Killua has been holding in for about a month now. He refuses to do many things and I've started to get worried for him. I was planning on asking him out when he got better and passed on, but he still hasn't.

Killua please, stop holding all your feelings in.

I walked up to his room.

I need to tell him...

"Killua?" I asked and walked in on him changing.

Oh god.

He had some shorts on but he was shirtless.

I haven't seen him like this in a while...

"I-I'm sorry I can l-leave" I mumbled, blushing.

"Hmm? No it's fine..." Killua told me, covering his chest.

"W-well I need to tell you something"

Oh man I lost all my confidence

"I need to tell you something too" Killua said looking down

"You go first" I told him

"I-I'm sorry. I've been really bad at communicating and I've just been in my room all day every day mourning... it's not fair for everyone else." He burst out

"No! Killua it's fine... plenty of us understand what your going through. It's ok to be alone sometimes" I told him.

"Ok" he whispered.

"Well... now it's my turn." I gathers up all the courage I had and started to talk.

"Killua I have to tell you something... and I've been waiting to tell you for a while" I mumbled and grabbed his hand.

"I-I think I have a crush on someone but I don't think they will accept someone like me" I whispered so quietly I could barely even hear myself.

But he still blushed and pulled his hand away.

"What are you saying... someone like you?" He asked me, covering his still bear chest.

"A crush??" He asked again.

I couldn't get any words out.

Why can't I just say it's him?!

"I-I like... no I l-love you-" someone burst into the room.

"Hey guys!!" Katelyn shouted.

I forgot, we're having a movie night tonight

"Umm what's going on here..." she snickered, looking at killuas bear chest. He quickly threw a shirt on.

"Nothing"

Phew... I don't think killua heard me...

"Ok.. well let's get started!! We're watching a quiet place, right?" She asked and I nodded.

"Killua, if you want to join in our movie night then your more then welcome" I told him smiling and me and Kate went into the living room.

We gathered too many pillows and blankets to count. Once we had made our pizza and rented the movie killua walked out.

"Can I join?"

Finally! He's doing something normal.

"Of course" she said smiling and we all piled onto the fluff.

Kate had sat inbetween us. And I was greatly annoyed about it. I wanted to sit next to killua. So I gave her a look that could have only said 'I wanna be by him' and so she got up.

"I'll be back, I'm making the popcorn" she told us.

"Don't start the movie without me!!" She went into the kitchen and started the popcorn.

I slowly scotched closer to killua, trying not to let him notice. Finally Kate came back, interrupting our conversation about which was better, chocolate or gummies.

"Popcorns ready!!" She sang sitting on the other side of me.

"Let's start!" Killua said excitedly and we started the movie.

"AGHh!!!" Killua screeched and scooted towards me.

I just giggled "Killua, that wasn't even scary" Katelyn told him laughing.

"Y-yes it was!" He pouted.

He's so cute

"Think what you wanna think" she told him shaking her head.

About a minute later killua jumped so high I thought he was gonna get hurt.

"Killua..." kate cracked up.

"That was even less scary then before!!"

"I-it was sooo s-scary" he started to hug a blanket.

I want him to hug me...

I scooched closter to him again.

"Gon??"

Oh no, he noticed!!

I just tried to look confused "Hmm?"

He looked away "never mind"

We continued the movie.

I wanna be the one killua hugs so bad... I wanna be there for him

At this point I wasn't even paying attention to the movie.

I suddenly heard a loud noise and jumped.

"Look who's getting scared now!" Katelyn told me laughing and killua giggled.

"Stupid neighbors..." I complained.

"Guys I'm gonna make more popcorn ok?" Kate told us and started to walk away but then winked at me.

Oh my god

I rolled my eyes and looked at killua, who was blushing.

"Killua...?" I asked and he looked away.

"Umm, gon?" I looked up "yeah?"

"What were you starting to say earlier... about a crush?"

Oh no. Why did this have to pop up now??

"Oh!! Haha, umm it's nothing" I lied.

Killua eyed me "gon, I know your lying. You can trust me" he traced patterns on my hand and my heart skipped a beat.

"I know" I whispered

"Well then why don't you tell me??" He asked looking right at my face.

"I-I don't know... I can tell you later. Right nows not a good time" I told him looking away and he moved his hand away.

"Ok"

Katelyn walked back in.

"Wow! It's quiet!!" She teased "Deep conversation?!"

When no one responded she looked away.

"Really? Sorry... umm let's just start the movie"

Killua nodded then un paused it.

When the movie was over Kate left after we had cleaned and me and killua sat in the living room.

"I miss it" he said after a long silence

"Miss what??"

"When we were all friends. It's not the same without Phinks and..." he couldn't say the last names.

"I know" I whispered sadly.

He had a point... ever since they broke up we all kinda made a silent pact to not talk to them anymore...

"I wish he didn't cheat" he started to cry.

I didn't know what to say so I said a really stupid thing "I know... but your not alone"

He looked up "you don't get it gon. I am alone. You have never had to find out that the love of your life cheated on you. trystan, Leorio, Kurapika and Katelyn all don't get it either" he cried.

"None of you get it..."

I walked up to him.

"I'm sorry... I know I don't get it, I just wanna help" I told him and he looked up at me. I suddenly picked up his hand and held it tight.

"I wanna help..." my eyes started to water as I pulled killua up.

"Will you let me?" I whispered.

He looked confused but then whispered back.

"Of course"

I couldn't control myself.

I leaned in and kissed his tear filled face. At first he was surprised but then he kissed back.

It felt wonderful, but didn't last long until he pulled away.

"Gon..." he mumbled, blushing.

"Killua" I whispered back.

I'm so stupid.