"Are you okay?" Louis asked when he saw Zayn standing outside the pet shop with his hands in his jean pockets.

"I think so."

"Well, I have to ask. Asking me to meet you after work is strange. Can't lie and say it doesn't scare me too, cause I feel like it's about me."

"Sorry." Zayn huffed. "I'm not trying to scare you and it's not about you either. Do you think we could go inside the home decor store and talk? I need a hallway rug."

Louis lowered his shoulders in defeat. "Fine. After I go put my things in my car. Wait here."

While Louis put his backpack in the car, Zayn waited for him at the entrance. He couldn't believe he was about to explain to Louis the things that had been happening lately when he didn't even want him to know about Harry just yet. But Louis was the only person he trusted with this sort of new information. And even now, Zayn was terrified he might take it in the wrong way.

"Okay." Louis said and he was out of breath because he came rushing back. "What do you want to talk about?"

Zayn went in through the doors. "About me. I'm in a situation I've never been in before and I need advice."

Louis was shocked that Zayn came to him of all people. What was it that Zayn felt he was equipped enough to handle. "Oh. Well, I'm happy to help. What can I do?"

Zayn tried to be careful in choosing his words in the beginning. "Since I've moved back, I've met someone whom I've come to know as a really good person inside and out. At first, I was just really curious about them because they were so interesting and different. But as I really got to know them, I know that I want something more. Maybe a relationship. The thing is, I'm nervous about saying anything because it's so new."

Louis put his hands behind his back and let a smile play on his face. "Zayn, I'm proud of you. I didn't know you had met someone. That's amazing. What is she like?"

He would've carried on with the "she" pronoun to make it easier on himself but he also would've felt guilty misleading him. "I didn't say it was a girl."

"But is it?"

He took a moment to say it. "No."

Louis stopped what he was doing and quickly pulled him into the nearest aisle. "Well, if it's not a girl, that means it's a boy. Another man. Right?"

He nodded and Louis brought his arms to the front of his body so he could fold them.

"Wow. That's... Something. I never expected you to say that."

"You don't feel different about me, do you?"

"No. Of course not. You can like whoever you want. But... If you're talking about me, I've already told you, I'm not into you like that. I'm into girls and only girls, Zayn."

Zayn rolled his eyes. "It isn't you that I like. It's someone else."

"You're not saying that just because I rejected you, right? Because you did seem pretty offended after that whole Maitea ordeal when I said I wouldn't date you."

He laughed. "Well, a lot of people would date their best friend because it's someone they know and trust, regardless of gender. So yeah, I did wonder why you were so sure. But I assure you I'm not talking about you, Lou. I'm talking about my next door neighbor."

"Next door neighbor. Hmm, that's spicy. How did you actually meet him?"

"When I went outside for a smoke one night. He came out of the house to take out the trash and I was really rude to him."

Louis was confused. "That's what made you like him? Because you were rude?"

"No. I apologized to him the next day. I bought him candles and took them to him."

Louis snickered. "You bought a man candles."

Zayn frowned. "It's not funny, Lou. He's blind. So I tried to get him a gift that he can still be able to enjoy even if he couldn't see it."

Louis wiped the smile off of his face. "Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't know he was blind. So... You talk to him often?"

Zayn reached toward a shelf where there were lanterns of different designs and picked up a plain one made of tin. "I do. He asked me to teach him about colors because he feels like he doesn't know enough about them. So I do that with him some days. But it's not one sided. He's also teaching me how to use my sense of touch to do things I otherwise would never do. You should see how he feeds himself. I'm still waiting for him to show me how he cooks his food."

Louis saw him smiling and it made him smile too. "Well, you definitely know that you like him. But do you know if he likes you back?"

He thought about the day they went to the playground. He couldn't stop thinking about the way Harry was huddled against him the entire time they walked. He could've sworn only people who liked each other did those things but he didn't want to assume anything because it could've been that Harry was just really comfortable with his assistance and stayed close since they were out in public. "I don't know. He's gay. But that never means anything. And I can't read him either." He sat the lantern down in its place and looked at Louis with a look of defeat. "And that's the problem. I don't want to be rejected. I don't want to look like a fool. Not again."

Louis chuckled and pushed his glasses up on his nose. "But how can anyone ever reject you? You're the least prideful guy in the world, you're good looking and you're sort of funny even though everyone knows you're never trying to be. Yes, I know I said I wouldn't date you but that's only because I'm not into that kind of relationship. But the guy you like is and I can't see how he would just knowingly reject you. How could anyone who likes men reject you? It just doesn't make sense."

"Tell that to Heidi."

"Trust me, I wish I could but she's old news now and the difference between her and the guy you like is that he obviously likes you for you and wants you around. She had that opportunity as well, but chose to be a bitch instead." He shrugged but Zayn shook his head.

"Don't call her that. I mean, what she did was wrong but I still loved her."

Louis waved a hand around as he spoke. "Listen, man. It's time to forget about her and move on. But before you completely move forward, the only thing I suggest is you make sure you've spent enough time considering more than just what you feel for him right now. You have no idea what it's like to be sexually intimate with another man. What if you don't like it? What if it makes you uncomfortable? You should really think about that because even if he does like you, you'll hurt him if you realize too late that you don't want to be that intimate with him."

Zayn shook his head at the mere thought of hurting Harry. But Louis was right. Even while he was feeling like this all that time, kissing Harry never came up as a thought, yet alone all the other things that came with being in a relationship. "I get what you're saying. I do. And I don't want to hurt Harry."

"Then I would advise you to spend a little more time with him and really think about what it could mean. See if you really want to be with him, or if you're just simply attracted to the idea."

"And if I do want to be? You say you don't care who I like but what would you think of me if I actually do enter into a relationship with him?"

Louis pulled him closer to him and draped an arm around his shoulders. "You'd still be my best friend. Nothing will change. And besides, if you do, that just means there's more girls left for me."

"How many do you think are out there with a high tolerance for your weird love of rats?"

"Lots of them. I just have to be in the right place."

Zayn smiled apprehensively. "I really do hope you find someone who likes those little creatures as much as you do. I really do."

"Aw. Thanks, Zayn." He said and he playfully pulled Zayn's ear but he did it a bit too hard.

Zayn jerked away and rubbed at his ear. "Ouch! On second thought, I hope Peanut bites you when you get home."

Louis laughed out loud at that. "See what I mean, Zayn? Funny without even meaning to be."

➡➡➡

Zayn had just finished mowing his yard and gone inside for the evening. If it wasn't for the fact that he saw Liam mowing Harry's yard yesterday, he wouldn't have even thought to do it. As a matter of fact, this was something he really didn't want to do and if he hadn't seen Liam, he'd still be going in and out of the house, conveniently choosing not to notice how badly his yard needed to be mowed. And that would not be a good thing because it would mean that he'd be the only house on the block with an unkept yard.

As he'd taken off his shoes and tossed them to the side, his cellphone rang. He retrieved it from his pocket and was surprised to see Harry's name on the caller ID. He quickly answered it. "Hello?"

"Hello, Zayn."

"Hey. What's up?"

"Nothing. I heard your lawnmower cut off about ten minutes ago and I figured you were finally done with mowing your yard for good."

He wiped sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand. "Yeah. I'm finally done. But how did you know it was me?"

"The lawnmower sounded close so I just guessed."

"Ah. Well, you guessed right."

"So... I'm sure you're probably wanting to take a shower."

"Yeah, I was just about to. And then after that, I guess I'll get myself something cold to drink so I can hydrate myself again."

"Right... Well, um. I know you didn't expect me to call, but I wanted to see what your plans were for tonight."

Zayn furrowed his brow. Why did Harry want to know that? "Nothing besides what I just told you. Why?"

"Because I made dinner. More than enough, really. But if you wanted to come by... You could."

"For dinner, you mean?"

"Yes. But only if you want to. You don't have to come because I asked."

Zayn chuckled. "I don't have to. But I do want to. That sounds fun."

"Really?"

"Sure. Why not? I'd just be here at home by myself anyway."

He could hear Harry's excitement through the phone. "Okay. Well, take your shower and come on over. And if you're still wanting something cool and refreshing to drink, I've got fruit punch for us. Okay?"

"Okay. Sounds good. See you in thirty minutes or so."

"Bye, Zayn."

"Bye, Harry."

When Zayn hung up the phone, he quickly rushed to the bathroom for his shower. He was about to eat dinner with Harry and it didn't come on a day when he was teaching him colors or searching for cigarettes? This was just dinner. What was he supposed to do with that?

This might have been the fastest he ever showered, aside from the day he got the call and realized he was bringing a child into the world, so it was apparent that he was very excited about being invited over. But now he was trying to figure out what he should wear.

He was well aware that whatever he wore, Harry couldn't see it. But that didn't matter. It would still be nice to look nice and at least he'd feel good. But he didn't want to be overly dressed either, so he only settled on black jeans and a black button down. Black was mysterious enough and tonight was definitely a mystery. So he could say he was dressed for the occasion.

When he was finished, he spritzed himself with cologne once, snatched up his phone and blindfold and headed out of the door. He would've tracked across the grass this time but freshly cut grass would not look good on his shoes so he changed his mind and took the long way up to Harry's door.

About a minute after he rang the doorbell, Harry's voice came in through the intercom.

"Zayn?"

"Yes. It's me."

The door opened and Zayn saw Harry in the ugliest pink shirt he'd ever seen. There was a huge lion embroidered on the front of it but wherever there was supposed to be the lion's mane, it was loose thread sewn on to imitate fur. He wore some old blue jeans with it and his red sunglasses. Clearly Harry wasn't trying to dress special for him. He didn't know if that was good or bad.

"Come in." Zayn walked in and when Harry heard him walk by, he closed the door and locked it and turned on a nearby light for Zayn. When he got a whiff of Zayn's cologne, he smiled. "Everything is ready, so go wash your hands. Turn on whatever lights you need."

"Um, I brought my blindfold tonight. Do you want me to eat with it on?"

"No, you don't have to. Only if you want to."

Zayn went back to the bathroom and by the time he came out, dinner was on plates and on the table. His fruit punch was in a glass. "Looks delicious."

"Thank you. I hope you enjoy."

"I'm sure I will, as always." Just because he wanted to, he helped Harry sit down in his chair.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"Also, thanks for saying yes to dinner. Sometimes it's nice to eat with someone instead of by myself. Mindy and Liam stayed for dinner yesterday after Liam finished mowing the lawn and it was fun. I wanted to invite you but I didn't know how busy you were. But today I just said oh well, if I never ask, I'll never know."

Zayn nodded. "Well, I'm glad you thought of me. That was really nice of you."

"Of course, Zayn."

Unexpectedly, despite the great start, dinner was actually silent. Zayn felt like it must've been because Harry was really concentrating on eating. But he had talked before through dinner. It didn't make much sense that he was quiet this time around. But he guessed that was okay. At least he got to sit and stare at Harry. And even still, Harry couldn't see how he looked at him. So that was easing to him.

When they were done eating, Harry was back talking again as if eating in silence hadn't been unusual. "Do you have to go home right now?" He asked.

"No. I'm in no hurry. Why?"

"We could listen to a little bit of TV together then. Do you want to?"

Truthfully, Zayn did wonder what it would be like to just listen to the TV. He never just listened to entire episodes or movies before and would love to stay just to try something new. But even more than that, he was eager to spend time with Harry. Besides, wasn't that what Louis told him to do anyway?

"I would not mind doing that at all and for good measure, I'm going to put my blindfold on and experience this with you."

"Oh." Harry said with interest evident in his voice. "Are you trying to impress me?"

"Is it impressive?"

"A little. Considering you nearly die when you have to go searching for cigarettes with that thing on."

Zayn poked his lip out and followed him into the living room, as he put the blindfold on and let it smack against his forehead. "It's frustrating because it takes so long and I don't know what I'm doing or where I'm looking."

"It's supposed to be frustrating. If it was easy, how would you learn to quit? And shouldn't you be able to handle frustration by now? You went to college. I heard that it's nonstop frustration there."

Zayn chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. "Um.. actually... I quit college so.. that's not exactly helping your case."

Harry titled his head sideways but sat down on the floor in front of the couch. "You quit?"

"Yep."

"Why? Was school that hard?"

Zayn drug his way over to Harry and sat down on the floor next to him. "No. It wasn't school that was hard. School was alright. I was just gullible and I ended up embarrassing myself big-time."

"And what's wrong with embarrassment? When is it ever so bad that you need to quit your education?"

"Probably never. But I couldn't take it. I went through the worst heartbreak I could imagine going through."

Harry opened his mouth slowly. He was putting pieces together from their past conversations and figuring out what he could be referring to. "Oh. You mean Heidi, right? The girl you don't like anymore."

"Yeah. Her."

"What happened?"

"Um..."

"Unless you still don't want to tell me, then that's okay."

If Harry had been anyone else, Zayn would've agreed to move on to something else. But Harry had been so sweet about it from the beginning and he was sure Harry really wanted to know why he was so indifferent to romance that night on the phone.

"Okay. I'll tell you. But only because I trust you with it. So that means this isn't something you can share with anyone else."

Harry nodded and Zayn sighed.

"I went up to college three years ago and about a month after I got there, I met Heidi. Right from the start, we hit it off and I could tell she was into me the same way I was into her. It wasn't just her though. She had a couple guy friends that were in her friend group. So we all often hung out and since I had never had a girlfriend before, that allowed me to take my time before getting into the relationship.

"But finally we did start dating and things were going so great for us. I grew to love her and she grew to love me. Then after a year of us dating or so, I started noticing that things between us weren't so great anymore. She was sort of distant. And even her friends who had now become my friends were acting really weird around me. I asked her about it and she said that nothing was wrong and that it was actually me who was acting strange and that they were acting weird because they weren't sure how to act around me.

"I guessed she was probably right because I was missing my family a little bit and plus I was working a lot to pay for my living space whenever I wasn't at school. So I didn't think anything of it. Then one day, I woke up and got a call from Heidi. She was all hysterical in a good way and finally told me she was pregnant."

He could hear Harry gasp but he didn't say anything.

"I remembered us sleeping together without protection so I didn't have a doubt that it was mine. Therefore, I couldn't help but be excited. I knew that I'd still be in school when she had the baby so I was thinking about staying up there long term with her and not moving back home when I finished with college. I told my parents and they were excited too but also not all that happy about it because they knew they'd see me less. But I didn't care. I was ready. I had prepared my mind and even said that I would stop smoking for the good of the baby and for Heidi.

"But things didn't work out the way that I had planned them to. One day, Heidi asked me if I wanted to go out with her. And I said yes because she had finally stopped having morning sickness and I knew she wanted to go out and do something. We had ourselves a proper date. We went out to dinner and afterwards, we went for a nice long walk together. Stuff that couples do when they want to be romantic. And yes, I was actually into romantic things then."

Harry chuckled. "I see."

"But after a romantic night, we decided that she would spend the night with me at my place. So we went there. but when we got to the front door, we noticed that it was broken in. I was really worried so I had her wait outside while I went in just to make sure nobody was still inside. Nobody was, but they had taken everything I had. And when I say everything, I mean the only thing they really left me was my furniture and my clothes and little knick-knack stuff. But all my electronic things like my TV, my radio, my microwave, that was all gone. I didn't have anything."

Harry reached out and put his hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Zayn."