"sometimes you think you want to disappear, but all you really want is to be found"

⋆✧⋆✧⋆

I softly slip out from Sterling's grasp and stand up from the warm bed. Pulling on one of his hoodies and a pair of fluffy socks, I descend the stairs in desperate need of breakfast.

I pour water into the kettle and let it heat up as a search for a mug and a teabag.

"Left side." Mason's voice startles me.

I open the left door of the cabinet and, sure enough, find the mugs.

"You want tea too?" I turn back at him to ask.

"Sure, that would be great."

Nodding my head, I reach for another and put a teabag in each mug.

"How is he?" Mason's words come out somewhat strained which kind of surprises me.

"He's alright, why? Should I be worried, was the fight worse than he lead on?"

"No, don't worry, Delaney. He's fine, physically, at least. It's just– usually he's still pretty aggravated after a fight, especially when the cause of it is someone he cares about."

His insinuating tone almost makes me blush.

The kettle dings and I pour the hot water for the two of us. "You've known Sterling for a long time, right? You and Daisy?"

"We have, yeah. He's been my best friend for as long as I can remember."

I take a big sip of my tea. "That's nice."

He smiles nostalgically.

"You talk about it like he gets into fights often, does he?"

Mason hesitates, "This conversation might be something you want to follow up on with Blake, but yeah. He did, at least." He clears his throat. "He's told you about his mom, correct?"

I nod my head.

"He took her death pretty hard. He was pretty angry at the world for a few years after that."

My eyes dart to the mug in front of me and I keep them there, not really able to make eye contact with him while he's talking about this. God, I can't imagine what that did to Sterling.

"Luckily, he had hockey. I think that really helped him gain control over his anger and channel it into something. But when it got too much, he resorted to knocking people out." He takes a breath, needing to figure out what to say. "Usually, after these fights, he would be pretty hard to reach. In his own head, I think the guilt weighed him down. He wouldn't really talk to anyone, not even me or Daisy, only Charlotte."

"I see." Is all I can come up with.

"Which is why I was wondering how he's been doing, he hasn't been in a fight for a little while."

I shrug my shoulders and think back to last night. "Maybe you'll be a better judge of it and maybe I'm missing something, but he seemed okay to me. I mean, sure, he wasn't the happiest I've ever seen him last night, but after we talked a little and I got him cleaned up, he was fine. We spend the night watching a show and fell asleep, felt like a normal night to me."

"It's you." Mason concludes, sitting back into his chair and crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"What's me?" I ask, not really understanding where this conversation is going.

"Blake, he's different since meeting you."

"Oh?" Is all I can formulate.

"Don't worry. I mean in a good way."

Holy shit.

Mason is now sporting a goofy yet almost cocky grin. "He's much happier, more talkative, less frustrated. Simply put, you're good for him."

Now I really do blush. My cheeks heat up as blood rushes to my head. My heart picks up and I have trouble reading my own emotions.

"Thank you," my voice is full of sincerity and candour.

Mason takes a sip of his tea and his eyes crinkle in a smile. "No, thank you. Really, it makes me happy to see him happy."

Alright, I need a change in conversation. "So, where's Daisy this morning, she didn't stay over?"

He shakes his head, "She had a test this morning so I dropped her off at her dorm tonight."

"Ah, I see. Well, I'll have to call her later and see if she wants to go out to lunch with me."

Staying with Sterling the last week or so, I've gotten a lot closer with Daisy. We go out to lunch practically every day and I'm so glad I've been able to spend time with her. She really is one of the kindest people I know.

"Good morning," Sterling's voice comes out raspy and tired as he makes his way down the stairs and over to me.

He's shirtless and wearing plaid pyjama pants sitting low on his hips.

Well fuck me, good god.

He looks between the two of us and he rolls his eyes. "Why is she smiling, Young? What did you say to her?"

"Nothing, man," Mason plays it cool. "We were just talking about Daisy."

He obviously doesn't believe that but decides against knowing. "Mhm, whatever, I don't even want to know anyways."

⋆✧⋆✧⋆

"So, how was the test?" I link my arms with Daisy as we exit her dorm and make our way to my car.

"It was okay, I think. I guess we'll see in a few days."

We spend the car ride chatting about our plans for the future — which mostly consists of a lot of 'I don't know yet' — and we arrive at the cafe.

We take a seat in a small booth and order our food.

"How was your morning, Laney?" Daisy asks as she stacks our menus and puts them off to the side.

"It was good, pretty uneventful. Although, I did talk to your boyfriend."

She raises an eyebrow out of curiosity and her dimples deepen at the mention of Mason. "What about?"

"We actually talked about Sterling."

She smirks knowingly and avoids my confused gaze by taking a sip of her coffee. "What about Sterling?"

"Well, we talked about him in high school. How he used to get into fights a lot." Daisy nods solemnly at my words. "Mason said he's really different now, though." I clear my throat, "actually, he said it's because of me."

She smiles in an agreeing manner with her boyfriend. "He is. Mason is right. Sterling went through a lot and it affected him pretty heavily but I think being around you has made that a little lighter for him. Not to sound like a TV show, but it's true, I won't say you changed him because I don't think that's necessarily the case, but he definitely changed because of you. For you."

"What does that even mean, though?" He changed for me? I didn't ask for that. And why me?

"He's more open and talkative because you are and he wants to be around you. He's kinder, not that he wasn't before. He just softened his tough exterior."

"Oh,"

She laughs at my speechlessness and quickly changes the topic, sensing my need to think about her words before I can really respond to any of this.

"Not to kill the mood, but have you talked to Jemma or Chase?" Daisy has been my rock throughout this dilemma, if you can even call it that. It was helpful to have an outsider of sorts and someone who knows relationships so well. She could help approach it with unbiased opinions and a clear head.

I groan slightly, "I don't know, I've been avoiding them this whole time. But I know I need to talk to them."

"Why don't I drop you off with them. I'll take your car back to the boy's house and tell Sterling to either come pick you up when you need it or to drop it off at your house, depending on how the conversation with them goes."

"Okay, that sounds good."

⋆✧⋆✧⋆

Daisy dropped me off about five minutes ago and I've been stalling on the porch ever since. Deciding I need a push, I call Aspen.

"What's up, bitch? How's married life, living with your husband and such?"

I ignore her comment entirely and move to the issue at hand. "I'm on my porch."

"What?"

"I'm sitting on the porch of my house. Like the house I share with Jemma," I explain rather awkwardly. "And technically, I'm stranded. Daisy left and took the car but I haven't been able to go inside so I'm currently freezing my ass off."

"Woah, I did not expect that."

"I just don't want to walk in and catch her and Chase going at it again. Then I think, I would lose my mind."

"Dell, Didn't you hear?" She voices with hesitation.

"Hear what?"

"They broke up."

My heart sinks into the pit of my stomach.

"They what?"

"Yeah, Jemma was so upset about it, she broke things off with Chase until she could patch things up with you and get your blessing, I guess."

"I mean you know her, you know what being on the outs with you does to her. She couldn't take the guilt of being with him while you were mad so she ended it."

"Oh my god, okay. I'm going in, I'll update you in a bit."

"Alright, good luck, babes." She hangs up the phone and the newfound silence swallows me whole.

I open the door and walk into the living room. The air is still, as if no one has lived in this house for hundreds of years.

"Jemma?" I call out as I walk upstairs and other room, slightly getting flashbacks to the night I caught her and chase but I try and ignore that.

I knock on her door but before I can even ask to come in it opens, revealing Jemma on the other side.

"Delaney?" Her eyes widen at the sight of me.

"Hi." I take in her appearance and I almost wince. She looks exhausted and frankly, miserable. Her usually bright eyes are red — probably from crying — and her hair is up in a messy bun, a direct contrast to her usual pin straight and perfect blonde locks.

"Um, hi, come in." she moves to the side of the doorway and I walk over to her bed, taking a seat at the foot of it.

"You're an idiot." Is the first thing that flies out of my mouth.

"What?"

"You broke up with Chase?" I elaborate through a question.

"Uh, yeah, I did. I just didn't feel comfortable staying with him, not when the two of us didn't have a chance to talk about it."

"Jemma, I know I was mad — I still kinda am — but I want you to be happy. Chase makes you happy, right?"

She nods her head slowly and timidly, trying to gauge my reaction with every inch she moves.

"I'm not completely blind or stupid. You're my best friend, I know you like the back of my hand. Although I think I was in denial for the most part, some part of me did know."

"Know what?"

"That you were, at least, crushing on him."

"Oh god," she buries her face into her hands, "Was I that obvious?"

I pull her hands down to make her look back at me. "The both of you were, I just ignored it and hoped I was wrong. not because I didn't want you together, but because I think I was jealous. You dating him meant you'd be closer to him than you are me. I didn't want to think about that so I tried not to, turning a blind eye to every smile you spared him and every glance he gave you."

"Dell, c'mon. you know I love you. You know you're my best friend and no one in the whole world could ever top that."

Her eyes begin to water, as do mine, and I pull her into a hug. The two of us sit there for a couple minutes, embracing one another desperately and sobbing into each other's shoulders.

"I'm so sorry for not telling you, Delly. I didn't mean to keep it from you, especially not for as long as I did. I just could never find the right time. I was scared of ruining things with Chase or freaking you out. I had no idea what would happen, so I kept putting it off."

"I get it, Jem. Just promise me you'll tell me everything now. Ok, well not everything, I don't want to hear a word about your sex life, but you know what I mean. I'm alright with this, you know, just fix things with Chase. I don't want either of you unhappy and apart on my behalf."

She chuckles as she sniffles and wipes the tears streaming down her face. "Deal."

I text Sterling letting him know I'm staying over with Jemma and he doesn't need to bring the car to me.

Jemma and I spend the rest of the night catching up on everything we missed in the course of our fight. I tell her about my new friendship with Daisy, a few stories about Sterling and I — and she hyper fixates on our sleeping arrangement — and I discuss Mason's words to me this morning.

After hours of some much needed one on one, we fall asleep and the feelings of grief and frustration I've been carrying around with me instantly go away.

Alright, I'm back! I hope you guys liked this longer chapter! I had fun writing it because I've been desperate for Jemma and Delaney to make up. I loved deepening Delaney's relationships with Mason and Daisy this chapter because I feel like I haven't been able to give them much time together thus far.

Also guys I made brownies today and they're freaking delicious, highly recommend.

Question of the chapter: Brownies or cake? (If you say cake, you're wrong.)

If you guys enjoyed please vote and comment!

Stay safe and healthy everyone! <3