《Dark Psychology and Manipulation》How to manipulate people: 13 proven strategies that really work!
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Now, you don't have to turn into an American Psycho master manipulator.However, it doesn't hurt when you know how to manipulate people the right way.
Manipulative people have a stereotype for being, well, highly manipulative,narcissistic and sociopathic. But this does not mean that manipulation is a bad thing.
I would say that there is a scale of manipulation that goes from persuasion to good... to evil. But listen, sometimes when someone is stopping you from getting something you want or need, you have to find another way to get it.
So, if you find yourself being the good guy and getting hit in every corner you do, it's time to play smart. I'll show you some techniques, however, you need to remember that manipulation only works when you don't see yourself being manipulated. If they catch you, it's too late.
It is normal to feel bad when manipulating someone. But sometimes, you have no other choice. If you feel like you've walked everywhere and taken advantage of someone,then it's helpful to know how to manipulate people. So, here are some strategies for you.
1. Work with their emotions. The easiest way to manipulate people is with their emotions. You saw it on TV and in movies, and it works like a charm. You want to guide them to feel in a specific way ... a way that benefits you. This is an emotional manipulation, I mean, if you're making fun of it, I understand.
2. Take possession of your emotions. Before you can manipulate someone, you will have to master your own emotions. If you are not in control of yourself, you are making yourself a target in your own game.
You have to laugh when it is necessary, shed a tear when necessary, in other words,you have to do an act. Depending on the emotion you want them to feel, you will need to be able to use your emotions even on demand.
3. Trust me. People who have been manipulated before are usually quite receptive to signs, so if you think trust can be a problem, you have to make them trust you.
The best way to do this is to open up to them and talk to them about something personal. When you open them, they will see that you trust them. If you are not good at acting, maybe you follow a rather true story.
4. Be nice. Listen, none of this will work if you don't like them. Whether you are a good person or not is irrelevant. Your goal is to make them like you. So, if you are a negative person, put those real feelings aside and let that smile out of you.Don't kiss them, because they will notice. But if you behave well, then you will slip immediately.
5. Learn body language. If you want to know how to manipulate people well, you need to be able to read people's body language. Most people's self expressions go through non-verbal communication. People might say "yes" or "no",but it's your job to read them and see if that's what they really mean. It's all in the body.
6. Guilty approach. This is one of the oldest and easiest ways to manipulate someone. The good old guilty approach. Your mom probably did this to you 1000 times when she wanted you to do something.
When someone feels guilty about something, they will try to fix it. This is when you suggest to them how they can compensate. It works best with people who are prone to feel guilty.
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7. Play victim. Personally, I can't stand people who play victim, but sometimes it works. If you play this card, you cannot use it all the time. People get tired of the victims after a while. But if you're going to use the victim's card, pair it with the guilty approach for the best results.
8. Use what you have. If you have a beautiful face or a beating body, use it to your advantage. I know it's bad to hear, but it's definitely the easiest way to get someone to do something.
People are superficial, so you can even get on that train if it gets you what you want. Also, sooner or later, your looks will fade away, and therefore you won't be able to use this method.
9. Take out the bribe. You are probably wondering if people are using more bribes, well, let me tell you, they do. If you want to make someone do what you want, bribe them.
You can bribe them with material, emotional or mental rewards. They will feel persuaded to do what you want because they consider it an advantage for them. But first,make sure you find out what that person needs.
10. Be in love. Sex sells, people. So, what you should do is bring out your charm and the coquettish side. By mixing both charm and flirtation, the person feels good. This usually works on people who are alone and have low self-esteem. I mean, it sounds horrible ... because it is. But I have a feeling you're not too worried.
11. Fear and Relief technique. This technique of manipulating people involves you playing with someone's emotions. This is to help the person when you see that they are going to give up. The goal is to give them an emotional boost that leaves them unattended. In those moments, they are more likely to do what you want.
12. "Feet in goal" technique. This is another classic and extremely effective.It is very subtle and complicated, which is what makes it so manipulative. Basically, ask them to do a small task and then to follow the real task you had in mind.
13. If you are caught, don't act manipulatively. This is a beginner's mistake when learning how to manipulate people. Once caught, they continue to exhibit manipulative behavior. What you need to do is act calmly and allow them to control the situation. You have to create doubts.
If you haven't heard of any of these manipulation techniques, well, I'm somehow happy to hear it. However, use these tactics for how to manipulate people, not necessarily to hurt, but if you can't get what you want. Try one of these techniques, they always work.
Maybe you didn't know, but we can all learn to be persuasive, to do yes, to those close to us. There are real tactics, the result of years and years of psychological studies,which serve to perfect the difficult and diabolical art of human manipulation. Yes, you understand correctly, persuasion is an art. Being able to convince anyone to say yes is a fine and subtle technique that can be learned and then put into practice. Call it persuasion or manipulation, without paying too much attention to the positive or negative connotation that the term must have, but in fact it exists.
It is that art that we involuntarily put into action, when we try to bring others to our side continuously, both to convince the partner to see the film we have chosen, that is to convince the son to engage in the study, and that is to demonstrate to colleagues of having made the right choice, it does not matter, it is appropriate to say that the end justifies the means. To make someone persuaded by our thoughts, you don't need to raise your tone or use sweet words. Persuasion techniques consist of a truly complex communication process in which words, tone of voice, listening, the ability to empathize with others count. We need very specific strategies.
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We put aside arrogance and try to make others do what we want,convincing them in a genuine and strategic way. Persuasion is a powerful force in everyday life and has a great influence on the whole of society. Think of the well-known population drivers, politicians, advertising managers. Politics, legal decisions, the masses, the news are all factors that are influenced by the power that persuasion creates. Anyone is affected by it.
Some feel so secure and immune, that they think they are not even touched by someone's persuasion; they think they have a natural ability to see through an attempt to sell, to understand the purpose of others well, and therefore to be able to reach autonomously effective conclusions. Unfortunately, this is not the case, because persuasion can be subtle, and how you respond to these influences can depend on a variety of factors that cannot all be controlled. For those interested in the topic, some useful and practical advice, the result of years of psychological studies performed on people of various bands.
We learn to listen: if we know what matters to the other, we can become persuasive.So first, we listen to the other to get as much information as possible about him. To convince a child to study more, it is essential to know what he likes, what he does, what he does not resist, what to leverage. If you are able to make it clear that you know more than your interlocutor, this will immediately recognize your credibility and authority and will make you convince more easily.
Giving a gift: the rule of reciprocity means that when we get something, we tend to feel indebted to a person who has given us a gift, until we somehow manage to pay back.This is what charities usually do when they give supporters a small gift. Better not to exaggerate, otherwise, there is the risk of cracking the altruistic motivations at the origin of the gesture of the other, and that the latter, receiving something in advance, feels satisfied and then unmotivated.
Appropriate language: it is a matter of choosing kind words, decided without involuntarily cracking suspicions of responsibility towards the other, helping him in a confidential dialogue, calling him by name and looking him in the eye. We must pay attention to the terms that could make the other feel pressured, evoking a counterproductive sense of antagonism and accusation. Formulate the speech using nouns rather than verbs. Asking "How important it is for you to be a winner at the next race" is more profitable than asking "How important it is for you to win the next race".
Stick and carrot: change the rate at which both positive reinforcements and negative disincentives are administered. Uncertainty makes learning faster. Maintaining behavior or longer, even when punishment and reward are removed, is helpful. It is the principle, or system, if you like, of chronic gambling addiction.
Leave the time to change your mind: we must not think of being able to persuade quickly. Leave the time and space to do it. If you have collected a refusal, repeat the same question after some time to the people you want to convince. It is probable that the motivations that had prompted at first to say no, in the meantime have vanished or are weaker.
Concept of the freedom of others: also say phrases like: "You are free to think it as you think! Don't feel obligated in any way". Phrases like these reaffirm the other person's freedom and avoid the other person feeling pressured or annoyed by your attempts to persuade. Instead, he will be more easily persuaded.
Persuasion is symbolic, it uses words, images, sounds etc.
It is a deliberate attempt to influence others.
The key is self-persuasion. People are not forced, instead they are free to choose.
The ways in which persuasive messages are transmitted can be numerous and varied, including verbal and non-verbal through television, radio, the Internet or face-to face communication.
Persuasion can really be applied in many ways; you can use the technique to persuade or swear.
In this chapter I just wanted to talk about how the art of persuasion can change the way you communicate and sell yourself, to achieve goals. Being good persuaders is an art,but also knowing how to defend yourself from the various persuasion techniques is useful to know for both reasons. It's like knowing how to use a weapon. It is useful for attacking someone, as it is for knowing how to defend yourself from someone else. Persuasion is a tool, and like any tool it can be used for right or wrong ends. Many of the concepts that have been elaborated in this post are intrinsic in our daily life, more than we are able to notice at first. With this section we have only tried together, to put some order in the chaos of the different intuitions that you may have had already in first place.
I hope, I have been clear in explaining the potential of these principles and make them even more tangible through practical examples. So, if you want, you can deepen your knowledge about it, giving yourself to the reading of interesting and curious books, which exist on the market.
The human mind always surprises us. Science continues to study it, but its deepest secrets are not yet known. The more scientist's study it, the more they come up with new puzzles.
We start from the idea that we know reality through the mind. We delude ourselves that being "rational" brings us closer to the truth. However, various experiments show that things are perhaps not quite like that.
There are many ways of deceiving the mind. Several studies have shown that it is possible to induce someone to perceive non-existent realities and to distort existing ones.The mind, therefore, is not only concerned with organizing the world of reason, but also with populating the world of fantasy. Below we will talk about the five experiments that prove it.
1. The mind and the illusion of the marble hand.
In 2014, a group of neuroscientists from the University of Bielefeld (Germany)conducted a curious experiment on the perception of the mind. The scholars gathered several volunteers asking them to sit down and place their hands on the table in front of them. Then, they gently hit their right hand with a gavel. At the same time, the sound of a huge hammer was hitting a block of marble. A few minutes later, all participants felt that their hands were stiffer, heavier and harder, as if they were made of marble. Their brains had combined tactile and sonic perception and, given that sonic was stronger, it had prevailed creating the illusion of the marble hand.
2. The prisoner's dilemma and temperature.
The prisoner's dilemma is a hypothetical situation proposed in game theory which shows that the best solution for people involved in a competitive problem is that they all cooperate in an organized way.
It is assumed that there are two complicit prisoners. They are separated and invited to betray each other. Several alternatives are proposed: one is offered complete freedom on the condition of betraying the other or that no one betrays the other and that both receive only one year of condemnation.
This dilemma was reproduced as a real experiment, one of the prisoners was put a hot object in his hand, the other a piece of ice. The same situation has been reproduced with other pairs of prisoners.
The result was always the same: the prisoner with the hot object in his hand was less selfish. Temperature seems to influence the way our mind processes information.
3. Prolonged isolation.
Prolonged isolation has been shown to have important effects on the mind. A significant case is that of Sarah Shourd, imprisoned in solitary confinement in Iran for 10,000 hours. Sarah began to have frequent hallucinations so that she could no longer understand if she or someone else was screaming.
Prolonged isolation, together with darkness, causes serious changes in the brain's perceptual capacity. In particular, the sense of time and body rhythm is lost. The daily cycle can increase to 48 hours, 36 of activity and 12 of sleep.
4. The McGurk effects.
Science has shown that the senses work together. They are a sort of "mix". What we feel is not independent of what we see, touch or smell. The mind combines these perceptions and builds global meaning. For example, it has been shown that if a person sees the needle of a syringe, he will feel more pain during the puncture or injection. It is not so strange, therefore, to close your eyes before the sting.
Various experiments have been made on this, with different senses. In England,some volunteers were invited to dine in the dark. The meal was a delicious steak, but once the lights came on, the diners saw that the meat was blue and most of them wanted to vomit.
5. The illusion of the invisible body.
The human brain confuses reality and fantasy with great ease. A few years ago, in Sweden, an experiment was conducted at the Karolinska Research Institute involving 125 volunteers who were given virtual glasses. Once worn, they saw themselves and beside a person who used a brush over them, to each brush stroke disappeared. While watching this scene, a person really touched them with a brush.
The participants had the feeling that they had become invisible. Later they were exposed to a very demanding public and their reactions were monitored: the stress levels were very low.
They were more relaxed because they believed they were invisible. As you can see,it is not so difficult to deceive the mind.
All these experiments show that brain perceptions can completely deviate from reality. In this case, it is a matter of physical experiences, but the same goes for abstract experiences. As much as we are convinced otherwise, we are not as close to reality as we think.
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