so, i updated! *puppy eyes* please tell me what you think abt the story so far! btw, just imagine jeongguk as the one dancing with jiho in the gif. –xoxo, nick 💕

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soft breathes as her chest continuously rise and fall, my eyes trailed on her peaceful facial expression – lashes tickling her porcelain like skin and lips slightly parted. the woman looks so peaceful – so different from the way she looked before with her swollen eyes, sunken cheeks and trembling state.

the man sat, still couldn't help the his heart swelled. 01:30, it was already morning and yet here was jeongguk watching her sleep—too afraid to slip under the covers for a fear of waking her up and she might lose the needed rest from the tiring day.

"i'm scared" as if on cue, tears were on the verge of trailing on the man's cheeks once more. the two words that escape on her precious lips seemed to haunt him – giving a painful reminder that he failed. failed in keeping the promise of protecting her, keeping her away from seokjin's clammy and abusive hands.

what have i done? jeongguk questions, it's making him feel so conflicted and terrified, hatred on himself seeping in the corners of his skin. lips quivering, she couldn't help but sob in pain, trying so hard to shush the way his lips let out shaky sighs to not wake her up.

what, why is my heart in so much pain?

everything just hurts and there's this surge of thousands of feelings bottling up inside his body – raw, new and dangerous. jeongguk was conflicted, why was he feeling this way? why does everything hurt and why can't he tame the way his heart churned in pain?

he was done loving jiho, right? he was done – enough, end and they're nothing but history and yet why? why is the man's eyes pooling with treacherous and untamed tears? why was his heart feeling like it was getting torn into two? why does he want to touch her and drown in her warmth? why?

cupping his head and kneeling on the floor beside their shared bed, jeongguk wept tremendously as his body trembled with the feelings choking him inside. never in his life had he imagined feeling this kind of pain and even feeling so ignorant why he was such a crying mess.

how much of a fool can he get?

wheezing and catching his breath, the man gently let out a puff of air as he tried to regain control – it was so unlike of him to breakdown and let's not talk about how he isn't even fully aware of the reason of his outbreak. eyes trailing on the peaceful woman who sleep warmly on the sheets – he couldn't help himself anymore.

pushing every hesitation at the back of his head, jeongguk's body moved on its own as he slid under the covers and embraced jiho's figure – letting himself feel the warmth that seemed to be his oxygen. skins touching, the moment jeongguk carefully nuzzled himself on jiho, the man felt a surge of calmness seeping in his skin as if this was the place he always belonged, as if this was the medicine he always needed that made all the pain away.

tightly embracing jiho's figure, he couldn't help but let his thoughts wander back to when they first met.

it was spring last twelve years ago, in college.

jeong jeongguk wasn't your muscle pig monster in college studying business administration. women didn't flock in his way begging for attention but teachers did because of his high grades, liquor and party weren't his friends but encyclopedia, manhwa and sappy novels are. jeon used to be the nerdy boy in the far corner who tends to sit at the front with his rimmed glasses – so stiff and antisocial and kim jiho was way out of his league.

one word to describe jiho was, sunshine. pleasing personality and everyone's friend – kim jiho was the business administration's student council secretary. warm and caring, she was the perfect person every girl in their campus died to be – possessing a body to die for and having a handsome boyfriend, she was a lucky girl with her bright emerald eyes, her smile being a grace for earth. having park jimin of the medical department's sister, the radiant and cheerful persona runs in the family.

oh and let's not mention about her cousin, jung hoseok of the arts department, as the man himself was the epitome of sun.

long story short, jiho and jeongguk was living on two different worlds – jeongguk was on the icy and plain antartica while jiho was on the warm and happy savanna. meeting one another was highly impossible but it only takes one simple mistake from jeongguk to finally have his fate move in a different path.

jeongguk fell asleep on that day until the library of the school closed. having so much to do – thesis, review for finals and running his own secret writing job, the young 22 years old was drained physically and mentally.

"fuck!" curses rarely escaped on his mouth but because he was in such a predicament, the boy couldn't help but let out words of profanities when he saw that his rolex clock read 20:00. fixing himself, not bothering on wearing his non-existent degree glasses, not bothering to properly place his things on his bag, he shoved all of his belongings and the next thing he knew was he was running in the poorly lit halls of the university.

jeongguk was already outside the campus and was just about to pass through the gymnasium when his ears caught a faint noise of water splashing and faint whimper. curiosity coursing through his veins, jeongguk couldn't hide the fact that he was quite intrigued as he found his foot inching its way on the swimming team's practice hall.

ethereal. eyes widening, the word easily slipping on jeongguk's thoughts from the moment he caught sight of the woman in the practice hall, his heart suddenly felt so tight as if all the oxygen in his lungs were taken. long wet hair while droplets of water ran on her face, despite wearing only a one piece swimsuit that hug her curves, jeongguk didn't seem to focus on the little wounds that surrounded her shoulders and legs but the way tears continuously flowed on her cheeks as she wipe them away – he had wanted to kiss the tears away and hug her.

have i mentioned how jiho was a part of the swimming team and was called the little mermaid?

a siren. at that point, jeongguk thought he was seeing a real time siren and before he knew it, his feet were already moving and blame his clumsiness and wimpyness – cause he just fell straight on the floor halfway to jiho's place.

"who—" "i'm sorry!" jeongguk trails, even before jiho could've finished her sentence. "i'm sorry. you just look so sad and you're crying! i'm sorry! you're so pretty and i don't know what's happening to me and like—" he stuttered which only resulted to a giggling jiho. "it's okay, jeongguk" it quite surprised the boy how she knew his name but nonetheless, he was grateful.

it was quite an embarrassing first meeting but, because of that the two's life crashed for the good. unexpected meetings budding into a one of a kind friendship, for the first time in his 22 years of living, jeongguk felt his heart thump with a fuzzy yet warm beat and he was getting addicted to it. right there and then he knew, he knew he was in for trouble as he was falling deep – deeper than anything has fallen unto.

life was good, but every fairytale has its own drip of madness.

as jiho and jeongguk instantly clicked, friendship becoming closer until it became bestfriends – the two was inseparable. jiho was starting to spend more and more time with jeongguk and for this, jiho's longtime boyfriend, jin became obsessive and possessive to what's more than necessary. jiho tried so hard to save their relationship, going into lengths into understanding jin and her friendship with jeongguk almost fell apart until, jiho started receiving abuse.

jiho tried to hide the way she hurt in the eyes of many but when she was alone, she couldn't help but break. seokjin used to be so warm and yes, there were few times in which he hurt her but it was tolerable but when jeongguk started becoming her friend, their relationship became toxic.

jiho tried so hard to hide until one day, jeongguk just found out about her wounds. jeongguk felt so lost once he saw the bruises and wounds that painted jiho's porcelain skin and just like that, the boy let all hell lose. twenty-two years old jeongguk whose stick thin, managed to knock the twenty-four year old, quarter back jin off with brutal damages on his face leaving him hospitalized.

after that incident, jeongguk started building his muscles up – all for the sake of jiho. despite having jin out of the picture, some of jin's fangirls were harassing jiho and jeongguk just couldn't take it. jiho tried reasoning that she was okay but, jeongguk never wavered. no, if it's okay with you then fine, but it's not okay with me, ji. i don't like my bestfriend getting hurt. the word bestfriend always left a bitter taste in jeongguk's lips but, pushing his unnecessary feelings, jiho's safety was more important.

ji and kookie – one year of friendship and jeongguk knew that he really fell too hard on jiho to the point of no escape. as far as he could remember, it was just a day left. the students were just about to have the summer break and he sure as hell wasn't looking forward on it – stuck on home with only video games, book and mansion that's too big for one person, he was dreading the vacation and most of all, he was going to miss jiho.

sighing for the umpteenth time of that day, jeongguk almost had a heart attack when jiho suddenly said that her brother was about to take his residency on a famous hospital (to practice his medical profession) and she was looking for a place to stay cause their home was quite lonely on her own.

"me! stay with me, ji!" giggles erupting on jiho's lips as it echoed in jeongguk's ears, that summer was the best one he ever had as they spend every second, every minute and every hour for the past fourteen days, together.

and jiho falling was not out of the question.

it was the last day of summer vacation when it happened, jiho used to question her feelings towards jeongguk as a source of refuge because jin hurt her but, as days come to pass by and as they see each other almost everyday her feelings were getting out of control. in one of the rarest moment – when jeongguk was sleeping beside her on the sofa, jiho couldn't help but steal a peck on the other's soft lips and that was when she realized that she's fallen too.

although, unbeknownst to jiho, jeongguk's eyes were only closed on that night.

jeongguk confessed his feelings – in a rather weird way. flat out saying, i like you and i'll treasure you, i want to make family with you and i want you to have my kids and i can't live without you so kiss me again like you did yesterday! and— it was quite an unflattering way to ask for a relationship but jiho just shut jeongguk up with a kiss and they instantly became a couple just like jeongguk wished.

being a couple was way different with being just friends and the two just had to adopt with the change because there where things that jeongguk always wanted to do – kissing and cuddling. whenever he had a chance, he would steal kisses on jiho's lips, not minding if they were out in the public or when its just the two of them together. jeongguk liked whispering how much he loved jiho and those were the dreamy state of the relationship.

as the two delve deeper into each other, some things are meant to be known. along their relationship, jeongguk came to learn how fragile and soft jiho was, despite her cheerful personality a deeper wound seemed to scar her deep within. one of those scars was whenever there was lightning. jeongguk used to think that jiho was just being paranoid but once the woman opened up about her fear and about her father, everything just comes into place.

knowing jiho deeper made jeongguk even more protective.

the two were drunk in love and so they let themselves be guilty of being addicted to its spell. when the two graduated, jeongguk didn't want to let go of jiho anymore as he had fallen so so so deep and the thought of having her slip away was just too much to take so, without further ado – on their day of graduation he proposed and in the span of three months they married and settled down.

everything was just perfect and dreamy and yet, yet how did they have to come to this point?

fast forward to the present time, jeongguk's memories flooded inside his thoughts like an unstoppable tornado and he couldn't help the way his breathing hitched, seeking calmness he snuggled closer to jiho and the thought of her slipping away is making him scared just as the way he used to when they graduated but hey—

isn't jeongguk the one who initiated the divorce?

just what are you feeling right now, jeongguk? i'm done with her. jeongguk keep telling himself those words and yet,

why do you seek jiho's warmth for calmness?

why do you find her presence like, home?

05:35

once the clock stroke in that time, jiho's eyes snapped open as the sun's light flickered its way on her skin. eyes trailing on her surroundings, her senses become more and more awake as she realized that she was home – but it doesn't exactly feel like home anymore. jiho's senses tell her that jeongguk was in the bathroom with the shower's water flowing as its sound echoed in the bedroom.

eyes pooling, memories of yesterday haunted her – she kept crying for jeongguk to come, kept screaming for his name to save her and yet . . . yet, he didn't come. i'm not needed and he doesn't love me. hugging herself under the sheets, her sobs comes short when she heard her phone ring.

ANSWER | DECLINE

ANSWER | DECLINE

maybe, i should apologize. "he—" "are you okay?" even before jiho could've properly greeted the man, taehyung cut her voice as he started to bombard her with questions. "are you okay? did you sleep well? how are you feeling—"

warm. with taehyung's worried voice echoing in her ears, jiho felt a warm fuzzy feeling bud inside her chest and just like that, she felt peace coursing through her veins and before she knew it, her mouth starts to speak on their own.

"thank you, taehyung. thank you so much—" voice breaking, jiho just couldn't help but break. "i'm so sorry for treating you like shit yesterday. i'm thankful, so so thankful because you where there. i'm so grateful that you came and if it weren't for you—"

"it's okay" shutting her once more, taehyung's warm and deep voice seemed to lull her. "but—"

"i'd do anything just to keep you and yeon, safe" breathe hitching, jiho's eyes widened at the sudden revelation. "i—"

"i'd do anything for the woman i love" and that was it – as if on cue, jiho started crying like a child on the phone, uncontrollable surge of happiness, pain and overwhelming thousands of emotion running in her little body made her insides tingle with the words taehyung had just uttered. it feels great, it feels warm and she feels loved – something she's been yearning for someone.

hearing how somebody still treasures her and ready to catch her when she falls makes her heart swell with unexplainable feelings she couldn't seem to fathom and put into words. "i—i'm so sorry for ignoring you, i just didn't . . . didn't know how to react when you kissed me when i fainte—"

a cough then a hissing taehyung on the phone –tangina—jiho heard an unfamiliar word, "tae—"

"jiho as much as it tempts me to kiss you, i'm sorry. i don't know what you're talking about" eyes widening jiho's heart suddenly hammered in her chest.

"but—"

"on the day you fainted your husband took you home without my consent"

"th—then—" lips quivering and cupping her lips, the pieces finally fit the puzzle. shaking her head in disbelief, her thoughts were yet again clouded with grief, hatred and anger. "jih—"

"please, can you—can you come here at nine?"

"oh—okay, i will" and the moment taehyung and jiho's call ended was the same time jeongguk came out of the bathroom.

fuming with anger as her insides tingle with a burning passion of hatred, jiho spoke as if her words were dripped with poison. "was it fun?"

was it fun fooling me?