The next few days flew by after we left Tahoe and got back to Vegas. I hadn't heard from Ryan at all on the new phone Cole gave me and I was feeling safer and safer by the day.

The club was going on a charity ride for the local children's hospital in Vegas. Thanksgiving is tomorrow so they are doing a toy run today to deliver toys to the kids. Cole told me this is a regular thing for the club, charity rides and toy drives. I never would have thought they would do stuff like that.

Coles dad was going to be here today too, with the California original charter of Satans Slayers, to ride with Coles club. His name is Rex Thomas but everyone calls him Screws.

Charming

I was definitely nervous.

Nervous was putting it lightly.

"You ok?" Lana asked as she sat across the kitchen table drinking a cup of coffee. It was quiet in the house, we were the only ones up and inside the house at 6:30am.

Cole and Ghost never came home last night, so not only was I worried about meeting Coles dad, the asshole didn't come home. The anxiety I felt right now made me want to puke or poop.

I didn't know which yet.

I looked up from the warn spot on the wooden table I had been spacing off at.

"I don't know" I answered her honestly

"Hey" she reached across the table and put her hand on mine "this isn't unusual for them to not come home. It might have just gotten too late to ride back or maybe it wasn't safe, so they're just laying low. He will be back today for the charity run" she tried to reassure me

"So he couldn't call? Or just text me saying that? Plus, with Rex coming and that bitch Roxie sniffing around Coles dick, yeah I'm a little...off today"

Roxie was one of the club hoes, passed around on a platter to all the guys but she wanted Cole and hated me.

She sighed heavily "Hailey...I don't know why he didn't call, but Ghost didn't either. I'm used to that, he will call when he can. Also, Rex isn't that bad. As far as Roxie goes, there's always going to be a Roxie, it's just how it is. You either trust him or you make a deal with him" she looked at me like I should know what she was talking about. He brows furrowed and her head tilted slightly to the left as she waited for me to get it.

"What kind of deal Lana, I don't know what you're getting at?" I asked annoyed. I'm not looking to solve a riddle today.

"What happens on the road...stays on the road, it doesn't come home to be thrown or flaunted in your face" she said with anger laced in her tone.

"Is that your deal with Ghost?" I asked shocked she'd agree to something like that.

She licked her lips and rubbed them together, they parted to speak, and then closed again into a hard line. She looked coldly into my eyes.

"One night, about one month into officially being labeled as his old lady, he went on a run for three days. When he came back he couldn't look at me and I knew what he'd done. I told him I didn't want to know about it. I asked him if he still wanted to be with me, ya know, if he made a mistake thinking he could settle down. He said he did want to be with me, that what he did was a mistake, he wouldn't do it again. To which, I told him, not to make promises he couldn't keep, and if he ever did it again, I didn't want to know about it. He was to keep anything he did on the road, never at home to be thrown in my face. I told him I could live with that but if any bitch ever showed up here for him, from a night on the road, then that would be it. I don't think he's ever done it again and if he has, I don't know about it" she finished quietly telling me her deal with Ghost.

Could I live with such a deal?

Do I even have to?

Or am I just over-reacting?

"I-I don't know what to say. I can't do that Lana, it makes me crazy to think about him with someone else! And that's not really fair, I mean we are expected to be loyal, why can't they be?"

"Because it's just the way it is in this world. And, that's the point of the deal, so you never have to see him with someone else"

I looked out the window and saw the familiar dust clouds on the horizon of the private dirt road as sunrise was breaking; bikes. My stomach lurched and I ran to the bathroom and threw up.

Awesome

I couldn't calm myself down, neither could Lana, I was on the verge of a panic attack. "I have to get out of here. I can't breath" I gasped and panted

I pushed past Lana and grabbed a bag and started shoving my stuff in it

"What are you doing?" Lana asked in a panicky tone

"Leaving" I whisper as my wide eyes scan the room for anything I didn't grab. I went to Coles desk drawer and grabbed two blunts, a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.

"Stop Hailey! You can't run again! Cole is the only thing keeping Ryan from finding you. What do I tell Cole?" She asked clearly irritated with me "your flight or flight is so high right now you look manic"

"Shut up Lana! Don't head shrink me right now! I'll be at your place ok? Please don't tell Cole where I am. I'll have my phone and my gun. I gotta go before they see me leave. I'll call you when I get to your house" I kissed her cheek and grabbed my bag and ran out to my Jeep and got the Hell out of there just before they could see me pull away.

Hot tears streamed down my face.

My life is so fucked up

How could I possibly think that this would work? I grabbed the smokes out of my purse, packed the Marlboro reds against my hand, opened the pack of cigarettes and put the filter to my lips. The lighter sparked up the cancer stick,as the papered glowed red, I inhaled deeply before blowing out a big freeing breath.

"I screamed and slammed my fist against the steering wheel

Did I really think getting involved in a relationship was a good idea? Or am I just that fuckin stupid? A week, less than a week, was all it took to fall in love with him.

"You're so fuckin stupid. When will you ever learn?" I ask myself out loud

I put on Halsey 'Alone' through my Bluetooth and enjoy the cigarette as it surged nicotine through my body calming me down.

I just need to...run

It's what I am good at. Keeping up the wall I built, as I stand behind it fully armored, not allowing anyone in.

I gave Cole too much too fast.

Pathetic

I'm just going to-

My phone goes off and I'm terrified to look. I don't want to talk to Cole but I want to make sure Ryan hasn't found me so I look. It's Drew. I ignore it. I hope Cole isn't too hard on him.

Drew had no idea that I would run.

Hmm do I go to Lana's or do I go to the cabin? I know where the key is and no one would look for me there because I know that eventually Lana will tell him where I am and I'm just not ready to talk to him yet. I just need a couple days to think, so I get on the road that will take me to the exit I need for Lake Tahoe before I even knew what I was doing.

————————-

AUTHORS NOTE:

Sorry if you're finding errors. I really try to edit before I post the chapter but when I go back, I do find errors and fix them. So, you may get a notification that I published, to find nothing new when you open it. I was just OCD'ing my editing 😂 sorry

Love

A💋