"we haven't said it, but we both feel it"

⋆✧⋆✧⋆

I shut my textbook for the first time in what feels like hours and decide to stop studying for a bit. I exit my room and walk downstairs, heading straight to the kitchen.

I have the whole house to myself tonight. Jemma is out with Chase and the rest of the girls are at their own place. The boys have a hockey game tonight but I was too swamped with classwork to go.

I pull out an orange from the fridge and start peeling it. My phone starts to ring, effectively startling me, and I pick it up off the counter.

I look down at the screen and notice the call is coming from Sterling. Weird considering he should be in the middle of a hockey game right now.

"Delaney?" Luke's voice is the first thing I hear when I answer the call.

My heart instantly drops when Sterling isn't the person on the other line, and I prepare myself for the worst.

"Luke? What's up? Where's Sterling?"

"Don't panic." His voice is surprisingly steady and calm for the two words he just uttered.

Instantly, I feel sick to my stomach.

"Don't tell her that, that's what's going to make her panic, give me the phone you moron," Mason tells off Luke and his voice gets louder as, I assume, he takes the phone from him.

"What the fuck is going on?" I ask, desperation dripping from my words.

"Sterling is in the hospital."

"What?" My voice breaks and I will myself not to start crying.

"Delaney, relax, he's okay."

"No he's not! You don't go to the hospital when you're okay. You go to the hospital when you're hurt, or sick, or dying," I practically yet at Mason through my phone.

"Delaney," Mason's voice is placid trying to get me to calm down.

"Oh my god," I mutter. "What happened? Is he okay? Which hospital? I'll be right over, I just need to get my shoes on, and find my bag." I start frantically walking around my house, looking for everything I need. I'm so panicked I can't even remember what I do need or where it is.

"Keys," I start listing things off out loud, Mason probably freaked out by me on the other line.

"Wallet,"

"Delaney," he tries to get through to me.

It's no use.

"Jacket. I need a jacket. Hospitals are cold." I move on to the next item, not even having found the previous two.

"Where the fuck is everything I need? Why can't I find shit?"

"Delaney, listen to me."

"Shoes." I go to the front door to look for shoes.

I find a pair of running shoes and struggle to get them on. Who knew how hard laces were to tie?

"You need to calm down, I promise he's okay. Just take a deep breath and listen to what I have to say."

"Crap, I don't even have my car. Chase has it. I'll need to call an Uber or something."

Then there's a knock on my door

"That's the girls. They know. I got Theo to call Aspen. They're gonna take you to the hospital, okay? Now let them in and let them help you find everything. You just need to calm down, Sterling is fine."

I do what Mason says and let Daisy, Beth, Harper, and Aspen help me get ready and drive over.

Unfortunately, none of the girls can give me any information. They know as much as I do; that Sterling is in the hospital. That is it.

⋆✧⋆✧⋆

After what feels like the longest car ride of my life, we arrive.

Harper goes to park the car while the rest of us get out and walk into the hospital.

The girls lead me through the hallways and over to wherever Sterling is. We make it to the waiting room and spot the guys all standing around. Aspen goes straight to Theo and Daisy to Mason. Beth and I follow suit, walking closer to the group.

The only guy not with us is Luke and before I can ask where he is, I hear his voice coming from Sterling's room. "I don't get the big deal!"

"I told you not to call her. She's probably freaking out. Panicking over nothing." The sound of Sterling's voice floods me with relief.

"Sterling, you were unconscious and in the hospital. It's Delaney. We had to. She had to know," Luke argues back, clearly annoyed.

I listen to the boys bicker as Sterling continues. "But I'm fine, and now she's not."

"Well, I think she's here, so why don't you go tell her yourself." Luke sounds exasperated as he walks away from Sterling and over to us, closing the door behind him.

Luke is still rolling his eyes in frustration as he stops in front of me to speak. "He's mad. He told us not to tell you. He's being a little bitch right now. I'm going to leave, and get as far away from him as possible before I rip his head off. You're good though, he's not mad at you, he could never be mad at you."

Before I have the chance to question Luke any further, he continues walking, heading in the direction of the nearest vending machine with Owen.

"Why is he mad?" I turn to Mason instead.

"Because the first thing he said after getting hit on the ice, the last thing he said before he passed out, was to not call you."

"Why?" Now I'm asking Theo.

"Because he didn't want to worry you. He doesn't think this is worth worrying about. Honestly, he doesn't think he is worth worrying about."

That sounds like the Sterling I know.

"Ok, can I go see him?"

"Please." Owen enunciates the word, a testament to all of the guys' annoyance right now.

I take a breath and clear my head.

I open the door and take in the sight in front of me. Sterling is lying in the hospital bed looking uncharacteristically small. He's dressed in one of those dumb hospital gowns and if I wasn't both annoyed at him and scared for him, I'd be laughing at it.

"I'm sorry, Laney. I told them not to call you," Sterling starts apologizing the minute I walk in.

"Are you okay?" I ask, no emotion in my voice.

"Yeah, I'm okay."

"You're not dying or in critical condition?"

"No, Laney, I'm not."

"Ok, good. Well, in that case, fuck you." My arms cross over my chest and I stay put, not walking over to his bed.

"I– ok, that's not where I thought this was going." Sterling looks confused, his brows furrowed and his head tilted quizzically.

"You don't get to decide things for me. That is my choice to make. When something happens to you, I need to be the first person to know."

"And why's that?" he challenges.

My chest constricts and heat rises to my cheeks.

"Because I said so," is all I come up with.

Sterling just nods his head, a small smile taking over his lips. "Ok, fine, Laney. You will be the first person to know next time something happens to me."

"Promise?" I say, barely audible.

"I promise." His green eyes peer into mine.

"Good."

"Now will you come over here, please?" He slowly moves to the left of his bed, making room for me.

My feet carry me over to him and I fill the emptiness next to him.

As I lay next to Sterling, my head resting on his chest, listing to the comforting sound of his heart beating, I think back to his question.

Why?

Why do I need to be the first person to know when something happens to him?

Why was I so worried when I got the call?

Why was the idea of losing him so fucking scary?

And the only conclusion I can come to is because I love him.

Oh crap.

I think I really do.

I am in love with Sterling Blake.

Shit.

How did I let that happen?

⋆✧⋆✧⋆

Another short chapter, I know. But I promise my next few are going to make it up to you. I really don't want to take a break from posting while I'm on my trip so I'm trying my best to have some chapters ready.

Also, the day I post this chapter, it will be my birthday! Yay.

Question of the chapter: When is your birthday? Try and find your twin!

Please vote and comment!

Stay safe and healthy <3