You know what?

Maybe people ae right.

What if I am a horrible person and I don't even recognize it?

Lots of people have told me in the past, that I am and slowly I start to believe it.

I do things I don't want mean and they hurt people I don't want to hurt.

__________________________________________________________________________

Why?

Why fighting?

I hurt people around me and when I want to apologie, they ust shoot me with more of my mistakes.

So why fighting, huh?

It feels nice and it looks satisfying.

I actually talked about this with two of my friends a few days ago and we said that my psyche would suffer i I'd do it.

But I don't care anymore.

My psyche isn't fine, it's broken, but I don't think I can save it.

I can't even talk to people or do anything without hurting somebody.

And I'm tired.

I'm tired of hurting people, because it hurts myself.

So... tell me.

Why fighting, when there is nothing to fight for?

________________________________________________________________________

I'm seeing my psychologist today, so maybe it'll help, but honestly?

I don't think so...