When Amelia Parker moves back to her birth place, the only thing she's looking for is peace and a fresh start. But now, what can you really expect from a town that holds too many memories, memories that you want to forget.

And then, you catch the attention of the big bad boy of the town.

Suddenly Amelia's life is turned upside down when the stunningly gorgeous guy is hell bent on making her his. Surely, her plans of peace are disrupted.

With his bad boy persona, stunning gorgeous looks and a killer smile, Theodore King didn't expect to be drawn so badly to a girl he barely even knew. But when he sees her, the mystery behind her eyes, the face that held too many secrets, he craved something deeply for the first time ever, her.

And isn't it like the prime rule that what the bad boy wants, the bad boy gets.

But it isn't that simple.

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"When a panther pounces on its prey, it's a mesmerizing scene. You can't look away. It amazes you, captivates you. It's so beautiful and so lethal at the same time.

He's beautiful in a similar way."

While your cover does look professional, I'm a little thrown off by the lack of color in it. Using apps such as PicsArt can allow you to add filters and play around with its different features. Along with that, the font is a little hard to see considering it blends in a little with the background. Using font apps you can adjust and add shadows behind the text to make it stand out more, or just change the color.

Upon reading your blurb, I can definitely see where the title is coming from. I will admit that it isn't the most original title, but it suits your book and I can see you put a lot of thought into it. I advise that throughout writing your book, if you stumble across a quote your character uses or a significant object/word used frequently throughout your story, don't be afraid to use it as your title! That's how I stumbled across the title of my story: Lavender Liars. It will also give your readers a lightbulb moment when they connect the title to your story.

If you've read my other reviews, then you probably already know what I'm going to say. I find myself repeating this frequently, but it's important and I believe it will really help grab more readers for your story. The blurb should be only a few sentences long. Many readers are lazy, and if they aren't hooked by at least the third sentence, they'll probably click off your book. What you should do is write at most five to six sentences that describe the main plot and compose it in the best possible way you can. Try thinking about it like writing a song. You want it to be attention grabbing and relevant to your book. I gave you an extra point in this area (while many of my other reviews only got 2/5) because you did capture the main plot in your blurb. The only problem is that a lot of it can be shortened. Even just using the quote on the bottom would be a better alternative and add more mysteriousness to your story.

Your story does seem to revolve more around the contemporary/romance genre, so it definitely makes it harder to write a hook that will enrapture your readers upon first reading, considering that you can't really start off your story with a murder or some other mind-blowing incident. It makes sense to start off with a sense of normalcy in your MC's life. However, there are ways to even make the most mundane things exciting. From the hook, I've gathered that Amelia is conversing with her uncle. This is a fine way to start off the book, but there are many options that can be considered. Maybe add some mysteriousness to the hook. Where was she during those two years away from home? Was there a particular reason, and why? Readers can be impatient and leave if they aren't hooked fast enough. It's okay to add a personal touch to your hook. Maybe Amelia has bitter feelings about home, or aching nostalgia from returning. This will make your readers wonder why, and continue to read to find out.

Upon reading the first few paragraphs of your story, I have discovered a few comma splices, misplaced commas, and/or missing commas. Remember that commas are usually used to separate independent/dependent clauses, or to list things. Always ask yourself why you're using a comma, and if it can be replaced by a semicolon, question mark, exclamation mark, or period. Is the comma really necessary? Along with that many sentences you use, you separate the clauses with a comma, but forget to add a conjunction. I'm not sure if this is accidental or not, but unless you add a conjunction, the sentence will be grammatically incorrect. All of these are super common mistakes, and you aren't the only one. Don't panic about looking for these mistakes through your chapter; I will point out each mistake and correction during the specific details of your chapter. However, be sure to remember that I will generally only point out one kind of mistake, which means there might be a lot of mistakes that are the same. I don't want to point out every single mistake, because the goal of this review is to learn and improve by finding mistakes on your own. Then, using this skill, you can apply it to the rest of your chapters.

Upon reading your first chapter, I was able to come to the conclusion that you've clearly edited and gone through your work thoroughly. There are no spelling mistakes that I can spot, so you did a fabulous job at that! It's clear you don't need help in this area of writing. However, it's not a bad thing to get some extra help. After all, we as humans make mistakes. Using sites dedicated to spelling and grammar errors can really enhance your writing and catch mistakes you would not have seen otherwise.

Unfortunately, there are way too many Wattpad stories with the exact same plot as yours, or different variations of the same theme—which revolves around bad boys. It's especially difficult to make your story stand out when you're starting out with a very common cliche. Don't be afraid to mix things up! What makes your male lead different from the others? Readers want something new, but they also love the cliches. That's why it's always hard to please your audience. What is something that you want to read? What elements of a book do you wish are used more often? Try to incorporate that into your book because chances are, you aren't the only one with that mindset. Other than the originality of the plot, it seems that the course of your story is going strong. Make sure to throw in a few twists as well—always keep your readers guessing! Maybe your main character was engaged once. Maybe something horrible will happen, throwing off Amelia's love life off track. The best thing about writing a book is that it's up to you, so don't be afraid to extend the limit of your imagination!

I do enjoy the fact that each of your characters has their own unique voice. I can tell that Bridget is definitely the more outgoing of the two, while Amelia is a little more conservative and anti-social. However, there are many books on Wattpad that have similar characters with similar characteristics to yours. Don't be afraid to add a darker side to Bridget—after all, she could be suffering inside. The human mind is complicated, so don't be afraid to add as many sides to your characters as you want. It also makes them more real and relatable to your readers, and will want them to keep reading.

I really enjoyed reading your first chapter because your voice is very straightforward and easy-going. It was like a very smooth car ride; without any hitches or bumps. Your writing is very easy to read and is great for readers who might be reading on the go. This will attract more readers, and I actually shocked myself at how much I enjoyed your writing voice—considering that I'm usually more into long prose and vivid descriptions. You have an ability to paint scenes without even looking like you're trying; it comes very naturally to you. Of course, there is always room for improvement, and it's always great to experiment with different descriptions. One thing I personally like to do is when reading other peoples' stories, I take note of the vocabulary or descriptions they use that I like, and keep them in mind when working on my story. This does not mean it's a copy and paste moment; it means you can extend your vocabulary and look at scenes differently from how other writers describe their setting.

Your story flow is very natural and easy-going, and it smoothly transitions into the next scene. From what I can see, there's no awkward moments or hitches in your writing, so you did an amazing job with that! I love the dynamics you showed as you described the scene without breaking away from the plot and how you took the time to differentiate the characters without ruining the tension of your story flow.

So, now that the grading/feedback is over, let's turn the focus to the specific details of Chapter 1.

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In the beginning of your hook, it would make more sense to add a description after your dialogue as to not confuse your readers. Saying things such as where Amelia is at the moment, and where she's conversing/who she's conversing with will really enhance the experience your readers will have while reading this first chapter.

"I smiled, 'Two years apart won't make me forget my home, Uncle Mase.'" (paragraph 4). "I smiled" is a sentence by itself. The dialogue that comes after is introducing a different topic and should not be part of the sentence. The correct way to write this would be: "I smiled. 'Two years apart won't make me forget my home, Uncle Mase.'"

"It still felt surreal, the fact that I was back here was still hard to digest." (paragraph 5). Adding a comma in this sentence without a proper conjunction makes this phrase grammatically inaccurate. Unless you are going to replace the comma with a period or a semicolon, you should add a conjunction. Correction: "It still felt surreal, and the fact that I was back here was still hard to digest" or "It still felt surreal; the fact that I was back here was still hard to digest."

"She won't let me make excuses for tonight." (paragraph 7). Most of your chapter is set in past tense. However, this sentence is written in present tense. It may be confusing to convert this sentence to past tense considering you're writing about the future. There are many ways to convert this sentence to past tense while still hinting at the future. For example, "I knew she wouldn't let me make excuses for tonight." This sentence is describing the future without breaking the past tense.

In paragraph ten, you use a number in your sentence. If less than ten, numbers should always be written out or else it will appear unprofessional to your readers.

In paragraph eleven, you have another tense issue. Remember that your story is set in past tense, but you slip up and write in present tense sometimes. Think about how you can convert it to past tense, referring to my earlier example above. If you don't know how to rewrite it as tense, privately message me and I can help you.

"The dress I'd chosen was a deep black one, down till the middle of my thighs, with a plunging V-neck and backless bodice." (paragraph 12). This sentence is awkward. There are words that can be eliminated or replaced to make the description more clear to your reader. And try to think how you can describe this dress without making it boring. Use sensory detail, or figurative language to turn something factual into something magical. You can use mine as an example to write your own: "I'd chosen to wear a black dress, glittering under the stars as the silky material bluntly ended at my knees. I flaunted a daringly plunging V-neck with a backless bodice that screamed a bold statement—that tonight, I was someone else." Can you see how you can turn factual descriptions into something more? I also added a personal touch, explaining how the dress may have meant something symbolic to Amelia.

There is some unnecessary information in paragraph thirteen. There are a few times where you tend to ramble. Always ask yourself: Is what I'm about to write helping the plot? Is it truly relevant? Should I be writing this? Describing how her uncle checked her car tires is not important at all, unless you planned to strengthen the bond between Amelia and Uncle Mason. And if that's the case, then you should probably put more emphasis on that little detail. Did Amelia's heart glow in her chest as she experienced the memory? Did she feel protected and safe?

"'You can do this.' I chanted to myself." (paragraph 14). This sentence is inaccurate. Take a careful look at how you ended the dialogue—with a period. That means your next sentence is "I chanted to myself." However, that is not a sentence by itself. This is still part of the earlier sentence. Correction: "'You can do this,' I chanted to myself." Do you see how I've replaced the period with a comma? This happens several times throughout your chapter. When you are describing a dialogue usually with "she said" or "he said", the dialogue part should end in a comma. If this still doesn't make sense, feel free to contact me and I will do my best to explain this to you again. And go through your chapter thoroughly to catch these mistakes.

In paragraph fifteen, you misused a word. The word "revered" means great admiration or respect. However, you used it to describe the car as Amelia pulled out of the driveway. This word can be replaced with something such as "purred" or "roared" to describe the sound of the engine.

There is another tense slip up (paragraph 16). When you are referring to Amelia and her change, you use present tense. This should be converted to past tense using words such as "were" and "liked" instead of "like."

"The entryway was a shining golden and silver rather than the previous purple and black." The entryway was a shining golden and silver what? If you wanted to simply describe the entryway, take out the word "a" because that word indicates that you were planning to extend the description and say that the entryway was a shining golden and silver something.

In paragraph eighteen, this paragraph can be split into two. The first paragraph is describing the fact that Amelia can't find Bridget. But if you include that she did find Bridget in the same paragraph, it's likely that your readers will have to go back and reread it. It's easier to read if you split the paragraph and start another paragraph at "And then she appeared..."

"'Close your mouth birthday girl.'" (paragraph 20). There should be a comma there. Correction: "Close your mouth, birthday girl."

"... then her mouth turned into a grin." (paragraph 21). This is a passive voice. There will be more of an impact on your reader if you describe an action directly. "... then she grinned." It also eliminates a lot of unnecessary words.

"... pulling her into a flushed body." (paragraph 25). The word "flushed" is used inaccurately in this sentence. Flushed either means that the color of the skin changes, usually when you're blushing, or that something is sharing the surface with another. If you mean the latter, then the sentence should be written like this: "... pulling her flush against a body." Make sense?

Try to refrain from using a lot of exclamation marks. If you want to emphasize a point, it's best to use italics. This is also a better alternative to using all caps, which you are already good at avoiding, so I commend you on that.

I've noticed a lot of commas in your sentences. You are essentially writing run-on sentences and dividing them with a lot of unnecessary commas. A better way to write would be to separate your sentences with a comma and start a new sentence, or it begins to sound like you're writing a list.

"'Happy birthday princess.' He whispered..." (paragraph 28). There are a few things wrong with this sentence. First, "princess" should be capitalized. It is a nickname for Bridget, and unless he referred to her as "my princess," it should be capitalized. Along with that, there should be a comma separating the sentence. Lastly, "he whispered" is not a sentence by itself, it is part of the full sentence starting from "happy birthday." Therefore, "he" should not be capitalized, and the period ending the dialogue should really be a comma. The correct way to write this is: "'Happy birthday, Princess,' he whispered..."

"Then his blue eyes met my blue ones..." (paragraph 29). This is a bit of a tongue twister. We've already established that Amelia has blue eyes earlier in the chapter, and there are other ways to describe an eye color and make it sound less factual and more descriptive. Again, think of it like writing a song. "Then his aqua-blue eyes met my own..." You can use mine as an example to write your own description for Dean and add a personal touch.

When you describe Amelia seeing Theodore's green eyes, I was startled for a second. She was startled and had trouble breathing, and suddenly, she was looking into green eyes. It's better to backtrack and maybe describe their encounter as: "I looked up, only to encounter green eyes." Besides that, your description for his appearance is lovely! It paints a very vivid scene in my head. Just remember to scatter these kinds of details throughout your entire chapter, and not just save it for the important characters.

At the end of Amelia's POV, replacing the word "being" with "was" is a better alternative. "And the only thing running in my head was, Boy, I'm in trouble."

Most of the mistakes I've mentioned above also occur in Theodore's POV, although I'd like to mention that the errors have cleaned up rather nicely when it turned to his perspective. Make sure to apply the suggestions I've offered throughout the entire chapter, because I've only mentioned a few.

Honestly, I'm thrilled I was given the chance to critique your book. Your writing skills are coming around rather nicely, and you have an ability to enrapture readers while making it look effortless. This is really hard to do, so I'm very impressed with your ability! I sincerely hope you finish this book. With a little work, it can become something truly amazing.