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Killuas POV

A whole burst of emotions hit me as we kissed.

Why... why is gon kissing me?!

I pulled away.

"Gon..." I said and blushed.

"Killua" he whispered back, giving me shivers.

Did I like the kiss??

I looked down and turned away.

"I'm gonna go to bed." I mumbled and he grabbed my arm, making me flinch.

"Killua! Please, let me talk" he pleaded so I turned towards him.

"Killua, I like you. I've liked you for who knows how long. And when you started dating Chrollo, I started dating trystan so that it would be a distraction from my feelings for you... but I love you killua. I know it isn't fair for me to be doing this right after you went through a break up, but I couldn't hold my feelings in anymore" his eyes were watering.

He likes me??

I opend my mouth to speak but nothing came out.

"Gon... I-I don't know" I rushed out and went to my room.

"Killua!! Please, don't run from this!!" He begged as I walked away.

"I'm not! Just let me think!" I said, crying.

When did my tears come?? Why am I crying!?

I went into my room, shut my door and leaned against it. I heard gon sit on our couch.

He was crying silently, calling himself stupid every once and a while.

Do I like him?? I mean i like him as a friend... but as a boyfriend...

The word boyfriend hit different.

"Boyfriend... gon" I mumbled to myself.

I can't just date him because I feel bad! I want to actually love him!!

I ran my hands through my hair.

I mean... I was jealous of him when he was with trystan. And I felt empty when I kissed Chrollo around him. So why do I not know if I like him?!

Kurapika. I needed Kurapika.

I ran out of my room and zoomed through the door as gon yelled my name.

I walked down the hall for a littler but then stopped in front of his dorm.

I knocked.

"What the hell do you thing your doing, at 2 in the morning" Leorio mumbled in anger.

"Sorry, it's me" I told him, and once he saw my tears I was let in.

"Was it Chrollo again??" He asked and I flinched at the name.

"No. Where's Kurapika"

"Oh right, your here for Kurapika, not me" he rolled his eyes and I glared at him.

"He's over there" he pointed to the left door.

"Thanks"

I walked up to his door and knocked.

What the fuck am I doing?? It's 2 in the morning!"

I heard him moan something and get up.

"Hello?" He asked opening the door.

"Kurapika... I umm, can I ask you something" I mumbled in embarrassment.

"Yea, sure come in" he told me tiredly.

"So... gon kissed me" I burst out and Kurapikas eyes widened

"Oh no..." he mumbled

"And I don't know how I feel about him but he's waiting for an answer" I blushed thinking about how stupid I sounded.

"And this happened at 2 in the morning!!" Leorio shouted through the door.

"Leorio! Privacy!!" Kurapika shouted back, rubbing his head in frustration.

"Well, I know this isn't much help, but I really think you should talk to him. Tell him that you don't know yet, I've known gon for a while, I know he can set his feelings aside if he needs to." He told me.

"Ok, I can try that" my eyes were watering

Why are they watering?!

"Killua it's ok!!" He hugged me, and patted my back.

"Kurapika your gonna be a great dad" I laughed and pulled away.

"Thanks" he smiled "but this isn't about me! Go tell gon what you think!" He said encouragingly and I rushed out, bumping into Leorio.

I glared at hem but kept walking.

"Leorio, come here!" Kurapika shouted madly.

"Hmm" he grumbled and I heard Kurapika shouting to him about privacy.

"Gon, I need to talk to you!" I told him and burst into his room.

He was asleep.

"Ugh... gon wake up" I said shaking him.

"Mmh... killuaaa" he moand.

"Stopp!" He said and batted me away.

He's so cute.

Wait, what am I saying!!

"I need to talk to you" I said.

"Right now?? If you didn't notice, it's really late" he mumbled sitting up.

"I know, I'm sorry but it's important" I sat on the end of his bed.

"I talked to Kurapika."

"Ok...?"

"I don't know gon. I don't know what I feel, I'm not sure if I'm even ready to date again or what I even feel about you" I mumbled.

"Killua... that's fine. I'm sorry for rushing in earlier. I just didn't want to hold in my feelings any longer" he looked anywhere but my eyes.

"Thank you for understanding gon... I wish I could have an answer sooner but I don't."

I suddenly heard soft crying.

"Gon??" I looked at him and saw him wiping his eyes.

"Sorry, I'm ok I promise. I'm gonna go to bed" he mumbled and got under his covers.

"Goodnight" I said and left the room.

I'm sorry gon

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