastically.

"Wow" He played along. "How did you know?"

"I guess it's magic" I shrugged my shoulders, laughing along with him as he put both of his hands on the sides of my face, giving me a passionate kiss. He placed his forehead against mine, whispering. "I missed you so much"

"I missed you more" I whispered back. Shawn put his head up, looking behind me. "Looks like we have an audience over there"

I turned around and watched as Elle, my parents, Elena, and Josh looked at us from the doorframe, then quickly moved away as I stared at them.

-----------

I rested my head on Shawn's bare chest as we laid under my lavender comforters. As I stared up at the ceiling, Shawn brushed his fingers through my hair, placing small kisses to the top of my head. It was quite silent in the room for some time until Shawn spoke up. "I feel like we talk about this every time we see each other, but what's the next step?"

I turned my head so that I was facing him. "The next step?"

"Yeah. What are you planning to do? Are you going to get a job, settle down?"

"Well. I don't know. I honestly haven't thought about it"

"Okay. Because I was thinking that maybe you would want to come with me for the rest of the festival run and then after, when it's over, you'd maybe want to move in with me?"

I looked at him, my heart racing. "You want me to move in with you?"

He grinned at me. "Yeah. I do. Unless you don't want to" He quickly added.

"Woah. This is all happening so fast. Um. I definitely want to go on tour with you, yes. But I just don't know what I want right now. I think I need time to think about it"

Shawn nodded his head. "Of course. Take all the time you need. I love you"

"I love you more" I stared at his features in the dark, placing a kiss on his soft, pink lips. I brought my hand to his cheek, caressing it, then took a deep breath. "I'll move in with you"

Shawn furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "I thought you needed time"

"Honestly. I think it's the right thing to do. Every single time I have to leave you, it breaks my heart. I don't think I can do it anymore"

I thought he was going to say something but he just smiled and placed another kiss on my lips.

-------------

This chapter was lonnggg overdue. I apologize. School has been kicking my butt lately since it's the last month but when summer rolls around, you know I'm going to be writing ALL OF THE TIME.

Have you guys listened to 'If I Can't Have You'? That song has been on repeat for the past couple of days. If you haven't listened, stream it on Spotify, Apple Music, and all that. He also has a live version from SNL yesterday on Youtube!!