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> [fucking loser]

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Joseph was a fucking loser. After he graduated he could not find a job so now he stays in his parent's house helping with housework but he feels shitty all the time. One day he went and watched George Carlin. One video he watched reminded him of this other video where Charlie Chaplin talked about the passing of greed so he watched that too. And then he decided the world has went to shit.

Believing that you can do absolutely nothing is one of the worst things you can ever believe.

Joseph was a fucking loser. But he was a fucking loser with potential. His teachers always said he had a lot of wasted potential (Joseph was sure they said that about every other kid as well but he felt that it was better for him if he never asked). So he decided he had to do something to clear the world. See, Joseph subscribes to his own orginal™ thinking that if everybody worked together towards a common goal things could actually start moving. So he went and put on some music - The Eden's Project "The Fire" was always a good choice when he was about to do something he knew he would regret but went ahead to do so anyways, and took a deep breath.

They say that the Internet contains the sum of all human knowledge. But do you know where to look for the knowledge that you need?

Joseph decided that first he needs to know more about the stuff that makes up the government. So he goes and Googles so. (He has a phone, this is modern ages, everyone that doesn't have a phone is probably starving in Africa.)

The first result linked to some page called "Boundless Sociology". It talked about the idea and spread of democracy for a while before finally getting to the bit that Joseph wanted.

quot, "The modern political party system in the United States is a two-party system dominated by the Democratic Party and the Republican Party. These two parties have won every United States presidential election since 1852, and have controlled the United States Congress since at least 1856." endquot

Now Joseph was curious - what other parties are there? He Googled that too and went to Wikipedia. Immediately he tosses out the Constituiton Party - religion and politics should not mix - but that's just his opinion. Yeah, the Green Party and the Libertian Party seem pretty cool. But that's just his opinion.

Whatever. Then he decided that he had went offtrack and went to Google who were the candidates for the upcoming presidential election. The first result linked him to the New York Times. And there were 18 candidates? Wow, he is so ignorant. All this time he thought there were only Clinton and Trump. Wait, he didn't see Clinton inside this page.

Oh, they say that she has no plans for running a campaign. Wow, so out of touch.

Okay, well that throws a wrench in his plans. Wait. Can he even fulfill the requirements? He went back and Googled. Flashcards said that he needs to have:

- natural born citizen

- at least 35

- resident of US for at least 14

- experience in government

- importance of money??

Well, he doesn't have much experience in the government... Wait, informal? There were informal requirements? The last 2 were informal requirements. There's no need to fulfill informal requirements, right? Man, he had forgotten everything and gotten ignorant. Next thing you know, the protests in Hong Kong has stopped! Yeah no, they just celebrated a half-year anniversary?! Time goes by so fast.

You know what, fuck it, Joseph decided. He's going to do this despite it being a terrible terrible terrible idea. He's going to run for president. Woooo all aboard the NOPE train but he will not stop.