carla

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"hello."

"im not angry."

"im just aggressively opening straws. every. thing. is. fine."

"why do you even care"

"ugh i hate how that worked. appealing to the environmentalist in me."

"um i bought a pack"

"uh yes."

"uh i dont know if you would get it"

"its just that im dumb."

"ok maybe im not dumb dumb. like im intelligent, i know i have the brains to get me places. but some people are just—excuse my language— so fucking infuriating and think im dumb and are so stuck on that."

"like my math teacher today pulled me aside and was like 'i have no idea why youre in this class..' blah blah you have bad grade and dont do the homeworks."

"its like she waiting for me to trip up and get a bad grade so she can march her ass down to guidance and move me to a lower level class—where by that point the system would be working against me."

"because you sound so smart and educated on the phone. here i am with people who want me to be dumb or i guess be dumber than they already perceive me to be."

"uh. no?"

"youre right."

"and you wonder why people think youre smart...its because you throw shit like that in their face"

"im joking. i understand what youre saying, ok?"

"im sorry"

"for using my defense mechanism—aka my horrible sense of humor—on you. i- its just that i didnt know how to respond and obviously i offended you. so im sorry"

"thank you. seriously for being there for me."

"so anyway whyd you call?"

"oh. bye jordan"

guys there is character development heading your way!! um i think this book is gonna be around 30 parts - i dont know. im waiting for the climatic part because honestly i have no idea how to write it. im really proud of how far this has come already lol and im already making plans to rewrite!!

-lila