I couldn’t stop thinking about it. ‘I want you to love me as much as I love you’. Who says that. I can’t live life anymore. I think I might have to kill myself.

I Looked down and sighed.

“Its not going to be that hard” My new manager said. “It might seem intimidating to be talking to actresses but they’re people like you and me.”

I shook my head. “It isn’t about that. Its…personal.”

He gave a small laugh “Wife troubles?”

“Yea, you can say that....”

“Well don’t let it get to you. You need to be in a good mood to work with Leslie, shes a little…emotional. So its good to try to do everything with a smile. And don’t try to get her angry. Remember, if you do well with her a long-term position is next.” He smiled at me as he continued walking down the confusing labyrinth of hallways.

Today was my first day as a temp. The assistant for this actress was on maternity leave and they had to quickly fill in the role while she was gone. It wasn’t the best paying job. In fact, it paid horribly. But, Leslie was under the same management company as Abby. Really it was the only reason why I had planned, studied, smoothed up my resume, and acted like I loved Leslie.

As a quick summery from what I gathered:

Name - Leslie.

An actress with many support roles in popular dramas. She seemed to be getting many support roles but never any main roles. I did watch the TV shows she was in and she never really hit me, like Abby would hit me if I saw her on a TV show. There was something lacking. Her acting was fine, her looks were beyond beautiful, and every interview I watched screamed ‘great social skills’. If I were to say why…it would be due to her lack of presence. She didn’t have the IT factor.

My manager opened her dressing room “Well, let me introduce you to her.” Leslie was sitting on her chair half-asleep/half-looking at her phone. “Hey Leslie!” he said with a smile.

She turned slowly. “Hey.” Her brown hair sat under her ears. Even when she didn’t have any makeup on it looked like someone had worked hours to get every single feature just right. I took a breath.

“This is going to be your new assistant while Amie is on maternity, his name is Jake, if you need anything be sure to ask.”

I waved at her with a smile. “Hi.”

“Hey.” She said back. Her entire body screamed tired.

“Now that I’ve introduced myself I’m going to get going.” He looked one more time at Leslie. “Remember if you need anything don’t be afraid to tell Jake, he may only be temporary, but he’ll be helping you for some time.”

“Yea, I’ll be sure to tell him everything I need.”

He walked out of the room and left us both alone. Leslie looked at me. I tried to look anywhere else but at her.

“I don’t have some things for you to do right now. But..” She went on to talk about everything she wanted me to do. I listened, if only because it gave me an excuse to look at her. She really was a beauty. I loved Abby. There is nothing that will change that. However, when Leslie looked at me it made my knees weak and she was really looking at me.

But you see Abby…Abby had so much more then looks. There was something to her. A light? Yes. She had a light that surrounded her entire being.

Listening to her tell me about her morning routine, I could tell why-

“Well what do you think?”

“I agree.”

There was a silence. “Excuse me, are you even listening to me? It looks like you weren't paying attention to me even when I was taking up time to explain what my assistant does. What? Did Alex tell you everything you needed to know?”

“I…I’m sorry I was just-.”

“Oh. You’re sorry.” she turned her chair away from me and looked at me through the mirror in front of her. “I’m a nice person…but I am your boss, and if I say that you are out, you are out. At the very least you can treat me with some respect! Don’t think that you are fine just because you got this job! You are on thin ice!” She looked down at her phone. Silent.

I could tell why she wasn’t very popular in the industry. Ah. Abby would never talk to me like this. She would tell me how hard I’ve been working and how tough it must be to get along with new people in your job.

I looked at Leslie one more time. “Do you need anything right now? Maybe some coffee?”

She just looked at her phone. I repeated the question one more time. She still didn’t respond. “Well I’m going to get you some coffee, as an apology. I’m sorry.”

Just before I left I could hear her say, “Make it an iced Americano.”

Well now I had to get coffee, but that wasn’t why I went out. Yes the atmosphere was horrible. But that wasn’t why I went out either. The reason I left was because it was 9 am and 9 am was when Abby would do her walkout by the companies huge glass reception room to a car that would take her to that days schedule. Normally I would be outside somewhere trying to get a glimpse of her. But not today. Today I watched her back as she walked into the car.

It was strange.

Like going to a room everyday and then having everything inverted, it felt familiar, but at the same time completely new. I also wanted to take pictures of her. I held back. I don’t know how other people would take to me snapping a picture of her while she was going to her car. Maybe I’ll get fired. Maybe-

It looked like she was about to turn around, so I flipped myself around and started walking. I still couldn’t look her in the eye after I said that. She thinks I’m a weirdo already. What if she saw me now and thought that I was also stalking her?! I couldn’t think about it.

I walked back to Leslies room and stood on the same corner before I left. Leslie looked at me. I looked back at her.

“Do you need something?” I asked nicely

“The coffee?” she asked.

“Ah. I forgot.”

She snorted. “You know the last person who worked with me was bad, but really, she was nowhere near as bad as you are. I hope you know why you took this job. You're MY assistant. Which is actually a very simple job, do you know why people get assistants?”

“Because they need help with things?” I asked.

“Not me Jake. I don’t need your help with things. I can act by myself. I can buy my own coffee. I can drive myself. I can buy my own food. In fact, you are useless.” She looked at me. I thought about Abby and knew that even if she started slapping me it would still be worth it for her. “The ONLY thing you are here for is to make sure that I can focus on the acting, modelling, and general things I need to maintain my lifestyle. If you-”

You know her face had a certain beauty to it when she was angry. Compared to Abby her personality was horrible. But, really, there were so many men willing to compromise between personality and face that I’m sure she had her pick between men.

I am not saying that Abby is unattractive. Everything in life is a balance. You get people like this because they are too beautiful, because, I think, they are too happy. So they get a little over themselves. Abby would never do something like this because she always acted with the understanding of how precious the people around her were. Like she valued every person purely out of love.

I know. It sounds crazy, but its true. Seeing Leslie get mad over some missed coffee and going on a rant really made me love Abby more. I wonder what shes doing today?

“This.” She waved her hand over her face. “Doesn’t just come with luck. I have to work for it. And every single time that you do not bring me coffee, or do as I say!….” She sounded a little out of breath. “You waste my time, and you waste my ability to concentrate. Do you get it?”

“Yes.”

“Good. I want to work hard Jake. I don’t want you to keep this low-effort, none-attentive style you are showing. WE need to work hard to get ahead!”

“Yes. I’m sorry.”

“Good, now…uh…lets wait until 11. The makeup artists have to come and doll me up so that we can drive to the set and film my part of the show.”

“Will do, do you want some coffee?”

“Yes, please.”

“Okay. I’ll be sure to get you some now.”

I walked out one more time. And I got lost this time. You know today was my first day. There was no way I would even know where the local coffee shop was! I ended up walking around in random directions. I never knew how much like a maze the inside of a management company could be. Maybe it was to stop intruders from getting in? I think I read an article one time that said that was a common medieval strategy.

At some point I was so lost I just picked the first person in front of me and nervously asked them where the coffee shop was. It was a lady with long blonde hair. She dressed with a face mask, a hat, and a huge hoodie. Like many of Producers that littered the management companions hallways she avoided my eye contact.

“Excuse me, do you know where the coffee shop is?”

She stopped for a second. Her eyes moved left and right before settling slightly below my chin. “Are you talking to me?” she said in a light voice.

“Ah, yes, sorry. I’m new here. I just started under Leslie.”

“Ah you’re the temp!” Her voice lowered a little bit. “I’m sorry they stuck you with her. Some people in the business can be really nasty. I hope you don’t think everyone is like that.”

“No…shes…well I don’t think everyone's like that. And its my first day. She hasn’t been that bad.”

She gave a small giggle. “Don’t worry. Every one here knows what shes like. The previous assistant quit crying.”

“She quit crying?”

“Yea….” Her eyes looked sad. “I tried to cheer her up, but that Leslie is a real piece of work. She just didn’t let up.”

“Well its fine.” Its fine they lied to me. I lied to them. “I think I can handle her.”

“Well if you can’t…” she hesitated a little before she continued talking. “Well if you can’t, hang in there. I know it can be tough but it will be alright. I hate to see women like her ruin other people.” She took out her hand “I’m Emily by the way. ”

“Thank you.” Ah. This would be exactly how Abby would react if I told her about Leslie. I shook her hand. “I appreciate it.”

“No worries. And the coffee shop…” she took a second. “I don’t think there's a coffee shop in here. You might have to go to one a couple miles away.”

“Ah.” I still didn't get the company car…

I tried to walk around till 11 before I returned to the room. Leslie was getting her makeup put on by the makeup artists. She looked at me. I looked at her.

“Ah. The coffee.”

“Its okay.” She said without moving her mouth. The makeup artists would probably have to start again if she moved it. “Its your first day after all.”