I sit there alone, the light from the moon the only thing making it possible to see anything. I need to stop using that word, alone. It's all I say now but it's true. An empty void that never seems to end. I'm causing Yoongi so much pain, so much grief, so much so that now he isn't healthy and people are beginning to notice. It's funny though because I still want him. It's like a spell that's been cast, a spell that Yoongi has put on me. I feel selfish because of it but I only have myself to blame. I pull my legs up to my chest, a small sigh leaving my lips.

"I miss him" Is all I can say.

"Yoongi you can't leave!" Jin exclaims trying his best to cover the door with his broad body.

"I need to see her! Just for a few minutes please!"

"Yoongi you can't. The comeback is tomorrow! That is our main priority. We already have that article of you floating around about suffering from extreme weight loss, we don't need another one of you in a dating scandal! You need to put us first!"

"I can't anymore Jin. I'm so worried about her, she needs me" Yoongi's eyes begin to water and his voice begins to break.

"I know Yoongi but please it isn't worth the risk"

As those words left Jin's mouth Yoongi pushed past him, knocking the poor boy out of the way. He was out the door and nobody could stop him.

I hear a knock at the door. My heart beginning to beat faster and faster. I open it slowly preparing to slam it shut just case. I continued to pull it further and further and what I was welcomed to made my heart skip a beat but also shattered it.

"Y-Yoongi?...."

Instantly the boy ran inside and pulled me towards his body. My knees become weak to his touch causing me to fall to the ground, Yoongi following after me. I was too in shock to cry and too dazed to speak properly.

"I'm sorry Y/n. I couldn't do it anymore, I needed to see you."

"Yoongi you can't be here. It's not safe yet and tomorrow is your comeback, you should be thinking of that first, not me"

"Screw the comeback" And with those words Yoongi plunged his lips into mine taking me by surprise. I didn't fight back though, I just let it happen. He held the back of my head so gently and I gripped tightly onto his shoulder. This sensation, god I missed it. His touch, his breathe, his voice, I missed it all. Now that I had it I wasn't going to let it go, who knew I'd regret it later.

He pulled away from my lips and stared deeply into my eyes not breaking contact. He hesitantly moved both his hands to the bottom of the jumper I was wearing taking it off leaving me just in my bra and leggings. My breathe hitched at the slight brush of his finger hitting my bear skin. I quickly had a glance at my arm remembering that I had relapsed, not only that but the scars as well. They were ugly, gross, who in the world would want to see them. I went to cover my arm with my hand as just looking at it made me anxious but he stopped me. "It's okay" he quietly said and suddenly I felt at ease. We didn't say a another word, we didn't have to. I lifted his shirt up as well, his bare chest wasn't something I had really seen before, not this close. My hands having minds of there own explored every inch of it. A small chuckle left his mouth as I did so. His hands both dropping down to my thighs lifting me off the ground, a squeal leaving my mouth as it happened and my arms gripping now onto his shoulders to gain balance. I was now level with his face, I liked being this close to him. He kissed me once more carrying me to bedroom as he did so closing the door behind him.

"What do you mean he just left?"

"I tried to stop him Namjoon. I really did" Jin's voice irritated, there was no way he was forgiving Yoongi, not for a few days, not when he's this stressed.

"Aish, why do things have to be so difficult? Tae and I will go get him, everyone else will stay here"

"Sounds good" Tae says walking into the room eager to go get his friend back and to see Y/n if for a mere few seconds before he'd have to leave again.

The two boys travelled quickly to Y/n's apartment. Both fuming and ready to hit Yoongi at the sight of him. With a loud knock at the door both boys were welcomed to Yoongi opening the door.

"Yoongi come on let's..... Oh my fucking god you have to be joking" As Tae finished his sentence and both boys push passed Yoongi to enter the apartment they spot Y/n in her room laying in bed with only the sheets covering her naked body.

"Yoongi you did not!" Tae by this point is enraged, not only at Yoongi but Y/n as well. His blood boiling in a few short seconds.

"Tae calm down. Come on Yoongi lets go now" Namjoon calmly says, remaining the only sane one in the room but still he avoided eye contact with me, he was disappointed, I could tell.

"Yoongi are you fucking joking. How could you run off the day before our comeback and just sleep with your girlfriend when you know it could be putting our career in danger!"

Yoongi wasn't going to back down, he was ready to bite back. His hands turning into fists, he was ready to burst any second.

"Still not saying anything huh?" Before any more can unfold between the two boys Namjoon grabbed them both by the arm.

"Both of you lets go! Sorry Y/n we'll contact you if we find anything out" He pulls both of the boys out the door slamming it behind him. I was left alone in my room and watched the chaos unfold in front of me. I was selfish and feared what the future may hold because of it. In the moment when Yoongi kissed me I forgot about everything but all it caused was more problems. I pulled me knees up to my chest. "You're a fucking idiot Y/n"

"Yoongi, how could you do that!" All six boys stand surrounding Yoongi. Mad and disappointed about what both Namjoon and Tae have told them about what unfolded at Y/n's apartment.

"You knew how dangerous that was. You knew and you still went. You're so selfish, you were ready to throw all our hard work away like it was nothing. Like we were nothing!"

"I'm... I'm sorry Jin. I'm sorry everyone" His voice slowly rising after each word left his mouth.

"Sorry doesn't cut it, not this time"

"Whatever" Yoongi pushed passed the boys and headed for his bedroom. He couldn't deal with it anymore, not now at least.

"Yep run away like you always do" Jin said. His face practically the colour red from the anger that continued to build up.

"Wait Yoongs" Jimin grabbed the boy's shoulder before he could leave. A comforting look in his eyes. He wasn't mad at Yoongi, he couldn't be, he knew how much he was struggling so being mad at him was unfair. "Aren't you going to wait with us for the music video to come out, like we do every time we have a comeback"

"Not this time Jimin, I'll see you tomorrow"

The boys stood there sad to how this occurrence had turned out.

"Jin did you have to be so aggressive?" Jungkook exclaimed trying to comfort Jimin at the same time.

"He deserved it, he was selfish"

"Just because you're jealous that he slept with Y/n doesn't mean we have to be so aggressive with him Tae" Jimin announced.

"I am not jealous!"

"Everyone calm down. We need to start being nicer to each other. I know the stress of the comeback as well as Yoongi's situation has all got us worked up but we just need to chill. Okay?" Namjoon, his voice was soothing bringing the tensity that floated in the air down.

"Come on, everything will be fine. Even if a dating scandal were to happen I'm sure it wouldn't be too bad. If they were true Army's that would accept Y/n, we have nothing to worry about"

Namjoon was always good like that, calming the boys down. He was good at making them feel loved and encouraged no matter the situation but even this time he wasn't so sure everything would be okay.

I sit in my bed waiting and waiting. As the clock reached 12am I quickly go to watch the music video as any true fan would. Of course my Youtube crashes as soon as I refresh the page. I try to fix it as fast as I can and finally I watch and listen to it, BTS's new music video and their new album. Instantly I fall in love with every song. My heart beating faster and faster. Every verse, every lyric, I can feel it in my body, in my heart. I forget about all my troubles, everything for a mere few minutes. Instantly afterwards my high was gone and I felt empty again. Sleep was not what I would be getting tonight as the anxiety was still there and continued to grow not matter what I did.

I awake the next morning with merely three hours of sleep. I grab my phone to turn the alarm off but what am I greeted with is about a dozen messages. As I open my phone I am filled with fear, my body freezing, everything freezing. My eyes widening at the sight of it all and my body no longer continued to function.

I've received messages from all the members except Yoongi, all in which saying the same thing.

"It's okay Y/n, it's not your fault. Everything will be okay, please call us when you can"

Not only the boys but from my mum as well. How does she even have my number?

"It will be okay sweetie. I saw the news but you're a strong girl and will get through this"

I knew straight away, the photos of Yoongi and I had been released. I read through it all, now the whole world knew. Tweets of people confused and upset, more and more articles beening released every second. "Suga has a secret girlfriend?" "Min Yoongi dating scandal?" "Min Yoongi dating scandal a few hours after comeback" Everything was different and everything broke my heart.

I then had then received a message from the person. Could I even call them a person anymore? No I couldn't, they weren't a person, they can't be. What human would do this to someone?

"You didn't listen. You can only blame yourself"

What was I going to do? There was nothing I could do. Maybe it was time to give up. I really am a weak girl.

I feel as though each chapter is getting worse and worse, I hope that's just me overeating as I'm really anxious to post this one.